anger

Anger is one of our most primal emotions and yet we have no idea how to manage it. We suppress it, allowing it to rule our lives; we hide from it, we let it explode onto people who don't deserve our rage. In this episode we break down the psychology of anger and why anger is often a secondary emotion, masking our true fear, anxiety and insecurity. We explore how to manage our anger, use it for fuel and motivation, why the anger we experience as children often leads to our inability to full express emotions, where our anger comes from and whether forgiveness truly is the solution. Listen now. 

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Tired of being misunderstood all the time?

Are you looking for ways to stop living up to other people's expectations?

Then this podcast is for you. 

Today, Jay Shetty welcomes world-ranking professional tennis player Nick Kyrgios. Nick burst onto the pro tennis scene in 2012 after a prolific junior tennis career. Since his start he has captivated fans with a larger than life personality, passion for the game, and unpredictability. Kyrgios has won 7 singles titles and 4 doubles titles in his career, but 2022 marked the first time Kyrgios displayed his dominance making it to his first Grand Slam Final, winning 3 singles titles, and 3 doubles titles. He also reached the Quarter Finals of the 2022 US Open beating then-ranked No. 1 Daniil Medvedev and is one of the few players on Tour who have beaten the Big Three (Novak Djokovic, Roger Federer, Rafael Nadal) at least once. 

In this conversation, Nick opens up about how his strong personality online has sparked hate and negativity - how misunderstood his persona is and how different he is with friends and family.

Nick also briefly talks about dark times, dealing with depression and addiction and turning the most difficult phase of his life into a pivotal moment to have the best year of his life when he reached the Wimbledon final. He also talks about looking at life beyond tennis and what awaits him in the future.

In this episode, you will learn:

• How to accept your flaws
• How to overcome fear and anger
• How to turn your life around
• How to deal with negativity
• How to become your best self

A truly inspiring story begins with a challenge and ends with a triumph, and Nick has just proven to us that success isn't elusive when you dream big and work hard for it. 

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

What We Discuss:

• 00:00 Intro
• 00:54 Enjoying Some Time Off
• 02:00 Nick Used to Hate Playing Tennis
• 03:35 Misbranded by the Media
• 06:00 The Effects of Promoting Negative Content
• 08:25 Dealing with Mental Health in Silence
• 10:49 Getting Out of the Darkest Moments
• 15:08 How Hard Work Led to Wimbledon
• 17:04 People Only See the Anger
• 19:23 People Will Always Have Something to Say
• 22:56 Being Okay with Leaving the Game Behind
• 24:52 Nick Talks About His Injury
• 25:46 Would You Spend Time with Your Haters?
• 28:25 Playing the Character of a Villain
• 29:55 The Best Crowd to Play For
• 33:32 Who is the Nice Guy Nick?
• 34:59 Tennis Is A White Privileged Sport!
• 38:34 How Media Can Negatively Affect Your Mental Health
• 44:26 How Strong Boundaries Make Relationships Work
• 49:36 An Old Conversation with Drake
• 51:50 Happiness is Spending Time with Family
• 54:44 The Many Breakdowns that People Do Not Know
• 59:14 What’s Keeping You Busy These Days?
• 01:00:30 The Best Places to Visit
• 01:02:00 Regrets of Losing a Loved One
• 01:06:44 Learning How to Bounce Back Right Away
• 01:07:58 The Hardest Lesson You Had to Learn
• 01:12:05 How Stress Can Affect How You React to People
• 01:16:24 Why Would You Break a Racket?
• 01:19:14 Routine Consistency is Hard Work
• 01:21:15 The Struggle of Letting People Down
• 01:24:13 Nick on Final Five

Episode Resources:

• Nick Kyrgios | Website
• Nick Kyrgios | X
• Nick Kyrgios | Instagram
• Nick Kyrgios | Facebook

Want to be a Jay Shetty Certified Life Coach? Get the Digital Guide and Workbook from Jay Shetty https://jayshettypurpose.com/fb-getting-started-as-a-life-coach-podcast/

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In this episode Leo talks about managing your expectations and becoming aware of subconscious transactions. These 2 things could be the cause of your suffering. This is the first episode of the realizations Leo had on his mountain escape. More are on their way! 

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Historically on this show, we want guests who either have skills that they can teach us (i.e. meditation teachers or happiness researchers) or we want people who are willing to get super personal about their interior lives—and today you're gonna meet a bold-faced name who happens to have both qualifications in spades.

Mayim Bialik burst onto the scene in the 1990s as the star of the TV show Blossom. Then she stepped away, got a bachelor's and a PhD in neuroscience, and became a mom. She returned to TV with another sitcom, The Big Bang Theory. And now she has a very full plate as the co-host of Jeopardy! and the host of a podcast of her own called Mayim’s Breakdown. Oh, and she’s also written four books, including Girling Up: How to Be Strong, Smart, and Spectacular and Boying Up: How to Be Brave, Bold, and Brilliant. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The pressures of being a teen star
• Mayim’s fascination with the brain
• How she squares her scientific expertise with her religious beliefs
• Why she half-jokingly says she was born “a mental health challenge” 
• The difference between anxiety attacks and panic disorder
• Why she's chosen to be so public about her complicated psychiatric history
• Whether it's possible to be overdiagnosed
• The tools she personally uses to stay afloat
• What’s behind her busyness, and what happened when she decided to stop working all the time
• And why at age 47, she's now taking the time to learn how to express her anger in a healthy way

A note that there are some mentions of suicide and addiction in this episode. 

Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/mayim-bialik-600 

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Alexander Dreymon is the star of a great show on Netflix called “The Last Kingdom.” He plays a Viking, so you're literally not going to find a guy who is more stereotypically masculine. But I've gotten to know Alexander recently and he's also incredibly thoughtful. 

We cover a lot of ground in this conversation: marriage, parenting, anger therapy, sleep, human connection, meditation, masculinity, and, uh, how to show your body on Netflix without developing body dysmorphia. We also talk a lot about his show, which is awesome, although it is coming to an end — just a few days ago, Netflix posted the series finale, a movie-length episode called “Seven Kings Must Die” that wraps up the whole story. 

In this episode we talk about:

• how having male friends makes his romantic relationship even better
• The importance of therapy, of silliness and of kindness
• the importance of exercise in his life and how he tries not to get overly attached to his body looking a certain way
• a whole discussion between the two of us on the Buddhist idea of non-self 
• what his meditation practice looks like now that he has a toddler around the house
• what it's like to wrap up his show, the Last Kingdom, and what might be next

Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/-alexander-dreymon-585 

To join a live coaching session, sign up at tenpercent.com/coaching.

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Brought to you by Athletic Greens’s AG1 all-in-one nutritional supplement, Helix Sleep premium mattresses, and FreshBooks cloud-based small business accounting software.

Matt Mochary (@mattmochary) coaches the heads of top Silicon Valley tech investment firms and companies on how to be the best leaders and build the best organizations possible. His philosophy and method are captured in both the Mochary Coaching Methodology (which is available as a free Google Doc) and in his book The Great CEO Within, which is available on Amazon and online (also as a free Google Doc).

As a former founder, CEO, and investor, Matt knows firsthand the challenges of those roles as well as solutions to the most commonly encountered problems. His coaching is not questions-only; there is real guidance. Matt specializes in helping CEOs and their companies (or investment firms) transition from freewheeling startups to dominant enterprises.

Please enjoy!

This episode is brought to you by FreshBooks. I’ve been talking about FreshBooks—an all-in-one invoicing + payments + accounting solution—for years now. Many entrepreneurs, as well as the contractors and freelancers that I work with, use it all the time.

FreshBooks makes it super easy to track things like expenses, project time, and client info and then merge it all into great-looking invoices. And right now, there’s a special offer just for my listeners. Head over to FreshBooks.com/Tim to get 90% off your FreshBooks subscription for 4 months.

*

This episode is also brought to you by Athletic Greens. I get asked all the time, “If you could use only one supplement, what would it be?” My answer is usually AG1 by Athletic Greens, my all-in-one nutritional insurance. I recommended it in The 4-Hour Body in 2010 and did not get paid to do so. I do my best with nutrient-dense meals, of course, but AG further covers my bases with vitamins, minerals, and whole-food-sourced micronutrients that support gut health and the immune system. 

Right now, Athletic Greens is offering you their Vitamin D Liquid Formula free with your first subscription purchase—a vital nutrient for a strong immune system and strong bones. Visit AthleticGreens.com/Tim to claim this special offer today and receive the free Vitamin D Liquid Formula (and 5 free travel packs) with your first subscription purchase! That’s up to a one-year supply of Vitamin D as added value when you try their delicious and comprehensive all-in-one daily greens product.

*

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*

[05:36] Fear and anger give bad advice.

[10:23] Dispelling dating dread.

[17:19] The power of prediction.

[27:07] Next actions.

[30:56] Turning conversations into action items.

[33:36] Accountability for introverts and extroverts.

[38:20] What is Focusmate?

[40:23] Separating decision from implementation.

[44:43] Firing well.

[51:33] Effective and efficient recruiting.

[1:01:41] Getting honest feedback from past managers.

[1:04:10] The energy audit.

[1:10:36] Running effective and efficient meetings.

[1:18:56] Reducing and removing energy-depleting obligations from the calendar.

[1:34:01] Assistance with assistants.

[1:44:37] Why did Matt stop making documentaries?

[1:55:30] Why Matt's building a startup.

[1:59:52] Rules, guide rails, and exit protocols.

[2:03:26] Downregulating anger and feeling the pain.

[2:19:16] Parting thoughts.

*

For show notes and past guests on The Tim Ferriss Show, please visit tim.blog/podcast.

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Past guests on The Tim Ferriss Show include Jerry Seinfeld, Hugh Jackman, Dr. Jane Goodall, LeBron James, Kevin Hart, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Jamie Foxx, Matthew McConaughey, Esther Perel, Elizabeth Gilbert, Terry Crews, Sia, Yuval Noah Harari, Malcolm Gladwell, Madeleine Albright, Cheryl Strayed, Jim Collins, Mary Karr, Maria Popova, Sam Harris, Michael Phelps, Bob Iger, Edward Norton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Neil Strauss, Ken Burns, Maria Sharapova, Marc Andreessen, Neil Gaiman, Neil de Grasse Tyson, Jocko Willink, Daniel Ek, Kelly Slater, Dr. Peter Attia, Seth Godin, Howard Marks, Dr. Brené Brown, Eric Schmidt, Michael Lewis, Joe Gebbia, Michael Pollan, Dr. Jordan Peterson, Vince Vaughn, Brian Koppelman, Ramit Sethi, Dax Shepard, Tony Robbins, Jim Dethmer, Dan Harris, Ray Dalio, Naval Ravikant, Vitalik Buterin, Elizabeth Lesser, Amanda Palmer, Katie Haun, Sir Richard Branson, Chuck Palahniuk, Arianna Huffington, Reid Hoffman, Bill Burr, Whitney Cummings, Rick Rubin, Dr. Vivek Murthy, Darren Aronofsky, Margaret Atwood, Mark Zuckerberg, Peter Thiel, Dr. Gabor Maté, Anne Lamott, Sarah Silverman, Dr. Andrew Huberman, and many more.

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The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Today, Alex (@AlexHormozi) talks about why it’s okay to accept the negative feelings or situations we have and leverage on these emotions instead of improving on them. Sometimes, negative fuel can drive you to do better.

Welcome to The Game w/Alex Hormozi, hosted by entrepreneur, founder, investor, author, public speaker, and content creator Alex Hormozi. On this podcast you’ll hear how to get more customers, make more profit per customer, how to keep them longer, and the many failures and lessons Alex has learned on his path from $100M to $1B in net worth.

Timestamps:

(2:03) - Utilize life's challenges as energy for motivation.

(3:49) - Connect poverty to insufficient rich-creating activities; leverage motivation sources.

(5:06) - Learn from painful past; guide for future choices.

(6:43) - Turn pain into a fuel for motivation, accept overflowing energy.

(10:22) - Gap between perceived and actual best; understand your capability.

Follow Alex Hormozi’s Socials:

LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | Acquisition

Hatred is a universal human emotion related to distancing and destroying. Hatred is anger, disgust, judgment, and contempt cemented into implacable permanence. Obsessive and inflating, hatred dupes us into feeling righteous and wrathful instead of small and wounded. Hating tricks us into projecting our disowned qualities onto an outer other, making the object of our hatred into an avatar for our own split-off instincts and desires. Our fixation fuses us in a darkly intimate way with “other,” the holder of a secret we are compelled to uncover, a truth we demand to rule. Hate hides the dread of discovering the depth of our own shadow—for it is self-hatred that we seek to encapsulate and eradicate. We can face our hatreds, let them inform us, and transform them into what is brighter and more alive.

Here’s the dream we analyze:

“I am walking and find a door that leads to a stairway. I am entranced by the stairs as they look like winding, ancient stone castle steps like in the movies. I enter and see that lining the walls up and down the stairs are cages - each cage contains a snake. As I walk down the dimly lit stairs, the snakes come alive and begin slithering, dancing, and reaching their heads up and out until a good third of each snake is out and getting closer to me. I am surprised to realize that the holes in the cages are big enough for the snakes to escape, but I am not afraid. I know the snakes will not escape completely or harm me, and I wonder why the snakes have cages at all. As I get to the bottom of the stairs, I am in a large room with books, jars, shelves, and tables. It is wonderous room, like Merlin’s workshop mixed with Dumbledore’s office. There is an older, tall man standing next to a younger woman, and they are looking at a book. I have interrupted them, they were not expecting me, but neither is startled. They both look at me with curiosity. I know I have nothing to fear but also don’t understand why I am there or where, exactly, I am. I am then standing next to them, and the young woman cries, “It has drawn blood! There is blood! Blood is drawn!” The man says nothing and calmly looks at me. I raise my hand and see a few drops of blood on my palm and know that I have been pricked by a needle. I didn’t feel the prick, and it does not hurt; I am surprised to see the blood. I suddenly know that the young woman is excited as the blood indicates that it’s her time to move on to the next level and that I am to take her place as this man’s apprentice. All of this knowledge washes over me as I look at the blood. I then become woozy, and my knees fail as I faint and fall gently to the floor.”

REFERENCES:

Robert J. Sternberg. The Psychology of Hate.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1591471842/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_BMVXGVKJEAEW7H4DHGQS

Joshua Coleman. Rules of Estrangement: Why Adult Children Cut Ties and How to Heal the Conflict

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1529350824/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_QQAC0BW1X9177KHY07W2

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You may think you know yourself, but humans have a striking inability to predict their own behavior in differing emotional states. In this episode of Stuff to Blow Your Mind, Robert and Joe explore the hot-cold empathy gap.

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Finding forgiveness can help you feel lighter, freer, and more at peace. Diana says “it's not easy, but powerful, and completely worth it.”

About Diana Winston:

Diana Winston is the Director of Mindfulness Education at UCLA's Mindful Awareness Research Center where she also teaches mindfulness practices to the general public.

Her easy-on-the-ears west coast style rests on top of a rigorous scientific mind, and a vast amount of teaching experience. She has developed curriculum and taught mindfulness since the early 90’s in a variety of settings including hospitals, universities, corporations, non profits, and schools. She has taught mindful awareness to health professionals, leaders, teachers, activists, seniors, and adolescents in the US and Asia. A published researcher and author, Diana has also written for numerous meditation publications, where her daughter, Mira, often makes an appearance in her examples of bringing mindfulness to daily life.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Forgiveness for Others,” or click here: https://10percenthappier.app.link/content?meditation=6e200a0e-c93c-442d-8c9d-bb042d6cac0e.

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She’s back y’all, Elisabeth Kristoff, Co-Host and Founder of Brain-Based Wellness. Elisabeth is a Certified Applied Neurology Practitioner who has been in the movement industry since 2007. Brain-based Wellness is a unique online holistic practice that combines applied neuroscience with strategic, high-energy workouts to achieve deep and lasting wellbeing. Join Elisabeth and I as we discuss brain-based consciousness, burnout and processing emotion. 

In this episode, I share: 

• How burnout can be robbing you of joy
• Sacrificing for ‘The Hustle’
• The pandemics effect on our nervous system
• Resolving old patterns and creating new ones 
• Unpacking the nervous system and how we can begin regulating it
• The cause of overwhelm and how our emotions are connected
• Tools your brain and body will naturally use to handle stress  
• Creating safety in the body
• Why woman have a hard time saying “NO”
• Expressing and processing emotion

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“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” - Mark Twain

I this episode, I will teach you how to get rid of your anger, forgive, and move on with your life in peace.

Follow me on Instagram @RobDialJr https://instagram.com/robdialjr