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    Self-Understanding

    Explore "Self-Understanding" with insightful episodes like "4 Steps to Build Emotional Maturity & Make Relationships Last (Tom Bilyeu Interviews Jay)", "GUEST SERIES | Dr. Paul Conti: How to Build and Maintain Healthy Relationships" and "127. Can we be too self aware?" from podcasts like ""On Purpose with Jay Shetty", "Huberman Lab" and "The Psychology of your 20s"" and more!

    Episodes (3)

    4 Steps to Build Emotional Maturity & Make Relationships Last (Tom Bilyeu Interviews Jay)

    4 Steps to Build Emotional Maturity & Make Relationships Last (Tom Bilyeu Interviews Jay)

    Do you like spending time alone or by yourself?

    How does alone time help clear your mind and fuel positive thoughts?

    Today, I am excited to share a conversation I had with Tom Bilyeu in his podcast, Impact Theory, where he interviews me about my profound journey through solitude, relationships, and self-love.

    We kick things off by shedding light on the wisdom found in ancient texts like the Vedas, which many monks study in solitude. It's a reminder that spending time alone is not a sign of weakness; in fact, it can be a powerful tool for personal growth. I share the incredible benefits of allocating just one hour a week to being alone with your thoughts, a practice that can transform your life.

    As we venture further into this enlightening conversation, we discuss the importance of dealing with life's challenges, share insights on daily meditation, and the complexities of loneliness and why it's essential to feel seen, heard, and understood in our relationships. With heartfelt anecdotes and wisdom, we explore the concept of love, self-worth, and the hard work required for genuine, lasting relationships.

    In this interview, you’ll learn:

    • How to be comfortable with being alone
    • How to sit with your inner thoughts 
    • How to prepare for love
    • The tips to finding true love
    • How to make relationships last
    • The impotence valuing self-worth
    • How to build lasting trust on others
    • How to maintain a successful marriage

    Remember, relationships are just one part of our life's journey, and it's up to us to make it a meaningful and fulfilling one. Let’s navigate the complexities of life and relationships with wisdom and love.

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    • 00:00 Intro
    • 00:35 Jay explains the vedas that most monks study in solitude
    • 03:34 Loneliness is not the enemy while being alone is not a weakness
    • 08:12 The benefits of allocating an hour a week to alone time
    • 14:12 “This bad thing happened, and now what?”
    • 17:31 Daily meditation has varying positive effects on people
    • 18:47 Why do people struggle with being alone with their thoughts?
    • 23:51 Allow yourself to have positive distractions and random thoughts
    • 27:44 Loneliness is when you don’t feel seen, heard, or understood
    • 30:46 How do you prepare for love?
    • 34:01 Jay shares an unrecorded interview with his mom
    • 35:32 “When you’ve experienced your strength, no one can make you feel weak.”
    • 37:35 Why you should not turn to others to validate your self worth
    • 38:59 Can doing hard things make life easier?
    • 43:11 The absence of a good role model and proper tools can lead to making bad choices
    • 45:15 On parenthood: Would you intervene or allow kids to learn about themselves?
    • 49:06 Top 3 things that can help develop a successful relationship
    • 54:38 Why do people select the wrong partner?  
    • 57:26 Jay talks about the four levels of trust we have for relationships
    • 01:00:13 The desperation to be loved makes us give away trust so easily
    • 01:02:20 True, genuine love takes hard work
    • 01:05:01 How can you keep your marriage sacred and successful?
    • 01:14:12 How to grow the relationship you’re currently in and in the right way
    • 01:17:05 Jay explains the consciousness of the human soul  
    • 01:19:42 A relationship isn’t everything, it is not the be-all and end-all of your journey
    • 01:22:55 Would you live your life in a hypothesis?

    Want to be a Jay Shetty Certified Life Coach? Get the Digital Guide and Workbook from Jay Shetty https://jayshettypurpose.com/fb-getting-started-as-a-life-coach-podcast/

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    GUEST SERIES | Dr. Paul Conti: How to Build and Maintain Healthy Relationships

    GUEST SERIES | Dr. Paul Conti: How to Build and Maintain Healthy Relationships
    This is episode 3 of a 4-part special series on mental health with Dr. Paul Conti, M.D., a psychiatrist who did his medical training at Stanford School of Medicine and residency at Harvard Medical School. He is the author of the book, “Trauma: The Invisible Epidemic.” Dr. Conti explains how to find, develop and strengthen healthy relationships — including romantic relationships, work and colleague relationships, and friendships. He explains a roadmap of the conscious and unconscious mind that can allow anyone to navigate conflicts better and set healthy boundaries in relationships. We also discuss common features of unhealthy relationships and clinically supported tools for dealing with relationship insecurity, excessive anxiety, past traumas, manipulation and abuse. Dr. Conti explains how, in healthy relationships, there emerges a dynamic of the mutually generative “us” and how to continually improve that dynamic. The next episode in this special series explores true self-care, which can be cultivated through a process of building self-awareness along with other important practices.   For the full show notes, visit hubermanlab.com. Thank you to our sponsors AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman BetterHelp: https://betterhelp.com/huberman Waking Up: https://wakingup.com/huberman Eight Sleep: https://eightsleep.com/huberman Momentous: https://livemomentous.com/huberman Timestamps (00:00:00) Build Healthy Relationships (00:02:04) Sponsors: BetterHelp & Waking Up (00:05:01) Healthiest Self in Relationships (00:10:51) Structure & Function of Self (00:15:44) Relationships, Levels of Emergence (00:22:48) Generative Drive in Relationships (00:35:00) Sponsor: AG1 (00:36:26) Generative Drive, Aggressive Drive, Pleasure Drive (00:45:16) Romantic Relationships & Matched Generative Drives, Trauma Bonds (00:53:05) Generative Drive Expression, Libido, Giving & Taking (01:04:29) Sponsor: Eight Sleep (01:05:50) Generative Drive in Partnerships (01:11:16) Libido, Avoidance & Working through Barriers (01:18:02) Repeating Bad Relationship Patterns, Repetition Compulsion (01:29:23) Narcissism, Dependence, Attachment Insecurity (01:34:10) Abusive Relationships, Demoralization (01:39:37) Oppressors, Darkness, Hope & Change (01:48:08) Work Relationships, Oppression & Accountability (01:53:53) Jealousy vs. Envy, Narcissism (01:59:13) Power Dynamics in Relationships (02:05:54) Giving vs. Taking in Relationships (02:09:39) Transactions & Relationships; Family & Generative Drive; Flexibility (02:19:47) Relationships & Kindergarten (02:23:04) Anxiety in Relationships, Communication (02:31:32) The “Magic Bridge of the Us” (02:37:09) Mentalization, Getting into Another’s Mindset; Navigating Conflict (02:46:51) Healthy Boundaries (02:52:08) Self-Awareness, Mentalization (02:55:28) “Broken Compass” & Self Inquiry, “Map” Analogy (03:02:25) Zero-Cost Support, YouTube Feedback, Spotify & Apple Reviews, Sponsors, Social Media, Momentous, Neural Network Newsletter Title Card Photo Credit: Mike Blabac Disclaimer

    127. Can we be too self aware?

    127. Can we be too self aware?

    This is a question I have been asking myself a lot recently as someone who is VERY invested in the self-help space. Have we reached a point where we are too aware of our problems, faults, thoughts, actions and behaviours? Self awareness can free us from so many mental restrictions, it allows us to make better decisions, be a better friend, a better person, invest in our dreams and values. But at some point, we can reach a stage where we are too invested in self-reflection and introspection that it interrupts our enjoyment of the moment, can isolate us or even result in obsessive overthinking and rumination. In this episode we explore what it means to be self-aware and how online self help content might be causing us more harm than good. Listen now. 

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