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    How to Motivate Yourself: Leverage Dopamine & Overcome Your Excuses

    Embrace failure and take action without waiting for motivation. Tap into your greatness, give your all, and live without regrets, knowing you gave it your best.

    enJanuary 11, 2024

    About this Episode

    Do you want to know the surprising truth about motivation?

    Right now, think about something you want to change or improve.

    How do you make lasting and powerful changes and life improvements? And how do you keep going even when you don’t have the motivation to do it?

    If change was easy, we’d all have six-pack abs and a million dollars in the bank.

    And that’s where this episode comes in: Mel is here to teach you the HOW.

     

    In this episode, you’ll learn:

    • How to self-motivate so you can take action.
    • What dopamine is and how it’s linked to motivation.
    • The simple steps you can take today to tap back into your internal drive.
    • The 2 truths about motivation that you are forgetting.
    • The research-backed reason you continue, initiate, or quit something.
    • What to do when someone you love is losing motivation.
    • The real reason you cannot motivate others.
    • How to cope with not getting something you have been working towards.
    • How to navigate feeling “behind” or in a “comparison game”.
    • How to pick yourself back up when you feel like life’s punched you in the face.
    • The first (and most important) step in understanding what drives your motivation.
    • One powerful question to ask yourself when you feel “stuck”.
    • What role dreams and goals play (and it’s not always to achieve them).
    • How to hack the moment of hesitation we all feel.
    • The most powerful reframe you need about failing.
    • How to get clear about the direction you are going in without wandering aimlessly.
    • Mel’s 5-second rule that will move you towards action (even when you are not motivated).

     

    This episode comes with a 29-page companion workbook. This workbook is designed using the latest research to help you get clear about what you want and empower you to take the next step forward in your life. And the cool part? It takes less than a minute for you to get your hands on it.

     

    Just sign up at melrobbins.com/bestyear

     

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    Check out Mel’s book, The High 5 Habit: https://a.co/d/g1DQ8Pt

     

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    Disclaimer

    🔑 Key Takeaways

    • Self-motivation can be fleeting, but understanding its fluctuations allows us to persevere through setbacks and stay committed to our goals.
    • Rejection is a part of life, but it doesn't define your worth. Stay resilient, learn from setbacks, and keep pushing forward towards future success.
    • It's normal to feel demoralized after setbacks, but it's important to remember that you're not alone. Take the time to acknowledge and process your emotions, trust the journey, and have faith in yourself.
    • Motivation comes from within, and understanding its true definition can help you find your inner drive and bounce back stronger in the face of challenges.
    • Motivation is driven by our desire to fulfill cravings and achieve desired things. Understanding the role of dopamine helps us comprehend the science of motivation and dispels misconceptions about instant motivation.
    • Waiting for motivation to strike is futile; instead, we must push ourselves to take action even when we don't feel like it. We must overcome our feelings and do the work.
    • Self-motivation is essential for achieving our goals. It requires understanding our aspirations, evaluating setbacks, and pushing beyond comfort zones to become the person we aspire to be.
    • Knowing why something is important to you helps with self-regulation, prioritization, and the ability to make sacrifices and put in effort, leading to incredible results.
    • Motivation is not always reliable, but by reminding ourselves of the importance of a task, we can push ourselves to take action even when we lack motivation.
    • Motivation is not always spontaneous; we must understand what needs to be done, why it should be done, and push through hesitation to achieve greatness.
    • Embrace failure and take action without waiting for motivation. Tap into your greatness, give your all, and live without regrets, knowing you gave it your best.
    • Understanding your goals and reasons for pursuing them is the key to self-motivation and taking consistent action towards creating a better life for yourself.

    📝 Podcast Summary

    Navigating the Ups and Downs of Self-Motivation

    Self-motivation is something we all desire, but often struggle to understand and maintain. It's common to feel motivated when making plans and setting goals, yet life has a way of stripping away that motivation just when we need it the most. This is a universal experience, whether it's waiting for a college acceptance, job offer, or awaiting the results of a loved one's achievement. Mel Robbins shares a personal story about her son's college application process, highlighting the dedication and hard work he invested in pursuing his dreams. Understanding the ups and downs of self-motivation helps us navigate setbacks and remain committed to our goals, even when motivation wanes.

    The reality of rejections and setbacks, and how to navigate through them.

    Life is full of rejections and setbacks, and it can be incredibly difficult when it happens to someone you love. This story about Oakley's college application rejection reminds us that even when you put in the work and have an impressive resume, things may not always go your way. It's important to recognize that rejection is a natural part of life and doesn't determine your worth or potential. Whether it's college applications, job interviews, or unexpected layoffs, setbacks can happen to anyone. Instead of responding with a motivational pep talk, it's crucial to offer support and understanding. Ultimately, the key is to keep pushing forward, learn from the experience, and remember that setbacks do not define your future success.

    Processing Rejection and Setbacks: Embracing Your Emotions and Regaining Motivation

    It is natural and healthy to feel demoralized and unmotivated after experiencing rejection or setbacks. It's important to acknowledge and process these emotions rather than rushing past them. Whether it's being rejected from a desired school, going through a breakup, struggling to achieve a goal, or feeling like everyone else is succeeding while you're not, these feelings are common and valid. However, it's crucial to remember that you're not alone in experiencing these emotions. You have the power to take action and regain motivation. Understand that setbacks happen for a reason and trust that you will ultimately end up where you need to be.

    Tapping into your inner drive for self-motivation and resilience.

    Motivation is not something that can be given or received like a pint of beer. It is an internal drive that comes from within. Whether it's facing rejection, worrying about a loved one's future, or feeling unmotivated yourself, there are tactics you can employ to tap into that self-motivation. Understanding the true definition of motivation and its connection to dopamine is crucial. Additionally, utilizing essential strategies based on research can help you find that inner drive and inspire you to bounce back stronger. Remember, you're not alone in feeling this way, and it's important to share this episode with those who may need it. Stay tuned for more insights and a special gift to guide you in creating the best year ever.

    The Role of Dopamine in Motivation

    Motivation is simply the feeling of wanting to do something. When you feel motivated, it's easy to take action because you have a desire to do it. Dopamine, often referred to as the molecule of motivation, plays a role in our brain's reward system. It is tied to cravings and things we want, driving us towards those desired things. For example, when you're hungry, you feel motivated to look in the fridge and cook dinner. However, you may find it difficult to motivate yourself to clean up after eating. Understanding the role of dopamine helps us comprehend the science of motivation and dispels misconceptions that dopamine alone can instantly create motivation.

    The Role of Dopamine in Motivation

    Motivation is not always readily available when we need it most. Dopamine, the molecule of motivation, is tied to our cravings and desires. We feel motivated to pursue things we enjoy or crave like food, drugs, sex, and social media. However, when it comes to tasks like college applications, cleaning, or working on our goals, we often lack motivation because we don't crave those activities. Waiting for motivation to strike is futile because it may never come. Instead, we must push ourselves to take action even when we don't feel like it. Knowing what needs to be done is not enough; we must overcome our feelings and do the work.

    The importance of self-motivation and personal growth in achieving our goals.

    Self-motivation is crucial in achieving our goals. We can't rely on others to do the work for us or to motivate us. We must remind ourselves of why our aspirations matter to us. Understanding exactly what we want and why we want it is essential for self-motivation. It's important to take the time to decompress and evaluate our options when facing setbacks or rejections. We should consider alternative paths if necessary, keeping in mind that dreams and goals are not just about achievement, but about personal growth and becoming the person we aspire to be. Reaching for our dreams pushes us to go beyond our comfort zones and do things we wouldn't normally do.

    Understanding Your "Why" for Goal Achievement

    Knowing your why is essential for achieving your goals. Research from the University of Oregon shows that understanding why something matters to you helps with self-regulation and prioritizing the work that needs to be done. When you know why something is important, you're more likely to make sacrifices and put in the effort, even when it's difficult or tempting to give up. This is why it's crucial to take the time to figure out what you want and why you want it. Mel Robbins offers a free workbook that can help you gain clarity on your goals and motivations. When you tap into self-motivation fueled by your why, you can achieve incredible results.

    Hacking Motivation: Taking Action When You Don't Feel Like it

    Motivation is just a feeling. It's not always going to be there, especially for tasks we don't enjoy or crave. However, we can still take action by hacking our motivation. The first step is reminding ourselves why something matters to us, even if it's something as simple as doing the dishes. For example, doing the dishes ensures a clean and pleasant start to the day, rather than facing a sink full of dirty dishes and feeling frustrated. By understanding that we can't rely solely on motivation, we can push ourselves to take action even when we don't feel like it. Ultimately, it's about recognizing that our feelings don't always dictate our actions.

    Overcoming Hesitation and Taking Action

    Self-motivation is all about pushing through hesitation and taking action, even when we don't feel like it. Mel Robbins highlights the importance of doing the dishes at night, not because it's easy or enjoyable, but because it sets us up for a great morning. Similarly, Nike's powerful tagline "Just do it" emphasizes the universal moment of hesitation we experience when we're afraid or feel unworthy. The key is to recognize that motivation doesn't always come naturally, and waiting for it to strike will only hold us back. Instead, we must understand what we need to do, why we need to do it, and force ourselves through the hesitation, tapping into our own greatness and embracing the power of action.

    Unleashing Potential: Pushing Through Lack of Motivation to Achieve Success

    Motivation is not the key to success. Instead, it's about knowing why something matters to you and pushing through the lack of motivation to take action. By doing so, you tap into the greatness that is inside of you and open doors to the life you're meant to lead. Failure is a natural and important part of the journey, but it should be embraced with full speed. Whether it's pursuing top schools, dream jobs, or overcoming health challenges, give your all and attack it without waiting for motivation to kick in. Slowing down to understand what you want and why is crucial before putting your heart and effort into it. Don't live with regret, rather embrace failure and try your best, knowing that you gave it your all.

    The Power of Self-Motivation

    Self-motivation relies on understanding what you want and why you want it. It's about giving your best effort, even if that means only having a small percentage of energy on certain days. The key is to know how much you have to give and to give it wholeheartedly. When you find yourself hesitating or lacking motivation, remind yourself of why your goal matters. Whether it's a big task or a small one, this reminder will bring clarity and push you through any excuses or emotions. Motivation may not always come naturally, but by understanding what you want and why you want it, you can take action and create a better life for yourself.

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