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    179. Why can't I cry?

    Engaging in creative activities can help us process and express emotions, leading to new perspectives and catharsis.

    enMarch 19, 2024

    About this Episode

    Sometimes all we want to do is a have a big, old fashioned sob and when we can't it leads us feeling emotionally pent up, defective and frustrated. There's an explanation for why we go through periods where we are unable to cry. In today's episode we discuss: 

    • The evolutionary function of crying
    • Crying as an attachment behaviour 
    • The difference between basal, reflex and emotional tears 
    • The 4 major reasons we struggle with crying 
    • How to heal your connection with your emotions 
    • How we process emotions through the body, and more.

    Listen now when you're in need of an emotional catharsis or could really do with a few tears. 

    Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg

    Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast

     

     

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    🔑 Key Takeaways

    • Protect your teeth with Pronamel, create impressive presentations with Canva, manage finances with Intuit, maintain health with Nature's Way, and embrace emotional expression
    • Crying is a natural response to emotions, releasing stress and connecting with others, but difficulty crying can lead to frustration and pent-up energy. Understanding emotional suppression can help find relief and healing.
    • Crying releases hormones like endorphins and oxytocin for pain relief and emotional catharsis, activates the parasympathetic nervous system for relaxation, and is a socially accepted way to express and release pain.
    • Crying is a natural response for attention and help, activating empathy and promoting closeness. Absence of crying may indicate emotional disconnection or insecure attachment.
    • Following a loss or heartbreak, our initial response is a protective mechanism that helps us cope. However, delaying emotional processing can lead to emotional stagnation and unexpected triggers.
    • Some mental health conditions and medications can hinder our ability to cry and feel emotions deeply. It's essential to remember that emotional expression and managing mental health are interconnected, and seeking help from a therapist can provide valuable insights.
    • People's emotional expression varies, influenced by personality, socialization, culture, and past experiences. Suppression of emotions can lead to imbalances and impact mental health. Healthy ways to process and express emotions are crucial for emotional well-being.
    • Use Pronamel toothpaste and mouthwash for oral health, Conair Girl Bomb for hair removal, Neutrophil supplement for hair growth, and Nature's Way gummies for overall wellness. These self-care products can boost confidence and improve overall well-being.
    • Focus on noticing emotions in your body through a body scan, talking to friends, and finding a creative outlet to help unlock emotional recognition and release. Emotions and physical sensations are connected, and paying attention to your body can help you better understand unrecognized emotions.
    • Recognizing emotional tension and sharing emotions with trusted friends can lead to increased self-acceptance, validation, and emotional connection. Engaging in creative outlets can also provide a healthy way to express and release emotions.
    • Engaging in creative activities can help us process and express emotions, leading to new perspectives and catharsis.
    • Use Pronamel toothpaste and mouthwash for dental health, try Conair Girl Bomb for hair removal, celebrate Black History Month with Walmart's Black and Unlimited Clock event, and take multivitamins like Nature's Way Alive Women's Multivitamin Gummies for overall health.

    📝 Podcast Summary

    Taking care of ourselves in our 20s: From teeth to emotions

    Taking care of ourselves in our 20s is crucial, whether it's protecting our teeth with Pronamel, creating impressive presentations with Canva, managing our finances with Intuit, or maintaining our health with Nature's Way multivitamins. Another important reminder is the significance of expressing emotions, including crying, as a means to process and move forward. Pronamel, with its intensive enamel repair toothpaste and new mouthwash, is the number one dentist-recommended brand for acid erosion protection. Canva presentations offer an easy and quick solution for creating professional slides for various needs. Intuit is a financial platform that caters to individuals and small businesses, providing tools for managing money and living financially healthy lives. Nature's Way Alive women's multivitamin gummies offer a simple and delicious way to support overall well-being, including healthy hair, skin, and nails. Crying, although often avoided, can be a powerful emotional release, offering a chance to process pain and self-pity. Embrace the small yet meaningful aspects of life, from taking care of our teeth to expressing emotions, as we navigate the transitions and challenges of our 20s.

    The Natural Response to Emotional Stimuli

    Crying is a natural response to emotional stimuli, and it serves important functions for our emotional and psychological well-being. Our bodies produce emotional tears when our limbic system, the part of our brain that regulates emotions, is activated. These tears contain hormones and proteins, including stress hormones like cortisol, indicating a more complex and psychological process. Evolutionarily, crying helps us release emotions, connect with others, and even process pain. When we have difficulty crying despite strong emotions, it can lead to frustration, anger, and pent-up energy. Understanding the reasons for emotional suppression and exploring ways to reconnect with our emotions can help us find relief and healing.

    Crying: A Natural Response for Pain Relief and Emotional Catharsis

    Crying is a natural response to emotional or physical pain that provides both physical and emotional relief. When we cry, our bodies release hormones like endorphins and oxytocin, which act as natural painkillers and provide an emotional catharsis. Crying also activates the parasympathetic nervous system, helping us relax and think more rationally. Ancient civilizations saw tears as having healing properties, and modern research continues to support this idea. Crying is a socially accepted way to express and release pain, and it can have a self-soothing effect. Additionally, the act of crying releases stress hormones, potentially contributing to a reduction in overall stress levels. Overall, crying is a powerful and effective way for our bodies to process and respond to pain.

    Crying as a Signal for Help and Closeness

    Crying is a natural and instinctual behavior that serves as a signal for attention and help, promoting closeness, empathy, and kindness. It is an attachment behavior that activates the brain's empathy center and motivates others to provide care and comfort. The absence of crying, especially during times of distress, may indicate an insecure attachment style or emotional disconnection. However, it's important to remember that not crying doesn't always mean one is not feeling emotions deeply. Other reasons for not crying include being genuinely happy or experiencing shock, which can delay emotional processing.

    Protective mechanism for emotional shock

    The initial shock or denial following a loss or heartbreak is a protective mechanism that helps us compartmentalize emotions until we are mentally prepared to deal with them. This is an evolutionary response that has carried over from our ancient past when delaying emotional reactions could mean the difference between life and death. However, this delay can result in months or even years of emotional stagnation, and the release of pent-up emotions can be triggered by seemingly insignificant events. Additionally, certain medications like antidepressants and SSRI's can blunt emotions, making it even more challenging to process and express feelings. It's important to remember that the brain and mind don't always operate according to our rules and timelines.

    Impact of mental health conditions and medications on crying and emotions

    Certain mental health conditions and medications can impact our ability to cry and experience emotions deeply. The speaker shared her personal experience of being on Lexapro for three years and being unable to cry despite going through significant life events. She described this as a trade-off between managing anxiety or depressive thoughts and being fully emotionally expressive. It's important to note that depression can also cause emotional numbness, making it difficult to cry or feel anything at all. Emotional repression, the unconscious act of pushing down feelings, is another common reason for an inability to cry. It's crucial to remember that everyone deals with emotions differently, and it's essential to talk to a therapist if you're experiencing significant emotional changes.

    Factors affecting people's ability to cry

    People's ability to cry and express emotions varies greatly due to a combination of factors including personality traits, socialization, cultural influences, and past experiences. Some people are more expressive and cry easily, while others suppress their emotions. The origins of this inability to cry can often be traced back to childhood experiences, where expressing emotions was not accepted or even punished. This suppression of emotions can lead to other emotional imbalances, such as increased anger or rage. It's important to recognize that emotions are a natural part of being human, and suppressing them doesn't make them go away. Instead, it's crucial to find healthy ways to process and express emotions, rather than suppressing them. This may involve exploring the underlying causes of the emotional blockage and seeking support from trusted sources. Ultimately, emotional expression is a vital part of mental and emotional well-being, and it's essential to create an environment that accepts and validates all emotions.

    Protecting oral health and enhancing physical appearance

    Taking care of both our oral health and physical appearance is essential for overall well-being. For oral health, Pronamel intensive enamel repair toothpaste and mouthwash can help protect and repair weakened enamel, making it the number one dentist-recommended brand for acid erosion. For physical appearance, Conair Girl Bomb offers effective hair removal tools with professional-grade blades and a comfortable grip, empowering women to achieve smooth, flawless results and boost their confidence. Additionally, Neutrophil hair growth supplement addresses the root causes of hair thinning with a whole-body approach, providing thicker, stronger, and faster-growing hair. Lastly, Nature's Way Alive Women's Multivitamin Gummies support women's health with essential vitamins and minerals, including calcium and vitamin D for bone health and healthy hair, skin, and nails. Overall, investing in these self-care products can lead to improved confidence, empowerment, and overall well-being.

    Understanding Emotions Through the Body

    An inability to cry or express emotions is not a plumbing problem that can be fixed by force. Instead, it's a deeper emotional disconnect that needs healing. To get past this, focus on noticing emotions in your body through a body scan, talking to friends about their feelings, and finding a creative outlet. Emotions and physical sensations are connected, and paying attention to your body can help unlock emotional recognition and release. For instance, anger is felt in the chest and head, fear in the stomach and chest, sadness in the face, throat, and limbs, and emotional pain all over. By tapping into these sensations, you can better understand what your body is trying to communicate. Don't ignore the signs; they're your brain's way of communicating unrecognized emotions.

    Exploring Emotional Tension and Connection

    Recognizing and addressing emotional tension in the body, through practices like progressive muscle relaxation and talking to trusted friends, can lead to increased self-acceptance, validation, and emotional connection. By becoming curious about and sharing our emotions with others, we can build stronger relationships and foster a greater sense of community and understanding. Additionally, engaging in creative outlets can provide a healthy and tangible way to express and release emotions. Overall, prioritizing emotional awareness and expression can lead to increased acceptance, kindness, and connection in our lives.

    Exploring emotions through creative activities

    Engaging in creative or physical activities can help us access and process emotions that we may be neglecting or finding difficult to express. This can lead to a sense of opening up and discovering new perspectives, both internally and externally. Art therapy is an example of this, as it provides a safe space for emotional expression and can help regulate emotions. The act of creating, even if it's not objectively good, can expand our access to our emotions and provide inspiration and motivation. It's important to be gentle with ourselves during this process and remember that everyone experiences emotions differently and at their own pace. The emotions we're struggling with are valid and there are ways to work through them. Engaging in creative activities can help us feel emotionally safe and secure, which can ultimately lead to the release of tears and catharsis. Remember, you're not alone in your emotional journey and there are many resources and ways to work through difficult emotions.

    Taking Care of Ourselves and Our Belongings

    Taking care of ourselves and our belongings is essential, especially during our twenties when we may be neglecting important self-care routines. For dental health, using Pronamel toothpaste and mouthwash can help repair acid-weakened enamel and protect our teeth. For hair removal, Conair Girl Bomb provides precise and powerful tools for smooth results. During Black History Month, Walmart's Black and Unlimited Clock event offers an opportunity to try and share black-led products, creating a new world of choice. Lastly, taking multivitamins like Nature's Way Alive Women's Multivitamin Gummies can help support overall health and wellbeing for women. Remember, investing in ourselves and our belongings can lead to better outcomes and improved daily routines. Stay tuned to the podcast for more sponsor spotlights and self-care tips.

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