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    81. Date yourself instead ft. Lyss Boss

    enApril 12, 2023

    About this Episode

    This week we are joined by Lyss Boss, the host of Date Yourself Instead, to discuss dating in our 20's, particularly what it means to deliberately choose to be single, how we can learn from past relationships and heal our attachment styles. Alongside this we dive into the psychology behind karmic relationships, repeating toxic patterns in relationships and learning to move on through authenticity and creativity. Listen now! 

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    ūüĒĎ Key Takeaways

    • Break-ups can be tough, but it's important to focus on building yourself up and learning to love yourself. Take time to date yourself and prioritize self-care to become your best self.
    • Creating podcast content can aid in the healing process post-breakup by providing a platform for emotional expression and self-discovery, while also promoting self-love and understanding the importance of self-worth in relationships.
    • To attract healthy relationships, it's crucial to focus on self-love and self-worth. Childhood experiences can affect our level of self-worth, and it's important to acknowledge and heal from them before jumping into a relationship.
    • Acknowledge your worth, do the inner work to change negative relationship patterns, and explore the concept of karmic ties. Remember that life has highs and lows and it's okay to not be perfect.
    • We attract certain people into our lives to learn valuable lessons and grow. The universe sends them our way to teach us, even if it may be a difficult process.
    • Heartbreak can teach us the importance of self-love and setting high standards in relationships. Use past experiences to grow and start new passion projects.
    • Rejection in relationships can be a difficult experience, but it can also be an opportunity for personal growth and redirection towards new paths. It's important to use these experiences as motivation for positive change and to do proper research before taking major life steps.
    • Take time to understand your values, boundaries, and beliefs before entering a relationship. Being comfortable in your own identity can prevent heartbreak and losing yourself in the relationship. Difficult experiences teach valuable lessons.
    • Going through tough situations can help one grow personally. Taking time for solitude and self-reflection can be empowering. Listening to your inner voice and prioritizing your own healing over others' advice helps in gaining clarity and self-awareness.
    • Taking time for yourself is essential to love yourself fully. Separating your energy and taking a break from others can help you recharge and refocus. This podcast is a valuable resource for those going through a tough time in their romantic life.

    ūüďĚ Podcast Summary

    The importance of self-love and care in your twenties

    The Psychology of your 20s podcast discusses life changes and transition in your twenties, focusing on topics such as dating, knowing your worth, dealing with rejection, and moving on. The latest episode features guest Liss from the Date Yourself Instead podcast. The show discusses the importance of building yourself up following a break-up, learning to love yourself and date yourself instead. The podcast aims to help listeners heal and become their best selves. The episode gives great insight into the challenges of dating in your twenties and discusses the message of self-love and care.

    Starting a Podcast for Healing After a Breakup

    Starting a podcast after a breakup can be a great way to undertake the grieving and healing process in a place of accountability. Through creating content, you're forced to speak about your emotions and come to the table with mature thinking. It also allows you to reclaim parts of your identity that you feel have been co-opted by the other person. The podcast can evolve into a space of self-discovery and self-love where you can help others going through the same things. True self-love is about inner work, understanding your value as a human being, and not beating yourself up over mistakes in relationships. Self-worth impacts who we choose to date, how we approach dating, how we handle rejection, and even breakups.

    The Importance of Self-Worth and Self-Love in Relationships

    Self-worth and self-love are crucial when it comes to attracting healthy relationships. Many of us are not taught this growing up and may not receive the emotional fulfillment we need from our parents or caregivers. As a result, it can affect our level of self-worth and affect the relationships we attract. It's important to work on ourselves and heal before jumping into a relationship. Our childhood experiences can determine so much of how we see ourselves moving forward, and it's important to acknowledge and heal from them. We accept the love we think we deserve, so it's crucial to focus on self-love and self-worth before entering into any relationship.

    The Importance of Self-Worth and Breaking Negative Relationship Patterns

    It's important to have a sense of self-worth and value, and to examine why you may be attracting the same type of negative relationships. While you may not be fully healed 100% of the time, acknowledging your self-worth is the first step on a long journey towards self-love, and it's important to do the inner work necessary to change the pattern of relationships. It's also important to recognize that we all go through highs and lows in life and nothing is ever perfect. Lastly, it's worth exploring the concept of karmic relationships and ties, and how they may be playing a role in our lives.

    Lessons from Attracting Similar Types of People

    In this conversation, the speaker reflects on their dating history and realizes that they keep attracting similar types of people who are not capable of commitment or need to be "mothered." They believe that the universe sends these people to teach them a lesson and help them grow. The speaker also discusses their religious beliefs or lack thereof and how they consider themselves spiritual, believing in a higher power that guides them. We attract certain people into our lives to learn valuable lessons and grow, even if it may be a difficult process.

    Learning About Self-Love From Heartbreak

    The speaker describes a past relationship that was satisfying in some ways, but ultimately ended in heartbreak. The experience taught her about self-love and the importance of setting high standards and not settling for a bad relationship. She believes that heartbreak can be a powerful teacher and that it is possible to turn pain into creativity, such as starting a new passion project. Relationships can teach us a lot about ourselves and our worth, and it's important to take time to reflect and learn from past experiences in order to grow and set a high standard for future relationships.

    How Rejection Can Lead to Personal Growth and Major Life Changes

    Rejection can be turned into redirection. Every failed relationship takes you to a new place and contributes to personal growth. It is important to do proper research before traveling to a new place. The speaker's relationship experiences led to her starting a podcast, moving to Sydney, and realizing her self-worth. A failed relationship can also be a push to make a major life change.

    Why Knowing Yourself is Key to Successful Relationships

    It is important that you know who you are and having a clear understanding of your values, boundaries, and beliefs before getting into any kind of relationship. Taking time for yourself and being comfortable in your own identity can save you from heartbreak and prevent you from losing yourself in relationships. It's also important to not be too hard on yourself and to understand that difficult experiences can shape and teach us valuable lessons.

    Personal Growth Through Difficult Experiences and Self-Reflection

    Going through difficult experiences can lead to personal growth and gratitude, and that taking time for solitude and self-reflection can be a powerful tool for personal development. It's important to listen to your own inner voice and prioritize your own healing, rather than getting too caught up in the opinions or advice of others. By embracing a healthy perspective towards challenges and making space for introspection, we can move forward with greater clarity and self-awareness.

    The Importance of Alone Time in Self-Love and Dating

    Taking time for yourself is crucial to truly love yourself, but that doesn't mean you have to isolate yourself from others. It's important to separate your energy from others every now and then to recharge and re-center. This podcast covers a range of topics related to self-love and dating, from dealing with rejection and heartbreak to the importance of alone time. It's a valuable resource, especially for those who are going through a hard time in terms of their romantic life. If you enjoyed this episode, share it with a friend and leave a five-star review to help the podcast grow and reach new listeners.

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