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    3 Ways To Get The Most Out Of Therapy & How Therapy Isn't Only for Big Issues and Problems

    Taking time to invest in ourselves and our self-care is essential for personal growth and collective progress.

    enDecember 30, 2022

    About this Episode

    Today, I'm joined by Haesue Jo, Licensed Therapist & Head of Clinical Operations at BetterHelp, with years of experience providing individual and family therapy in community mental health. Her current clinical focus includes working with individuals with a variety of presenting problems, including anxiety, relationship and family issues, trauma, community violence, gender identity, and depression.

    In this session, we sit down with Ulato Sam as he talks about the challenges he had growing up, the hardships that comes when migrating into a new country as a person of color, overcoming the pressure of preconceived beliefs other people have, and learning the necessary skills and tools to be able to fend for yourself and still have the heart to help others.  

    Disclaimer: Haesue Jo is not Ulato's actual therapist, and they are not in a therapist-client relationship.

    This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.

    What We Discuss:

    • 00:00:00 Intro
    • 00:02:32 Growing up in Jamaica
    • 00:06:06 Not fully understanding self awareness 
    • 00:14:33 Expressing your thoughts without perspective interference
    • 00:17:33 The reality of moving into a new place
    • 00:22:01 Motivation to overcome societal pressure
    • 00:25:16 Where did you learn these skills?
    • 00:28:01 The pressure of life never stops
    • 00:32:00 “You should eat so as not to get hungry.”
    • 00:36:45 We all grow up with different experiences
    • 00:40:30 Tools we need to survive and thrive

    Episode Resources

    Want to be a Jay Shetty Certified Life Coach? Get the Digital Guide and Workbook from Jay Shetty

     https://jayshettypurpose.com/fb-getting-started-as-a-life-coach-podcast/

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    🔑 Key Takeaways

    • Developing effective communication skills and pursuing excellence in sports can help individuals to make their mark on the world while maintaining a strong sense of identity and understanding of their wider cultures and societies.
    • Taking the time to be honest with ourselves about our emotions and experiences is an essential step to understanding our feelings and making informed decisions.
    • Therapy offers a supportive and judgement-free environment to express thoughts and feelings without distraction.
    • Understanding the realities of racial inequality and staying safe requires having conversations with people of different races and being aware of how to present oneself in different situations.
    • We can use our experiences, and those of those around us, to become a beacon of hope and empowerment in the face of adversity.
    • Taking a moment to breathe can help us unlock the power of sound healing and connection to our loved ones.
    • Self-reflection is an integral part of personal growth and development, and can help us to identify our strengths and make a positive difference in our community.
    • Through therapy, we can discover our values, process our experiences, and use them to create positive change in the world.
    • Intersectionality can help us understand different plights, and give us the confidence to find a sense of belonging.
    • With the right resources and support, everyone has the capacity to learn and grow.
    • Taking time to invest in ourselves and our self-care is essential for personal growth and collective progress.

    📝 Podcast Summary

    Communication and Performance: The Keys to Success in Family, Sports, and Life

    An individual has many roles in life, such as being a son, a big brother and so on, which come with certain duties.Family is the foundation for identity and understanding of wider cultures and societies.Communication is essential for humanity, and it's even more relevant in the current times.Struggling with internal emotions can lead to engaging in activities like sports, in this case track and field.International performance in sports can be a way to make a mark on the world.It is important to provide athletes with the mental health support required to process their feelings.

    Exploring the Power of Self-Awareness

    Self-awareness is key to understanding our emotions and responding to our environment.We need to be patient with ourselves in order to process our feelings and make decisions.It is important to take the time to reflect on our experiences and feelings.We need to be aware of the external influences on our thoughts and feelings.It is important to have the space to be honest with ourselves and our emotions.Active listening and attentive questioning can help us to better understand our emotions and experiences.

    Unlocking Empathy and Support Through Therapy

    Therapy provides a unique experience where someone is listening attentively and skillfully to your thoughts and feelings.Everyone can relate to the pressure of having to excel at something as a young person, whether it's a sport, dance, or other activity.Talking to a therapist is different than talking to friends or family because the focus is solely on the person seeking help.Therapists provide an empathetic relationship and listen to what is being said without imposing their own perspective.Such an environment allows for someone to express what they need without distraction or judgement.This can be a powerful tool for those seeking guidance and support to help them through difficult times.

    Uncovering the Reality of Racial Inequality & Staying Safe

    It is important to have conversations with people of different races to better understand each other.Therapy isn't always accessible for everyone, but it is possible to make it more affordable and easier to access.People of color often have to face situations that remind them that the world isn't always fair.Breonna Taylor's experience of being in her own home, in her own bed and still facing danger, shows this reality.Even when people are doing their best to make sure they are safe, they may not be seen in the right light.It is important to get to know neighbors and be aware of how to present oneself in different situations to stay safe.

    Can We Find Hope and Empowerment in the Face of Adversity?

    It can be difficult for people to navigate their surroundings when their skin color can be perceived negatively.Even in our own homes, we can sometimes feel unsafe and on edge.But we can find motivation and hope in the people around us, and the stories we tell.We can look to those who have achieved success, and those who use their art to tell stories which break stereotypes.We can take strength in the knowledge that we are not alone, and that together we can be a light in a dark world.We can use our experiences to become a beacon of hope and empowerment in the face of adversity.

    Unlocking the Power of Breath and Sound Healing

    1) We can feel immense pressure to be our best selves, and to share our light with the world, but it can be difficult at times.2) We can develop skills to help us through the difficult times, such as taking a deep breath and grounding ourself.3) We can also look to our loves and family for support, as well as understanding that we are all connected.4) We can learn mindfulness and sound healing through spaces such as wellness brands.5) We can also make active decisions to relax our body and take a moment to breath.6) Through understanding different cultures and their connection to the same instrument, we can understand the importance of the breath and how it can benefit us.

    Embracing Life's Active Learning Experience

    Reflecting on yourself, your experiences, and your strengths is important for personal growth.We can learn from the experiences of others and from our own experiences in the world.Life is an active learning experience and we should use the beauty we find to inspire and move others.We should strive to help our community and use our skills to make a difference.Even if we have achieved success, there is still work to be done and we should ask ourselves what more can be done.Healthy reflection is essential and can help us better understand ourselves and our ideas.

    Recognizing Our Experiences To Create Change

    1) Therapy can be a safe space to nurture your sense of self, discover your values and explore the topics that matter to you.2) It can also be a place to process and reflect on things that have happened in the past and how they relate to the present.3) We can learn from wise words of our elders, such as ‘Don't wait until you are hungry to eat’4) It is important to recognize that the issues in life are what they are, but it is our relationship to them that can be positive or negative.5) We can use our experiences to be a candle in the dark, to create change and shift the space around us.6) It is possible to leave the world better than we found it.

    Can Intersectionality Help Us Find Belonging?

    I have a very ethnic name and have experienced the feeling of being a foreigner even though I was born and raised in the same country.This has made me search for a sense of belonging and shaped who I am.In my profession of mental health, I am still often in the minority and have to prove myself.When I'm in a one-on-one therapy session, there is less pressure and I feel accepted.Intersectionality can help people understand different plights.Growing up in Jamaica, I saw successful people who looked like me and this gave me confidence.

    Unlocking Your Potential: A Journey of Growth With Supportive Teachers

    1) Everyone needs a teacher to help them learn and grow.2) I was lucky to have teachers who were supportive and encouraging.3) After I left school, I noticed that I did not have a black teacher in my master's program.4) I learned that even if something seems impossible, it can still be achieved if you are intentional, creative, and mindful.5) Therapy helped me to understand my emotions and mental health, giving me strength to help others.6) Everyone has the capacity to learn and develop a toolkit, but they need access to resources and support to truly thrive.

    Unlocking Authenticity and Progress in Self and Society

    It is important to be thankful for the blessings you have in life and to strive for integration of all aspects of your self.Being authentic and comfortable in your own skin is key to being a person you want to be around.We all need to make progress both individually and collectively.Personal growth and the growth of society are connected.If we care about ourselves, we will care about our kids and their school, town, and city.Taking time to invest in ourselves and our self-care will lead to a better society for all.

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    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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    36:33 Being Present While on the Edge
    44:48 Any Moment Could Be Your Last
    45:43 The Deepest Mirror You’ll Ever Have
    48:58 What Did You Learn from Your Past Relationships?
    51:22 Introducing Buddhism Practice to My Kids
    55:33 Whatever You’re Saying, You Become
    01:02:22 Loving the Parenting Journey
    01:07:16 The Impacts of Your Decisions
    01:09:13 Opportunities Through Obstacles
    01:17:40 Buddhism Is My Anchor
    01:18:59 The Fear You’re Currently Overcoming
    01:26:04 Orlando Bloom on Final Five

    Episode Resources:

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    4 Ways to Know if It Is Time To End Your Relationship (When the Signs Are Not Clear and Things are Not Bad)

    4 Ways to Know if It Is Time To End Your Relationship (When the Signs Are Not Clear and Things are Not Bad)

    Do you find yourself often thinking about breaking up?

    Do you and your partner have unresolved conflicts that keep resurfacing?

    In this episode, Jay tackles the tough emotions and uncertainty many face when considering a breakup. He talks about why people stay in or leave relationships, touching on key factors like emotional closeness, personal investment, and the impact of family responsibilities. Jay also discusses how to ensure emotional security and the risks of staying for financial reasons or out of obligation. 

    In this episode you’ll learn:

    How to recognize emotional investment

    How to assess emotional security

    How to consider financial implications

    How to navigate emotional intimacy

    This honest conversation provides you with the insights to evaluate your relationship more clearly, helping you decide whether to work on it or move on, based on a deeper understanding of your feelings and the relationship's dynamics.

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    00:00 Intro

    01:10 When to End Your Relationship

    04:48 10 Reason Why People Stay in a Relationship

    12:44 Top 10 Reasons to Leave Your Relationship

    18:14 The Three Cancers of the Mind

    24:44 Difference in Scorecard Perspective

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.