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    In Sight - Exposing Narcissism

    Katie and Helen answer your questions about narcissism, parentification and emotional abuse. Empowering growth through psychoeducation, breaking the cycle one podcast at a time.
    enHelen Villiers & Katie McKenna124 Episodes

    Episodes (124)

    123. Why Do I Need To Fix It?

    123. Why Do I Need To Fix It?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    A move back to the family farm soon becomes a nightmare for this week's listener. She describes her demanding mother in law causing a scene at birthday parties, arriving unannounced in a fit of anger and refusing to listen to reason. Despite her husband reaching the end of his tether and cutting ties, our listener asks why she's the one wanting to fix things for the sake of her children.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    122. What about all the good things she's done for me?

    122. What about all the good things she's done for me?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    TW: Violence

    To those on the outside, our listener's mother has always been the generous, kind and loving parent that's been unfairly denied access to her precious grandchildren. But dig deeper and there's a lifetime of shaming, gaslighting and even excusing physical abuse. Our listener has been given expensive gifts, huge public displays and fancy holidays, but what's the true cost to her and her family?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    121. How To Protect Your Children - The Legal Queen, Part 2

    121. How To Protect Your Children - The Legal Queen, Part 2

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    Family law solicitor Tracey Moloney AKA The Legal Queen joins us on the podcast again this week, this time we're talking about children and grandparents. Do "grandparents' rights" exist? And how can a child be protected from manipulation at the hands of a bitter ex-partner?

    Find The Legal Queen on TikTok.

    Note: Tracey specialises in English and Welsh law only, and this episode does not constitute legal advice.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    120. Protecting Yourself - The Legal Queen, Part 1

    120. Protecting Yourself - The Legal Queen, Part 1

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    From spotting insidious emotional abuse in the courtroom to surviving divorce proceedings against a narcissist, we're hearing practical guidance and legal insights from family law solicitor Tracey Moloney AKA The Legal Queen! 

    This week we're focusing on how to protect yourself during divorce and separation, but fear not - Tracey returns next week to chat about the rights around children and grandparents.

    Find The Legal queen on TikTok.

    Note: Tracey specialises in English and Welsh law only, and this episode does not constitute legal advice.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    119. Do I Have to Lose Everyone?

    119. Do I Have to Lose Everyone?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    TW: child loss, sexual assault

    This week our listener describes living in the shadow of her stillborn sister, as the "replacement child" that didn't stand a chance in a toxic household. Between manipulation and weaponising her disability, her mother has continued to spread the narrative that our listener is volatile, cruel and hateful. She asks if by going no contact, does she really have to lose the family connection she craves?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    118. How Do I Protect My Sister?

    118. How Do I Protect My Sister?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    Our listener begins to spot red flags in her brother-in-law's behaviour, including massive invasions of privacy and public shaming of their children. She's worried his ultra-religious views and need for control have not only traumatised his wife, but her children are at risk too. Our listener asks if her sister is somehow enabling his abuse, and more importanly how can she protect her?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on..

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    117. How Do I Deal With The Anger?

    117. How Do I Deal With The Anger?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    Desperate for closure after a string of abusive relationships throughout her life, our listener can't help but cling on to rage and even hatred towards those who wronged her. As acknowledgment and atonement grow ever more unlikely, she asks how to deal with the hurt and anger.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    116. Why Can’t I Cry?

    116. Why Can’t I Cry?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    After a nasty outburst on a family holiday, our listener this week is struggling with words from her mother that can’t be unsaid. As the insults chip away at her self-esteem, examples of toxic behaviour in childhood bubble to the surface and she’s questioning everything she thought she knew about her role in the family. But is she really unlovable, a bad mother, and ‘broken’?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    TW: This episode talks about sexual abuse.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    115. Should I Confront Her?

    115. Should I Confront Her?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    Our listener this week recalls a family conversation about her grandmother’s toxic behaviour. However, her mother is oblivious to how she displayed the same behaviour, and the lasting effects it had on our listener. Despite her mother’s difficult relationship with alcohol and emotional manipulation, our listener doesn’t want to rock the boat by saying how she’s feeling and asks, can there ever be healing in confrontation?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    114. Can I Protect Myself & Keep My Siblings?

    114. Can I Protect Myself & Keep My Siblings?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    Growing up in the shadow of her siblings, our listener has recognised the toxic traits that were always excused and enabled. Despite going low contact, she's struggling with the idea of giving up on her siblings when she's been taught that "family is everything". Can a relationship with her siblings be salvaged, and should it?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    113. Mother in Law + Trauma = Smothering. What Do I Do?

    113. Mother in Law + Trauma = Smothering. What Do I Do?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    Our listener this week shares how her kind and generous mother-in-law is "the nicest person you could ever wish to meet", with an enticing ability to keep the peace. But digging deeper, it appears there's so much more to her fawning and people-pleasing behaviour. As worry and exhaustion bubble to the surface, our listener asks how she can protect someone that doesn't believe they deserve protecting?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    112. Is My Mother Toxic or Am I Being Unfair?

    112. Is My Mother Toxic or Am I Being Unfair?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    TW: Pregnancy loss

    Despite a history of cold, abusive behaviour from her mother leading to a trail of broken family bonds, our listener is haunted by the notion that 'life is short'. She is questioning whether she was right to go low contact, or will she regret her decision in the future?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    111. YNTP Book Launch

    111. YNTP Book Launch

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UKUS (affiliate links)

    This week we break from the usual format to talk about one of the most surreal weeks we've had, embarking on a whistlestop media tour of Ireland to launch YNTP! Plus, we make In Sight history as we are actually recording in the same room for the first time - catch the video on YouTube!

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    110. Can a Narcissist Change?

    110. Can a Narcissist Change?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    As her father prepares to reconcile with her abusive mother, our listener feels like she's at breaking point. Her father begs her to put their differences aside for a family wedding, but she can't put her mental health at risk again. For the sake of her father she asks whether a narcissist is capable of change, or is this yet another spin on their Merry-Go-Round relationship?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

     

    109. Interview with Harriet Shearsmith - The Book!

    109. Interview with Harriet Shearsmith - The Book!

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    This week we chat with previous guest Harriet Shearsmith, author and host of Unfollowing Mum. After Harriet's exclusive early access to 'You're Not the Problem', we hear how the book has impacted her, what she's learned from it and how things have been since we last caught up!

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    Find Harriet on Instagram.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com

     

    108. When is a golden child not a golden child?

    108. When is a golden child not a golden child?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    This week we're sharing one of the most popular episodes of our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. As part of our series examining family roles, we take an in-depth look at the child that ISN'T the golden child. We explore the background and the ramifications of this role - enjoy!

    Content warning: mention of medical procedures/pain

     

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com

    107. Why Can't I Communicate With My Husband?

    107. Why Can't I Communicate With My Husband?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    This week our listener explains that no matter the situation or her part in it, she always feels like the problem. She describes her husband as a good man with a warm heart, but struggles to communicate with him in a way that helps him understand her needs. She asks, is it simply different love languages, or something else? 

    Content warning: mention of suicide attempt

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com

    106. The Invisible Man

    106. The Invisible Man

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    This week our listener struggles to come to terms with how differently he is treated compared to his sibling. Despite his brother leaving a trail of chaos and personal attacks, their parents seem to do everything they can to avoid holding him accountable. Our listener asks, what happens now?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

    105. How Do I Make Peace with My Past?

    105. How Do I Make Peace with My Past?

    PRE ORDER 'YOU'RE NOT THE PROBLEM' HERE! AMAZON UKAMAZON US (affiliate links)

    For our bonus show The Freudian Slip and to support us please go to our Patreon

    Content warning: sexual abuse 

    This week our listener describes how she managed to break free from a life dominated by her abusive father under the guise of religion. Despite breaking free, she found herself at the mercy of abusive relationships and being silenced by her enabling mother. As she tries to move forward, she asks how to make peace with the traumatic events of her past.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing new cookbook Enjoy here now!

    In Sight's Amazon Store!

    For news, tips and tricks, sign up to the newsletter here :)

    We now have Instagram! Click here to follow, and send messages to be read on the show.

    And to submit your own question, please visit https://insightpodcast.com/podcast/#submit-your-letter

    104. Can I make it on my own?

    104. Can I make it on my own?

    PRE ORDER 'YOU'RE NOT THE PROBLEM' HERE! AMAZON UK, AMAZON US (affiliate links)

    For our bonus show The Freudian Slip and to support us please go to our Patreon

    This week our listener is questioning whether her husband is emotionally abusive, or are the wounds of her childhood blurring the lines? After years of control and debilitating illness, our listener asks if she should leave - and can she make it on her own if she does?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing new cookbook Enjoy here now!

    In Sight's Amazon Store!

    For news, tips and tricks, sign up to the newsletter here :)

    We now have Instagram! Click here to follow, and send messages to be read on the show.

    And to submit your own question, please visit https://insightpodcast.com/podcast/#submit-your-letter

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