healthy connections

Welcome back to The Viall Files! Today we have another special “where are they now” update show where we give you updates from our past callers to see what’s happened in their situations and relationships since appearing on the show. 

We bring on our first caller who had originally called in regarding a text requesting a “romantic tryst” with her, but has since started to date women and exhibit some toxic dating habits. We find out if she’s still leaning into the drama, or if she’s begun intentionally dating. Our second caller had first called in because her ex-situationship worked out at her gym, and she was having a hard time letting go. We discover if she’s finally found a new gym, or if she couldn’t work out healthier dating choices. Our third caller who was debating telling her friend she had feelings for him before he moved out of the country. We find out what his response was and the status of their relationship now. 

We also have some written updates - Our caller who’d been Instagram DM’ing someone, but wasn’t sure how to take it further, our caller who had a threesome where everyone caught feelings, and our caller who was unsure of how to break-up with her boyfriend of 4 years. 

To catch up on all of these callers original questions please see the show numbers:  

Original Episode numbers for callers:

• Episode Number: 630 Ask Nick Updates Special Episode - Part 11, 575 Ask Nick Updates Special Episode - Part 7, (First appeared on Ep545 Francesca Farago - Likable Villain Gone Bad)

• Episode Number: 588 Ask Nick Updates Special Episode - Part 8, 562 Ask Nick Updates Special Episode - Part 6, (First appeared on Ep537 Ask Nick - There’s No Medal For Staying Friends)

• Episode Number: 637 Ask Nick - My Boyfriend’s Emotional Affair With His Cousin

 Original Episode numbers for written updates:

• Episode Number: Ep636 Going Deeper with Wells Adams - It’s a Girl, Bachelor Weddings, and Joe vs. Sophie

• Episode Number: Ep640 Ask Nick - Everyone Caught Feelings During Threesome

• Episode Number: 604 Ask Nick Updates Special Episode - Part 9 (First appearance on Ep592 Ask Nick - I Need To Stop My Soulmate’s Wedding)

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Love and attachment feel very similar, and it's very easy to confuse the two especially in the early stages of dating when we are overwhelmed by infatuation and the novelty of a new relationship. However, they are very different. Whilst love is a deliberate choice, mutual, selflessness, and long lasting, attachment is unconscious, can be one-sided and based on what serves our needs. Confusing these two feelings can cause us to pursue the wrong people, invest too quickly and, at times, end up hurt and disappointed. Today we're going to explore how to tell the difference, why we need to protect ourselves from getting attached too quickly, especially when we are prone to fantasy bonding or bread crumbing, and how to detach and let that bond develop slowly. We're also going to talk about the 6 questions we can use to answer the question: am I in love, or am I just attached? Listen now! 

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