Logo

    How to Quit Being a Nice-aholic

    enMay 26, 2023

    About this Episode

    This episode is brought to you by InsideTracker and Athletic Greens.


    For many of us, it can be a challenge to express what we really think, even in our most important relationships, because we seek to avoid conflict or disappointment. Unfortunately, this approach takes us further away from dealing with the real situation and we end up unhappy and suffering the consequences. I know because I, myself, used to be a “nice-aholic.”


    In today’s episode of my series I’m calling Health Bites, I share discrete action steps my coach taught me that enabled me to just take a deep breath, get clear about what I wanted, and tell the truth in a clear, honest way. I also discuss simple steps to having a difficult conversation.


    This episode is brought to you by InsideTracker and Athletic Greens.


    InsideTracker is a personalized health and wellness platform like no other. Right now they’re offering my community 20% off at insidetracker.com/drhyman.


    AG1 contains 75 high-quality vitamins, minerals, whole-food sourced superfoods, probiotics, and adaptogens to support your entire body. Right now, Athletic Greens is offering 10 FREE travel packs with your first purchase by visiting athleticgreens.com/hyman.


    Here are more details from our interview (audio version / Apple Subscriber version):

    • My personal history of people-pleasing (3:49 / 1:24) 
    • Practicing healthy and effective communication (6:59 / 4:32) 
    • Active listening (8:20 / 5:45) 
    • How to approach a difficult conversation (9:25 / 7:27) 


    Mentioned in This Episode

    Nonviolent Communication

    Conscious Communication

    Practice Active Listening




    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.


    🔑 Key Takeaways

    • Strive for authentic relationships by learning to tell the truth with love, understanding the root cause of people pleasing, and taking small steps towards change. Don't try to control others' emotions and reactions through manipulation.
    • Practice nonviolent communication, mental preparation, and saying "no" kindly to improve relationships and overcome patterns holding back honest communication.
    • Approach difficult conversations with curiosity, listen deeply and don't have a preconceived narrative. Being in a relationship is more important than being right. Speak honestly, but also be mindful of softening the truth.
    • Start by asking for a good time, remain positive and understanding, take responsibility for your actions, and avoid blame or judgment. Engage in active listening, draw on your inner wisdom, guide conversation with a script, collaborate and be willing to make mistakes.
    • Building healthy relationships requires effective communication. Listen actively, understand perspectives, and approach discussions as a team with a shared goal. Develop communication skills, practice kindness, and focus on learning and growing together.

    📝 Podcast Summary

    The Negative Impact of Being a People Pleaser and How to Overcome It

    Being a people pleaser can affect the quality of our lives, our relationships, and our effectiveness. It's important to learn how to tell the truth and avoid people pleasing to have an authentic relationship based on truth. Though it can be challenging, it's a skill that can be learned. People pleasing is a manipulative way of controlling others' emotions and reactions. It's important to understand the root cause of being a nice aholic and work on it. Telling the truth with love is the key to having authentic relationships. Being mean is not the solution, but rather telling the truth with love. Small steps taken in life can have a big impact over time.

    Overcoming People-Pleasing Behavior for Effective Communication

    Learning how to deal with people-pleasing behavior is important in order to face the reality of difficult conversations with honesty and grace. Practicing the techniques repeatedly and doing mental, physical, and emotional preparation for the conversation can help in communicating in a healthy way. It is essential to learn how to say 'no' with kindness and wisdom, and to accept the consequences that come along. Non-Violent Communication and books like Difficult Conversations can help in this regard. By avoiding people-pleasing and learning how to have honest conversations, individuals can reset the patterns that hold them back and communicate in a way that is honest, effective, and gracefully delivered.

    How to Have Difficult Conversations

    Having difficult conversations is really important and it's easier when you frame it in the right way, when you start in the right way. You don't have to agree to actually have a relationship with someone. Inquiring about what someone's feeling, listening deeply and expressing back to them what you heard helps people to shift into a more relaxed, calm state. It's not necessarily about lying. It could be omission, it could be softening the truth. So, talking to someone straight and telling the truth is way better than not. You either can be in relationship or you can be right. In short, be curious about the other person's experience, listen deeply and don't have a narrative in your head.

    How to Approach Difficult Conversations with Confidence and Clarity

    When approaching a difficult conversation, start by asking for a good time to talk. Begin with positivity, understanding their perspective, and taking responsibility for your own actions. Avoid blame or judgment and focus on sharing your own experience and perspective while allowing space for the other person to share theirs. Engage in active listening and ask for their perspective. Draw on your higher self and wisdom, rather than being controlled by negative inner dialogue. When necessary, it can be helpful to prepare a script to guide the conversation. Approach the conversation as a collaborative effort to improve the relationship, and be willing to make mistakes and start over again.

    The Importance of Effective Communication in Building Strong Relationships.

    Effective communication is the foundation of healthy and strong relationships, both personal and professional. Listening to and understanding the perspective of the other person is crucial in resolving conflicts and creating agreements. It's important to approach discussions as a team with a shared goal and work towards it as a united front. Learning communication skills through resources like nonviolent and conscious communication courses and practicing active listening can help develop deeper connections and diffuse any situation. Making an effort to improve communication and nurturing relationships is essential for a good life, and it all starts with giving yourself and others kindness. Don't be afraid to make mistakes, instead focus on learning and growing together.

    Recent Episodes from The Doctor's Farmacy with Mark Hyman, M.D.

    Unlocking the Secrets to Longevity: Sharing Insights into My Daily Diet, Fitness, and Lifestyle Routines

    Unlocking the Secrets to Longevity: Sharing Insights into My Daily Diet, Fitness, and Lifestyle Routines
    View the Show Notes From This Episode Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal I'm turning 65 this year and feel younger, fitter, and more vibrant than ever. Thanks to my longevity routine, I’ve been able to reverse my biological age by 20 years, plus an additional year in the past five months alone! As I grow older, I’ve learned that what’s possible when we nourish our bodies, get regular exercise, quality sleep, and manage our stress – we can effectively turn back our biological clock. Add a supplement stack and hormetic stressors to activate our longevity switches, and you’re setting a solid foundation for lasting health. So, how does someone in their 60s build muscle and sport abs that could rival their younger selves?  In today’s Health Bites episode, I’m sharing the exclusive details behind my longevity routine that anyone can try on their journey towards a healthier, longer life. Whether you want to sharpen your mind, enhance your physique, or simply feel younger, this episode is for you. Remember, it’s not just about adding years to your life, but life to your years.  In this episode, I discuss: My morning routine for longevity (2:46) How I get the benefits of exercise in minimal time (3:23) A look at the ingredients in my Healthy Aging Shake (5:54) What I eat in a day (lunch and dinner) to support longevity (11:46) The role of dietary protein for longevity and how much to eat every day(15:03) How to activate your longevity switches using the power of hormesis (23:00) Top tips for active relaxation and rejuvenation (28:51) My nightly routine for sleep optimization (30:01) The supplement I take for optimal health and longevity (32:01) Why lab testing is crucial for longevity and optimal health (33:31) Personal experience and experimentation with advanced longevity therapeutics (36:55) This episode is brought to you by Timeline Nutrition and Cymbiotika. Support essential mitochondrial health and save 10% on Mitopure. Visit TimelineNutrition.com/Drhyman and use code DRHYMAN10. Upgrade your supplement routine with Cymbiotika. Get 20% off with free shipping on all orders. Head to Cymbiotika.com and use code HYMAN.

    Ozempic: A Weight Loss Miracle or Metabolic Menace? A Discussion with Dr. Tyna Moore & Calley Means

    Ozempic: A Weight Loss Miracle or Metabolic Menace? A Discussion with Dr. Tyna Moore & Calley Means
    View the Show Notes From This Episode Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal Like most things in life, when it comes to optimizing metabolic health, a nuanced perspective can help. Rather than viewing it as a black-and-white issue, we can take into consideration the big-picture social context we’re facing that encourages ultra-processed foods, obesity, and lifelong medication as well as the micro-level of what people are experiencing as individuals and understanding how to help them when all else fails. Today I’m thrilled to sit down with Dr. Tyna Moore and Calley Means for a grounded discussion that explores both sides of the spectrum, and everything in between.  In this episode, we discuss: The controversial discussion of GLP-1 agonists like Ozempic, weighing the pros and cons of these new drugs in treating obesity and metabolic crises (3:34) Challenging the notion of treating obesity with drugs like Ozempic (10:35) An unsettling revelation about the push for using Ozempic in children (12:04) Digging deeper into GLP-1 research and some of the benefits (32:51) Why are children being born metabolically challenged? (41:11) Dr. Moore’s approach to using peptides with her patients and for her own crippling pain, and what they’ve seen (45:19) How our current healthcare system lacks policies and support for behavior change (1:27) While there are always differing views, we know for sure that our food and drug policies aren’t serving the best interests of creating sustainable, empowered health for the masses. I hope you’ll tune in to hear more from this comprehensive and lively discussion.  This episode is brought to you by Rupa Health, Pendulum, ARMRA Colostrum, and One Skin. Streamline your lab orders with Rupa Health. Access more than 3,000 specialty lab tests and register for a FREE live demo at RupaHealth.com. Pendulum is offering listeners 20% off their first month’s subscription of Akkermansia for gut health. Visit PendulumLife.com and use code HYMAN. Save 15% on your first order of ARMRA Colostrum and unlock the power of 400+ functional nutrients. Just visit TryARMRA.com/Mark or use code MARK. Unlock your healthiest skin yet. Try OneSkin with 15% off your first purchase using code HYMAN15 at OneSkin.co today.

    How To Recover From IBD Without Surgery & Medication

    How To Recover From IBD Without Surgery & Medication
    View the Show Notes From This Episode Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal Gas, bloating, constipation, diarrhea, urgency, and painful cramping—these are just some of the many difficult symptoms that come along with inflammatory bowel disease, also known as IBD. This disorder is an umbrella term for a variety of symptoms and diagnoses, including ulcerative colitis and Crohn’s disease, and it impacts millions of Americans each day. In this episode, Dr. Hyman speaks with Dr. George Papanicolaou, Dr. Miguel Reguiro, and Dr. Shilpa Ravella about the Functional Medicine approach to reducing symptoms of IBD that extend beyond medications and surgery. This episode is brought to you by Rupa Health and LMNT. Streamline your lab orders with Rupa Health. Access more than 3,000 specialty lab tests and register for a FREE live demo at RupaHealth.com. LMNT is giving listeners a FREE eight-count sample pack of their vital electrolyte drink mix with any purchase. Just visit DrinkLMNT.com/Hyman today.

    Why the Last Thing You Should Ever Eat is Ultra Processed Foods: It Kills 11 Million People a Year

    Why the Last Thing You Should Ever Eat is Ultra Processed Foods: It Kills 11 Million People a Year

    View the Show Notes From This Episode


    Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman


    Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal


    In the health space, we hear the term ultra-processed foods thrown around often for its clear link to chronic diseases such as depression, Alzheimer’s, and diabesity. But what exactly does “ultra-processed” mean? How can you tell if a food is ultra-processed?


    In today’s Health Bites episode, we will learn exactly what ultra-processed foods are, how to identify them, their impact on human health, and the global economy. We’ll also discuss tips and tricks for how to read food labels to better navigate the grocery store, and the innovations happening in Washington to develop label laws that helps protect the consumer.


    In this episode, I discuss:

    • Definition, examples, and deceptive health claims of ultra-processed food (2:06) 
    • Health risks and impacts of ultra-processed food (7:30) 
    • Case study: impact of an ultra-processed diet on twin girls (10:00) 
    • History and rise of processed food (12:09) 
    • Difference between ultra-processed and minimally processed foods (17:45) 
    • Impact of food packaging and additives on health (24:01) 
    • Economic and societal consequences of chronic diseases caused by poor diet (28:04) 
    • Identifying ultra-processed foods and understanding food labeling (35:00) 
    • Avoiding ultra-processed foods and using food scoring systems (40:50) 


    This episode is brought to you by Rupa Health, Essentia, and Cymbiotika.


    Streamline your lab orders with Rupa Health. Access more than 3,000 specialty lab tests and register for a FREE live demo at RupaHealth.com.


    Receive an extra $100 off your mattress purchase! Go to myessentia.com/drmarkhyman and use code HYMAN at checkout to get this great deal.


    Upgrade your supplement routing with Cymbiotika. Get 20% off with free shipping on all orders. Head to Cymbiotika.com and use code HYMAN.



    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.


    Why the Last Thing You Should Ever Eat is Ultra Processed Foods: It Kills 11 Million People a Year

    Why the Last Thing You Should Ever Eat is Ultra Processed Foods: It Kills 11 Million People a Year
    View the Show Notes From This Episode Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal In the health space, we hear the term ultra-processed foods thrown around often for its clear link to chronic diseases such as depression, Alzheimer’s, and diabesity. But what exactly does “ultra-processed” mean? How can you tell if a food is ultra-processed? In today’s Health Bites episode, we will learn exactly what ultra-processed foods are, how to identify them, their impact on human health, and the global economy. We’ll also discuss tips and tricks for how to read food labels to better navigate the grocery store, and the innovations happening in Washington to develop label laws that helps protect the consumer. In this episode, I discuss: Definition, examples, and deceptive health claims of ultra-processed food (2:06)  Health risks and impacts of ultra-processed food (7:30)  Case study: impact of an ultra-processed diet on twin girls (10:00)  History and rise of processed food (12:09)  Difference between ultra-processed and minimally processed foods (17:45)  Impact of food packaging and additives on health (24:01)  Economic and societal consequences of chronic diseases caused by poor diet (28:04)  Identifying ultra-processed foods and understanding food labeling (35:00)  Avoiding ultra-processed foods and using food scoring systems (40:50)  This episode is brought to you by Rupa Health, Essentia, and Cymbiotika. Streamline your lab orders with Rupa Health. Access more than 3,000 specialty lab tests and register for a FREE live demo at RupaHealth.com. Receive an extra $100 off your mattress purchase! Go to myessentia.com/drmarkhyman and use code HYMAN at checkout to get this great deal. Upgrade your supplement routing with Cymbiotika. Get 20% off with free shipping on all orders. Head to Cymbiotika.com and use code HYMAN.

    The Surprising Causes of Autism & Why It's On The Rise

    The Surprising Causes of Autism & Why It's On The Rise

    View the Show Notes From This Episode


    Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman


    Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal


    The prevalence of autism has risen a shocking 400% in the last twenty years. Increased awareness and diagnosis are one piece, but there are also so many other factors to consider. The hopeful news is that we’re seeing a shift paradigm in how we view and treat autism, with some truly amazing improvements possible. I’m thrilled to welcome Dr. Suzanna Goh, a board-certified pediatric behavioral neurologist, behavioral analyst, neuroscience researcher, Rhodes scholar, and author.


    In this episode, we discuss:


    • Shaking things up around the autism paradigm (1:57)
    • The connection between the brain and mitochondria (6:04)
    • Can autism be reversed? (7:00)
    • The biggest mistake made in autism (10:10)
    • What creates the inflammatory fire in the autistic brain? (15:20)
    • The role of diet in autism treatment (19:17)
    • Functional tests for assessing brain function and how to best support kids with autism (26:30)
    • Mitochondrial dysfunction and autism (28:30)
    • "Magnificent Minds" - A book on autism by Dr. Suzanne Goh (34:57)


    Using a whole-child approach and investigating the intricate connections between metabolism, mitochondrial function, and nutrition we can better understand what types of support autistic children need most. I hope you’ll listen in to learn more. 


    This episode is brought to you by Rupa Health, AG1, and Essentia.


    Streamline your lab orders with Rupa Health. Access more than 3,000 specialty lab tests and register for a FREE live demo at RupaHealth.com.


    Get your daily serving of vitamins, minerals, adaptogens, and more with AG1. Head to DrinkAG1.com/Hyman and get a years worth of D3 and 5 Travel Packs for FREE with your first order.


    Receive an extra $100 off your mattress purchase! Go to myessentia.com/drmarkhyman to get this great deal.



    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.


    The Surprising Causes of Autism & Why It's On The Rise

    The Surprising Causes of Autism & Why It's On The Rise
    View the Show Notes From This Episode Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal The prevalence of autism has risen a shocking 400% in the last twenty years. Increased awareness and diagnosis are one piece, but there are also so many other factors to consider. The hopeful news is that we’re seeing a shift paradigm in how we view and treat autism, with some truly amazing improvements possible. I’m thrilled to welcome Dr. Suzanna Goh, a board-certified pediatric behavioral neurologist, behavioral analyst, neuroscience researcher, Rhodes scholar, and author. In this episode, we discuss: Shaking things up around the autism paradigm (1:57) The connection between the brain and mitochondria (6:04) Can autism be reversed? (7:00) The biggest mistake made in autism (10:10) What creates the inflammatory fire in the autistic brain? (15:20) The role of diet in autism treatment (19:17) Functional tests for assessing brain function and how to best support kids with autism (26:30) Mitochondrial dysfunction and autism (28:30) "Magnificent Minds" - A book on autism by Dr. Suzanne Goh (34:57) Using a whole-child approach and investigating the intricate connections between metabolism, mitochondrial function, and nutrition we can better understand what types of support autistic children need most. I hope you’ll listen in to learn more.  This episode is brought to you by Rupa Health, AG1, and Essentia. Streamline your lab orders with Rupa Health. Access more than 3,000 specialty lab tests and register for a FREE live demo at RupaHealth.com. Get your daily serving of vitamins, minerals, adaptogens, and more with AG1. Head to DrinkAG1.com/Hyman and get a years worth of D3 and 5 Travel Packs for FREE with your first order. Receive an extra $100 off your mattress purchase! Go to myessentia.com/drmarkhyman to get this great deal.

    Is Your Metabolic Health Suffering? How to Identify Your Weak Metabolism, and How To Fix It

    Is Your Metabolic Health Suffering? How to Identify Your Weak Metabolism, and How To Fix It

    View the Show Notes From This Episode


    Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman


    Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal


    Often, when patients have high cholesterol or high blood pressure, the treatment focus is on statins or anti-hypertensive medications. However, these are just the symptoms of poor metabolic health, which requires a closer look at the root cause and a treatment model that reflects that.


    In this episode, Dr. Hyman speaks with Dr. Elizabeth Boham and Dr. George Papanicolaou about our lifestyle choices that affect our cholesterol levels, blood pressure, and waist circumference.


    This episode is brought to you by Rupa University, AG1, and Momentous.


    Rupa University is hosting FREE classes and bootcamps for healthcare providers who want to learn more about Functional Medicine testing. Sign up at RupaUniversity.com.


    Get your daily serving of vitamins, minerals, adaptogens, and more with AG1. Head to DrinkAG1.com/Hyman and get 10 FREE travel packs + FREE Welcome Kit with your first order.


    Head over to livemomentous.com/mark for 20% off creatine, collagen, and all of their best-in-class products.



    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.


    The Hidden Connection Between Gut Health & Mental Health That Therapy and Drugs Cannot Fix

    The Hidden Connection Between Gut Health & Mental Health That Therapy and Drugs Cannot Fix

    View the Show Notes For This Episode


    Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman


    Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal


    Our global mental health crisis is growing at an exponential rate, with over half a billion people suffering from depression and anxiety; it’s time we rethink our understanding of the underlying root causes of mental health challenges.


    From treating thousands of patients, I’ve learned that depression is not in your head. It’s in your body. More specifically, your gut. When your gut is unhealthy and inflamed, your brain is unhealthy and inflamed. In Functional Medicine, we know that the gut and the brain are intimately connected and that the health of one directly influences the health of the other. 


    In today’s Health Bites episode, we’re diving into the gut-brain connection and sharing Functional Medicine tools to support your gut health and, as a result, your mood and mental health. 


    In this episode, I discuss:

    • Our global mental health crisis (2:45)
    • The gut-brain connection (4:18)
    • The story of Marks's broken brain (5:15)
    • Features of the gut-brain axis (8:57)
    • Gut hormones that send signals to your brain (10:06)
    • Role of the gut microbiota in mood and mental health (12:24)
    • How stress negatively impacts our gut microbiome (20:14)
    • The link between leaky gut and poor mental health (21:41)
    • The Functional Medicine approach to fixing the gut (25:56)
    • The 5R Program for fixing your gut health (30:09)


    This episode is brought to you by AG1 and Rupa Health.


    Get your daily serving of vitamins, minerals, adaptogens, and more with AG1. Head to DrinkAG1.com/Hyman and get 10 FREE travel packs + FREE Welcome Kit with your first order.


    Streamline your lab orders with Rupa Health. Access more than 3,000 specialty lab tests and register for a FREE live demo at RupaHealth.com.



    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.


    The Hidden Connection Between Gut Health & Mental Health That Therapy and Drugs Cannot Fix

    The Hidden Connection Between Gut Health & Mental Health That Therapy and Drugs Cannot Fix
    View the Show Notes For This Episode Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman Sign Up for Dr. Hyman’s Weekly Longevity Journal Our global mental health crisis is growing at an exponential rate, with over half a billion people suffering from depression and anxiety; it’s time we rethink our understanding of the underlying root causes of mental health challenges. From treating thousands of patients, I’ve learned that depression is not in your head. It’s in your body. More specifically, your gut. When your gut is unhealthy and inflamed, your brain is unhealthy and inflamed. In Functional Medicine, we know that the gut and the brain are intimately connected and that the health of one directly influences the health of the other.  In today’s Health Bites episode, we’re diving into the gut-brain connection and sharing Functional Medicine tools to support your gut health and, as a result, your mood and mental health.  In this episode, I discuss: Our global mental health crisis (2:45) The gut-brain connection (4:18) The story of Marks's broken brain (5:15) Features of the gut-brain axis (8:57) Gut hormones that send signals to your brain (10:06) Role of the gut microbiota in mood and mental health (12:24) How stress negatively impacts our gut microbiome (20:14) The link between leaky gut and poor mental health (21:41) The Functional Medicine approach to fixing the gut (25:56) The 5R Program for fixing your gut health (30:09) This episode is brought to you by AG1 and Rupa Health. Get your daily serving of vitamins, minerals, adaptogens, and more with AG1. Head to DrinkAG1.com/Hyman and get 10 FREE travel packs + FREE Welcome Kit with your first order. Streamline your lab orders with Rupa Health. Access more than 3,000 specialty lab tests and register for a FREE live demo at RupaHealth.com.