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    7 Keys to Lasting Love (& Attracting a Healthy Relationship) | Lewis Howes

    enFebruary 12, 2024

    Podcast Summary

    • Creating Lasting Love Through Conscious Effort and Self-ReflectionChoosing a partner from a place of wholeness and healing, rather than fear or anxiousness, is essential to developing a conscious relationship that supports personal growth and enables individuals to thrive in all areas of life.

      Lasting love requires conscious effort and self-reflection. Lewis Howes shares how his own struggles in relationships led him to study human dynamics and experiment with different approaches. He emphasizes the importance of choosing a partner from a place of wholeness and healing, rather than from fear or anxiousness. Through the seven Keys to Lasting Love, he explains how to develop and create a conscious relationship that thrives, rather than simply surviving. The goal is to create a harmonious and peaceful environment that supports personal growth and the manifestation of dreams. This type of relationship, built on acceptance and support, acts as the highest form of currency and enables individuals to thrive in all areas of their life.

    • The Path to Lasting Love: Self-Work and Self-LoveLasting love requires self-work and self-love. Embracing our flaws, rewiring our beliefs, and choosing love despite the risks are crucial steps towards healthier relationships and a beautiful life.

      Lasting love requires self-work. It's not about finding someone to rescue us from our past wounds and traumas, but about turning around and facing ourselves. We must embrace the parts of us that we don't like and start rewiring our beliefs and thinking patterns. This work is essential to creating a healthier relationship with ourselves and attracting the ideal partner. Love doesn't come easily without the work, but when we do the work, we become a magnet for love and possibilities. We must be discerning in choosing a partner who aligns with our values, vision, and lifestyle. Additionally, we need to overcome our fears of intimacy, inadequacy, and abandonment, and choose love despite the risks. Ultimately, self-love is crucial for experiencing a beautiful life and successful long-term relationships.

    • The Power of Listening: Building Stronger Connections in RelationshipsEffective communication involves not just speaking, but truly listening. By being genuinely curious and attentive to others, we can build stronger connections and foster lasting relationships.

      Effective communication is the foundation of every relationship, especially in intimacy. It's not just about what you say, but about how well you listen. Most people lack the skill of truly listening, and it's something that even the most experienced communicators still need to work on. Listening goes beyond just hearing the words, it involves observing body language, facial expressions, and understanding what people are not saying. Being a great communicator means becoming the most interested person in the room or in a relationship, being genuinely curious and attentive to others. By honing this skill of listening, we can build stronger connections, understand each other better, and foster thriving, lasting relationships.

    • The Power of Communication and Vulnerability in LoveCommunication, vulnerability, and creating a safe environment are essential for a strong and lasting connection. True courage in love is being authentic and handling situations without resorting to anger or aggression.

      Communication and vulnerability are crucial for lasting love. It's not just about speaking, but also about listening, observing, and being curious. Asking questions and being willing to open up creates a strong connection. Creating a safe environment for vulnerability is important, especially for men who may have been made fun of or shut down in the past. It's essential to allow space for authenticity and expressing true emotions. However, vulnerability shouldn't be forced or pressured, as everyone's journey is different. It takes courage to be vulnerable, as it requires showing up and being seen without control over the outcome. True courage is rising above ego and being strong enough to handle any situation without resorting to anger or aggression.

    • Building a Lasting Relationship: The Key IngredientsPrioritize vulnerability, respect, clear boundaries, and appreciation to build a strong and long-lasting relationship. Show up courageously, establish clear boundaries, and express appreciation to create a healthy and loving bond.

      In order to build a long-lasting and thriving relationship, it is crucial to prioritize vulnerability, respect, clear boundaries, and appreciation. It is about having the courage to show up and be vulnerable without knowing the outcome. Before committing to a partner, ensure that both of you can be vulnerable and open in the initial stages of dating. Respect is essential for acceptance and truly understanding and embracing your partner's values and past. Establish clear boundaries and agreements to maintain respect in the relationship and avoid resentment. Don't be afraid to prioritize yourself and set boundaries, as this is crucial for building a healthy and lasting relationship. Finally, express appreciation and understand your partner's love language to ensure they feel valued and loved.

    • The importance of appreciation and growth in a relationship.Showing appreciation for your partner and committing to personal growth is essential for a long-lasting and thriving relationship.

      Appreciation is key in a long-lasting relationship. Feeling appreciated by your partner is important for both individuals to feel valued and supported. It is essential to show appreciation in ways that the other person can receive and understand. Understanding each other's love language is crucial, as it helps determine how a person feels loved the most. By asking and doing the things that make them feel loved, it brings more joy and a sense of appreciation. Additionally, growth is necessary in a relationship. Both partners need to be willing to grow individually and together. A commitment to personal growth and development ensures the relationship continues to evolve and thrive.

    • Nurturing Individual and Joint Growth in RelationshipsPrioritize personal and relationship growth through a combination of individual and joint strategies, activities, and supports. Quality time, meaningful conversations, adaptability, and flexibility are essential for a strong and connected partnership.

      Successful relationships require both individual and joint growth. It's important to have separate strategies, skill sets, and support systems to develop individually, while also working together to grow as a couple. This involves attending workshops, meditating, getting coaching, going to therapy, and engaging in activities that support personal and relational growth. Quality time together is crucial, but it goes beyond simply watching TV and eating junk food. Scheduling shared experiences sans phones and going on digital detox dates can significantly enhance the bond. Meaningful conversations and mindful activities are also essential for deeper connection and intimacy. Lastly, adaptability and flexibility are key qualities that both partners should possess to navigate changes and unforeseen circumstances in the relationship.

    • Building a Foundation for LoveBeing adaptable, facing insecurities, and embracing ourselves fully are essential steps to creating a strong and fulfilling relationship, ultimately attracting the love and peace we deserve.

      In order to have a healthy, thriving relationship, we need to be adaptable and flexible. Just like parents constantly face unexpected changes and challenges, relationships require us to be there for one another and adapt to whatever situation arises. It's not about compromising or sacrificing, but rather making decisions and choices that create a strong foundation for love. We must remember that we are deserving of love and that we are enough. However, this realization won't happen overnight. It requires doing the deep inner work, facing our insecurities and fears, and embracing ourselves fully. By doing this work, we can attract and experience the love and peace we truly deserve.

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    Why 70% of Relationships End in The First Year w/ Sadia Khan

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    After graduating in psychology and completing masters in developmental psychology Sadia began teaching in inner London schools amongst children of deprived backgrounds. She then went on to teach privileged students in Dubai and noticed not only the economic but psychological advantage wealth provides children when their parents can access therapy. Sadia decided to complete her studies in psychotherapy and decided to post a few videos online mainly to make therapy accessible to those who may struggle to afford it and to make therapy more digestible to those who may not understand the concept. The videos blew up and changed her career path to online therapist, podcaster and content creator racking over 100 million views online.

    In this episode you will learn,

    • The #1 reason why men and women struggle to keep relationships and why narcissistic behaviors are so prevalent in dating today.
    • Why women cheat more than men and the root cause of infidelity.
    • The importance of self control when searching for a long term relationship.
    • Practical advice to enhance your dating confidence, providing you with strategies to feel more self-assured on a first date.
    • Strategies to handle commitment issues, enabling you to navigate this critical phase of relationships and lay the groundwork for a strong and enduring partnership.

    Buy Sadia's book - https://amzn.to/3OVV2me

    For more information go to www.lewishowes.com/1491

    For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960

    Want more relationship episodes like this one?

    Sheleana Aiyana - https://link.chtbl.com/1436-pod

    Lewis Howes solo episode on relationships - 

    https://link.chtbl.com/1450-pod