At Last She Said It

Some topics come up in these podcast conversations again and again, and that gets our attention. They frustrate us but also feel like obvious opportunities: areas where the church we love could take a step forward, and even small changes might make a big difference. In Episode 173, Cynthia and Susan call out a few of their frustrations and imagine possible responses that would feel like real progress.

Talk a lot about guilt and shame and eventually, you'll probably crave a hefty dose of grace! The conversation in Episode 172 is just that. Cynthia and Susan focus on challenges Latter-day Saints might have decoupling works and grace. Is it possible accepting grace actually requires more faith than depending on our own good works? How might pivoting toward grace propel us forward? Good news spoiler: We don’t have to save ourselves!

In Episode 171, Susan and Cynthia continue their discussion with therapist C.A. Larson about guilt and shame. Where are they coming from? What are some specific ways these emotions might affect Latter-day Saint women, and how can we recognize and work through them in healthy ways?

“The most liberating process is to realize that no one’s expectations for my life matter but my own,” says therapist C.A. Larson. In Episode 170, she joins Cynthia and Susan for the first part of a discussion about guilt and shame. What’s the difference between these two emotions? How do they help or hinder our growth and progress? And what tools can we use to manage them in healthy ways, and move toward greater self-acceptance?

“My religious life is beyond the confines of my ward or stake,” says Lisa Torcasso Downing, a Latter-day Saint woman for whom using her voice is an integral part of her faith life. She describes her long-running blog, Life Outside the Book of Mormon Belt: "That's where I’ve been saying it!” In Episode 169, she joins Susan and Cynthia for a rich conversation about everything from her unique conversion story to some of the foundational ideas that shaped her Mormonism to the ups and downs of learning to advocate.

Some questions need to be revisited often so we don’t lose sight of the fact that no satisfactory answer has been given. In Episode 91, Cynthia asked, “If history shows that patriarchy is bad for women, and data shows that girls and women fare better when they can see themselves at every level of leadership in our churches, schools, and societies…why do LDS women and men continue to cling to old ideas that deny history and data?” Unfortunately, her question stands, as little if any progress has been made. In Episode 168 we preface a rerun of this previous conversation with a few of the thoughts we have about it now.

Sometimes it’s good to just have fun! Episode 167 is a peek behind the curtain at ALSSI. Cynthia and Susan turn on the mics for an unscripted chat about everything from podcaster-pet-peeves to “spilled tea” to Christmas traditions. It’s the kind of conversation that’s probably good to publish now and then just to remind ourselves and everyone else: we’re two average LDS women trying to keep it together and figuring stuff out as we go.

Lyric Montgomery Kinard uses the word expansion to describe her faith journey because, as she says, “it feels like spirituality has burst my Mormon box wide-open.” In Episode 166, she joins Susan and Cynthia to talk about her experiences as a Latter-day Saint. It’s another glimpse into the life of a woman who’s given herself permission to walk the path in her own way, honest about what fills her and what doesn’t, and willing to speak her truth.

We asked, you answered! In Bonus Episode 165, women from the ALSSI community share personal experiences and thoughts about Patriarchal Blessings.

When it comes to Patriarchal Blessings, there are as many experiences as there are members who give and receive them. In Episode 164, Cynthia and Susan are joined by Blakelee Ellis for a discussion about some of the many ways these highly anticipated blessings can be complicated for Latter-day Saint women. From the experience itself to the advice given or promises made, there can be plenty to unpack at the time the words are spoken, but also as we continue to revisit the transcript throughout our lives.

The image of the compass feels central to Autumn McAlpin’s book, But Jesus: A Conversation. Autumn explains, “Right now, my spiritual practice is centered on this—I read pure religion as found in the gospels in the New Testament, then try my best to keep up…” In Episode 163, she joins Cynthia and Susan to talk about the journey behind the book, and how her experiences as a mother and Latter-day Saint LGBTQ+ ally continue to shape her commitment to following Jesus and focusing on love.

“I’m tired of putting Jesus in a hermeneutical box nailed together by patriarchal exegesis,” says Kajsa Berlin-Kaufusi. In Episode 162, she joins Cynthia and Susan to discuss what those words mean. What might they mean specifically for Latter-day Saint women as we approach the New Testament with a desire to broaden our scriptural understanding and interpretation? Can we excavate meaning by uncovering and examining biblical women in new light?

“In the fleet, I'll sail my own boat,” says Debbie Squires-Coleman. In Episode 161, she joins Cynthia and Susan from her home in England to share this and other insights in an Embracing Your Journey discussion about her experiences as a Latter-day Saint woman. It’s a conversation about relationships and growth, full of wise glimpses into how it’s possible to walk together in love, even on divergent paths.

In Bonus Episode 160, Susan and Cynthia share and discuss more ALSSI listener voicemails.

We started this project in an effort to amplify Latter-day Saint women’s voices and create a safe space for sharing ideas and experiences. In Episode 159, Cynthia and Susan dive into listener voicemails to hear, share, and discuss things women in the ALSSI community are saying.

Telling the truth can be complicated for a Latter-day Saint woman, even if we value honesty. It’s hard to say out loud some of what we’re thinking, feeling, or experiencing. At church or even in our families and close relationships we may self-censor with an ‘okayness’ filter: Is it uplifting? Faith promoting? Too negative? Does it cast the Church in an unfavorable light? Sound contentious? Will I look less worthy/valiant/faithful? And how are others likely to react? In Episode 158, Susan and Cynthia are joined by author/columnist Jana Riess for a conversation about potential upsides and downsides of telling it like it is.

Every faith path is walked one step at a time. Every woman’s story is unique. In Episode 157, Cynthia and Susan are joined by Mer Monson to talk about her journey so far, and how the ground she’s traveled informs the way she’s walking now. It’s a conversation that radiates hard-won wisdom, an inspiring glimpse into one Latter-day Saint woman’s spiritual life.

There are many touchpoints with consent in a Latter-day Saint woman’s church life. From baptism to temple ordinances to accepting callings, we say yes over and over again, sometimes without ever seriously engaging our options. In Episode 156, Susan and Cynthia unpack consent. There are good reasons a woman might say ‘yes’ even while something inside her is saying ‘no,’ but true consent isn't coerced by force, threats, pressure, or intimidation. And silence is not consent.

For Latter-day Saint women in 1987, expectations outlined by the prophet were explicit: “Mothers in Zion,” he said, “Your God-given roles are so vital to your own exaltation and to the salvation and exaltation of your family.” In episode 155, Susan and Cynthia are joined by Susie Augenstein to break down the messaging mothers received then and have raised children in the shadows of since. It’s no wonder shifts in faith cause strain within families. This conversation is aimed at helping children of women who took President Benson’s words to heart understand why their mothers may sometimes fall into the trap of thinking they’re completely in charge of getting the whole family into heaven.

“What could a Relief Society lesson on racism look like?” “What do you wish other members of the Church knew about what it’s like to be a Black Latter-day Saint in 2023?” Cynthia asked Tamu Smith these questions and more as they visited in Cynthia’s kitchen with the recorder running. In Episode 154, Tamu shares her personal insights and answers in a wide-ranging, thoughtful conversation between two good friends.