Episode 127: Bon Jovi, "Wanted Dead Or Alive"

The unique legacy of Tommy James and the Shondells adds another chapter today, as Weird Al contends with Tiffany's smash cover of "I Think We're Alone Now." We're discussing Jersey-girl aspirational fashion, budge sound that's a feature and not a bug, and that person you could know becoming that person everyone does know. Take a break from sewing patches on your jean jacket and have a listen!

Our intro is by David Gregory Byrne, and our outro is by the Ramones. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• "What...is this thing?" Start at the beginning!
• The "I Think We're Alone Now" video
• "I Think I'm A Clone Now" fan vid with lyrics
• Episode 100: Surprise Party
• March MASTAS's Teen Idol Bracket
• "'A very sinister and dark story': How the mob helped Tommy James become a hit machine"

Can Weird Al inch ahead in the season standings with "I Lost On Jeopardy," his parody of the Greg Kihn Band's "Jeopardy"? We're talking early adopters, terrible album-title puns we admire, second careers, cheap-but-creepy videos, and how MB's personal Jeopardy! journey deepens his appreciation of this Yankovic joint. Tell 'em what they've won, Don Pardo! (It's either an all-new WAvE episode or some Rice-a-Roni.)

Our intro is by Laura Barger and Jack Baldelli, and our outro is by the Waitresses. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• "What...is this thing?" Start at the beginning!
• The Greg Kihn Band's "Jeopardy" video
• Weird Al's "I Lost On Jeopardy" video
• Horror Show on Goodreads
• WAvE Episode 04: "Eat It"

This week's match-up pits The Presidents of the United States of America's "Lump" against Weird Al's "Gump"...but is it really a face-off if the original is two thirds of the way towards being the parody? What is the age of Al-wakening? What's the difference between "unserious" and "unpretentious"? Are butt-adjacent references the Yankovic equivalent of a Hitchcock cameo? And did Al have any choice when it came to his subject matter back then? Watch out for those shifting matrices; it's an all-new ep of MASTAS.

Our intro is by David Gregory Byrne, and our outro is by the Offspring. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• "What...is this thing?" Start at the beginning!
• The official video for PUSA's "Lump"
• And the video for "Gump"
• Chris Ballew on his lyrical inspirations
• Episode 70: REM's "Out Of Time," Ranked
• Do Call It A Comeback, Episode 7: Footnotes and Odd Lots

"What if we just........didn't." That's one of the questions confronting us as WE confront an out-of-character entry in the Weird Al songbook: "Fat." The problems don't start there; there's the cheap-sounding and turgidly self-serious original, "Bad"; by problematic artist Michael Jackson; the risible video by MJ, and the shortcutsy cruelty from WA...there's even an ill-advised decision in a high-school talent show. Bass requests, Staying Alive references, and conscientious objections: it's an all-new MASTAS!

Our intro is by Laura Barger and Jack Baldelli, and our outro is by the Stone Roses. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• "What...is this thing?" Start at the beginning!
• Michael Jackson's "Bad" video
• We'll skip the link to the "Fat" video but here's some history on it
• The only three pop-culture minutes with more "hoooo!"s in it than "Bad"

Grab a tube sock for your privates: it's time to pit the Red Hot Chili Peppers against Weird Al! Before Mark makes the pun that drives our listenership numbers off a cliff, we're discussing the omnipresent Chilis hits "Under The Bridge" and "Give It Away"; how many songs Weird Al might have tried to fit his Flintstones joke set into before settling on these; the five items '90s dorm rooms had to contain lest their occupants risk expulsion; and the difference between "sexy" and "just always naked all the time." Hashtag justice for the Bee Girl: it's an all-new episode of MASTAS!

Our intro is by David Gregory Byrne, and our outro is by Queens of the Stone Age. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• "What...is this thing?" Start at the beginning!
• The "Under The Bridge" video
• The "Give It Away" video
• The "Bedrock Anthem" video
• ...and of course Blind Melon's "No Rain"
• That Rolling Stone cover story, in which Anthony Kiedis talks about the birth of "Under The Bridge"
• Flea's podcast, This Little Light

Welcome to the Weird Al vs. Everybody season of MASTAS! We're looking at a couple dozen Weird Al Yankovic songs and the originals that inspired him, and choosing a winner in each match-up -- starting with Coolio homage "Amish Paradise"! Before we get into self-serious videos for movies we think might be fake, cultural appropriation of pre-tech societies, and how Stevie Wonder feels about our swearing, we've got an important announcement about voting and future in-person events...but then we're back to discussing whether Weird Al-chemy turns "Gangsta's" into gold. Listen now, English!

Our intro is by David Gregory Byrne; the WAvE theme-let is a mash-up of Oingo Boingo, Elvis Costello, Black Box, and Michael Buffer; and our outro is by The Primitives. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• The "Gangsta's Paradise (feat. L.V.)" video
• The "Amish Paradise" video
• People recaps the Coolio/Al "feud"
• Vision Quest: it exists, people
• "Pastime Paradise" at WhoSampled.com

The competition is over, but the discussion of comeback songs isn't -- and today's is about comebacks in the answer/clapback sense. Seven "answer" songs come under the MASTAScope, as well as the frequency with which Neil Young is told to shut it, Bavaria's unexpected move to Ireland, the Judy Cycle opera we need to see, and pop songs that have become microplastics in their ubiquity. Vaseline those teeth and have a listen.

Our outro for today's episode is by Neil Young. For more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• Not sure what's going on here? Start at the beginning!
• Answer songs on Wikipedia
• The Lost Songs Project on "Judy's Turn To Cry"
• "No one knows why Ambrose Bierce disappeared, but here are some theories"
• Episode 79: TLC, "No Scrubs"
• Episode 195: Dolly Parton's Underrated Hits

It's time to declare a winner -- the definitive pop-music comeback song -- but the road to the final result is a twisty one. "Believe" and "Walk This Way" each crystallize the concept of the comeback, but in different ways, so to help us choose, we're watching videos, discussing the synecdoche of Cher, rummaging through a bin of PhD-thesis topics, and resisting arithmetic. Is the outcome predictable, or precedent-setting? AutoTune a drum roll and listen!

Our intro is an LL Byrne J mash-up, and our outro is by the Strokes. For more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• Not sure what's going on here? Start at the beginning!
• "Walk This Way"'s official video

The semifinal round is, while somewhat predictable, still full of ups and downs, including Spelling Bee's interest in our works and days, the way Adam Lambert takes and gives meaning, how far is far enough for a song we actively dislike, Latin-phrase drag names, scary puppets, and reader comments! Sorry about the sweaty-Reagan reference; distract yourself with our penultimate DCIAC episode.

Our intro is an LL Byrne J mash-up, and our outro is by Edie Brickell & New Bohemians. For more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• Not sure what's going on here? Start at the beginning!
• JASTAS: Til Tuesday, "Voices Carry"
• It's not John's and SDB's first meatloaf rodeo
• More on portmanteaux
• Do Call It A Comeback, Episode 7: Footnotes and Odd Lots
• Spitting Image

We're down to eight great comeback songs; which ones will join the Do Call It A Comeback season's Final Four? We're quoting Wayne's World, we're putting things in plaid place out of eight, we're remembering upsetting Beatles gifts, we're adding salt to temp tracks, and we're wondering why it so often seemed like nobody cared about Laura Branigan's reputation. Transmitting live-to-tape from the floor of the Utah legislature while on a date with Bonnie Raitt, it's Mark And Sarah Talk About Songs!

Our intro is an LL Byrne J mash-up, and our outro is by Squeeze. For more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

• Not sure what's going on here? Start at the beginning!
• Laura Branigan's insupportable "Hold Me" cover art
• Toothy D's Vegas residency
• Do Call It A Comeback, Episode 7: Footnotes and Odd Lots
• Episode 125: ABBA-sode with Adam Grosswirth