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    You deserve consistency. It should feel good - if it doesn’t, let that sh*t go.

    enSeptember 18, 2023

    Podcast Summary

    • Lack of urgency in a relationshipEarly relationships may need time for one person to initiate plans, but persistent lack of urgency could indicate incompatibility

      A lack of urgency in a relationship or situationhip can be a major turnoff. When someone doesn't show interest in making plans or spending time with you, it can make you question their feelings towards you. However, it's important to remember that there could be various reasons for this behavior, and it's not always a definitive sign of disinterest. If you're in the early stages of a relationship and experiencing this, give the person some time to initiate on their end. But if the lack of urgency persists, it might be worth reconsidering the compatibility of the relationship. Additionally, the speaker expressed excitement about potentially going on a podcast tour in 2024 and encouraged listeners to reach out if they'd be interested in attending a live taping.

    • Express feelings openly for relationship clarityEffective communication can resolve uncertainties in relationships, but expressing feelings can be intimidating, leading to potential benefits and new opportunities if unsuccessful.

      Effective communication is essential in navigating relationships, be it romantic or platonic. When uncertainty arises, expressing your feelings openly and honestly can lead to clarity and resolution of issues. It may be intimidating or uncomfortable, but the potential benefits far outweigh the risks. If communication fails to yield the desired outcome, it may be a sign that the relationship is not meant to be, and moving on can open the door to new opportunities and experiences. Ultimately, communication empowers individuals to take control of their relationships and fosters deeper connections.

    • Tolerating inconsistent communication in relationships is a thing of the pastAs we grow older and develop a strong self-concept, we no longer tolerate inconsistent communication in relationships. Everyone is busy, but a few days to reply to a message is unacceptable. Communication is key and if the response is not satisfactory, it may be time to move on.

      If you find yourself in a relationship with someone who consistently gives you hot and cold energy and makes excuses for not communicating, it may be best to walk away. The speaker shares her personal experience of realizing that as she grew older and developed a strong self-concept, she no longer tolerated such behavior. She emphasizes that everyone is busy, but a few days to reply to a message is unacceptable. Communication is key in any relationship, and if the response you receive is not satisfactory, it may be time to move on. The speaker also acknowledges the volume of messages she receives daily and tries her best to respond when she can, but her ultimate goal is to help people on a larger scale through her podcast.

    • Imagine and connect with your higher self for clarity in difficult decisionsVisualize your best self to gain clarity and make decisions that align with personal growth and self-love

      When faced with difficult decisions, particularly in relationships, it can be helpful to imagine and connect with your higher self. This higher self represents the best version of yourself, full of love, confidence, and inner strength. By asking yourself if this higher self would tolerate the current situation or person in your life, you can gain clarity and make decisions that align with your personal growth and self-love. This visualization technique can be applied to various situations, from romantic relationships to friendships or professional relationships. By focusing on your higher self, you can gain the confidence to let go of what no longer serves you and move towards a more fulfilling and authentic path.

    • Take control of emotions for positivityPractice self-affirmation, let go of negativity, hold yourself accountable, and use methods like exercise or self-talk to improve mood and clarity, ultimately attracting positivity and happiness.

      Taking control of your emotional state and thoughts is crucial for attracting positivity and happiness in life. When feeling down, practicing self-affirmation and letting go of negative influences can help improve mood and clarity. It's essential to hold yourself accountable, especially when alone, and use various methods, such as exercise or self-talk, to snap out of negative thought patterns. Remember, everyone deserves a dream life and happiness, so don't cage yourself in emotions that hinder personal growth. By focusing on positive thoughts and actions, one can feel good and free, ultimately attracting better people and experiences into their lives.

    • Love is a commitment that grows stronger over timeLove is more than just an initial attraction, it's a commitment that requires effort and dedication to build a strong foundation and grow over time.

      Love is a deep connection that grows stronger over time. According to the speaker's brother, who has been married for ten years and has children, love is not just an instant attraction but a commitment that requires effort and dedication. He shared that he fell in love with his wife early on and knew that he wanted to build a life with her. Over the years, their bond has only grown stronger as they have faced challenges together and raised a family. The speaker found it fascinating to hear her brother's perspective on love and the importance of building a foundation in a relationship. It serves as a reminder that love is not just about the initial attraction but about the commitment, effort, and experiences that come with building a life together.

    • Lessons on love and relationships from a married friendBuild a strong foundation, prioritize self-love, cut ties with toxic individuals, and focus on personal goals before seeking a romantic partner.

      Love and relationships require effort and growth, and it's essential to prioritize personal development and self-love. During a conversation with a married friend, the speaker learned about the importance of building a strong foundation in a relationship and the significance of cutting ties with individuals who don't contribute to personal peace and growth. The friend also advised focusing on personal goals and career development before seeking a romantic partner. The speaker was inspired by the conversation and plans to apply these lessons to her podcast, "Date Yourself Instead," which encourages self-love and personal growth. Overall, the conversation reinforced the importance of valuing oneself and prioritizing personal growth in relationships.

    • Evaluate relationships and consider letting goConsider letting go of 'good' relationships for 'better' ones, even if it's difficult. Don't settle for less than what makes you truly happy.

      It's important to evaluate relationships and consider letting go if you're not feeling 100% good about the situation, even if it seems good on the surface. The speaker emphasized the idea of letting go of "good" relationships to receive "better" ones, even if it's a difficult decision. This concept applies not only to romantic relationships but also to other areas of life where you might be compromising or settling for less than what you truly want. Remember, you have the power to decide if you're okay with having an 80% good situation and missing that crucial 20%, or if you're willing to let go and seek out something more fulfilling. Don't settle for less than what makes you truly happy.

    • Trusting the universe during difficult timesRecognize when being around someone drains you, trust the universe, and be open to new opportunities for personal growth and happiness.

      It's important to recognize when being around someone is making you feel unempowered and to trust that letting go and surrendering to the universe can lead to something greater. This concept can be difficult to accept during heartbreak or grief, but having faith that things are working out for the best and being open to receiving new opportunities can lead to personal growth and happiness. Remember, when you say no to what's not right for you, you open the door for something truly meant for you. Trust the process and give yourself time to heal.

    • Learning to say 'no' and set boundaries leads to greater personal power and fulfillmentSetting clear boundaries and saying 'no' to things that don't make you happy can lead to more authentic decisions and greater personal power and fulfillment.

      Learning to say "no" to things that don't make you happy and setting clear boundaries for yourself can lead to greater personal power and fulfillment. This can apply to various aspects of life, not just relationships. For example, the speaker shares how she used to feel pressured to attend work events and people-please, even when it was draining for her. By learning to prioritize her own needs and not care about others' perceptions, she was able to make decisions that felt lighter and more authentic. It's important to tune out external noise and make decisions based on what feels right for you, rather than pleasing others or fearing their judgment. This can be a valuable skill to carry with you throughout your life, especially when making decisions that may involve fear of missing out or uncertainty about your own desires.

    • Embrace self-reliance and trust your inner voiceCultivate self-love, independence, and self-care to navigate life's ups and downs. Trust your instincts and don't always need external validation or advice to make the right choices for yourself.

      It's essential to learn how to be self-reliant and depend on yourself, even when you don't have people around you. We all experience periods of loneliness, and it's crucial to trust your inner voice and make decisions based on your higher self. This doesn't mean isolating yourself but rather embracing the idea of being your own best friend. Cultivating self-love, independence, and self-care are valuable skills that will help you navigate life's ups and downs. Remember, you don't always need external validation or advice to make the right choices for yourself. Stay connected with yourself and trust your instincts. Additionally, don't hesitate to share your thoughts, feedback, and experiences with the speaker by following her on social media and engaging in conversations.

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