On the latest NPR Politics podcast, we look back on the life and legacy of Jimmy Carter. The former president died Sunday at the age of 100. And unlike other presidents, his accomplishments after leaving the Oval Office are arguably what most define his story. Listen to our remembrance of the 39th president on the NPR Politics podcast.
From NPR in WB EZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz Show. I'm Tim Meadows, and I'm a little disappointed that this is what Bill Curtis meant when he invited me to be part of his Christmas vacation. And here's our host at the Studebaker Theater in the Fine Arts Building in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sago. Thank you, Tim.
And as Jim said, Bill took off early for his Christmas break, but we're so happy to have you with us because who better to share these wonderful segments from the past year than somebody who hasn't heard them yet? Well, I look forward to regretting that I missed them the first time.
Let's start with what may be a true highlight of a year filled with them. In September, we went to Kansas City at the same time as legendary singer Dionne Warwick, who was there on tour. And she joined us on stage to talk about her incredible life. Here is an extended version of our talk with her. Thank you.
So your first of many hits, Don't Make Me Over, was released in 1962. Here what? It's 62 years later and you are still performing. Are you still enjoying it? Are you having fun? Oh yeah, I mean, it's something I've always tell people. I never wanted to work. To work?
Ever. No. And then this ever becomes a job. Mm-hmm. That's when I take my ballet slippers and do my pirouette and say, bye. You'd be done. Yeah. Do you have any idea what you'd do instead? Oh, yeah. Sure. Well, like what? Yeah. Well, I have already, I have an interior design company. There you go. Oh, wow.
Yes, if you need something done.
I was wondering what those paint stains were, but I know. That's great. I wonder, you have had such an extraordinary career. We can't even go into it. Is there a moment like that stands out for you in your career where you simply like, I cannot believe that a nice young woman from Orange, New Jersey is doing this? Was it, for example, performing for the Queen of England? Was it getting a lifetime achievement, Grammy? Is there anything like that stands out?
Yeah. Okay. I actually stopped Sidney Proctor. I did. I didn't do that. I don't think anybody can blame me for that. Okay. I think I speak for America when I say do town. I was coming out of a recording session.
And they were walking down Broadway. And all of a sudden I realized I was walking behind Sidney Poitier. And I said, oh my God. And you know, you've seen it in film.
I did it. You walk behind somebody, you don't want them to walk behind them, and then they stop and you stop. So he like spins around, because it's like someone's following me. And you did the thing where you looked away, oh no, I just happened to be standing here two feet behind you. You stopped at a red light. That's when he turned around and said, young lady, you talking to me?
We've been following me. Is there a reason? And, of course, I said, I knew. I had a complete loss of words. Really? And finally, I got up the nerve to ask him, will you sign this piece of paper for me? He said, of course I will. And he did. And I still have that piece of paper.
Oh, right. Forgive me. But did it not occur to you at that moment to say, I'm Dionne Monique. Perhaps you know me from my mini gold records. I don't think you would have cared. It was one of those really surreal moments where, I mean, I'm looking in the face. Assuming for us.
You know, and such a nice man. Yes. A lovely man. Every time I was around him after years go by. Sure. Every time he was a young lady, can I do something? Did he remember that? Because you probably ran into it many times. Did he in fact know who you were? No. He had no idea. I didn't know who I was.
It is amazing that that is the story you chose to tell from your remarkable career, and I kind of love it. Before we get to our little game with you, I did want to ask you about something else. In addition to everything else you've done, you have now been called the Queen of Twitter. You adopted Twitter.
And you are very good at it. And I'm sure you have no doubt having met you now that you do it yourself. Here are some of your best tweets. We have them here. Here's one from 2021. I just heard about Leonardo DiCaprio's 25-year rule. His loss, you don't know what you're missing.
And it's true. It is true. Which brings up another topic. I found out you were married once. That ended in the mid-70s. You never married again. What is it like to be out of everybody's league? I am having the best time.
I do. I do. However, I just got to add one more tweet before we move on. This is from 2022 from Ms. Dionne Warwick, the legend. I will be dating Pete Davidson next. Oh, well, nice dating everybody else. I know.
John Warwick, it is such an honor to talk to you, and we have asked you here to play a game we're calling, oh, so that's what friends are for.
That's what friends are for. Obviously, one of your greatest signature hits. But as great a song as it is, it doesn't cover all the things. Friends are four. So we're going to ask you three questions about other things that friends do. If you get too right, you'll win a prize for one of our listeners, the voice of anyone they might choose for their voicemail. Bill, who is Dion Warwick playing? Teresa Durkin of Kansas City, Missouri.
All right. Are you ready for this? I'm ready. First question, friends are great for helping you move, and you probably should call your friends rather than a certain real moving company, A, shattered glass movers in Seattle, Washington, B, hernia movers in Milwaukee, or C, two guys and no truck movers in Atlanta, Georgia. One of those is real.
Well, I don't like the sound of this shattered glass at all. I have too many valuable pieces. Of course. OK, so they're out. Hernia? Yeah, with some of the stuff that I have to move, they would get a hernia. You're right, hernia movers. They're real. Hernia movers has been helping
She does. Hernia movers has been helping people move around Milwaukee since 1975. Here's your next question. Another thing that friends are good for is, of course, rides to the airport. But it was likely a very bad friend who forgot what that was left at the Dublin airport. Was it a tombstone with the inscription, you will always be remembered, never forgotten.
be their friend's car, which they left in long-term parking for so long that it cost $100,000 to get it out or see their friend, who's been living at the airport now for 14 years. That was amazing.
I kept living there. You think, so you think that somebody went to the airport to get their friend, forgot to pick him up, and he's just been there for 14 years. The audience. All right, be on the number. That's all right.
But having spent a little time with you, I absolutely respect your confidence here. It's what I should have expected, but it is actually A, the tombstone. All right, here's your last question. The final thing friends are four is being a wingman. That is helping you meet dates when you're out together. Well, one such wingman posted his story on Reddit. He said his friend got divorced, was really broken up about it. So he took the divorced friend out to a bar to meet some ladies.
And then what happened? A, the bartender recognized his friend and called the police to have him arrested for robbing the place two weeks earlier. B, the wingman introduced the friend to an attractive woman there who turned out to be the friend's ex. Or C, the friend kept trying the line on the ladies, he's my wingman, but when you and I get married, he'll be our ring man.
Oh, I know, yes. Making that face. You can immediately throw out three, I think, right? Oh, okay. I think he likes his X, doesn't he? You think it's that one? Yeah. You're right. That's what I actually got. He says he was chatting up this woman in the bar. He said, hey, have you met my friend John over here? Yes, she had. Wow. Bill, Bill, how did Dionne Warwick do on our quiz? Oh, you know she got two right. I forget the third. Yeah.
But that's a winner in our game. There you are. Add that to the list. Deon Warwick is a six-time Grammy winner. She's touring around the globe this year. You can find dates at official, deonwarwick.com. Deon Warwick, thank you so much for gracing us with your pleasure. Sit it up for your living legend, everybody.
When we come back, Allison Felix, one of the greatest to ever run track, an interior designer, Nate Berkus, one of the greatest ever to help you pick out a tie rack. Oof, no wonder Bill didn't want to be here for this. That's when we come back with more Wait, Wait, Don't tell me from NPR. Hey, it's Peter Saggle. The year is almost over. And now is the time when NPR and I come to you hat in hand and ask for your support. Now, interestingly,
The idiom hat in hand does not refer to say a street performer walking around holding out his hat for people to put in money. I always thought it was.
No, it is actually referring to an old tradition when knights would remove their helmets and show humility. So it's really more about my attitude of supplication than it is about asking for money. Even though, of course, I'm going to be asking for money. Now, if you heard that and you said to yourself, wow, that's fascinating. I was also under that misapprehension as to the idioms meeting, then you, my friend, are one of us. That means you enjoy our show.
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From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Tim Meadows, filling in for Bill Curtis. And here's your host at the Studebaker Theater in the Fine Arts Building in downtown Chicago, Illinois. Peter Sago, thank you, Tim.
And so you are hearing all these segments for the very first time. What do you think so far? Well, I'm amazed at what they can do with deep fakes these days. It really sounded like you were really talking to Dion Warwick.
If you thought that was impressive, way to hear this segment with Allison Felix, one of the greatest Olympians to ever lace up track shoes. She joined us in July of this year, right before this year's Olympics with guest host Karen Chi. I read online that you found out you were good at track because you were trying to make new friends at a new high school, right? Yeah, that's right. I just went out for the team to meet people, but I came out for basketball before that. Gotcha. And very quickly, it was clear that that was not my gift.
Everyone's like passing the ball, but you're just sprinting up and down the court. Yep. That's amazing. So at what point in your life did you realize, even if your basketball skills were the greatest, when did you realize that you had a superhuman talent for running? It happened pretty quickly. So I came out for the team in ninth grade. And then the first year after I graduated, I found myself in the Olympics. So it was kind of a wahoo.
Allison, that's so incredible. I love that so much. And I just want to say for the record, I've never tried track and field, so I'm going to try and I'll be at the next Olympics, I'm sure. I have a question, which is, so I love watching the games on television from my couch. And I always see athletes, but especially runners, kind of like murmuring to themselves right before they start a race. Do you do that? And what are you saying to yourself?
I do. I definitely am like talking to myself. I think some people are like hyping themselves up. For me, I am like like technical thoughts. I'm like, okay, I'm dry because you're talking about coming out of the blocks, keep your head down. I just like like to give myself a few cues so that I can make sure like I'm locked in and those are the things I need to be thinking about. Wow. And then when you're actually running, are you also actively thinking or are you sort of letting muscle memory take over?
At that point, I am. I have cues at each point of the race. I'm thinking what I need to be doing when I hit certain markers. But sometimes, if your mind can wander to a place that's not good, sometimes in the 400, which is a race that I feel like it's just way too long, I'll agree. I agree. Sometimes if I'm running that race, I might get to the 100 meters and I'll be like, oh my gosh, I'm already tired.
That's not good. Olympians are just like us. We agree we both think the 400 meters is too long. Because you run professionally, when you have to run for stuff in your everyday life, like if you're late for the bus or something, are you kind of just like, oh, now I'm doing work for free?
Printers are actually the slowest walkers ever. It's actual, so I don't know. Yeah, we don't like to go fast anywhere else, but on the track. Wow, that's pretty good. Olympics just like us. That's fantastic. All right, Allison, we've asked you here to play a game we're calling. 200 meters? How about these meters?
You've won many medals racing the 200 meter and the 400 meter, so we thought we'd ask you about the parking meter. If you answer two out of three questions correctly about one of the last things you can use coins for, you will win a prize for one of our listeners, the voice of any one of us on their voicemail. Bill, who is Alice in playing for? Brennan Schmidt of Concord, New Hampshire.
All right, Alison, here's your first question. A man named Charles Mysack has sold used books on a New York street corner since the 90s, and he found the parking meter they're very convenient in what way? A, he has sold over a million 25 cent postcards to people who needed change for the meter.
B, he stored his books in the car, which he kept in the same parking spot for 11 years feeding the meter every day. Or C, he protected his crate of valuable rare books by locking it to the meter with a bike lock. Let's go with A. Oh, would you want to guess again? B? Yes!
That is correct. He parked in the same space for 11 years, only moving the car for street cleanings. I guess, finally, someone else zipped in there real fast. All right, Allison, here's our next question. In the state of Florida, parking meters aren't just for cars. You are also required by law to feed the meter when. A, when you tie an alligator to the parking meter,
B, when you were drinking rum on the sidewalk. Or C, when you were saving good seats for the 4th of July parade. C, I mean, that's supper. Oh, what could I give you? What could I give you as I could try? I wish I could do this in the Olympics. Oh, honey room A? Yes, that's correct.
A is correct, so if you see an alligator on the sidewalk, park there, the meter is already paid. Here is your last question. A New York parking enforcement officer was sent to jail after he embezzled over $90,000 in quarters that he collected from meters over the course of five years. How was he finally caught? A. He got a hole in his pocket and police followed a trail of coins to his house.
B, he was overheard on his collection route saying, one for you, a one for me. Or C, the bank in town called the police and said, hey, this guy in a parking enforcement uniform keeps depositing huge piles of quarters into his bank account. I'm going to do C. Yes, that's correct.
What was he supposed to do? Go back to the office with all those quarters in his pockets? No, you walk right into the back and uniform and deposit them. Bill, how did Allison do on our quiz? He broke the tape and won all three races.
Allison Felix is one of the greatest sprinters of all time, a multiple world and Olympic champion. Allison, thank you truly so much for joining us on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.
Before we move on, that's what you do. You invite world-class athletes and ask them silly questions about things you know nothing about. And they agree to it? Well, yeah, we don't warn them in advance. They think we're normal NPR. I even have a Steve Inkskeep wig. Yeah, I know. I fell for it, too. In August.
In August of this year, we went to Minneapolis, and we're joined by one of the most famous sons of that city, designer, Nate Birkis. So let's start at the beginning. You found your love of interior design. Well, you were very young, growing up here, right? I did, yeah. So how old are we talking?
Well, my mother was an interior designer here in Minneapolis. I have a younger sister and a middle brother and he once coined our family phrase as what we did on the weekends as either shop or be left behind. So my mother would take us to auctions and antiques malls and still water and downtown Hopkins and all these places looking at old things and looking at antiques and vintage things. And my job was to carry the wallpaper books in from the trunk of her car to her home office.
She's also why I have muscles. That's true. Yeah. So you started out both as an interior designer and as a gym rat. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So if I met you at the age of 10, would you be like all about design and antiques? No, no, but I was definitely sidetracked if there was somebody was setting up for a garage sale on my way to the bus stop.
I'm picturing a young story, like almost a forest gump like Serendipity, where Prince is putting a plaid all over his estate, and you're like, my man, Paisley, Evan, just walk away. That was me. That was me. Yeah, that was me. I'm actually Apollonia. Five more. That's amazing.
Do you remember the first time you ever designed something? You ever set up a room? No, I do. My parents gave me my own bedroom because I shared a room prior to that with my filthy younger brother. The worst one. No, but the first thing I ever was allowed to design was my own bedroom. And I actually wrote about this years ago because it was such an interesting thing for me as a 12-year-old kid to be able to pick out
at the time, again, my mom was an interior designer, so she had all the carpet samples and wallpaper books, and she said to me, what do you want your room to look like? And I remember it was the 80s, and I said, I want gray, white, and red.
And she was like, that's so ugly, though. And I was like, but it's cool. And so I remember, though, it was agency. It's what it felt like. I had the agency to pick my own environment. And I do think that that's why I've spent the greater part of 30 years helping other people create a home that means something about it. I think that that is connected.
I think that's great. I do love the idea of you, as you said, 13-year-old. 12-year-old. Yeah. 12-year-old. Yeah. Which in the early teens, it's very rebellious age. That the source of your conflict with your mother was color pouts. Did she?
Did she, like, you know, search your room where you weren't there and found, like, illicit, uh, swatch books in your sock drawer? Yeah. You know, I'm home and she's holding up a pantomime. Yeah, it was amazing. Right. Yeah. No gay porn, just a wallpaper sample. Which, let's just be honest, see. I am. If you're, if you're a 12-year-old
After a 12-year-old kid has wallpaper sample books hidden in his doctor, it's essentially the same as Kate Dovlin. Peter. The conclusion has got to be the same. Did you, like as a young man, was it hard to find places to design? Do you know what I mean? Like if you wanted to be in a van, you'd get a guitar. Right. Were you like, oh, and I think I could really fix up your ice fishing hut.
No, I mean, you know what, though? Bobcat, actually, now that you ask, I was notorious among my friends when they would invite me over for a play date or sleepover, whatever, that I remember my friend, Ronnie Swartz, his mother came home and Ronnie and I were like hanging out at their house and I had pushed all the living room furniture into a different location.
So it wasn't and she said did you move my sofa and I said, yeah, don't you think it looks better like this?
And she said, I do. Wait, I have a question. Yeah. You and your husband are both hot. That has nothing to do with the question I just wanted to say. OK. All right. Wait, so since you're both designers, who wins, like, do you have a chair in your house that you hate? OK, so here's the thing. If one person hates it, it's out. And we don't talk about it. And you can't try and sell it to the other person. And boy, can we sell to each other?
You can't like if one if you I say I hate it then the conversation's done and vice versa We will fight Like like beyond like really really rip each other to shreds over who ate the last piece of pizza before we fight over a sofa That sounds like couple therapy, right? I mean, you know
Nate Burke is delighted to have you here. We have asked you to play a game we're calling trying some exterior decorating. So you do interior decor. We thought we'd ask you about exterior decor, namely tattoos. Perfect. Is it perfect? Yeah, this is great. So we're going to ask you three questions about tattoos. Get too right. You want to prize for one of our listeners. Bill, who is Nate Burke is playing for? Martin Gardner of Minneapolis, Minnesota.
Here's your first question, ready? Ariana Grande released her single Seven Rings. She celebrated by going down to the tattoo parlor and getting a tattoo of the two Japanese characters, meaning seven and ring. One problem though, what was it? A, the tattoo artist inked a seven next to a little portrait of Ringo Starr.
Be the tattoo artist instead did the Japanese characters for bad and blood because bad blood is the Taylor Swift single that he preferred to any of her music or See those two characters combined form a proper noun meaning a small charcoal grill I'm going to see you're correct. Yes
Basically, it's like you try to get something and it ends up just being like a hibachi. All right. Next question. Tattoo artists sometimes make mistakes, like when a cannabis enthusiast asked for a tattoo of a pocket watch showing the time 420. But what happened? A, even though it's an ink and never changes, the clock is still always four minutes fast.
B, he did the pocket watch with a lid closed so you can't see what time it is. Or C, he accidentally drew it backwards realizing afterwards that now the clock reads 7.40. I think you drew it backwards. You're right. It says 7.40. Wow.
And to think I've been just sewing bath mats all these years. I know. You could have been acing quizzes, I guess. Anyway, last question. See if you can make this as perfect as everything else is. OK. Sometimes a tattoo artist's mistake turns out to be a kind of happy accident, like in which of these cases, A, a tattoo reading Murphy's law, I.E. The idea that anything that can go wrong will go wrong. And he misspelled it Murphy's law.
He, an artist, putting in the name of a man's new baby, put Maya instead of the baby's name, Mara. But it turned out the doctor had made the same typo in the birth certificate. Or see, a woman got a tattoo of a forest which looked terrible, but it just so happened that tree trunks happened to form a UPC code that gets her the employee discount when she scans it at Nordstrom.
Um, I think it's B. You think it's B, the matching typos? No, it was actually Murphy's Law. It was, okay. Oh, Murphy's Law. The client saw it and was utterly delighted. Bill, how did Nate Burke is doing our quiz? It was almost perfect, but you still got two out of three, which means you're a winner! There we go, Bob. There we go.
Nate Bercus is an acclaimed interior designer who is up to so many different things. You can find them all at natebercus.com. Nate Bercus, thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much. Thank you, sir. Nate Bercus, everybody. Calm down, Mira.
When we come back, one of the greatest actors alive talks about getting his parts just right. And the comedian makes the worst mistake anybody can make taking part in a game show. Oh, come on. Now you're just trolling me. That's when we come back with more of what we don't tell me from NPR.
From NPR in WBEZ, Chicago. This is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Tom Meadows, filling in for Bill Curtis. And here's your host at the Studebaker Theater in the Fine Arts Building in downtown Chicago. Peter Siegel. Thank you, Tim. Thank you, everybody.
Now, we're thrilled to have Tim here because while some of the segments we are rebroadcasting this week are quite familiar to you, they're new to him. Well, no, that's not actually true. I absolutely listen to some of these when they were broadcast because sometimes the Uber driver refuses to change the station.
Well, I hope you didn't hear this conversation with actor Gary Oldman, who appeared in September to talk about the new season of his show about seemingly incompetent British spies, the show Slow Horses. I asked him about the character he plays, Jackson Lamb. Jackson Lamb, it was once.
A very, very good agent working for, you know, MI5. What we see when we meet him in slow horses is the sort of smoldering embers of the man that was once legendary. I think that Jackson Lamb has the greatest character introduction I have ever seen. When we meet Jackson Lamb, he's having a nap in the office, and he farts himself away.
I mean, let's face it, you've done a lot of good work in your career, Gary, but I don't know if you've ever done anything that immediately, a bucket of it. You know, but we do. I never thought I'd see the day where I'm having email exchanges with the director talking about the quality of facts.
But because, you know, they, I'm not a messenger artist, so they have to dub it. Or should I say, I'm not a messy actor. I was gonna ask, is it like, when you have a stand in? Like, you know, if someone doesn't want to do a nude scene, they have a stand, is there somebody who is farting in place of you? Yeah. Do you have a colon double?
And actually, shouldn't that be the person nominated for an Emmy? I think a little selfish, Jerry. No, I'm sure there's somebody in Karen's box to answer your question. I'm sure there's somebody in a room. And you were nominated for an Emmy? You were there?
If I'm not mistaken, you were caught up in the great Shogun Sweep of all the awards, right? Oh, yeah, yeah. I mean, they were, I think they'd be nominated for 14 at night 125. How do they do that? Did you have a speech ready? I've always wondered about that. Yeah, I think it's polite. Yeah. And what do you do with it if you don't get to use it? That's the other option. What was that?
Well, more recently, my wife has been keeping them and throwing them sort of in a box in the archive, as it were. How many of you have? Well, I've lost a lot. Not quite a collection.
Gary it is an absolute pleasure to talk to you again and once again we have asked you here to play a game and this time we are calling it the slowest horses of all
You, of course, are in slow horses as we have discussed, so we thought we'd ask you about the very slowest horses, that is, hobby horses. Hobby horses are the horse that toy. It's a stick with a horse's head. And people actually ride these hobby horses in competitive events called hobby horsing, where they go around gates and jump over fences and do dressage just like
real horses. So we're going to ask you three questions about hobby horsing. Get two of them right. We will win our prize for one of our listeners, the voice of anyone they may choose for their voicemail. Ayesha, who is Gary Oldman playing for? Martin Oliver of Los Angeles, California. All right. Ready to do this? Have you heard or seen hobby horsing? I have seen it. Yeah, it's
So, now, if you've watched it, and there are many videos online, you can watch them. You'll notice that it's very popular with young girls. But, according to hobby horse riders Australia, boys are starting to get interested in the sport, but with a notable change. What is it? A, they prefer hobby war-horsing with jousts. B, they make and ride hobby dinosaurs. Or C, boys rules allow them to turn the horses around and pretend the sticks are guns.
I'm gonna go with jousting. You're gonna go with jousting. That is a natural choice, but it's actually hobby dinosaurs.
You still have two more chances, so you're all good here. The very first American Hobby Horse Championships were held in Michigan, and the competitors who came had to deal with some significant obstacles, such as which of these. A, due to a quirk in Michigan law, the horses had to be stabled and given adequate food and water, even though they are not real.
Be those who flew there could not bring their hobby horses on board the plane, because they could be used as a weapon, or see the Northern Midwest Alliance for Animal Liberation, which on the first day of competition tried to liberate the, quote, spiritual horses.
I'm gonna have to go with C. No, I'm afraid it was B. They could not bring the hobby horses onto the plane because if they are essentially four foot long sticks, you could use them as a weapon. Okay, that was the obvious one. Yeah, I know. Alright, you have one more chance here. Let's see what happens.
Some competitors use the hobby horse for every event. But, you know, when it's time to retire your loyal hobby horse, don't worry, because you can always do what? A, bring them to Lincoln, Massachusetts, where they can live out at the end of their days with other hobby and rocking horses in a grassy kind of pasture. Really, just break them in half to create two hobby ponies.
Or C, send them to a factory to be turned into woody glue. I'm thinking, when you're done with the horse, I'm not saying that you literally turn it into two ponies, but you just snap the scarf of your name and throw it in the bin. No, it was actually A.
Nobody knows. Nobody knows who put the first rocking horse in this pasture near Lincoln, Massachusetts. But it has been joined over the years by dozens more hobby horses, rocking horses. So Aisha?
Oscar winning, actor Gary Oldman doing our quiz. Well, I think that because he has lost a lot and with the Emmys and things like that, I think we should give it to him. Well, congratulations on this big win. I hope it makes up forever.
Gary Oldman is an Oscar-winning actor, and if you have not yet watched him in the show, slow horses on Apple TV. I envy you, because you get to start from the beginning. Gary Oldman, thank you so much for joining us. I'm Wade McDonald. What a pleasure to talk to you again. Take care. Awesome.
Finally, also in September, we spoke to comedian and impressionist Jay Farrow, who had just become the host of a new game show called The Quiz With Balls. Really. Tim, do you happen to know Jay Farrow? I actually am Jay Farrow. This is us. I'm doing the Tim Meadows impression right now. That's pretty impressive. Here is Jay as himself.
So first of all, I should say welcome to the pinnacle of human achievement, the game show host. It's not as easy as it looks, is it?
No, no, no, it's not as easy as it looks and you definitely just have to be able to improv and be able to just think on the fly. On the show and in your own comedy, you are known for these astounding impressions. Is there one like in your entire roster of people you can do that you're most proud of? The one that I would say, I'm the originator of it and nobody had done it like me was Will Smith and that one is just one that's
You know, like, you know, that's the one that, you know, everybody, you know, pretty much like loves because it's not the kind of impression that's like just found. You know, it's not like a, it's not like a hot pocket. It was more like tenderloin. That was...
And I say, that was a little eerie, is what that was. I say, I see Jay also does a fantastic rest, and I imagine at some point he ended up slapping himself. And my body's asking you. Damn. Damn. No, I don't want to swap this guy. You've got to let us hear it, right? Not freaking good. OK. OK. That's right.
And you know what? I got to say this, like, you know, I really do apologize, you know, to everybody in America and everybody ubiquitously around the world. What I should have done instead of smacking Chris Rock was I should have waited for the commercial break out of what we look like a holy situation.
Well, this might be fun, because who knows? You can do this as a group. Jay Farrow, we have asked you here to play a game we're calling... You can keep your balls. So, as we have established, you've hosted the game show The Quiz with Ball, so we thought we'd ask you about games that don't require any balls at all. Answer two or three questions right. He will win our prize for one of our listeners. Bill, who is Jay Farrow playing for?
Shane Brown of Portland, Oregon. All right, here is your first question. There's lots of games you can play with a frisbee instead of a ball, but not all frisbees are alike. You could find yourself catching which of these. A, the combat frisbee lined with razors along the edge.
B, Frisbee for dummies, which has an iron coating and comes with gloves lined with magnets. Or C, a disc molded out of the ashes of Ed Hedrick, one of the inventors of the Frisbee.
Well, I hope it's not the third one. I don't know, I don't know, Kev, what do you, Kev, do you have anything on this? Listen, I will see you. Listen, people, what a guy, tell you this, tell you this right now. I believe that the answer is B, that's what I think it is.
So are you going to trust Kevin Hart on this, James? Is that what you're going to be? I got to trust Kev. I think he knows. He let you down. It was C. It's actually the guy who invented, as part of his will, one of the guys who invented the Frisbee, he asked to be cremated, and then he had his ashes mixed in to plastic to make Frisbees that were sold for charity.
And they're out there in the world. There's still too much chances. All right. Here's your next question. Cornhole, that's the game popular here in the Midwest, where you try to toss bean bags through a hole in a board. We all know this game, right? But there are international variants, such as which of these? One of these is real. A, the game of Tejo in Columbia, where players throw their bags at exploding targets filled with the gunpowder.
be trampol in Australia where you bounce off a mini trampoline and try to throw yourself through the hole or see Crickhole in England where the other player can defend the goal with a cricket bat. You know what? Would Jay-Z help out with this one? I don't think some of the Jay-Z says a lot that might be the answer. Yeah.
After thinking about that, comparatively, to the other answers, I'll say, hey. Jay-Z is correct. That is right. And it's absolutely true. Imagine cornhole. But if you hit the target, an explosive charge goes off. Boom, it is the second most popular sport in Columbia after soccer. You know, my intuition spoke from me. That was the hustle of homey. Yeah.
All right, last question. Everybody loves to play darts, right? But it's not as easy as it looks. What is a proven way to improve your darts game? A, just closing your eyes and throwing randomly toward the target. B, spinning around four times and then throwing it like a discus toss. Or C, just getting a little drunk.
Now, let me, before I answer this question, I'm just gonna say it. There was a lot of fallacy that's been spoken, a lot of things could be spoken. A lot of, oh Lord. I'm gonna go with B. Sir, are you sure?
You shouldn't be crying, come on a sophisticated time, just answering questions, that's all. So, me, have to say it like a dude. For some reason, I've never said this with more pleasure, but you're wrong.
I'm having a lot of emotions here, Jay. The answer is actually C, getting drunk, studies have proved that just a little alcohol improves your dark game. That's why they play it in bars. But technically, Jay didn't get any of them wrong. He did, Jay. Yes. You walk out here with a clean record. Bill, how did the Jay and his friends do in our quiz? You know, he's a winner, and you're going to leave a winner. Absolutely not afraid. Not your fault.
That's it for our it's Tim Meadows first-time edition. Wait, wait, don't tell me is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with urgent hair car productions Doug Berman, benevolent overlord. Philip Godeker writes our limericks, our public address announcer is Paul Friedman. Our tour manager is Shane at Donald. B.J. Letterman composed our theme, our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Roomboss, and Lillian King. Special thanks to Monica Hickey and Blythe Robertson. Peter Gwynn is our belly full of jelly.
Our vibe curator is Emma Choi, technical director from Lorna White, our CFO's Colin Miller. Our production manager is Robert Newhouse, our senior producer is Ian Chilog and the executive producer of What We Don't Tell Me. It's Mike Danforth. Thanks to everybody you heard on today's show, our panelists, our guests, guest host Karen Chi, guest scorekeeper Aisha Roscoe. And of course, Mr. Tim Meadows. And thanks to all of you for listening here at the Student Maker Theatre and wherever you might be on Peter Zegel, we'll be back next week.
