Why 99% of Relationships FAIL (Do THIS Today to Find Lasting Love!) | Michael Todd

Healthy and successful relationships require individuals to bring their full and authentic selves to the table. Many people enter relationships with versions of themselves that have been shaped by past trauma and hurt. This often leads to guarding against potential pain and limiting the amount of love they are able to experience. To truly love and be loved, individuals must be vulnerable and open themselves up to the possibility of getting hurt. It is important to take the time to heal from past wounds and understand who you truly are before entering into a relationship. By doing so, individuals can create a strong foundation for a fulfilling and lasting partnership.

Healing is essential for a better quality of life. Just as athletes have an off-season to heal and improve, we also need time to heal physically, emotionally, and mentally. Many people jump from relationship to relationship or venture to venture without taking the necessary time to heal themselves. By neglecting our healing, we are not able to bring our full selves to others, hindering our relationships and preventing us from reaching our fullest potential. Self-love and self-reflection are crucial in order to love and connect with others authentically. It may be scary to face our traumas, but examining the pattern and breaking the cycle through healing can lead to greater joy, fulfillment, and success in our relationships.

Healing is essential in order to fully love and be loved. No matter how successful or put-together you may seem on the outside, deep down you know if you're still hurting. If you don't take the time to heal and address your trauma, you'll continue to attract relationships based on your insecurities rather than finding true love. It's important to face your trauma, talk about the bad stuff that happened, and seek intentional time with yourself, God, and your community. This journey may be difficult, but it's worth it because it allows you to discover your true value and add value to others. Even in a broken relationship, healing is possible if both individuals commit to the journey.

Making progress, even imperfect progress, can increase the grace and understanding that others have for our mistakes. When someone sees us trying and putting in effort, their ability to forgive and support us grows exponentially. This applies not only to relationships but also to various aspects of our lives, such as health, finances, and personal growth. By making the decision to change, turning that decision into a discipline, and consistently working towards our goals, we can eventually develop a genuine desire for positive change. This transformation in our mindset and actions has the power to shape our destiny and turn trauma into triumph.

Taking care of ourselves physically, mentally, and emotionally is crucial for personal growth and success. Michael Todd shares his journey of transforming his life by investing in his physical health, which had a profound impact on his mindset and confidence. He emphasizes the importance of trusting oneself and keeping personal promises, as this directly affects how we approach and interact with others. Through his experience, he encourages others to work on all three components - spiritual, physical, and emotional - to enhance their quality of life. Michael's story reminds us that prioritizing self-care and personal development can lead to a vibrant, fulfilling life filled with purpose and happiness.

Prioritizing our health is crucial for sustaining long-term success and impact. Michael Todd emphasizes that even if we're making a great impact in our work or achieving success, neglecting our health can lead to unhealthy habits that jeopardize everything. When we're not physically and mentally well, the pressure of our accomplishments becomes harder to bear. We may find ourselves resorting to unhealthy coping mechanisms like substance abuse and self-medication. Our bodies store past traumas and stress, and failing to address these issues can have detrimental effects on our well-being. Therefore, it is essential to confront our past, deal with our insecurities, and prioritize self-care to achieve clarity and pave the way for a great future.

We often push ourselves to be great in order to compensate for past experiences of being overlooked or denied opportunities. This drive for greatness can lead to success and recognition in various aspects of life, but it can also blind us to the value of simply being good. Michael Todd shares how his childhood desire to play drums in the church led him to become consumed with the need to be great at everything. However, when faced with personal struggles, such as his son's autism diagnosis and his wife's depression, he realizes that being great is not always the answer. He learns the importance of appreciating the good that surrounds us and recognizing that God's standard of "good" is sufficient.

Our value system plays a crucial role in our overall well-being and success. Michael Todd's story teaches us that focusing solely on external achievements and validation can lead to a hollow existence, masking deep-rooted pain and insecurities. It is important to recognize and address the trauma and damage that may have shaped us, as neglecting these issues can hinder our personal growth and potential for true happiness. By working through our past and healing ourselves, we can transform our pain into a source of strength, using our experiences to connect with others and make a positive impact. Ultimately, prioritizing inner peace and authenticity over external validation is what truly matters.

Prioritizing others' thoughts of you over your own well-being will ultimately lead to exhaustion and potentially jeopardize your own happiness and peace. Michael Todd shares his personal experience of choosing between being a people pleaser and prioritizing his family's needs. Despite the potential consequences, he made the decision to prioritize his family's health and cancel several speaking engagements, which were a significant source of income. This decision led to a transformative period in his life, where he focused on introspection and finding inner peace. The key lesson here is that investing in your own well-being and staying true to your purpose can have far more value than the short-term benefits of constantly seeking external validation. It's important to prioritize self-care and evaluate what truly matters to you in order to live a more fulfilling life.

Living by principles rather than opinions can lead to greater success and fulfillment. Michael Todd shares his experience of taking a month-long sabbatical to prioritize himself, his family, and his spiritual health. Despite the fear of losing momentum and sales, he stayed true to his word and shut off promotion for his bestselling book. This decision ultimately resulted in personal growth and the success of his subsequent book. The lesson here is that when we prioritize self-care and live by principles, we not only become better individuals but also attract the right opportunities and partnerships aligned with our purpose. By choosing partners based on purpose rather than pleasure, we can create more meaningful and successful relationships.

Relationships thrive when there is alignment in purpose and values. It's not enough to have physical attraction or love for each other; there needs to be a shared vision and a value system that guides both individuals. When two people are going in the same direction for a purpose, they can experience exponential growth, clarity, and success. Picking a partner based on shared purpose is crucial, just like in starting a company. If a relationship lacks purpose, it's not the end; couples can create purpose by going on a vision retreat together, discussing their goals and values, and finding common ground. This can help couples stay connected and build a strong foundation for their relationship.

Regularly revising and realigning your values and vision in a relationship can lead to clarity, peace, and a purposeful connection. Just like a car needs an alignment to stay balanced on a rough road, relationships require the same attention to prevent drifting or falling apart. As seasons change and circumstances evolve, it's vital to redefine what you value and envision, maintaining openness to growth and adaptation. This process of revision promotes understanding and prevents stagnation, allowing couples, friends, or business partners to navigate various trials and triumphs together. By incorporating faith and family, you can establish a motivating why, even in challenging times, and transform traumatic experiences into your greatest victories.

Authenticity and being true to oneself is a superpower. Being real and admitting when you're wrong is important. Enjoying the journey and staying consistent over time can lead to great accomplishments and growth. It's easy to underestimate what can be achieved in the long term. Instead of focusing on immediate results, it's important to stay disciplined and value oneself. By valuing who we are and adding value to others, we can create a life that is admirable and fulfilling. True fulfillment comes from a relationship with the creator and oneself, not from external sources like success or material things. Being of service to oneself and being a source of growth and nourishment for others is key. Even when it's not popular or goes against others' opinions, being there for others in their low moments is a testament to the love and grace of God.

We should strive to be like the Good Samaritan, reaching out to help those who are hurting and broken, regardless of their background or reputation. Michael Todd emphasizes the importance of being of service, showing love, and accepting others just as they are. He believes in representing the message of Jesus Christ authentically and accepting people before they believe or behave differently. He challenges the notion of just hearing the message of the Bible and encourages living it out through love and relationships. Ultimately, Todd's three truths are: God is love, you are valuable, and we should strive to be of service to others.

True greatness lies in being good at what you know your purpose to be. It's not about striving to be great at everything, but rather focusing on aligning yourself with your purpose and excelling in that area. Michael Todd emphasizes the importance of leaving a legacy for his family, not just in terms of material possessions, but also in emotional and spiritual health. He believes that by dealing with our own issues and transforming ourselves, we prevent our loved ones from being affected by our unresolved baggage. Ultimately, the key to greatness is being true to yourself, embracing your purpose, and having a positive impact on those around you.