What to do when it feels like NOTHING is going your way (E)

Hello beautiful people and welcome to the episode of today. This episode, I think, will resonate with almost everyone. Yes, it is an Encore episode. Yes, we're all still away on holidays, but this episode, if I may say so myself, is elite. And it is from episode 179,

what to do when it feels like nothing is going your way. This episode will take you from feeling completely disempowered, from feeling like you are powerless in every situation, to taking control back and to feeling like you have more control than you give yourself credit for. You'll feel more stable, you'll feel more grounded, you'll feel a bit calmer, your anxiety will go down, you'll be able to kind of look at your life situation and feel like it's not actually

all that bad, I've got something to work with here, okay? So no matter what stage you're in or whatever it is that you're going through, I really hope that this episode will really help ground you and make you feel a lot calmer about your current situation. And to then turn it all around and fucking be the main character of your life. Love you so much. I hope you enjoy the episode.

you are as much as it doesn't feel like it in a position of power and I'll be explaining why that is. Now before we go into it I thought I'd do a little brain fact. I actually had someone ask me about if I could just specify what this is about and it is

dementia with lui bodies and they wanted to know what the lui bodies was with the dementia because there's all these different kinds of dementia you've got so dementia is like an overarching term and then you've got your different kinds of dementia so for example alzheimer's dementia alzheimer's disease which is the most common one and then you've got lui body

Dementia with Lewy bodies or Lewy body dementia. That's the second most common one. And then we've got, you know, things like frontotemporal dementia and there's other kinds as well. But there's that dementia with Lewy bodies is the second most common form of dementia. So how was it characterized?

Lewy body dementia is progressive and it is degenerative and age is the biggest risk factor for it. So what I mean by progressive and degenerative is that there's the onset and it progressively gets worse and it is something that is causing degeneration within the brain.

Some symptoms are similar to Alzheimer's disease, but then there's other symptoms that are not, for example, difficulty walking upstairs, difficulty walking on patent floors. The short term memory is intact for some time, unlike Alzheimer's disease where you start to lose your short term memory and then it eats into long term memory.

There's your movement is affected. So you've got tremors, slowness in movement, confusion, visual hallucinations, problems with your balance, speech problems. And then you've got mood disorders as well, like apathy, anxiety, depression, sleep disorders. And then as part of the movement thing as well, you can become incontinent as well.

But what is it? This is like the billion dollar question. What is causing it? What is it? Well, we know that the what's behind it all is something called Louis bodies. But before I go into Louis bodies and what they're doing, how they affect the brain, we still don't have a good understanding of why this is happening in the first place. So we might know what the Louis bodies are doing to an extent.

But we're not still not sure why it is that it's happening. Like if you've got someone in your family that has a lower body dementia, you are more likely to have it if you carry some like the if your genes carry it. But we still don't understand why is it that this is happening.

Now let's talk about Lewybodies. So Lewybodies are a protein or an accumulation of a protein within certain cells, within neurons, which is called alpha-cynuclein. And this protein, this alpha-cynuclein is naturally occurring, but in the case of Lewybodies, there's a greater accumulation, and the protein has been like misfolding of proteins, so they're not folded properly, so it doesn't perform how it's supposed to perform.

So it's misfolded, and they're accumulating. And when there's excessive accumulation, you get this alpha-synuclein aggregation. And aggregation basically means that they're clustered together. And when they're clustered together, you get what's called a lewy body formation within a cell. Now, when that happens within the cell, you can cause the cells to die, and it can also disrupt communication from cell to cell. So that's obviously where you're getting all these problems.

and they believe that it's happening in brain regions involved with memory, motor control and cognition. So all the symptoms that I just spoke about, you can understand that that can obviously play into, you know, cognition, memory, motor control, all those things. Now, scientists believe, there's a lot of studies that's been done on it, as you can imagine, but they believe that it's associated with the loss or death of neurons in the brain that are in charge, this is the crucial thing, that are in charge of providing

these two neurotransmitters acetylcholine and dopamine. So acetylcholine is a neurotransmitter, which is really important, crucial for learning, and dopamine, which is very important for movement.

Also, it's important with mood, motivation, cognition, but it's very important with movement. That's why you're getting these tremors. That's why you're getting slowness in movement. And this is also what you see in Parkinson's disease. Parkinson's disease with lower bodies is also very common. And sometimes it's really difficult to pull apart dementia with lower bodies and Parkinson's disease with lower bodies. But it's this common theme of tremors or slowness.

in movement or an intentional trauma which is where you're reaching for something and that's where the trauma begins. So you're intending a movement and that's where the trauma begins or it can be a trauma at rest depending on which area of the brain is being affected or which neurons are being affected. So that in a very

small nutshell is what dementia with Lewy bodies is. So it is different and unique to the other different kinds of dementia, but the reason why it falls under the category of dementia is because it is a progressive and neurodegenerative disease that is primarily an age related.

disease. So hopefully I've wrapped that up as understandably as possible. As you can imagine, there is so much more behind that, but I just tried to wrap that up in like a five minute timeframe. Okay, let's get straight into the topic of today because there is a lot to talk about.

So what to do when it feels like nothing is going your way? Guys, I'm actually really excited for this episode because I have been in that position. I'll kind of elaborate on that in a little bit. And if you're a long time listener, you know exactly what I'm talking about. So I won't go into detail about my own personal experience, but I have for anyone who's relatively new and hasn't come across the story in the last 170, whatever episodes, I will brush over it again.

but I've been there. If you're going through this feeling right now, I have been there and it is the most painful yet in hindsight, most rewarding thing you can go through, okay? Doesn't feel like it right now, but hopefully by the end of this episode, you are filled with like a new wave, a new energy, a new lease of like, okay, yes, I'm gonna frame this differently. I'm gonna look at this situation differently. I'm gonna do something differently, okay?

Now, to begin, you probably know what I'm about to say, and that is that with everything in the brain, like attracts like, okay? It's easy to think of a similar thought than it is to think of an opposite thought of what you're thinking about.

The brain loves to reach for similar thoughts. We know that. We fucking know that. When you're bitching about someone, it's so hard to stop. Let's fucking be honest. When you're gossiping, it's so hard to stop gossiping. When you're laughing, it's hard to stop laughing. Whether it's good or whether it's bad, you're constantly reaching for similar thoughts. And if you're talking to someone who's on the same wavelength, it's this amazing bang, bang, bang, bang, ping, ponging back and forth. Whether it's a beautiful thing, whether it's comedy, whether it's talking about

heartbreaking things, you can just feed that cycle feed at feed at feed. But trying to think of an opposite thought is kind of like swimming against a current. You're forcing this positive thought against this barrage of negative thoughts or negative things that are happening to you at the time and it's exhausting. It feels like it's not sustainable and you end up burning out, you end up feeling flat. So you end up reverting back to your like thoughts, the thoughts that feel effortless because while they're not pleasant, at least they're effortless.

Then you've also got that thing called your reticular activating system, which is primed to look out for the things that you're focusing on. And it also blocks out other things. So if you're always focusing on the fact that all men are assholes, then of course, they're going to appear everywhere because you're primed to look out for it. If you want to buy a black jeep, you're going to start saying black jeeps way more often than before you wanted to buy a black jeep. And when this happens, it becomes really difficult to step back and look at the bigger picture.

We get so fixated on that one thing and wanting that one thing to work that we can't step back and think, wait a minute, there's all these other things that could be working for me. But I've been so fixated on this one thing having to work on when it's not worked out or when it's not worked out the way I've wanted it to work out. I'm feeling like nothing's working out. I'm feeling like a failure. I'm not looking at other avenues. I'm stuck here trying to make it work because it's my dream. It's what I promised myself.

and then you feel like nothing's working out for you because you're hitting your head against a brick wall. Okay, now I'm gonna go through a bunch of points that I want you to do. I don't know how many, it's a bunch, but let's begin. The first thing I want you to think about doing when you're in this position is I want you to break the cycle. Press pause and have some downtime. Just stop.

One of the hardest things to do is that when it feels like nothing's going your way, you're scrambling. So you're working harder at this, you're working harder at that, you're dropping the ball here, you're trying to pick up the ball over there and then you drop the ball here and the roll, and it's just chaos. Sometimes you just have to stop one thing. Sometimes you have to drop one subject or defer for a semester.

or stop trying to make a relationship work that's just, you know, where you're just not going to work and you know it. Or take a break from this dream that you're trying to pursue just to gain some clarity. Okay. Sometimes we think if we're going to go and take that break, we have quit and I'm not a quitter, but it's very different.

it's I need perspective and I cannot get perspective while I'm in the thick of it and I can't even surface to get a fucking breath of air. That's what you're doing. So I highly recommend that you break the cycle and press pause on a few. You don't have to pause everything, but press pause on the things that you're like, this is causing me so much grief right now. I just need, I need respite, okay?

Second thing you're going to do is when you've pressed pause, you want to regroup and you want to reassess. So you ask yourself, what has failed or what is not working?

What gives me anxiety? You could have a passion, right? You think, okay, I'm gonna do this with my life. This is the business I'm gonna start. This is the side hustle. And then you're working so hard at it. It's just not sticking. It's not working. And every time you go to work on it, instead of feeling fulfilled and empowered and excited, you end up feeling really anxious and really depressed about it every time you work on it, okay? So I want you to write down what has failed

what's not working and what does this mean? Okay? And then ask yourself, what do I really want? Because sometimes you're just cruising along, living the life that you're living because it's good enough, right? Or because you're in a situation that you kind of fell into without really kind of working for it or without really being like, that's what I want to do. You kind of just slipped into it through life experiences and through where life took you, where the current of life took you.

And it's not where you really wanted to go. But because it's not where you really wanted to go, you've kind of quote unquote settled. You might not really be happy. You might have some insecurities that you're kind of like shutting down and, you know, pushing away. But you're thinking,

Well, this is pretty good. You know, this is as good as it's going to get. So this is my life now. This is my life situation. I'm going to, you know, make do with that. And then that thing that you didn't even really want, it's just the life that you kind of you fell into, not the one that you had dreamed of in the past. And then even that fails.

then you feel even shitter because you think, what the fuck? I wasn't even living my dream life. And my non-dream life failed. Like it all fell apart and it wasn't even me living my best self. You're thinking, if I couldn't even make that fucking life work, how the fuck am I supposed to go out there and choose more dreams and make that work?

That's how you're feeling, right? It's like that whole thing that Jim Carrey says, you know, you can fail at something that you don't want. So why not try living a life that you do want? It's kind of that whole theory. So you could be in a situation where you're like, I can't believe this whole thing fell apart and it wasn't even my dream life, okay? So what I want you to do is regroup and reassess, say, what does this mean? And out of the things that's not going well for me in the life that I'm living,

What of it do I actually want and what was never something that I truly wanted anyway? Job wise, living wise, income wise, relationship wise, health wise, hobby wise.

Number three, I want you to grab a sheet of paper and write down categories at the top. I want you to write down relationships, career, health, and self. And in these categories, you can break them down into subcategories. Like in relationships, you can have romantic family and friends and colleagues. In career, you can have

job, if that could be split into two things, whether you have more than one job or whether you've got a job and then a career that you're working towards, or it might just be one category. Health, so that's physical health and mental health and spiritual health and whatever health you want to add in that category.

And then self. So that's things that you do to make yourself happy, things that you're working on for yourself, whether it's a passion project, whether it's a hobby, whether it's what you do in your spare time, things like that. Okay. So you're going to write them all down. Then I want you to do a one to five scale.

for each of those subcategories on how satisfied you are with those things. You make it a zero to five scale, zero being like I'm completely unsatisfied right now, and five being like best case scenario, I'm fucking thrilled, I would not want that to change. Number four, for anything that's categorized as two or below,

That needs to be changed immediately. You need to make some changes straight away, or you need to decide on what those changes are gonna be straight away. So identify these things, okay? For anything that is a five, I want you to write down at least two things, minimum, that you can do to keep nurturing that, okay? What can you do right now to keep nurturing those things that you're like, this is best case scenario, to really keep feeding that so it continues?

And for anything that's three or four, write down what you want to do, whether it's to improve it to get it to a five, or whether you no longer wish to invest so much time and energy into it, even though it's not that horrible. Like, I don't really want to work on it, but it's just my income. So I can't really get rid of it kind of thing.

like it might be something that you don't really want to work on anymore, but maybe you just do it because it's not really causing you any pain or acute suffering right now. So you just kind of do it and you just chip away at it on an on day in day out, but it's not actually like really filling your cup or it's not exactly what you wanted for your life.

Or it might be something that you're like, it's not that great, but I really want this and I want to improve at it for it to be great, okay? So write down which way you're gonna go with the things that are at a three or a four, okay?

Now number five, with what's the zero to zero one and two, identify what you can end or start to bring to an end today, today. There are certain things in your life that are not going to serve you at all.

Or there are certain things in your life that you need to end completely. And then in a few months, pick it up with fresh mind, fresh eyes, with a fresh heart, and approach completely differently. But it kind of needs to come to a fucking end for now. For example, I did this when I used to want to be an actor. I really wanted to be an actor, but I was in a really low place. I'll speak about the place I was in later. I was in a really low place.

And I just thought like every time I have to think about an order and and my agent like dropped me Everything went wrong for me one year and my agent dropped me my acting agent And I was like this is so far and while I was trying to find a new agent I was also on the brink of I had bought this one-way ticket to Europe was trying to find a new agent trying to get auditions for myself I was feeling so down and every time I thought about acting I had this wave of anxiety like I felt so like oh

So then I thought to myself, you know what, this is not fucking working and I can't turn it around. So I said to myself, I'm going to give myself a six month break. I'm not going to look up one audition. I'm not going to reach out to anybody. I'm not going to, nothing, these headshots are going in the band. And I'm just going to take a six month break. I took that six month break and I was willing to return to it with fresh eyes, but I'm like, I'm not going to revisit this thing until six months has lapsed. I'm going to take this time. I'm going to go to Europe. I'm going to just

just take a breath of fresh air and for me personally I found other things in that time that brought me more joy than acting ever did and so for me I realized that it wasn't exactly acting that I had to have it was a feeling that I was chasing that acting was that I thought acting would give me and it didn't and I'm not saying that I'll just quit and you'll find something different not at all I was willing to pick it up again when I had calmed down but for me personally I didn't need to do it however

What could have happened was take the six month break, release the tension that I have around it. And then in six months time, I could have picked it up and not had anxiety around it. So either way, it would have been a positive outcome. But for me, it allowed me to just realize that it wasn't serving me the way I thought it was serving me. And so I didn't feel the need to ever return again.

Number six, understand that what you want is not the only possibility for you. Sometimes you're honing in on something that's never going to work. Like I said about my acting thing for me, like it wasn't going to work the way I was going about it. Hey, I could have picked it up a year later and it actually, you know, fuck knows where my career would have gone. But the way I was going about it was never going to work.

And this is something, another thing, that when it comes to relationships, sometimes you're honing in on something so badly, like one person, one person, it's got to work with this person. And you don't realize that that's not the only possibility for you. You have limitless possibilities.

But you might be so fixated on this one thing. And then you've been told that if you work hard enough at it, then you'll get it. And I only half agree with that idea of like, you've got to work hard enough and then you'll get that thing that you're going for. It depends what we're talking about. I believe that if you work hard enough on you,

then you're gonna become super adaptable, super willing to learn and grow, super resilient, learn how to be vulnerable, and then you're actually gonna get way more out of life, success, and experiences than what you had set out to do. Sometimes the thing that you're going for is actually setting the bar not as high as you could actually end up going.

Sometimes we have this idea for what we want, and we've just set that idea, and we've locked it in, and we think, that's what I'm gonna get. I'm gonna, you know, we listen to all these motivational things, and we think, that's it, that's it, that's it. But we shut out all the other possibilities that are there for us. And we're so focused on this one possibility, one outcome, and it's gotta be that, and I'm gonna hustle, hustle, hustle.

And we don't look at all these other possibilities that our life experiences and our skillset and our resilience could lead us to. That would be potentially greater than that one thing that we're so fixated on. There are a million ways of getting to where you want to get to. And there are also a million other possibilities for what you can do with the skillset that you have with the person you are.

if you are focusing on the feeling or the outcome, okay? Because sometimes if you focus on the feeling that you're chasing or if you focus on, okay, I want, for example, I always wanted to do acting, right? And I always loved neuroscience. But then I thought, okay, what's the feeling that I want? Okay, I love performing, love talking, put me on a fucking stage immediately. I love, at times, not always, but I love attention as far as performance wise. I like, you know, having an audience.

But I also love science. I love to teach. I love to educate. And I was like, how the fuck do I join all that together? The podcast that came about. But here I was thinking, well, I'm going to have science or something that I love on the side and I'm not going to be an actor. But now for me, I actually have found best case scenario because I get to have my audience. I get to perform while I'm not even playing a different role. I'm just being me. I get to talk when I want to talk. I get to do everything I love doing.

And I get to do it 100% on my terms. I get to talk about science, which I fucking love, and I get to completely be myself and I don't have to, you know, take on the role of anything else. And I work for me. So for me, I'm like, wow, this is actually an outcome that I never even imagined as a possibility in the past, because I didn't even, I don't even think I even listened to podcasts, not even five years ago.

But you look at, this is a prime example of someone who had this thing that I really want to be successful as an actor. And then I found a career in a different path. And if you look at the outcome or the feeling that I was chasing, it's still a very similar feeling. It's this idea of performance. I want to have an audience. I want to be talking. I want to be, you know, all of that.

So sometimes you've got to think about, well, what is my skill set or what do I want my skill set to be? And what do I love doing? What's that feeling that I want? If I want to be successful in this, why? What is the feeling that I want to feel from that kind of success? And then realize that that feeling can be spread across all these other possibilities for you. So you might feel like nothing's working for me right now, but it's like, am I narrowing it down for myself way too much?

I want you to release the resistance. Lean into things that are working for you, but when you're fighting against something so hard, this is when you need to stop fighting. There is a difference between a soul destroying struggle and earned rewarding effort.

Okay? When you are earning something and putting in efforts and you're working towards something and it's this gradual thing, even if it's really hard, it's rewarding. There's a difference between that and hitting your head against a brick wall and just destroying your soul in the process and feeling horrendous and anxious about it. Okay? Big, big difference.

Number seven, don't limit yourself to only what you know or what you have so far experienced in your life or what you think you are capable of. The age thing is such a reason for people to not do certain things with their life. They think, oh my God, it's...

I'm too old. Now I'm in my 30s or I'm in my 70s or I'm in my whatever. What people consider to be old age is so personal because a lot of the messages that I get about people worrying about things being too late for them are from people in their 20s. And that just shows you that it's this fear that is like prevalent in so many people no matter where in your life you are at. I look at my 20s and it feels like so long ago and it feels like...

Life times have been lived in between then and now and I'm now 33. You know, it's crazy how much can change in one year, in three years, in ten years. But if you're always looking at your life as like, oh, fuck, this is my destiny and I feel old, so I could never change it. So now this is as good as it's going to get. So what am I going to do with it? And it's all falling apart. Don't limit yourself to only what you know.

Sometimes in your darkest hour, in your most painful moment where it feels like nothing is going your way, that is when you discover who you are. You discover things about yourself, amazing things about yourself that you probably never would have discovered had it not been for this difficult time. This now is your opportunity.

This is the reset that you've been waiting for but probably not wanting. And now you've got the opportunity to rewrite the next phase of your life, the way that you want it to go. There's no real failure unless you want to label it as a failure. That's your choice. You make that call if you want to label it as a failure or not. No one else can make that call. You make that call. And you have the opportunity to expand what your possibilities are.

You can get as creative as you want to get. Don't be shy with yourself. Reinvent yourself and then reinvent yourself again and again and again. And I know for a fact that you can do it. And sometimes when it feels like nothing is going right, it's easier to reinvent yourself than when everything's going right except one thing.

Because sometimes when we're in a position of like, Oh, all these things are going right. Oh, but not step step foot wrong here, but not take that risk because the way we calculate wins and losses is very skewed. We're always way more fearful to lose something than we are willing to be vulnerable and gain something. So sometimes when you're in a position where you feel like nothing's working for you and it's all fucked, that's kind of a very special and enhanced site. Awesome place to be.

Number eight, create a new purpose to lean into as much as you can during this time. Now I'm going to quickly tap into the time where it felt like nothing was going my way.

Gone through a breakup, I had gone to the US and then I had come back and I kind of was rekindling something with an ex and I thought it was back on and it was all well and good and then that fell apart and I had just come back from the US. The thing with my ex had completely fallen apart and I was blindsided and so heartbroken. I didn't have a job. I had to borrow money from my sister just to pay bond for a bedroom in a three bedroom home with housemates.

I didn't have a vehicle at all. I literally had like no money in my bank account. Didn't know what I wanted to do with my life. Kind of was at like a standstill. I was heartbroken. I had just found this place and I had to borrow money from my sister just to even get the fucking bedroom. And I was like,

I cannot believe that I'm nearly 30 and I find myself in this position. And I felt hopeless. I felt fucking hopeless, okay? And I was frustrated and annoyed at myself and heartbroken. And that's when I started the master's degree. I had already applied for it and I had deferred it for a year and I was about to defer it again. But I thought, I'm in a place right now where I am not okay. And this is the one thing that deep down I've wanted to do for years.

So I thought this can be my thing that's going to pull me out of this feeling of desperation because I know I want it. I just don't know if I'm capable of it because I feel so lost and heartbroken. So that became my driving force. That became my purpose. And I lent into it fucking hard. And it was amazing because I was doing something that I'd loved. I had no idea if I was ever going to be able to use it for a career or not. I hoped, but I had no idea.

But I knew I loved it. And I started doing it, and it was hard work, but it was fucking fascinating. And that was my saviour, that degree.

saved me because I put so much of my energy and time and love and passion into it, it became my purpose. And it literally pulled me out of where I was. And my mood changed, everything changed. Was it easy? No, it wasn't easy. But did it really change my perspective on my life situation? 100% it did massively.

When I was down, I would have this thing that would help me keep going and going and going. It was helping me grow. It turned me into a new person because I grew so much that I could never even fathom looking back and reverting back to my old self because that old self felt so far away. I had grown. I had seen possibilities. I had learnt things. It was just fucking amazing.

Countless people have done this with so many things. You see it with, okay, this is one person called Fauja Singh. I think I've pronounced his name right, I don't know. Fauja Singh. And he's a man who ran kind of like an amateur on and off in his life. He enjoyed running.

But then had stopped running for decades. And after the death of his son, when he was 89 years old, he became really, really depressed. So then he decided to take up running again, which he hadn't done for a very long time. And he started training at 89. And it became his passion. It became his purpose in life and his focus. And he became truly, truly happy. And then at 93, guys, 93,

He ran his first marathon, he broke the record for his age bracket, and he continued to run marathons past the age of 100. So he found his way to get him through his darkest days. He had a passion, he turned that into his purpose, and he pulled himself out of his depression, and he had that, and that was the thing that carried him through. So it doesn't have to be a career thing, it could be a movement-related goal, it could be

Something to do with reading you could become a memory athlete whatever it is But something that can pull you out of that darkest hour because it is a way of growing you It is a purpose that you have and that's your driving thing when you're feeling so down Okay, I might not know you guys who are listening personally, but I fucking

do understand my audience very, very well. I do understand you guys very well. I understand your dreams for yourself. I understand your fears, understand your pain and your insecurities and your heartbreaks, your confusion around your life and what your purpose is and what you're going to do with your life. I have read countless stories from you guys where you have turned things around for yourself by changing how you look at things and changing how you approach things.

And I can tell you that based on the amount of people that have messaged me and told me stories of how they've turned their life around, I know that all of you are capable of doing that. Here's another example. I think my cousin has actually spoken about this on the podcast, but my cousin, Giselle,

She had a similar situation, but probably a bit more annoying. So she was doing acting and she went over to the US for, I think it was a month. And in that time, she was trying to do acting. Things weren't working for her. She was feeling really down. She comes back to Australia, decides then and there that she's going to quit acting. She then breaks up with her long-term partner. Well, like the relationship fell apart, I should say.

then had to break the lease, didn't have a job because she quit her job before she went to the States, and then moved back home with her parents, so we're saying no job, broke the lease, no relationship, has just quit acting, which is her passion outside of her job, has moved back home with her parents, and then COVID hit, so we're all in lockdown. And she was like, are you fucking kidding me? She was in a low fucking place. And she was 30 at the time. Yeah, 30.

And she was like, this is fucked. In one year, in one year, she had a job that she loved. She was feeling fucking amazing. She has this epic legendary partner who she had moved in with. Everything had turned around in the span of one year.

And this didn't just happen miraculously. She was doing a lot of work on herself. She was doing a lot of work on herself emotionally, mentally. She started her degree in writing. She started like all sorts of things. You know, physically she was started training more, which is obviously great for your mental health. She started doing all these things and putting herself out of her comfort zone hard. And in the span of 12 months, that is what manifested for her. Well, I wouldn't say manifested for her. That's what she created for herself.

It's incredible. So here you have examples. That's already two people in one family, me, Giselle, all these people. Do you know how many examples there are around you? The people are just so scared to talk about the time when they are most down because it's terrifying to be like, I'm at my lowest. Hi, everyone. Hi. I'm at my fucking lowest. I've hit rock bottom. No one wants to do that because it's so painful to talk about and you feel so vulnerable and exposed and you feel like a failure.

We feel shame around it because we feel that we've, you know, we haven't succeeded at what we're trying to do, but it happens all the time. And there are examples around you all the time of people who have reached a point where they're like, I'm at a stage in my life where I thought I'd have everything sorted out and I have nothing sorted out and how you can turn that around in the span of 12 months.

I've got stories of single parents that have moved homes or cities, changed jobs or careers, found hobbies, started a degree, become passionate about life again, all by changing how they approach, how they're going to look at it, by becoming the leader in their own life, owning what they can own,

taking accountability for what they can and discarding what was never in their control in the first place and just taking action on the things that they said they were going to take action on. So many inspiring stories from you guys. So I know you guys have it in it. It's never all lost. It's never all for a waste. Everything you've experienced up until now is at the very least has been to teach you something and to make you more resilient, more wise,

and able to tackle other things in your life through a different lens. Remember, if you have your mind, you have it all because you are capable of steering your mind in the direction that you want your life to go. For some, it happens faster than you can imagine. And for other people, it takes a little bit of practice and a bit of trial and error, but everyone is able to steer their mind in the direction that they want it to go.

I adore you guys, I have your back and my wish for you is that you're in a position right now where you don't feel anymore that all is lost.

If you start putting into practice these things, you can look back in 12 months and think, fuck, I'm so grateful I went through that phase to get to where I am today. I'm so grateful I felt like I was hitting rock bottom because look at where I am today. It's such an exciting feeling to look back, look back 12 months and think

fuck look how i turned shit around for myself it's a very exciting feeling and i know that everyone has it in them guys thank you so much for listening to this episode today love you guys so much go out there first first rest and reset take that break rest and reset press the pause button stop resisting stop swimming against the current regroup

and then go out and fucking take action. Love you guys so much, as always remember be kind to yourself, be kind to your brain, don't take shit from anyone and especially don't take shit from yourself, don't care.