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    The Power of Committing Time to Growth (with Danny Miranda) Pt.1 - July ‘23 | Ep 610

    enSeptember 23, 2023

    Podcast Summary

    • Understanding Others' ExperiencesEmpathy and forgiveness come from understanding others' struggles. Hating and understanding someone at the same time are incompatible. Our circumstances shape our perspectives.

      Understanding others and their experiences can help us empathize and forgive. Alex Formose shared a personal story from his college days when he wrote about his mother's psychological struggles. Through this assignment, he gained new insights into his mother's life and the pressures she faced. This experience taught him that hating someone and understanding them at the same time are incompatible. He also realized that if we were born with the same circumstances as someone else, we might see the world the same way they do. These insights have stayed with Alex and influenced his communication style, which aims to provide value and understanding to his audience.

    • Understanding Others' Perspectives Reduces AngerEmpathy and perspective-taking help manage anger and improve relationships by reducing emotional reactions and fostering compassion. Mental models like zooming out and considering long-term insignificance can also help decrease the stakes of situations.

      Empathizing with others' perspectives can help reduce anger and improve relationships. The speaker shares how an introductory psychology assignment changed their perspective towards their mother, leading to a less contentious relationship. They explain how understanding someone's background and experiences can help reduce emotional reactions and foster compassion. The speaker also suggests mental models, such as zooming out and considering the long-term insignificance of current issues, to help decrease the stakes of situations and promote a more rational response. Overall, the key takeaway is that empathy and perspective-taking are powerful tools for managing anger and improving relationships.

    • Changing our expectations can transform challenges into opportunitiesBy adjusting our expectations and reframing problems as opportunities, we can find peace and even benefit from seemingly negative circumstances.

      Our perception of challenges and circumstances largely depends on our expectations. The speaker suggests that if we can change our expectations, we may find that what once seemed like a problem is actually a long-term benefit. Using the example of the man and the horse, a seemingly negative situation (a broken foot) can lead to a positive outcome (being unable to go to war and missing being recruited). The speaker also encourages acceptance of reality and suggests that trying to change the universe to meet our expectations is futile. Instead, we should focus on adjusting our own perspectives. By reframing problems as opportunities or even neutral occurrences, we can reduce our emotional response and find peace in the present moment. Additionally, the speaker suggests that the way we label situations as "good" or "bad" is subjective and may depend on our individual circumstances. Over the long term, it may be more productive to focus on the fact that things simply happen, rather than trying to ascribe a value to them. Overall, the takeaway is to approach challenges with a flexible mindset, recognizing that our expectations play a significant role in how we experience and respond to situations. By adjusting our expectations and reframing problems as opportunities, we can find peace and even benefit from seemingly negative circumstances.

    • The power of persistence and consistencySuccess often requires more effort and time than initially anticipated. Don't get discouraged by early setbacks, keep going and stay consistent.

      Persistence and consistency are key to success, even when the results may not be immediate. The speaker shares a personal story about distributing flyers for his business and getting discouraged when he only received one call and a complaint. His mentor helped him understand that he hadn't tested the approach enough, as he had only distributed 300 flyers instead of the suggested 5,000. This experience taught him that success often requires putting in more effort and time than initially anticipated. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of not getting discouraged by early setbacks and remembering that hard work and consistency are essential components of achieving one's goals.

    • The key to world-class outcomes is consistent, high-level effortTo achieve exceptional results, put in more effort than others and maintain consistency until there's nothing more to improve.

      The difference between mediocre and world-class outcomes often lies in the amount of effort put in, not just the doubling or tripling of it. An experienced entrepreneur, for instance, might need to put in 30 times more effort than a newcomer to achieve the same level of success. This principle applies to various domains, such as product iteration, video editing, and writing a book. Exceptional work takes great struggle, and the key to unlocking the big wins in life is often found in consistency, not complexity. For example, the speaker put in over 2,000 hours into writing his book, which eventually sold thousands of copies per month without any paid advertising. The key to achieving world-class outcomes is to persist and maintain a high level of effort until there's nothing more that can be improved.

    • Investing extra time and effort leads to exceptional resultsPutting in extra effort upfront can lead to significantly better outcomes in the long run, whether in writing a book or creating a product. Exceptionalism often comes from unseen input, and investing more time and energy can lead to a larger impact and a lasting legacy.

      Putting in extra effort upfront can lead to significantly better results in the long run, whether it's in writing a book or creating a product. The speaker shared an example of how he spent an excessive amount of time on a single page of his book to make it exceptional, and the impact it had on his audience. He emphasized that exceptionalism often comes from the input that people don't see, and that investing more time and energy into creating something great can lead to a larger impact and a lasting legacy. Additionally, the speaker encouraged listeners to help spread the word about the podcast to support more entrepreneurs and create better experiences for customers.

    • The benefits of long-term thinkingTo become a long-term thinker, focus on breaking down big projects into manageable tasks, creating multiple ways to win, and finding short-term success while working towards long-term goals.

      Becoming a long-term thinker is a skill that can be developed over time. The speaker shares how his standards for great work have raised over the years, and the more he puts into a project, the more positive feedback he receives. However, this obsession can also lead to the risk of investing too much time and energy into one thing, potentially leading to burnout or disappointment if the outcome doesn't meet expectations. The concept of delayed gratification, as seen in the marshmallow test, can be applied here. The ability to wait longer for a reward is a sign of strong impulse control and long-term thinking. To intentionally become a long-term thinker, one needs to figure out what to do in the meantime. Patience alone is not enough, and experts don't necessarily have more impulse control. Instead, they find ways to win in the short term while working towards their long-term goals. Breaking down large projects into manageable chunks and creating multiple ways to win are effective strategies for long-term success.

    • Investing more time leads to better outcomesLonger time investment in projects leads to more creative solutions and thorough issue resolution, resulting in better outcomes

      Putting in more time and effort into a project or goal leads to better outcomes. The speaker emphasizes that there are many variables involved in human behavior, and shortcuts cannot replace the necessary work. The longer time invested in something allows for more creative solutions to arise and for potential issues to be addressed thoroughly. The speaker uses the example of planning a successful product launch over a long period of time to illustrate this concept. While there may be diminishing returns on the input of work, the outsized return on each increment of improvement can lead to significant differences in outcomes. Ultimately, the speaker encourages embracing the process and putting in the necessary effort to achieve desired outcomes.

    • The work demands dedication and consistent effortStarting work immediately and seeking expert feedback can help one become proficient in a skill and surpass others

      The key to achieving greatness in any field, whether it's writing business books or mastering a skill, is to confront and put in the required work. The work doesn't care about who you are or your background, but it demands dedication and consistent effort. As the speaker mentioned, it takes approximately 20 hours of concentrated effort to become proficient in a skill. However, many people waste time by delaying the start of their work. By acknowledging the need to do something and starting immediately, one can make significant progress and surpass those who wait. Feedback from experts is also crucial for improvement, as it helps individuals gain proficiency and avoid stagnation. Ultimately, the work itself is the separator between the extraordinary and the ordinary.

    • Consistent effort and feedback lead to skill developmentDedicate time and energy to skill development through consistent effort and honest self-evaluation for growth in sales or content creation

      Developing a skill, whether it's sales or content creation, requires consistent effort and feedback. Mister Beast's ability to quickly grow his following is a result of the skills he's honed over time, not just his natural talent. Similarly, improving communication skills takes repetition and refinement. Sales and content creation both offer fast feedback cycles, allowing individuals to learn and adjust quickly. However, it's important to be honest with oneself about what worked and what didn't, and not to get discouraged by false successes or false feedback. Overall, committing time and energy to skill development is the key to becoming more articulate and successful.

    • The importance of consistent effort and learning attitudeEven with slow progress, maintaining a consistent effort and learning attitude can lead to eventual success. Focus on progress, not immediate outcomes, and be open to feedback.

      Consistent effort and a good learning attitude are key to growth, even if progress seems slow at first. The speaker shared his experience of producing a podcast for four years without significant growth, but he eventually started learning and improving, leading to eventual success. He emphasized the importance of meta skills, such as learning how to learn, which can help individuals absorb information quickly and become proficient in various areas. The speaker also suggested focusing on progress rather than immediate outcomes and being open to feedback from those who have already achieved success in the desired field.

    • The importance of a long-term perspective and continuous improvementShift mindset to focus on progress and improvement, gain valuable insights through observation, and believe in the power of continuous learning

      Having a long-term perspective and focusing on continuous improvement are key to success. The speaker shared how he was used to working with clients who expected immediate returns and had never encountered anyone talking about a 10-year time horizon. However, after observing the speaker's approach to YouTube, he shifted his mindset and realized that progress and getting better are the most important things. He emphasized that if one is not improving, they may need better feedback to bridge the knowledge gap and eventually the effort gap. The speaker also reflected on his past jobs and realized that none of them directly taught him business skills, but he learned through observation and gained valuable insights that he only understood in hindsight. He concluded by rejecting the concept of being a born entrepreneur and believing that people get better at things they are reinforced for doing. Overall, the importance of having a long-term perspective and continuously improving was a valuable lesson that resonated with the speaker.

    • The fear of quitting a stable job can be overwhelming for those who have always followed instructionsThose who have experienced failure find it easier to take risks and chart their own course, while those who have always followed instructions may find the fear of quitting a stable job overwhelming

      The fear of quitting a stable job, even with significant savings, can be overwhelming for those who have always been rewarded for following instructions. This fear is less pronounced for those who have experienced failure and have had to learn to rely on their own abilities and resources. The speaker's experience of quitting a prestigious white-collar job at a young age, despite having savings, was the most terrifying moment of his life due to the lack of previous experience in taking such a bold step. This fear stemmed from the fact that he had always been rewarded for following the path set out for him. The experience of entrepreneurs who have failed and then started their own businesses may be different, as they have not been rewarded for following the traditional path and therefore find it easier to take risks and chart their own course.

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    How to Really Know Another Person

    How to Really Know Another Person

    So often, we think we know what other people are thinking. But researchers have found that our attempts at reading other people go wrong more often than we realize.  This week, we talk with psychologist Tessa West about what we can all do to read people more accurately.

    If you like today's show, be sure to check out last week's conversation about emotions, and how they're shaped by where we live. And if you'd like to support our work, you can do so at support.hiddenbrain.org.