Hey Boo Hey, first off we want to thank you for listening to The Dove. And now, we want to hear from you. I want to hear everything. Tell me what you learned, what's sticking with you, what questions you still have, and what you're motivated to do as a result of listening. I hope you save and please be saving.
Right now, you can take our short survey to help us better understand the impact of our work. And even better, once you complete the survey, baby, you could get some money. You could enter for a chance to win a $100 Visa gift card, yes. The survey is short and sweet and will help us keep bringing you content that you love. Take the survey at bit.ly slash the dough survey. Thank you again.
Hi, I'm Rosh Misajani, founder of Girls with Code. Look, I'd consider myself a pretty successful adult woman. I've written books, founded two successful nonprofits, and I'm raising two incredible kids. But here's the thing, I still wake up wondering, is this it?
And if the best years are yet to come, when's that gonna start? Join me on my so-called midlife, my new podcast with Lemonata Media, where we're building a playbook for navigating midlife, one episode at a time. Each week, I'll chat with extraordinary guests who've transformed their midlife crisis into opportunities for growth and newfound purpose.
At some point, we all ask ourselves, is there more to life? I'm here to discover how to thrive in my second act, right alongside you. My so-called bed life is out now, wherever you get your podcasts.
Welcome back to The Dough, a podcast about the women who get their bag while pushing around a whole ass stroller. That's right, I'm talking about the work and mamas that do it all and don't get enough credit or time off. Here's the deal, pregnancy and postpartum are supposed to be a beautiful time when you're surrounded by love and support.
But you know what can really throw off the vibe? HR telling you that there's no maternity leave, or your boss interrupting your milk pumping session, or your co-worker shaming you for taking so many breastfeeding breaks and the list goes on. Well ladies, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret your employer doesn't want you to know.
You have maternal rights and you don't have to sacrifice motherhood to climb that corporate ladder. Let me introduce you to someone who's ferociously defending all the mamas out there against giants like Amazon and Walmart pushing for legislation and helping enforce the laws of equity. Entering the chat, the mom attorney.
Daphne Delvo runs the nation's first and only law firm committed to workplace rights for mothers. She's an award winning employment lawyer and considered to be the expert on all things pregnancy and postpartum discrimination. Daphne's out here making the laws less boring and winning her clients six to seven figure settlements. I know that's right. Now I know the court hates to see her coming.
Oh, y'all better act right. Daphne, welcome to the dough. Hey, hello, how are you? Yes! Okay, so let's get into it. First question I'm going to start with is on the dough, we always ask, what is something you spent your money on that brought you joy this week? I bought a really bougie laundry detergent. You have to.
Yeah, because I've been buying kind of the cheap version because I have little kids and we do so much laundry. So I splurged on this super bougie laundry detergent for my own clothes.
Oh, I love it. That's such a mom and you. You're like, listen, you guys can get the gold, spec, powder, laundry detergent, and mommy will just throw some water in there and pray it out. You're such a mom, the best mom. Okay, so you have to tell us, what is the name of the laundry? What does it smell like? I might want to buy it. What is it? Yeah, it's by a brand called Ritual, and it's like a Japanese cherry blossom scent.
So it's very sweet. I'm very excited. I haven't tried it yet, but it's my own. It's a gift that I bought for myself. Yes. Your mom, what did you buy yourself? Oh, I just bought some laundry detergent. It's bougie. That's really where we're at. That's where you're at post-30, for sure. Yes. Also a very bougie dishwashing
sponge. I don't know why I'm all into. I'm not a very domesticated person. So I'm kind of surprised to actually hear myself say these things. But apparently these are the things that excite me. Oh my gosh. I used to hitchhike to Burning Man and here I am geeking out about like the newest sponge.
Are you kidding me my Dyson vacuum when people came over and I like made tacos I was like guys I got a new vacuum So I felt like I was on that episode of Lucy when she was just like I should tell you what I'm gonna do when she was acting like that Salesman and she just like threw something on the floor then went to go like scoop it up. No truly. This is 30
Yeah, and also I did also buy myself a super nice suit. So I have range period, but it's like a full velvet green suit. We love that for you. Yeah, because most lawyers are they look quite boring and uniform with their black and their gray and their dark blue. So I always try to wear actual colors and
do things like make jokes and smile among them, which really throws them off. So I'm going to be showing up with my velvet suit and see how I can disrupt the industry. Yes. Well, I love how you said that because that segues into what we're here to fucking talk about.
Okay, I respect you so much. If you guys didn't know, Daphne owns the only firm that is about women's rights, like as far as like mommies and the lack of maternity leave, the lack of support that we have.
Um, and, and I don't want to tell fake news. Is it just moms or is it women? Let's just say general. Yeah. Just women. Okay. Okay. Cause you're not like, you know, a life coach or that's just like, Hey, you know, buy this class, you know, that I took and, you know, and, and, and earn a thousand dollars. And then you have two other people that you give a thousand. It's basically a multi-level marketing scheme. That's not what you're doing. Like you have a deep understanding of the law. You did not just like,
you know, skim a fucking, you know, blog and was like, now I'm going to go for women's rights. So I have to know what led you to practice law. Yeah, I'm a nerd. I love learning. Yeah, no, I am an ultra nerd. I love learning. I mean, I could read a case
from the 17th century common law and get super excited and like try to talk to everyone about it. And everyone's like, what are you doing? This is very boring to me. So, and specifically, I love the law because it is a powerful tool when used for protection. I also recognize that the law can be weaponized against us, but the only way to kind of fight back is to use our own powers and our own rights.
And one thing that we have in the United States is a civil justice system where you get to sue people who harm you, including employers who push you out for being a woman or being a person of color. And I like to use that power generously. So I like to remind folks that they have rights that they have power when they feel really powerless.
So what led me to this field is I, my own experience as a woman moving through the labor market as I think a lot of us move through sexual harassment discrimination and we just kind of like laugh it off we kind of pretend it's not there we kind of often think it's
It's just the name of the game and you know like we have no power, what are we going to do it's just a little me. And then I became a lawyer and really realized the power that the law has and I started working in employment law cases. Became a trial lawyer did equal pay trials and a lot of sexual harassment cases.
And then through my own experience as a mother, I started to see just how tired the moms are. So they get routinely pushed out of their jobs. They're not given time with their kids, but they're also too tired to do something about it. Because the whole process of taking on the rulers, the lords of capitalism is exhausting. Like not only are you wrong, you also have to sit a grown-ass man down and tell him why he wronged you. So there's kind of this double emotional labor.
And in the end, they just try to gaslight you anyway. So what I try to do is I'm trying to be a bridge between these systems of power, this empire that I know really well. And I know how to think, I know how to strategize, I know how they move against us. And then I also help the mothers actually use
these powers against the empire. So I'm just a bit of a rebel, I would say a bit of a revolutionary, but done with like a, yeah, a green velvet suit and with kindness and compassion. But I have a deep fondness for mothers in America because of how Acreste Arza is a group.
There is a lack of support when you compare to other countries. There's a lack of childcare support. There's a lack of healthcare, black maternal mortalities, really high rates. So I try to see what can be done. You know, there's so much that we need, but what can be done right now today? What are some of the things you can do? You can say.
that will actually make an impact in your life that will make you feel less hopeless, that will actually protect your children, protect yourself, protect your wealth by using these kind of old school legal tactics. So it's just kind of marrying the job of a trial lawyer, which is
very old boys club with like a new fresh approach to lead the revolution. As you were talking it just made me think of this episode on Girlfriends because Tracy Ellis Ross character was a lawyer and with another guy named William Den and she was just like I don't know what I'm doing like I'm a lawyer but I don't have a life he said real lawyers don't have a life we have law.
That's what it seems like when you're like the way that you're talking it's like no I don't fuck that what I'm buying laundry detergent I have laundry detergent I have law That's what that's why I feel like as an artist like but I don't give a fuck what I have I have my art What are you talking about like this is what yes?
This is what gets me up in the morning. This is how I think, breathe, move, and have my being is my work. Like, I love what I do. And I can see that in you. And I want to know, like, in the world of what you were talking about, the ways that mothers are not treated fairly in this country, women, black people, people of color, right? How did you see managers and companies just outright violating employment law?
So when I was working at an employment law firm, I just saw that it was almost only women coming to us and a lot of women of color. And so I created a whole law firm oriented towards women and women's rights. Because I just. Pause. Pause. Pause. I love how like, OK, so there's issues. OK, well, I'll start a firm.
I love that, I love that. You see a problem, we present a solution. Women! Yes. I just love, I just like, we have to pause. Cause you just said that like, yeah, my kids were hungry, so we just went to Olive Garden. Yeah, they just went to get some, it's like, no, Daphne, excuse me. Hello, that's a whole business that requires so much work. Yes. And were you a mother at that point? Yes, I just had a lot of baby, in fact.
Okay, okay, keep going. I just we just had to put a pin in that we're not going to gloss over that like that wasn't a huge monumental thing that you did in response to a problem. Okay, go ahead. I really appreciate this. Yeah, I created a whole lot from first of its kind oriented towards women and really focusing on women's issues. And because I speak about motherhood a lot, I had a lot of moms come to me else had some equal paycases and sexual harassment. But
So much of it was related to motherhood. And the way that this plays out in the workplace is that essentially the demands of capitalism and the demands of motherhood are fundamentally at odds. So motherhood requires us to stay home to hold our babies, to breastfeed our babies to. And that doesn't mean we lose our ambitions, but there's always going to be some time where our focus is needed with that new human we just created. And society doesn't support that and set
Capitalism says, give back to work. Like, I don't care if you're bleeding. I don't care if that baby's crying. Give the baby to someone else. Like, I need your hands to serve me. That's what the Lords of Capitalism say. They start to actually compete with the mother for her attention. They start to compete with her children and her baby. And they're always going to try to maximize the time spent as work at work, which they do by minimizing the time spent at home.
specifically what that looks like is denying requests for flexibility, denying requests for time off, denying requests to go to a doctor because they have KPIs to meet. And this is a completely counter unnatural approach towards physiology and human being and creating life because
When you look at animals, animals don't have to drop a litter and then get back to work. We are all just standing around and going, oh, this is so adorable. This is a nursing baby. I saw a giraffe. I saw a giraffe have a baby. First of all, I came out there, but I said, I went to the women giraffes. The baby came out of her ass. There's a giraffe.
There's a face drop. And then it just drops. She looks back at it. She's like, all right now, okay, you better get up. I'ma go. That's how I feel like us as women. We're like women giraffes. We drop the baby. I'm like, all right, get your ass up. Time to go back to work. Pretty much. Get back to work. It's like that.
So y'all know I am holiday-cracy, okay? I am all about the decor, the music, and of course, the food. That includes eating all the holiday chocolate in my kitchen, but after everything settles down, I know I should get back into eating a little healthier. That's why I love Thrive Market. They make it so easy to find snacks that are better for me. One of my favorite features is the healthy swap scanner in the Thrive Market app.
I just scan a product I love and the app shows me cleaner, healthier alternatives. So I can swap my regular chocolate for unreal peanut butter cups or Thrive Market's non-GMO chocolate cover marshmallows. Thrive Market also takes the guesswork out of finding safe, healthy food.
All their products are 100% non-GMO and free from over 1,000 harmful ingredients. Plus, their on-site filters make it easy to shop by your dietary needs. Whether you're looking for a peanut-free snack, slow sugar options, or high-protein meal ideas, Thrive Market has you covered.
Ready for a junk-free start to 2025? Head to thrivemarket.com slash dough and get 30% off your first order plus a free $60 gift. That's T-H-R-I-V-E market.com slash dough thrivemarket.com slash dough.
Want a sneak preview of hot new audio books? Then check out Your Next Listen, a new podcast from Lemonade Media and Simon & Schuster Audio. We've got everything, the hottest new thrillers, best-selling celebrity memoirs, and swoonie romances. And these aren't tiny clips either. They're entire chapters you can listen to. Your next listen is out November 11th, wherever you get your podcasts.
So I want to know first, how does pregnancy and motherhood impact women's earning potential? Like if you have examples of that? Yeah, I have some data for you, because I'm a nerd. Whatever you can legally share, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I have some data from the National Women's Law Center. So when a woman becomes a mother, her earnings go down, and here's the fun part. When a man becomes a dad, his earnings go up.
So the highest earners are actually dads and the lowest earners are black moms at 52 cents to the dollar compared to white dads. That's half.
Um, and you know, because the employers are like, oh, he's a dad. Now he needs to provide. And with the moms, it's like, oh, well, I'm going to write her off. So yeah, it's a, it's an at least 15% reduction in earning per child's, which comes out to an average $20,000 a year. And, um, uh, black women, black mothers,
lose up to $1.3 million for the course of their career through because of the wage differential. That's like a whole mansion that capitalism
patriarchy, rops of black moms, like steals. Do you have any examples though, Daphne, of any clients that you've had, like, you know, like, what's like the craziest story that you experienced with a woman or mother in the workplace experiencing these discriminatory practices at work?
There's so many there. I would say the saddest one was a woman who actually lost a baby and then the job firing her on the same day of like, Oh, you know, like they just didn't want to deal with her time off requests. And yeah, I see this with women who lose babies or pregnancies and then also lose their jobs.
Cause it's a man that the company just can't handle it. It's like, it just, uh, it's like a glitch in their fucking matrix. They're just like, wait, I have to, I have to give her a time off. Like she just experienced a death. Yeah. Yeah. Inside. So just, mm hmm. So I see that. And then I see, I, one of the worst ones I saw was a mother who, this is a,
a Latina mom who was pregnant during the pandemic. And all of the executives were working from home, but they actually really tried to get her to quit. But because it's really hard for a company to just fire a pregnant woman because they know that that's a little bit stupid. But instead what they do is they make it really hard. So what they did is they had her come in when everyone else was home and they had her clean using like toxic fumes and she was pregnant.
And then she refused to quit because she needed money. So she and she needed health care. So she was doing these cleaning jobs while pregnant. And then because she refused to quit, they end up firing her at 39 weeks pregnant. And then she was taken off the health care plant instantly. Then she actually had to give birth without medical insurance.
And she had a medical debt of $100,000 and she ended up also being a child with a lot of severe health issues. So our jobs are so tied to our survival and our baby survival. So it's a really vulnerable time for a woman. And it's also a very cruel time to mistreat a woman because she doesn't have any options. She needs to often stay at the job depending on her kind of conditions and circumstances. But those are some of the things
that come on my desk of women whose lives have been completely ruined by their employers' lack of compassion and humanity. Daphne, within that last situation, both were extremely disgusting and traumatic. But for that last one, how did you go about exposing the company for this? So we sued them for wrongful termination.
And then we worked the case for about a year and then it resolved. She had a really, really good settlement. So at the end, she did get paid. And that's what our system allows, right? It's like you break the rules and then you pay just like when there's a burglar in your house and then you call the cops, like it's the same system of like you, they robbed you. She was robbed of time, of money, of
uh, emotional fortitude of all of the things, you know, of having a real bonding experience with her child. Um, so, so yeah, we suit them. And this is, so this is what I do. This is part of my job is getting mothers paid and that can add up. It can be around seven figures and then I help them infested so that they, their kids don't have to pay for college and they, they don't have student debt. So it can, it can lift a family out of poverty and create generational wealth for, for the whole family.
when we set up these cases well. So that's kind of the, you know, the good news here is that there is a system of recurrection here and that it looks like getting paid. It looks like the company writing you a check. I'm so happy that you mentioned a million. Okay. Seven figures because I want to get into that. I know that you helped fight
a pregnancy discrimination case that resulted in winning a million dollars. So I would love to relive this victory with you because I know we've talked about things that are kind of like grim and very sad, but this is a huge win. You know, you just talked about that last case and you won and clearly Daphne is a winner winner, right? So tell me about the case that led you to win a million dollars.
Yeah, so this was a mother who was pregnant and her manager was really sad to get her. Like she was so upset about it. She's like, how dare you? And this was a female manager. How dare you do this to me? I don't want to care about your stupid baby, like calling her baby stupid and then asking a lot of invasive questions about like, well, like is your vagina dilated when she was close to giving birth and then like just refusing to give her any time off saying, I don't want you to
Take any time off because we've all of these things going on and just speaking about her baby and her pregnancy in a really cross way saying like this is what we get for hiring women, we should just hire men and you know I this is so inconvenient to us and
Yeah, like this isn't my problem. And just, yeah, it just became worse and worse and worse. And the, my client was also demoted, taken off her job and just put in a totally different job that was really less interesting and a lot more boring. And what made the case a million dollar case is that she had reported it to HR.
many, many times in writing, she had done her job, which means she reported it, she kept a record of it, and HR just didn't do anything about it. Like they just made it worse, they just continued to punish her. And then the owners also made it worse. So when it reaches that kind of upper level management and management isn't correcting it, HR isn't correcting it,
That's when you get into those really big range numbers, because then you have a company that's really like maliciously oppressing mothers intentionally, nefariously, and that's when you are able to get some of the bigger payouts. Yes, HR can be, what's the word I'm looking for? Fucking stupid.
Yeah, not helpful. Yeah, I had my own experience with a man being very belligerent and verbally abusive to me. And I called HR and I told her what I said in response to him. And she said, well, did he stop? And I was like, yeah, but that doesn't mean that he's not going to come back. And he's continuously acted this way since I started working. And she was like, oh, well, you sound like you handled the problem on your own. Good job. And like hung up.
And I was just like, and it was a huge corporation that I was working for and very low level position working in catering. And so I was like, oh, you don't give a fuck. And I was talking to a woman. It's like, oh, your job is to just make sure the company doesn't lose any money. It's not human resources. It's, you know, it's bullshit.
So I'm so happy that you brought that up because I think that people that are not straight men don't think that they are capable of misogyny, that they can, you know, express it, walk in it boldly and uphold patriarchal ideals, such as what happened with this woman. And so I think that moms need to, you know,
understand their rights, right? And I know that you have spoken about every state has different employee rights. So your maternity rights, very depending on where you live and work, which is like crazy. So like the rights in Utah aren't the same as in Mississippi. It's like, what? So you talk about how policies are different from rights. Can you explain that to me? Yeah, thank you. So a policy is something that a company
The size is a company guideline. So for example, the work day has to start at 9am. That can be a company guideline, a company policy. Or all employees get one week off per year of PTO. That is a company policy.
Or even we're doing a limited PTO that can be a policy, but a right is something like, if a mother needs time off for prenatal care, she's allowed to take that time off, even if it's after 9am. So when they're the one what we then sees.
managers get confused about policy and the law. So they're like, well, you can be late because we have a policy that you have to be here at 9am. And the mother's like, well, I have a doctor's appointment. And then the company would say, well, you're in violation of policy, which can lead to termination. But the company does actually have to waive policy when there's a legal issue, when someone has a right. So same when a mother asked her time off her birth for healing and recovery and bonding. And the company's like, while we have a
PTO max right like you're going to hit your PTO max and she's like no but I have these rights. Like I actually can take more time off than what your policy says. So there's going to be a lot of conflicts between what the law demands and what the company decides is our internal policy.
So most of the issues I see is when the company managers get confused and they don't want to give someone what they would call preferential treatment, even though the law does actually require managers to give mothers preferential treatment because they're in a period of life where they do have more rights.
than people who are not in that experience. And it's just, isn't that common sense? She's having a baby. Why does that have to be here? This is why our public schools, oh Lord, we have failed. No child left behind. All the children have been left behind. They all behind. Goddamn it.
I wish I didn't have to do this job. There's so many things I'd rather do. Jet skiing, I would like to be in a drum circle. Maybe it's working. Maybe it's working on a jet ski. I mean, there's still a drum circle.
But instead she has to be like, hello, Mr. Peter from N sort billionaire corporation. The woman who was pregnant actually needs to go pee. So she needs to get extra time to go on her bathroom break. So like, well, we need her on the assembly line. Just let her pee in a bottle. It's like, no, bitch. It's genie in a bottle, not pee in a bottle. The hell is wrong with you? Yeah. Oh my God, Daphne. God bless you in your patience. Actually, I had a similar case like that where a woman was on the assembly line. Oh my God.
Yeah. Okay, email. Here's what the thing is with these assembly line jobs is that they work. So there's like this computer program. And when they leave their station, it starts discounting their time and their money. So when this woman had a more PBX, she needed more P breaks from pregnancy. And then later she needed to pump. And she was losing a lot of time and money because the computer at her assembly line, like the desk,
would detect she's not there, and she would actually be punished for having human functions. So yeah, absolutely. My job is to sit grown as men down and explain that we are human beings, basically. And it's a very busy job. I'm very busy. Oh my God, because patriarchy never sleeps. Patriarchy never sleeps, Daphne. What? Aren't you the only firm that does this in our country?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, listen, you got 50 cents.
Hi, I'm Emily Deschanel, and I'm Carly Gallo, and we're here to bring you... Boneheads! The official Bones Rewatch Podcast. 16 years ago, we met on the set of the TV show Bones and have been friends ever since. I played Dr. Temperance Brennan, and I played Daisy Wick. We're starting from the top and working our way through all 246 episodes. This show allows us a very long, very long...
Tune in every Wednesday to laugh with us, to cry with us, to cringe with us, and hear all our juicy behind the scenes stories. Boneheads from Lemonade Media is out now, wherever you get your podcasts.
Are you ready to dive into the ultimate pop culture showdown? Join me for Pop Culture Debate Club. I'm your host, Ronald Young Jr. Each week, our panel of trendsetters, critics, and fan favorites clash over the latest in movies, music, TV, and more. Who's right and who's just plain wrong? That's for me to decide. Check out Pop Culture Debate Club every Thursday wherever you get your BBC podcasts, produced by Luminata and the BBC.
Stephanie it's crazy to me because it's like at what point do you start the process like with your employer you know like trying to advocate for yourself at work like is there a risk of waiting to do that? Yes and when some mothers often wait when they're pregnant to announce their pregnancy and they're they also way to start planning their leave and that really
is not a good idea, because you're going to have to tell them anyway at one point and the longer you wait actually the more of the chance of a chance that they're going to be resentful. Because it is they do have to do some planning right they have to shuffle some projects around they maybe have to bring in someone new and if you're telling them like.
With only like a few weeks left of your pregnancy and you're hiding your pregnancy. They're usually going to be a little bit frustrated about that. In addition, you're going to be losing out on all of these benefits and protections that you have. And your job is only protected when the company knows you're pregnant. And if you're like trying to push through your
first trimester exhaustion and falling asleep on your job and they don't know you're pregnant you can still get fired so this is what the moms do they're like oh i'm scared to get fired if i tell them they're pregnant but i mean your job is always at risk at least if you get fired then they know you're pregnant you can sue them
You know, so I always tell mothers to announce their pregnancies right after they peed on the stick. Okay. Now, what, is there something that is possibly being worked on? Because I don't know the laws that are being presented to have, because now when you talked about the woman who unfortunately had the miscarriage, is there something for like miscarriage maternity leave? Or is it just sick time or like PTO? Because that's like a specific,
It's a different type of time off that you need, you know?
topic. Well to me because I'm a nerd. But maternity leave as a concept doesn't actually exist in the law. So we use either medical leave for recovery of the body or we use bonding leave to take care of a newborn. So when there is a miscarriage or a loss, we would use medical leave as well. So there we don't call it miscarriage leave and we actually don't even call it maternity leave. That's more of like a colloquial term we're using the workplace setting.
But legally we call it. Oh, we can't even say it. We can't even say it, Daphne. We don't even say maternity. No, it's medical. Right. The more that we speak about our body in like medical terms, the more digestible it is to the Lords of Capitalism. So like what can employers like ask you or not ask you when you when you're pregnant? If they see me being pregnant, they're like,
Oh, ex, you know, who's the dad, you know, boy or girl, you know, or like, you know, where you registered, right? Or is this like, what can they ask or not ask? They can ask anything related to your time off needs. So that's about it. Or they can ask anything related to any accommodations you need. So if you're saying, I need to work from home because I have back pain or pelvic pain that they can ask, they can ask questions like, how often is the pain?
How is it manifesting for you? But they can't ask you like outright, you know, like things about your private life. And they also can't ask you like, oh, pregnancy hormones or, you know, it looks like you have some postpartum anxiety or depression going on. Like they can't weaponize your pregnancy against you. But they can only ask questions in the context of any needs that you have asserted. Okay.
Okay, okay, that's good to know. So all the moms and moms to be out there, that's something that you should absolutely know. So I wanna get into kind of like the muddy waters of like paid maternity leave in the US, right? You have to whisper it because you can't say it, right? You can't say it. It's like, oh my God, it's like testing. It's like, oh my God, it's whisper it, right? They've all forgotten where they came from. All of them came out of China.
They all came out of a dinner. Everyone is made initially from period blood. That's where we all started. Oh, God. I am very excited. This interview has been amazing, but I'm just so angry.
Okay, so I would like to talk about, because you know, post pandem, people have been working at home, it gets very muddy, you know, when it comes to, you know, moms and maternity leave. So what if you live in a certain state, but you work remotely, right? Like what about the women working at small businesses, and they don't have a BS department, or should I say HR department? What about...
Well, that's really, really enjoying this so much. So it's really validating. Because I spend so much time with people that don't get this, right? So it's really nice when I spend time with someone who really gets it.
Oh my God. Yes. Yeah. I'm here with you eye to eye. But yeah. So what about what about the moms and moms to be who are listening who like work remote? Yeah. How does that work? So so when you work remotely, you apply the laws of the state where you live. So if your company is in New York, but you live in Colorado, then you're going to be applying Colorado's laws. So that's just kind of what it is. Okay. The good thing with remote work is that, you know, we have
Of course, more flexibility. And so this is one of the great things that came out of pandemic. One of the bad things is that the women were forced to leave their job at a rate four times higher than men. They were just continuously getting pushed out of jobs. But I do see that there is a lot more.
flexibility. There's a lot more in between like, okay, you're not a stay at home mom or you're like, you never see your children ever again. Like, there's a lot more in the in between. Though there are a lot more companies bringing their employees back to work because they
they want that control and they can trust people. And so yeah, but you're going to be using the laws of the state where you live is the answer. OK, great. I love that. It makes it simple. So we can just now now, Daphne, if I Google what the laws are within my state, are they actually going to come up? You know, I don't even trust Google. I don't know what's going on. No, they're not. And that's right.
Does Daphne have her own server? Where's Daphne's Wi-Fi? This is going to be again where I saw a problem and I created a solution because I have a whole program where I teach you exactly what your rights are in your state and what your options are and how to ask for things and where to apply for your benefits. And I also answered questions.
in this program, it's called the Liberated Mother Society. So because when you're going to Google your rights, you're not going to actually get a complete picture of it. Like you might get some government information, but the government is not your ally. They're not going to teach you how to maximize your time off or your money. So when you're going to be trying to find your answers on the government website, it's like, OK, we're trying to find answers
written by the people that are oppressing you. So it doesn't really even make sense to use those as a resource. Like you need to actually find the allies. There's a few really great non-profits as well, ABB's One Center for a Clay Flaw, are a couple that I really respect and admire. And they do also some free, they provide a lot of free resources. And I also provide a ton of free resources. And if you do need like personalized guidance, like you can come find me inside of my program as well.
I love that. Okay, we're coming close to the end and I'm very upset because I could talk to you for 15, 11 hours and also commiserate and also co-conspire with you on how to advocate for women and mothers because I don't see motherhood for myself. I say this all the time on the pot, but I know my position within the community. I have mothered people, but I
I just know that my job is to support and uphold and uplift. So women, yeah, women like you that are doing such amazing work. Thank you. I just want to support. And I know a form of a way that we can support is supporting your projects, which a little birdie tell me you're writing a book, right? Yeah. Oh my God.
Hello, in the midst of all this, starting a firm. She has her own Wi-Fi. She has her new laundry. She has her babies. You know, she has her new velvet suit and still has the time to write a book. So, Daphne, what can you tell us about it? What can you tell us about the book? So, so the book is an encapsulation of all of my secrets. In fact, this is the name. It's called Moms in Labor and Employment Lawyers Secrets to Protect Your Baby and Your Career that HR doesn't want you to know.
First of all, mom's in labor. Fucking iconic. And here's my pitch. Here's my pitch. Here's my pitch. And this is for free. Daphne is for free. But if you had like mom's in labor for real and the acronym is milk, right?
Right? Maybe that'll be for the power of the meter. Oh, and then the cover, the cover picture should be meets working on a jet ski in a velvet suit. Add a drum circle. Don't forget that part. Yeah. Add a drum circle. Yes. Okay. So we got the title icon. Oh, mom's in life. That is beautiful. Okay. So what can you tell us about it? Just give us a little sneak peek because people got to buy it. So it is both like a very tangible how to like telling you exactly what to say, what your rights are, how to
navigate all of these tricky situations. And it's also a liberation journey. So it's just encouraging mothers and reminding them that they are the sovereign, powerful queens, divine, uh, incarnations of the great mother herself embodied and to show up with that kind of respect for yourself when you're going to ask for time off to be with your baby. Like we are continuing the human race. So you can either respect me or get out of my way.
Yes, or choke. Fuck you. I'm sorry. Definitely. Okay. So where should people be purchasing it? Should it be from your side? We want to send people directly to you. Yeah. So the mom attorney is my Instagram account. Some find me for my, so I teach a lot about these maternal rights. And I also just rage a lot about all these systems. And there's just
a lot of just kind of rebellion and revolution just in a more general sense. And I'm also, I talk about paganism because I'm a forest witch. So I just, it's pretty, there's a lot going on. So I hope you come find me there. And I will be promoting the book there. And you can also get on my newsletter, which you can find on themamaturney.com. And then you'll get the announcements.
Daphne, it was truly a pleasure. I hope that you take a moment, take a second, take a breather as an amazing woman first, right? Because your whole identity is not wrapped up in your work and you being a mother, but also to pause and just realize the amazing work that you've done, the lives that you've changed, the revolutionary work that you're doing for women and moms, like
Um, I don't think there it can be quantified. I don't think there's a dollar amount that we could put on it, but I know you do per hour and you better fucking do it. Um, and, uh, I just thank you. I just thank you. This was wonderful and insightful. And I just feel so full leaving this conversation. So I just want to tell you, thank you, Daphne. And I will be buying that book. I will be buying it. So, and just to be clear, I'm a contingency feeler. So my client's own pay me, the mom's own pay me. I take money from it.
Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I would never charge a mom. Oh my God. We just got fired. Definitely start the church. That's how we're ending it. Start the church. Start it. You're leading it. We're going. I'm on the usher board. I'm your assistant. I'm here. I'm ready to go. This is it. Listen. Start the church. Just get it going. We're Mills. What's up? Here he is. Yes. Thank you so much, Deb. We have a great rest of your day. Thank you. Bye. Bye-bye.
You know, if I ever wanted to become a parent, I for show have Daphne on speed dial. I mean, who else is looking out for working moms and their rights?
definitely not your employer. And some of y'all might be saying, you know, well, it's too early to be thinking about maternity leave and stuff, my, my, my, but I saw you be on that stick last night and you ain't full of nobody. Okay. You heard death. The longer you wait to tell your boss you're pregnant, the harder it can be to protect yourself down the line. So if you are with child or thinking about having a baby, do yourself a favor. Start familiarizing yourself with your state's laws now.
Okay? But really, to all my mom was out there, it's time to recognize your power at work and advocate for more financial and time freedom. Because if Daphne taught us anything, it's that you can cherish your personal life without compromising a paycheck.
The dough is a limonata original. I'm your host, Ex Maio. This series was created in partnership with Flourish Ventures. This series is presented by the Margaret Casey Foundation. Our producers are Tiffany Bowie and Donnie Mathias. Kristen LaPour is our senior producer. Mixed in sound design by Bobby Woody.
Original music by Pat Mercedes Miller Jackie Dan Ziger is our Vice President of Narrative Content. Executive producers include me, ex Mayo, Stephanie Woodles-Wax, and Jessica Cordova-Cramer. Help others find our show by leaving us a rating and writing a review. You can follow me on IG at $80 in a suitcase and liminata at liminata media across all social platforms.
Follow the door wherever you get your podcast or listen ad-free on Amazon music with your prime membership. Thanks so much for listening. See you next week. Bye.
Hi everyone, Gloria Riviera here, and we are back for another season of No One Is Coming to Save Us, a podcast about America's childcare crisis. This season, we're delving deep into five critical issues facing our country through the lens of childcare, poverty, mental health, housing, climate change, and the public school system. By exploring these connections, we aim to highlight that childcare is not an isolated issue, but one that influences all facets of American life.
Season 4 of No One Is Coming To Save Us is out now wherever you get your podcasts. Are you looking for ways to make your everyday life happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative? I'm Gretchen Rubin, the number one best-selling author of The Happiness Project, bringing you fresh insights and practical solutions in the Happier With Gretchen Rubin Podcast. My co-host and happiness guinea pig is my sister Elizabeth Kraft.
That's me, Elizabeth Kraft, a TV writer and producer in Hollywood. Join us as we explore ideas and hacks about cultivating happiness and good habits. Check out Happier with Gretchen Rubin from Lemonade Media.
