Managing Disappointment And Loss As An Entrepreneur

I am Donnie Wiggins. This is a social proof podcast. That's David. At the time of this recording, it's the morning after. The morning after. It is the morning after the presidential election.

You think America needs a plan B, like to undo it, we did last. America needs a plan B. I knew what you did last night. America needs a plan B. First of all, we need a temperature check real quick. For those of you guys who are on with us live in real time, how are we feeling? How are we feeling? How are we feeling? Are we good? Are we sad? Like, let's drop a one if we're sad. Drop a one if we're sad. Drop a two if your candidate is in there, your candidate one.

Drop a three. Drop a three if, you know what I mean? I'll be honest, I woke up a little, people are saying stressed, people are saying optimistic. Someone says, I am not okay, disappointed, disappointed, disappointed, disappointed. Disappointed is the energy that I woke up on. In fact,

I had to spend a little bit more time in my morning routine this morning. And I had to take a little bit more time to pray and a little bit more time to meditate, to kind of re-center, you know what I mean? Because I didn't stay up watching the race play by play last night, so I woke up to it.

I woke up to it and typically what has happened in recent elections or more recent elections is you'll wake up and they'll say, oh, we're still counting votes, right? You won't know for a couple of days. It's never like this clear this fast. Yeah. They have to do some votes are being counted by hand or they, you know, something is happening, right?

And so there are ideas and people speculating, but you usually wait a couple of days. Even President Obama yesterday made a post that said, y'all chill. We won't know until maybe Thursday. It'll be a couple of days. It takes a while. And so I woke up, I saw the news, and

It was disappointing. Like I'm not angry. I don't feel that way, but I really am disappointed. It's like, all I could do is like deep sigh. And so either way, either way we have work to do, no matter who won, right? We got work to do. But if you're candidate one,

I'm happy that you're happy today, right? But I'm not happy that you're candidate one for clarity. I'm happy that you feel good today. But for those of us who wanted Kamala Harris to win, my heart goes out to you. I know it's hard. I know it's tough. I know it's disappointing. Some of you are angry. I saw Pinky on Instagram this morning. She was in tears. I see other people, you know, they're really taking this hard, right? Because it's not about.

Kamala or Trump necessarily is more about like we we thought we had it We thought we were moving in a in a different direction in the whole Campaign kind of messaging has been go forward with Kamala or backwards with Trump, right? And we'll see so even with all of the disappointment like I I take this

as disappointment and I think the room kind of feels that way just generally. Even with the disappointment, we have to move forward and we have to learn how to manage our disappointment and I think the message that we need to, we're still in our my first million, my first million dollar series.

on the social proof podcast, and David and I were sitting here thinking about we had a planned conversation that just didn't feel right today, right? And so today we want to marry what's happening in real time with things that will also continue to happen in your business, no matter who's president. So before we get started, did you want to say something?

Yeah, so this morning, I actually was talking to the morning meetup community, and I was letting them know that today, so I, and I don't know, I didn't tell anybody who I voted for, people assume I voted for Trump, or somebody called me was like, yo, we make this post, we're kind of gonna give you some money. And I was like, I don't, either way, I don't share it like that, right?

no matter what happened, life goes on.

Okay, like I don't want people to obviously embrace the moment and I think even for black women, it was just an important thing to know that like I think growing up, you have this idea, this far-fetched idea that a black woman is gonna be president one day. When you're a little girl, right? And you like, there are some people that are innovative like, yo, we need to draw out that a black woman could be a president. This little girl, she could be a president one day.

And you're that close to it. So I think that could be a part of the disappointment, like, I need one of my own to be it. You know what I mean? That just says something about black women, period. I think when Obama became president, black people in general, because it hasn't happened before.

We was like, yo, a plan can be present. The opportunities open up. So I'm, I'm insensitive to people's disappointments and I'm sensitive to, um, you know, how people feel right now. I get it. Um, but what happened happened and all we can do is move forward. So what I, I was actually looking up this morning, um,

the potential effect of Donald Trump for entrepreneurs because I'm an entrepreneur. So I'm trying to think of, okay, what are the benefits of this as it pertains to me? It might be easier getting a small business loan because he's like super pro taking the difficulty out of small businesses making money. But on the other hand,

He's real big on deregulation of certain industries, which could be challenging for people that have been doing something a certain way. And it could affect small businesses in a negative way, because once you deregulate something, there's not that many rules around it, meaning I can charge what I want. It might be hard to find the VA's or whatever. There's going to be issues, no matter who's in office. But I hope that everybody can start to move forward and we just manage what we have.

Last night I was prepared to manage, I was going to do the same Google search or chat GBT or whatever, no matter who was elected, because there's going to be good bad ups downs of it all. And I am a strong believer that God knows the end from the beginning. And I believe that everything that happens is orchestrated for our good, the things that we don't see as good right now, or we don't see as bad right now.

However we look at the situations that we're in, I think it all works together for our good and we just got to move forward. So let's go. Now it's time to find out. Let's get it. So now we got in. I did the same thing. So after I initially woke up, saw the news and I was sad, I started to say, okay, this is it. This is the decision. So.

Though I don't like who's in charge or who will be in charge, how do I thrive in this space, right? And so today's topic is managing disappointment and loss as an entrepreneur because you have to be able to do both.

David and I both had a situation recently that we'll talk about in a later episode, but it also brings me to that. As an entrepreneur, especially on your way to becoming a multiple six figure revenue generator, in this case, we're talking to those of you who desire to be millionaires, and specifically those of you who desire to make that happen sooner rather than later.

on that journey, like I think sometimes social media may paint the picture that people, there are certain people, certain elites that are experiencing when, after when, after when, and there are certain categories of entrepreneurs who fit into the box of not sharing their disappointments, right, not sharing their losses.

I was having a conversation with someone the other day who was sharing something with me that's going on in their lives. And they typically share so many personal things about them, all of the wins and all of the losses, but this particular loss is so big that they said, I can't share this one because if I share this particular loss, I'll lose my authority.

amongst my community, right? And I thought to myself, like, wow, we have to really talk to people about, and this particular loss could take this person out of business. We really have to highlight not just your wins in business, not just your systems and your processes and workflows and things like that, but how do you manage the inevitable disappointment and loss? Well, we're gonna help you with that. Do you wanna go with number one?

Yeah, I'll go with number one. So number one is embrace disappointment as a growth opportunity. David and I both just said it, right? I woke up feeling disappointed. And once I moved through my personality type is to

Take pain on my chest, like just take it and then immediately start to move forward. Once I identify how I feel, now I have to find the opportunity on the other side of it. So something happens to you in your business. You take a loss, you make a bad investment.

You don't hit your sales goal for the month or the quarter or even the year. We have to now start sitting down and figuring out because these losses are often unplanned. You don't necessarily prepare for the loss, right? So it catches you off guard. The first things first is.

Identify how you feel about it. How do you feel about it? Acknowledge how you feel about it. Say it out loud, cry, scream, you know, journal it out, whatever it is that you do. And then immediately say, okay, how can I take anything from this and use, use it to my benefit? How can I recalibrate the scale? So now just like my candidate not being the chosen candidate, I went from sadness to, okay, how do we make this work?

How do we thrive in this particular environment? How does this benefit not just entrepreneurs, but small businesses? You have to look at the language because the language can matter. So for you, you took a financial loss. What does that mean for you? How do you grow from it? Do you now need to get a financial team, a bookkeeper, maybe somebody that's a buffer in between you and major financial decisions? You didn't hit your goal. Okay. Let's look at why you didn't hit the goal.

Where are the metrics that you fell short in? Did you not generate enough leads? Did you not have enough sales? Did you miss too many sales opportunities? Meaning that you're a one person or two person operation and you have more leads coming in that you could then you could touch.

Maybe you need to get a sales team. All I see, we had all these leads coming in. Our funnel didn't work. This is a high ticket item. People may need to get on the phone with somebody. So now I'm disappointed. Yes, but I see clearly I need a sales team. I see clearly I need a buffer between me and making financial decisions. I see clearly that we got to improve on customer service. Any disappointment and loss that you experience is an opportunity for growth.

Well said, goodness gracious. And I think we've both grown more from the losses than the wins. Yeah, for sure. For sure. So number two would be staying focused on the long-term goal. So if your long-term goal was to accomplish something before the election, we still need to stay focused. Like I used a term this morning called, don't join the circus. Yeah.

because it's so easy to be distracted, like from where you're going, because there's distractions that come on assignment to distract you from where you're going. You have to stay focused on the long-term goal. I thought this was so important, man. I was at Myron's event last year, this year, and it was a guy speaking on stage. I forgot his name, but it was so impactful. He said, typically people look at

life in this way. The past dictates the future, meaning what happened in the past determines where you are today. And your future, your present, your past dictates your present. Your present dictates your future, meaning what you do today will take you to where you're going to be in the future. You said it doesn't really work like that. And this was the most profound thing I heard all year. He said, your future dictates your present.

Meaning, whatever your goal is, should dictate what you do right now. Say, whatever that future vision is, if you don't have a future vision, then you're just moving off of, okay, just hopefully today I do something that hopefully bear some fruit in the future. But he said, if you have a clear vision of the long-term goal, that should ultimately dictate what you do today, right now. If you wanna be a multi-millionaire, that goal should decide what you do today.

And if your goal is to make $100,000, that goal will decide what you do today. But what you do today will be drastically different between you going to a multi-million dollar company, you go to a $100,000 company. Today's activity should be driven by what you want in the future. He also said, I'll never forget this. He said, your present dictates your past.

And that took me a little while to like really grasp. How in the world does your present take your past? You know the past happened already. He said, you get to decide what happened in your past. And I just sit around for a little while and figure out, okay, where's he going with this? He said, those losses in the past, today you get to decide what they meant.

Today you get to decide that abusive father you had or that ugly stuff in the past. Today you get to decide what that means to you and how you operate today. I said, I got it. I got it. We got to stay focused on the long-term goal and the long-term goal should dictate what we do today. There's a lot of things you can do with $500. I mean, you can have a night out with your significant other. You could buy some really expensive shoes while

Really nice shoes are about double $500. You could buy a course or you can learn something for $500.

But I have something better for you to do with the $500. I want to meet with you every single morning for the rest of your life. Well, maybe not the rest of your life, but every morning, Monday through Friday, for the rest of the year. I have information and game that have allowed me to build a successful business, a successful community, and a successful life all the way around.

But I want to share that with you. But the only way we can accomplish this is not me selling you a course, not me giving you a one-on-one consultation because even with that, you'll get the information, but you'll need more. I want to meet with you every single morning. Now, would I meet with someone every morning for 500 bucks for a year?

And the answer is yes. Actually, we've been doing this thing since 2017. We have what's called the morning meetup. Every single month we have a theme, whether it's social media, whether it's motivation, whether it's strategy, whatever it is, we have a theme for the month and every morning in that month.

We have a conversation around that topic and I am giving a wealth of knowledge, not only myself, but a lot of friends, a lot of people that you see on this podcast, they join every single week. So you need a community of people that you can grow with and you need a coach. I'm your coach. The morning meetup is your community. Go to the morning meetup.com. It's $499 and I will meet you every single morning for an entire year. Give it a shot.

Number three, adaptability. In order to be able to manage your losses and your disappointments, you have to be able to adapt, like rapidly change a situation. We saw even just in this case, what we're talking about, you know, obviously this is inspired by the election, how quickly things can change, right?

weeks prior months prior people are so hopeful and just believing so big that this is the outcome that they're going for and you're so sure that it's going to happen and within a matter of hours in a 24 hour

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period, everything changes. And those same people who were so hopeful are filled with grief and disappointment, right? We have to be able to adapt its crucial pivoting in your business, rethinking your strategies. So when something isn't going your way or there is a loss,

How can we adjust the plan? Maybe the target is still the same, but our approach to getting there is just a little bit different. Maybe we thought that we were only going to build a business that was based on a large group community, but maybe you need to adapt and go back to day one where you're servicing clients one on one to build up your business builder muscles.

enough for you to be able to now go back into the thing and get back on track for what you really wanted to do, we got to be able to adapt and we have to be willing to adapt quickly, right? We've seen so many times where people are taking a very long time to make a decision and you will taking that amount of time when you're dealing with disappointment in business or with loss, it can literally put you out of business.

And so when you're thinking about what your next move is, it could look different. Don't keep trying to force a square into a circle if it's not fitting. Come back and say, maybe I just need to do a smaller circle to put into this circle. Maybe I need to take some smaller steps now, maybe not the big leaps so that I can continue on my journey. Adaptability is absolutely crucial. Absolutely. Y'all just for those that maybe just getting here, we're talking about managing disappointments and losses.

Number four, build resilience through reflection. We got to build resilience through these losses. I think

we're so risk averse, if that's the word I'm looking for. I'm so willing to try something because I tried stuff before and it didn't work and it didn't kill me. And I tried something else and it doesn't work and it doesn't kill me, tries something else, doesn't work and doesn't kill me. So through all of these things that didn't work, it's how I built resilience to be able to move forward because I know it doesn't kill me.

I don't do a whole lot of like outdoor stuff or construction. So I got soft hands, like a woman, you know what I mean? Like, my hands are really, really soft. So like, I was, I went to the gym and I was good. Hit the little, yo, what's up, Reese? What's so funny, man? I'm on the bench and the bench got these little ridges on it, you know what I mean? So I get on it and I'm like, all right, I'm ready. And I was like, oh, hold on, fam. That joy hurt.

But what happens is the more you do that, you start to build up these calluses where you don't feel it as much. Or people that work with their hands, like I can't, I can't, you ever shakes my hand, I got really rough hands. You can tell they work outside. I think just don't moisturize, but yeah. No, no, no, I'm talking about, I'm talking about man hands. I'll talk about the,

Not moisturizing will help this. Every calloused hand isn't coming from some hard work. Trust me. I probably touch more man hands than you. You done done some things with your hands. First off.

But my point is, once you're up against friction and once you're up against tough times, it doesn't always hurt as much. My first loss hurt. I'm like, oh my gosh, this business isn't working out. I thought I was going to be a multi-billionaire if I just recruited three people.

They didn't recruit, they three. I'm like, yo, what's up with y'all? I didn't recruit y'all three. So that those three could recruit three and I could get a Rambo. And it didn't work that way. And it hurt because I was so disappointed because I thought that was going to work. But it was those lessons that helped me build resilience to understand why it's not supposed to work in the beginning.

I have to go through like my emotions are more callous when it comes to successes and failures and losses because I've been through. First off, I want to look at you. You've been through way worse than what you're going through right now. You made it already.

So let's let that past resilience carry you like further into this one. That was number four. That was four. This is five. Separate your emotions from your strategy. Losses in general can feel very, very personal, right? You can't tell me that you don't personally feel a little hurt when you lose money. A little hurt when you lose customers.

just a little hurt when you lose something. It's a catch 22 because people will say there are no emotions in business. There are. There are actually emotions in business. You're happy and you're excited when you guys are doing stuff well and you're hitting goals and metrics. And you are sad, disappointed, depressed even when you are not hitting your metric. And so when we're talking specifically about

dealing with losses and disappointment, it's easy to become so emotionally drained where you fall into a depression and now you can't think straight. Now you're looking at that you're taking this one loss as the entire idea is a fail, right? I can never do anything else again. It can

maybe even cause you to want to quit. It can make you feel like, I can't get out of bed today, I can't get out of bed for a week. And what will happen is when you prioritize your emotions over your strategy, you'll start to let these emotions win. You'll start buying into your own excuses of, I just need to take 30 days and reset. The best time for you to reset your strategy is for when you are about to be on that emotional verge of breaking.

You know what? Breaking isn't going to help me. That's not what's going to serve me here. Sitting in my bed and I've been there, sitting in my bed feeling sad with myself, worrying, stressed out. It's not going to serve me. I remember in 2020, in 2020, you know, we were going through the pandemic and I had COVID really, really, really bad, right? And I prior to this a couple of times, but this first time that I'm talking about, I wasn't sure that I was

I thought I was gonna be on the news like every in some of the other cases, right? But prior to this, months prior to this is 2019 and I'm working really hard on my business. I've got it all planned out. I am going to be able to build my business and I'm launching this course because at that time I didn't have a high ticket course. I'm about to launch this course. Everything's gonna be great, right? I'm working on it. This is what I'm gonna start doing in January and then this time comes and we're working but now the world has shut down.

And then I end up with COVID, a severe case of COVID, right? And I'm laying in the bed and I'm worrying, I'm panicking. If I don't make it, what's going to happen? If I die right now, I am financially responsible for my whole family, my mom, my daughter, my dog, everybody's depending on me for their livelihood in this moment. So I eventually had to say, you know what?

If this is true, if my family is relying on me right now for survivorship, if this is true, then I have to think strategically. No, I can't get to the studio and record any videos. No, I can't hire a professional videographer to come in here during the middle. I have COVID. I can't do anything. I let strategy kick in. What can I do? I started Googling Dave, how to create

how to reduce sound like the echo effect in an open apartment because you know my condo at that time still is but in this one all windows so you got sound coming from everywhere you got the air coming from everywhere and I found this YouTube video that said if you are a creator creating from home and you want to produce high quality sound in your video line your bathtub with blankets as many blankets as possible and then put

pillows around you and sit in that bathtub and record. And so I said, I can do that. I can do that. I the first couple of days crawled myself to that bathroom. I got the blankets. I lined my tub. I closed the bathroom door. I had my computer sitting. I had a camera sitting on the on a tripod outside of the tub to catch some audio. And I also had my computer right in front of me. Well, I can't show myself sitting in this tub, though I have the documentation of it.

I can't present a course this way. I got that everything is done and I deliver and that course is what single-handedly helped me get to seven figures. I had to let strategy kick in the moment that I felt better, even though I was disappointed that I couldn't produce the course the way I wanted to. I couldn't show my face and the moment that I started to feel better

I washed my hair for the first time, curled my hair, went and sat at my office setup in my living room, turned the camera on, and said, welcome to Six Figure Accelerator. We're about to change your life. Let's go. That was the only video that they were able to get at that time. And then I went in and strategy said, why don't we do if I couldn't do videos throughout the whole course? It's a seven week program. What about at the three week mark? I drop another video showing my face. Hey, you guys, it's Donnie. I'm just checking on you right now.

And people commented on how effective the course was without being able to see me and how nice of a surprise it was for me to insert these videos, checking on them. They thought it was planned when really I adapted and I adjusted and I let strategy take over and win over the emotion of being so disappointed and so scared and so uncertain and so sure, unsure. Man, one of my favorite quotes is, then I think I came up with it. Emotions, cloud, good judgment.

Emotions, cloud, good judgment. Sometimes you have to use your emotions and you have to be intuitive, but for the most part, in business, in business. And me and Dany, we were just talking about that yesterday. We don't need to go all into it, but emotions will cause you to do and say things that one, you'll regret later. And two, it just wasn't the best for your business. Emotions, cloud, good judgment. Okay. Next, what is this? Six? Yeah.

Lean on your community. That's good. You're taking losses. You're facing disappointment. Lean on your community because I promise you, you can draw strength from them. You are not going to draw strength by curling up in your bed by yourself. You have to lean on your community.

When I lost my father, I started to lean on the community and I found other people who were in a similar situation and they went through it or they were currently going through it. And I found people like more importantly to people that were currently going through it after I went through it.

I'm leaning on my community and I'm able to share with them, you know, how to get over it. And I'm inspiring them and motivating them to just keep going, even though I'm not in a position where I feel like keep going, but me encouraging somebody else help me get through it. I'm leaning on my community or I'm talking to somebody who's been through it. Then they're sharing with me, my cousin, he gave me this bit of advice when I went to my dad, before I went to my dad's funeral, he said, when you go, he said, alone,

you can, you said, I want you to feel the way that you feel, embrace it. But when you get around your family, I want you to be the strength. I want you to be yourself. I want you to be your upbeat self. I want you to share and I want you to like make people laugh the way you make people laugh. And I want your love on people. And I want, I want, I want you to be the light that you bring to a room. And I really, really wanted to sit in my own little bubble, but

Like doing that, not only encouraged some of my family members, but it encouraged me to. And he said, when you get back from the funeral, I want you to go right back to work. I want you to go straight back to work at the cheesecake factory. Don't take a whole lot of time off.

And at first I'm thinking, this is very insensitive. I need time to sit, but I went straight back to work and that was, I needed, me, and this is just me, this is just me. I needed to be around people because I'm a natural encourager and me encouraging other people encourages myself. And then you meet these other people that like, well, I didn't want the pity party of the, hey, man, you okay? Everything all right. I started to love that.

But leaning on my community got me through so many issues, especially in business, man. When you just have some people, you have a Donnie that you can bounce things off of, and we both going through some stuff, and we go to lunch. I talk about my problems, she talk about her problems, and we both leave happier. Yes, that's a fact. That is a fact. Get you a Donnie and get you a date. 100%. What number was that? Number six, number seven. Focus on what you could control.

Focus on what you can control a lot of times when you're going through something and you are especially when it produces disappointment or a loss for you. You start looking at all of the what ifs. If I had done this, if I had done that and if I just had this and if I just had that,

When usually we can solve problems by saying, OK, what are the key players here in this situation? What are the key players? All right. So we're failing because 100 people went on to Google and they left negative reviews. So now we've got these negative reviews on Google. We've got bat shipping. We've got bat fulfillment, bat processes. People are getting their packages late. Well, here's what we can do. We can control focusing on customer relations.

I know something about customer service. Here's what I can do. I can pick up the phone. I'm the CEO. I shouldn't have to do this, but I'm going to do this. I can pick up the phone and call every single customer that has documented an issue.

I can be proactive in looking the system and see every single delayed order that's still waiting to ship out and I can personally call. Hi, my name is Donnie Wiggins. Thank you so much for doing business with us. I understand that you're still waiting on your order. I understand that you've had some issues with, you know, some customer service issues with the brand. I wanted to reach out to you personally. This is not something that I would normally do, but this is just an expression of how important it is for me to solve your problem. Then you're going to start seeing reviews that say,

I know I did business with them and I didn't get my package on time and I had originally wrote a terrible review, but my God, Donnie just called me herself. David just called me himself. You just called your customer yourself and said, it is my priority to solve your problem. Things you can control. Maybe you've got some disappointment and loss because you don't have enough hands on deck. Well,

You probably or may be in a situation where you feel like I have team in place. I don't need to do certain things. You can control jumping in. You can control picking up the phone and reaching out for help. What cousin, what niece, what nephew, what brother, what uncle, what aunt, meets to come in here and help me get these orders out of the door.

Who needs to do it? I see Canvas Beauty, Stormy Steel, I think Steel is her last name. Is it Steel? Stormy Steel, I'm such a fan of hers, just seeing how she has built this business and she has adjusted and adapted year after year after year. She started with her canvas beauty oil

for growth, hair growth, right? You put the oil on your scalp and there's hair growth and you had mixed reviews. You had a whole bunch of people saying it worked. Look at this. And then you had a whole bunch of people that said I didn't experience anything and she keeps going and she keeps going and I don't know what made her get into body care, right? But suddenly after not really seeing a lot of her, she comes back with this body care line and the body care line is going crazy all over the internet to the point.

where when she released this and went live on TikTok, she made a million dollars in that day, instantly became TikTok's biggest live seller on their platform. And they started molding the live sale strategy method for creators after her process. And now she's getting flown out over and over and over and over again, but what I remember was the first time she did it.

They weren't expecting to make a million dollars in a day. They weren't expecting to sell more products in a day than they ever had before. She got to work and with TikTok, you have to ship your products out, I believe within like two days. They have to go out within two days.

Who's about to get all these products out this door in two days? Because if you don't, it's like, if I don't, they will cut my TikTok shop off. They will ban you for a while. And if that's your main source of income, you can be thinking about all the things. Well, I can't control that outcome. I can't be in control of whether or not we don't get all the orders out of the door, but I can control the effort.

I saw Stormi bringing her husband, bringing her friends, bringing her team, bringing anybody who was available y'all. Here's the process. Let's run this down real quick. Here's how whatever happens and da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. And they got those orders out. And then you see a couple of weeks later, there was a woman who received

something wrong in her order. Something was wrong with her order. Well, things are going to go wrong when you're having to adjust and adapt that way that quickly, right? And so Stormy comes back exactly with what I'm saying, focus on what you can control. And while she's in her warehouse and these products are being packaged, she's in the middle of fulfilling

her next big order. She stops for that one customer and she says, Hey, um, David Shans, I've been meaning to come back to this. I see you had an order, an issue with your previous order. Hey, I'm stormy. Watch me package all of these bonuses for you right now. And she gave her nearly one of every single product that she had. Do you know what that did to the morale of her potential customers?

Do you know what it did to the morale of her team? Do you know what it did to the morale of that particular customer who's issue she solved? Focusing on what she could control, got her business back in line. It showed that the clients and the customers, the customers can trust her and it turned that customer most likely into a super fan because wow, what you were able to control blew my mind. Beautiful. Focus on what you can control. Well said. Well said. All right, we got a couple more real quick. Number eight.

Number eight, transform that loss into fuel. Those else should be fuel. Man, listen, and I'm not saying that you gotta try to show somebody up or things of that nature, but I'm telling you, you did not come this far just to come this far. That should be fuel to show you. We have to keep going. Don't give up right now. This is, I don't have any like,

a one, two, three formula for you for this particular point. But we got to start bottling that stuff up and using it to propel. So all of my losses, my first book actually, dreams are built overnight.

I just put in all of my experiences, all of my losses and put it into a book and I started selling my book for $30 at a time, meaning I'm selling my problems for $30 a piece. We package all that stuff up and that was the fuel. It's all the losses that fuels what we do today. We built our whole business around allowing people to see all the lessons that you could learn from the lessons that I learned so you don't have to go through them off. So use whatever those Ls are, whatever those disappointments are as fuel to get to the next level.

Yeah. Um, and then also when we're talking about number number nine, um, number nine, I'll say regularly regularly review regularly review. I want you to regularly review. You'll become better and better and better at managing losses and managing a disappointment.

When you had, let's take your most recent loss. Let's say you're in the middle of a loss or a major disappointment right now. I want you to spend the next couple of days actually documenting how you're responding. How do I respond to this loss? Did I get angry? Did I scream at someone? Did I fire someone? Did I send someone a text message that should have been a phone conversation?

What did I do? What could I have changed? And then I want you to look at exactly that. What could I have done better? In this situation, did I make this loss or this disappointment worse by acting emotionally? Write down what you can do better, right? And so this is going to become your like self-management as a CEO journal, so to speak.

So the next time and there will be a next time that you have a loss or you're experiencing some disappointment. I want you to go back to the journal before you act. Let me see. Hold on real quick. What did I do this time? Who was I in this moment? How did it serve me or not serve me? What did I say? What did I say I could do better? What did I say I could do to recover from this faster, stronger, better the last time and I want you to.

implement that in this current disappointment and then there's going to be another disappointment and you'll go back to that second journal entry now you'll apply it to the third disappointment and then there's going to be a fourth disappointment and you'll go to the third journal entry and you'll reply you'll apply those notes and the things that you noticed about yourself to the fourth one and you'll continue to do this until you're becoming better and better and stronger and stronger and suddenly now you're able to lead better now you're really on track to making millions because

You don't shut down. You're able to manage your team. You're able to be an example. You're able to manage your business. You're able to stay in there longer because here's what happens. What people don't understand is when we're managing, when we fail to have emotional control, it's an example of how to behave to our entire team.

It's a direct example of how to behave. If they see that you go off the deep end, well, then when they're working for you and they're having their own disappointment, they'll go off the deep end. If they see that because you've gone through a loss or disappointment, you start talking to your team badly. They're going to start talking to your team badly. They'll see that when a customer charges back on you and you're

behind the scenes, curse in the mouth, and another thing. And here's more evidence and da, da, da, da, da, da, da. And you're getting the result because you didn't do and you didn't, when they see you doing that, guess what? Guess what your customer service team is going to do. They're going to be very quick to respond in the same tone. Why? Because you're doing it.

So it's very important to document along the way how you respond or at least take note of how you respond. How do I respond? How do I handle it? How could I have responded and been better? Because people are watching. Just like at home, your kids are watching and you see them becoming many versions of you or many versions of your significant other, the other parent.

your team are going to become many versions of you too. And they'll either become many versions of the best of you or many versions of the worst of you. Absolutely. Lastly, you know, if you're just joining, we are talking about how do we manage disappointments and losses. And I think this has been the most important in my life. It's to celebrate the small wins.

And I think that even kind of doubles into your gratefulness. So somebody asked me actually two weeks ago, they say, y'all, how do you keep going after the struggles in business and the ups and downs and things of that nature? And I was like, dang, that's a good question. Because I didn't have an immediate answer. And I just had to think through it. How do I manage that? And the answer I came up with is, I got kids.

When something goes wrong in business, I am grateful for the fact that I got some little ones at home that love me. Or if I take a major financial loss, I can lean into the fact that it wasn't my last dollar. Or I know I'm going to go home and be mad about it, but I have a roof over my head. And I think it's a slap in the face

to whoever you believe provides you with whatever you have in your life right now, that if you are upset about one area of your life going wrong, when all this other stuff is fine, my daughter, she's so disrespectful.

Because some will have a toy, and she only wants the toy because he has it. It's not that she wants the toy, but he has the toy he's playing. She's like, oh my gosh, his mind. He wasn't even thinking about it, baby, first off. But we have a whole playroom.

with mad toys that at the time when you wanted the toy to sit in the corner of that playroom, you say, Daddy, can I have it? Daddy, Daddy, can I have it? Can I have it? Can I have it? Can I? I'm like, oh my gosh, it's the most important thing in your life right now. Let's get it for you. But we fill the house with these toys that my baby has, but as soon as she can't have one of them,

She's ungrateful for everything else. And I look at, I have a spiritual connection. I am in that space where I truly, truly believe that everything that I have guys decided to give it to me. Cause there's some things that I can't explain. I can't explain how I meet a woman on Tinder and we get married six months later and she gives me three kids and we're happy and we got a house. I can't explain it. I don't think I did anything special to do that.

or for some of the opportunities and businesses that I've been able to build. So even when I have a rough season and we all have these rough seasons in business, when I have these rough seasons, I can lean on the fact that I've won in so many different areas.

Look at all the things I've been able to accomplish. I lost today, but yesterday and the week before that was up, I can handle this one. I celebrate every small win. I want everyone to create in that lease list that you can lean off of in the at least list. I like that. I lost this, but at least I got as serious as when I lost my mom. I lost my mom, but at least I have this new baby.

that I can love and lean into. God decided to take my mom, but not too long before this, you gave me the most precious thing that I ever experienced in my life. So that kept me going. So we need to create this at least because y'all got some stuff. You are blessed, beyond measure, but if you never ever take time to open your eyes and see all the other blessings, you'll see all the things that you don't have and that is no way to live.

Yeah, that is no way to live. You guys, if you got anything from this, drop a one in the comments, wherever you're watching this live right now, drop a one in the comments, like, we got to be on track. We, when we're talking about, and I know we're in our make your first million, make my first million series with the social proof podcast, but when we're helping people hit their goals, it can't always be about, okay,

Open the doors, get an LLC, get an EIN number. This is what you do and do a webinar. Do it. It's not about that all the time, right? Your emotions, your mindset, your state of being has a direct impact, if not the largest impact on the outcome and the results that you get in your life and also in your business.

I believe this episode is that episode where you check yourself. Check yourself. Am I managing my emotions? Well, right? Do losses sit me down for far too long? Am I staying in sunken and or sat in places longer than I need to be? Do I find myself feeling emotionally down and distraught more than normal? Is this happening over and over and over and over and over? And sometimes if it is happening over and over and over and over, you got to check your energy.

You have to check your energy and what are you putting out there to start getting some of this back. Now every, every loss isn't your fault, right? You didn't ask for every loss. Every disappointment is not your fault, but we have to manage our expectations based on the human beings that we are. And we also have to manage our expectations based on what we are willing to do for it.

Let's go. And that brings me here. Let's go. What are you willing to do for it? What are you willing to do for it? You're on your way to your very first million dollars. What are you willing to do for it? Are you willing to make your at least list or did you just hear David say that and you said, oh, that's a bar.

that you're not gonna do anything with. Did you hear me say that you need to journal how your document your behavior and what you should be doing in real time so you know what happened, what went wrong and what will work? Or did you hear me say that and say, ah, that's a good idea.

that I'm not going to do anything with. Did you know that we had my first million conference coming up? Did you know that we had that coming up? And we've extended you the opportunity to be there over and over and over again. You want to make your first million. You want to avoid as many mishaps and mistakes and losses and disappointments on that journey as possible. But have you registered? Are you there?

You love our voice right? You're here. If you made it to this point in the episode, you're here. You got something from it. We need you to be in Atlanta December 13th, December 13th for the My First Million Conference. David and I have set a co-goal for 2025 and we want to help at least 50 people make their very first million dollars

In 2025, we want to work with you. We want to show you what we did. We want you to have some access to us in 2025. But the first thing that you have to do is be in that room, Atlanta, Georgia, December 13th. But also we got something fun that's happening. It won't be all work. December 12th, we're also having a joint birthday party. And it is for a select group of you based on what ticket type you buy. And it doesn't matter. Tickets start at $100. So there's no excuse. Whoa, whoa, whoa, $100.

Yeah, you know that, don't act surprised. They can come learn the strategies in person, not a course, not a video call, but in person from us, chop it up with us for as little as a hundred bucks. See, Dave feels like he has to act shocked because you hadn't made a move yet. Maybe, you know what I mean? He's over here like he didn't help come up with the price.

But he has- He questions it every day because you hadn't made a move. You know what I think though? If I'm being totally honest, I feel like if we had made this a $2,500 conference, it would already be sold out.

Yeah. I mean, the agenda is definitely more than a $2,500 ticket value, right? Well, we're going to be teaching and laying out those frameworks are definitely more than a $2,500 ticket. But what I have learned and why I've been in the space of high ticket coaching for so long now for so many years is when people pay, they pay attention. And when they see that there's a price tag on it that's not $100, they feel like that it's more valuable.

like I'm asking y'all in the comments did we make it did we make it to an inexpensive does a hundred dollars does a hundred dollars make it feel like you're not gonna get what you need to get from the event I want to know for those of you who are like I didn't know this is my first time hearing about it if you're in our community over here on social media on Instagram drop the word million in the chat drop the word million and when you do that it will send the link directly to your DMS do that but I want to know because we're learning too yeah for sure did we make it

to cheat. Showing made it at least two grand because that makes sense. I'll invest 2000 to make a million, but in, in some people's mind, there's no way that they are really going to give the sauce for a hundred bucks. And I'm here to tell you that we are different. Yeah. We've been giving, let's, first off, if you're a follower of the social group podcast, you know, we lay it all out. We don't keep no information.

The upstairs goes best. Every strategy we got, we share it, but now it's time for you to learn. There is a curriculum. There's a blueprint for 2025 million, especially now taking this consideration. We're going to understand how to make it with this current administration.

like everything is new now everything's different now that the world is changing constantly and there's some things you need to understand if you are going to make your first million so comment in the chat if you're on instagram comment the word million if you are all you two click the link in the description and meet us in atlanta december 13th

meet us in Atlanta. And if you are a member of my community actionable CEO, where I mentor entrepreneurs every single week in the areas of personal, professional and financial growth, I got a special surprise for you inside of the community. So when this episode drops, you get an incentive.

to come to the My First Million Conference. Are we releasing that now? I'm letting them know because all I'm saying is if you are not a member of Actionable CEO, if you're on my live, if you're on my Instagram live, drop A-C-E-O because the letters A-C-E-O for a link to join because I got a surprise that I'm giving you, I feel like you're gonna do it too.

I didn't know we were doing it right now. Okay. Listen, if you are in my life and y'all see us promoting morning meetup, the gathering of entrepreneurs every single morning, we have a surprise for you. So now at the time, if you comment, MmU, I will send you a DM to join morning meetup. We have a very, very,

special. Members only. Surprise. And we decided like, yo, for our communities, we are going to really, really show some extreme love. And I know what you're thinking, like, how do you do more love than $100? How do you give more love than $100? Comment MMU or ACEO and you will find out. So we're going to announce it. We're going to announce it to the community. Okay, should we announce it to the community on Friday?

Maybe one else to the community on Friday. Yeah, let's go live on Instagram just to make sure nobody else wants to get in. Actionable CEO in morning meetup before we drop it. And don't worry if you guys purchased your ticket already. You still have an opportunity. It doesn't matter. Go ahead and get your ticket. You still will have an opportunity to join actionable CEO or morning meetup.

and take advantage of the same thing, even if you already purchased your ticket. You just, this is what community is. This is what community is, baby. So before this episode comes out, we will have already gone live. We would have already made the announcement, no matter when you see this, you get the benefit. So watch out. Oh, we will see y'all in the communities and we'll see you December 13th. Start booking your flights. Get your room right now. The link is wherever you're watching this video. Bye.

First of all, congratulations on watching this whole episode. If you like this episode, just watch, check out this one right here. I handcrafted this one for you, because you like the one you just watched. Check it out.