Mailbag: Navigating Spiritual Growth, Pride, and Overwhelm

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Hey guys, welcome to another episode of the Blessed and Balsa Podcast. I'm excited for today's episode. This is a mailbag episode where I will be answering audience questions. I do these a few times throughout the year. Usually when I record in a podcast, I'm like talking to myself and uploading it. I am communicating whatever the message that the Lord has given me. But these Q&A episodes, I feel like are opportunities for us to really talk to each other.

And for me to share my thoughts on certain things and help you with certain things. So I'm really excited. I got some really, really good questions back. I sent out an email to my list this week and the questions that I got back were really, really good. And I have a lot to say. And I believe that these questions or my answers to them will not only be impactful to the person who asked it, but also to all of you guys that are listening.

So the first question, we had a little bit of a back and forth because I wanted to get some clarity so I can make sure I'm giving her the most specific answer. So I'll read you our correspondence and then I'll answer. So she says, I have a question about navigating guilt for wanting to go deeper spiritually, but feeling as though I'm going against my upbringing of being a devout Christian from the south.

To be more specific, I recently had an enlightening encounter that reminded me of a moment that I felt closest not just to the external God, but the God that lives in me internally.

This moment was a result of me both being in my word, spending time with God, but also doing some healing work with the shaman. I stopped because I learned from another Christian woman that this was witchcraft. Fast forward to the recent enlightenment and I tussled with what does living beyond the world's idea of Christ look like for me and seeking beyond Western Christianity? Have you dealt with this before and what are your thoughts?

So I responded and said, thank you so much for your question. I have a few follow up questions for clarity. Can you clarify what you mean by recent enlightenment? Was that something separate from the shaman experience? Also, do you believe the shaman experience was witchcraft? Lastly, what is your perspective of the world's slash Western view of Christianity that makes you want to live beyond it?

I apologize for the 50 million questions. I just said that I wanted to be the most helpful. She said the recent enlightenment was at a maternal mental wellness event for Black Christian mothers and was three years post the shaman experience. I did not feel an individual conviction about the shaman and she too was a Black Christian woman and consistently referred to God.

and the gospel of resurrection, which was the primary reason I felt comfortable allowing her into my journey. In regards to the world slash Western review of Christianity, I feel this feeling that God is more than the sacrificial earthly God that just gives us things. I hope this clarifies. So with that clarity, I'm going back to her original question that says, have you ever dealt with this before? And what are your thoughts?

I have definitely dealt with wanting to go deeper in my relationship with the Lord. I was at a point where I had been in church for a few years. I was reading my word and just really building my relationship with God on my own. And I felt like I had plateaued

where I was able to go with the tools that I had. I felt like I had a pretty good understanding of the word. Of course, we'll never fully understand it, but I felt like I had a good understanding of the word. I was active in church. I was serving in different capacities. I was

just in a really comfortable place in my faith, but I was still hungry and thirsty for more. I wanted to understand more. I wanted to go deeper in my relationship and my connection with the Lord. And I felt like I said, like I had reached a plateau from all of the resources that I had. And so like many of us, when we reach that place, we start looking for resources elsewhere.

And I believe it's in this vulnerable space that the enemy does his best deception work with people who are in this predicament. And I never fully entered into any witchcraft, but there were definitely temptations there. And I thank God for the Holy Spirit. And you described it as guilt.

But I believe that what that is is conviction. I had someone who was trying to get me into their program and they were someone who at one point was very much so filled with the Holy Spirit, somebody that I saw as safe, somebody that I saw as a person who was truly Christ light and truly serving the same God as me.

But there was something about what they were doing that I could not fully get into. And I found myself just really in this tug of war, where I now know that was the Holy Spirit, like don't know, don't go there.

But my mind, I'm like, well, they are same as you, where you said that this person was a shaman, but they talked about the resurrection. They talked about the Lord, where that made you feel safe, but it's deception. And the same was happening to me in this sense.

And I remember just not having any type of peace of getting involved in this person's program at all. But again, that desire in my heart was still there to go deeper in the Lord. But because I could not have peace about it, and I'm not talking about physical peace, I'm talking about that internal regulation system that the Lord has placed on the inside of all of us, that was just going off.

And I said, you know what? I can't do this. I don't have any rationale for it. I don't have any logical reasoning. I don't have any proof necessarily that this isn't OK, but I can't do it because I don't have peace about it. And I don't feel like this is something that the Lord is OKing me to do. And it wasn't until later on that I realized that what was happening was definitely witchcraft.

And I mean, this person really was trying hard to get me into their program. They was trying hard to use my influence to validate their foolishness. They were trying very, very hard to dig their claws into what I had going on. So much so that they even had like sent me a seed. Hey, the Lord told me to send this money to you to invest. I said, no, he didn't.

I've sent that money back so fast. Absolutely not. Give it to the poor. Don't give it to me because you ain't going to have no claws. Nothing planted over here. This is pure soil. And so I was able to realize later what the Lord was protecting me from, but I didn't realize it in that moment. All I had was this conviction from the Holy Spirit to say, Hey, don't do that.

And I believe for you, again, you described it as guilt, but I would lean into it more so as conviction. Going back to this vulnerable space for a second, because again, I believe that many of us have been in this space or are going to be in this space. And I've spoken to many women over the years where same thing, I wanted to go deeper in my relationship with God, but somehow I ended up in witchcraft. Somehow I ended up in all of these spiritual places.

that are flat out demonic. So let me tell you what I did instead. And I believe that this is the answer to anybody who's in this space that will help protect you from going down the wrong path. So after I realized that this person was trying to woo me into some foolishness, I was like, God,

I desire to deeper things. I want to grow closer to you. I want a deeper understanding of you, of your word, of all of that. But I don't want that desire to be a breeding ground for the enemy to really come in and tank what you're doing at me. So I'm going to keep praying about it. I'm going to keep asking for it. And I'm just going to wait until you tell me

And you show me how to have the depth and the spiritual maturity that I'm looking to have. And you know what I realized in this season was one, the depth and the spiritual maturity that we're looking for is going to happen. And it's going to happen through suffering. It's going to happen through endurance. It's going to happen through continuing to be obedient, continuing to put ourselves under whatever pain that we may have to go through in order for the Lord to refine us that depth.

It comes from that. And to be honest, a lot of times the things that are going to take us to where we want to be with the Lord are the very things that we're running from. So that's one thing I want you to understand, that the deeper things is not in all of these wools. That's what I must say. Sorry, I don't have a more sophisticated word for you. But it's not in the witchcraft. It's not in the

shamans and the healers and the crystals and the African spirituality and all that is not in that. All of that stuff is spiritual and it is deep spiritual things because it's demonic, but it is not you growing closer to Christ. You develop death in the Lord through

abiding in Him, through dwelling in Him, through long suffering, through obeying Him, through being committed to Him, consistently surrendered to Him. That's how you develop depth in the Lord. And the second way that you do that is through His Word. If you want to go deeper with the Lord, if you want to gain a new level of depth in your understanding of Him, His Word is exactly where you need to be. There is so

much in this text so much. If you have, if you're somebody who has been studying the word, you have been spending time in it and you kind of feel like there are levels quote unquote that you haven't unlocked, now it's time to dig into the history. Now it's time to dig into the true context.

of the text. Where did this happen? Why did this happen? Who was involved? What does this mean in comparison to the rest of the text? How does this show the character of God here really diving deeper into the context, the implications, the definitions of the words, all of the things of the text? As you do that, that is also going to allow you to gain a deeper understanding of the Lord in the right way.

Study the text like a scholar. We are all smart educated women. Study the text like a scholar. Get you some concordances, some get you some type of historical materials to help you understand certain aspects of the text. Get you some directories or Bible study softwares.

That's going to truly allow you to dive deep into the scriptures. If you want to go deeper, do that. There are great Bible study softwares. I think logos is one of them. Discovery Bible is another one. Some free things online. Biblestudytools.com. Biblehook.com.

get you a good study Bible that has a concordance in the back of index. Like when I wanted to go deeper with the Lord, when I was studying my Bible, I'm reading the text. I'm reading the commentary at the bottom. I'm going to the back of the book because I'm circling words that I don't know. I'm going to the back of the book to get those definitions. And then I'm going to the different online tools to read this in the Hebrew and read this in the Greek.

to further understand what's being said. I'm reading the profiles because if you got a good study, Baba has all of this. I'm reading the profiles of the different people that are being mentioned there. I'm learning more about them to better understand certain aspects of what may be taking place in the text. I'm studying where exactly that this happened. What was the climate and the culture like at this time? All of this gives you more context.

And through context, you're able to get more clarity. And with that clarity comes more depth. And with the Holy Spirit on the inside of you comes more revelation and it comes specific revelation to your life and what he wants you to get out of it. So I wanted to provide that solution because it's not lost on me that many people are in that space and want to go deeper with the Lord.

And it's not lost on me that the enemy survives there because that vulnerability is a perfect opportunity for deception. And I don't want us to get deceived. I don't want our desire for more of the Lord to send us into more of the enemy. I want our desire for more of the Lord to send us closer to our Father.

Now, going back to the specific letter because she asked, I'm giving my thoughts, she asked for my thoughts, so I'm giving that. But some things that stood out as well is that she was saying a part of that guilt she was feeling was because she is a devote Christian from the South. And for those of you who don't know, Southern Christianity has a culture to it.

My grandmother is a Christian from South Carolina, so I understand. And she and I rarely talk about the Bible because we just don't agree on a lot of things because the Christianity that she comes from and the truth.

I remember one time she goes to a Baptist church and they were doing communion. I was a kid and they told me I couldn't take communion. They were like, have you been baptized before? I was like, no. And so they passed the little plate over me. Like you can't take communion. I said, why not? Because you haven't been baptized.

Now, I'm a child. I didn't have any facts or, you know, a deeper or any understanding of the text for me to be able to refute that. But I just knew that that didn't sound right. And I remember later, I asked her, I'm like, hey, why did they tell me that I can't

take communion because I haven't been baptized. That doesn't make sense. If communion is about remembering the Lord and what He did for us, what does Me being dipped in water have to do with that? I can't remember Him because I haven't done that. It just, it wasn't connecting and nobody could answer my question.

And so that's really the culture, I believe, of a lot of churches, especially in the South, and especially with the certain cultural aspects of denominations where they have rules and regulations and things that are simply not in the Bible. And I believe that when you've grown up in that, breaking off from that can produce a level of guilt.

especially when you're from the south because respect is really big. If you're somebody who goes against what the norm is that could be viewed as disrespectful. So I understand the cultural implications here. And so I wanted to point out that part of the guilt could be conviction earlier when I said that in order to just introduce a different perspective. But I do think you're also dealing with some guilt from that aspect. Like this is how

I've always grown up. And now I'm seeking to get closer to the Lord and what the text says he is and not the religious system. And I have some that I'm still ingrained in me that that can be rebellious or that can be disrespectful. And I'm dealing with the emotions of that. I think that that's very real. And I think that that's very, very real for a lot of people who are coming out of certain systems and going into true Christianity. And so for that, what I would say

It's surrendered to the reprogramming. As you grow closer to the Lord, He's going to have to reprogram you. He's going to have to remold you into who He saw before He formed you and your mother's womb before culture got a hold of you before these norms have been taught to you.

He's going to have to prune and refine and mold and rebuild you like only he can. So I will say just surrender to it. And a part of that process is feeling guilty. It's feeling disrespectful is dealing with all of the emotions that come with confronting things.

And I believe that it's okay. That's one of those moments where I'm like, just sit under the suffering and let it do its work. And are you being vulnerable and also be vulnerable with the Lord about it? Like, God, I'm going to do what you said, but this makes me very uncomfortable.

And I believe he will comfort you in that. And I believe he will also give you strategy on how to navigate that. Maybe when you're at Thanksgiving dinner, this is top of mind because Thanksgiving is this week. Maybe you're at Thanksgiving dinner. You ain't even talking about the Bible at all. Just so that you're not getting triggered by anything that you're trying to break away from. And I believe that in that vulnerability, the Lord will give us those strategies. He'll give us that comfort. And it also robs the enemy of the opportunity to antagonize us.

when you've already been honest about honest about how you feel and that guilt that you feel with the Lord. And maybe he gave you a strategy to say, Hey, instead of going back home for Thanksgiving, do Thanksgiving with your friends where you are now. So now instead of if you would have normally gone back home, you would have had to deal with all of the things that row up these emotions that you have because you're in a vulnerable space. Now the Lord is giving you strategy to be able to avoid a trap of the enemy. I hope that makes sense.

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Those are my thoughts. The long wind is like almost 18 minutes of answering that one question, but y'all know I like to be thorough and I want to make sure I hope the person who wrote in as well as anybody else who may be experiencing something similar. And if you have any follow up questions, feel free to email me.

The next question says, hey, Tatum, thanks for the opportunity. My question is about dealing with prideful thoughts. You've accomplished so much in your business and industry. You probably made more money than many people in your circle. You're seen as a thought leader. People show up for you and pay attention to what you have to say. Have you ever dealt with pride as you look back or take in all that you have accomplished? Is there anything that the Lord has taught you or shown you about this? How do you take hold of your mind when you're tempted to think prideful thoughts?

To answer the question of have I dealt with pride? Yes, but not necessarily in prideful thoughts of light. Oh, I'm great. I've done this. I've accomplished that. No, not in that way. I did a podcast interview a couple of days ago and we were talking about my entrepreneurial journey and she asked me the question of what does it mean to make God your CEO? And in order for me to answer that question, I had to take her to through my journey.

so that she could understand that making God your CEO was less about the slogan and what sounds good. But it is a process. It is a process of surrender. It's a process of obedience. It's a process of frustration. It's a process that encompasses so many different things in order to remain in alignment with the Lord. And as I went through this journey, I became an entrepreneur in 2015.

It's about to be 2025. So this is almost 10 years of a journey. And when I think about everything that I have accomplished, when I think about the revenue I've made, the goals that I've accomplished, the growth that I've achieved in business and all of these different things that from the outside looking in means something to other people, there's a context that I have.

that other people don't have, to where I know the suffering that I had to go through before getting to success. I know the sacrifice and the internal battles that I had to deal with in order to get to the accomplishment. So the accomplishment doesn't really mean as much as the process.

And I believe that when you live a life dedicated that way to where you're surrendered to the lessons of the Lord and not just trying and not just being intoxicated by your ambition, then pride is a lot less susceptible to creep in.

It doesn't mean it won't because we're going to get to the ways that pride has creeped in. But in this way of me, my chest being poked out or having these prideful thoughts or feeling like I did something, I don't really deal with that because I know the context that came and the struggle that came with every single thing that other people view as an accomplishment. Also by nature of the process of my journey, I can only attribute anything that I've done to the Lord.

only because I remember when he had me shut down the business that I created in order to follow him. I remember when he had me taking all of these leaps of faith and I was confused. I didn't know what my business was. I felt like I was in this space where I'm talking about the Lord on this new podcast.

didn't feel qualified to do that, didn't feel qualified to talk about entrepreneurship because I had no real business because the Lord told me to shut that down. I've just felt so vulnerable, so insecure and so inadequate. I remember him telling me to go on this tour and I felt inadequate. I didn't have the resources. I felt too broken to go and pour into these people in these different cities. I remember all of the

process and all of the blind obedience that led to these places. I remember when I made my first six figures that I went from being a type of person that calculated how much I needed to make a day in order to make at least $100,000 about the end of the year to making over $100,000 and not even realizing it because I had been so committed to the Lord's process that I wasn't even checking my bank account. And I was so used to being broke and tired of being triggered up my bank account that up until that point that I didn't look at it.

that my husband had to tell me, hey, I think you need to see this and send me a screenshot of our accounting system that shows that I reached that goal. I remember just tearing up and crying because I knew that the Lord was doing something in me. So while that is an accomplishment to other people, that was not the accomplishment to me. The accomplishment was that the Lord took this prideful overachieving

high achieving girl who just knew that she was going to be at the top of whatever she did because she worked hard. She's going to be on the block before anybody get there and she's going to be there after because she's going to outwork everybody. She ain't taking no for answer. All of this bravado in his chest poked out in his pride. That's who I was. He took this girl who had all these vision boards and just knew that she was going to make those things a reality and he humbled her.

And he loved her through all of the insecurities that built that persona in the first place. And then not only did he do that, but he still blessed me with what I asked him for. But after he knew I had the character to sustain it, I can't be prideful about that. I can't think, oh, I did something when that was the process. All I could do was get on my knees and say, thank you, Jesus.

Thank you that you took that girl who read the book of Jeremiah and you asked me this tough question of if my life looked like his, would I still serve you? The Lord asked me if you were poor, if everybody hated you, if folks just wanted to outcast you, nobody cared what you had to say, would you still serve me? And I told the Lord in that moment, God, to be honest, no, but I want to so change my heart, oh God.

and to know that he loved me so much that he addressed my brokenness and he put me back together and then still gave me, got me to the point where I was okay if my life looked like Jeremiah and then he blessed me. I can't, I can't unexperience that.

I just can't. And so the prideful thoughts know just simply because I know the context that come with every accomplishment. I know the valley that comes with every mountain top.

And so the resume may look good, the bio may sound good, but I know the unwritten stuff. I know the internal stuff that you can't see that's way more important to me than whatever stuff that the Lord has allowed me to accumulate, whatever success or influence the Lord has allowed me to have. That is nothing compared to how he

healed me, how he saved me, and how he continues to mold me. Nothing compares. It's so funny because I was just telling the person I was interviewing with the other day how my first goal when I became an entrepreneur was to have a six-figure business. And I just told you guys how

when I hit that point initially that I didn't even realize it. And so my next goal was, of course, to get to a million. I will always say, I want to be a millionaire by 30. And so I made my first six figures at like 28, I want to say, because I was 2019. So either 27 or I was 27 or 28 years old. And so my mind, I'm like, okay, by 30,

I want to be a millionaire, but also got like, nevertheless, not my will, let your will be done type of thing. That was my mindset. And we continue to grow our business into the multi, multi, multi six figures. But now I was telling her the other day, I'm like, now, just even as my journey has grown past business into my home life and having children and all of that, I'm like, man, I

Sure, it is still a goal of mine in my life to be a billionaire. Am I pursuing that right now? Absolutely not. Is that my focus right now? Absolutely not because my assignment in this season is to steward my home. The first five years of a child's life are the most formative. So I have a one year old and a four year old. I'm locked in on their development as humans. I'm locked in on their spiritual development. I'm locked in on discipling them.

at a young age. My four-year-old, every time he's scared, he goes to a Christian school and so they associate letters with scriptures to help the kids memorize scripture. The F scripture is fear not for I am with thee. My son is at his phase where he's scared and dark, you know, normal four-year-old stuff.

When he tells me, whenever he tells me he's afraid of something, I say, what's the F scripture? And he says, fear not for I am with thee. So now, whenever he's going into a situation where he's scared, I hear him say fear not for I am with thee. And that is an accomplishment that I promise you is not one that anybody sees, but that is way bigger than anything that can be listed in my bio.

My son stepped on my toe. And I was like, oh, he was like, what happened? I said, you heard me, you stepped on my toe. He dropped down and said, father in the name of Jesus, I plead the blood of Jesus over my mommy's toe. I pray that you heal her toe, heal her from the top of her. He ain't stood up, grab my head to the to the solar feet and grab my feet. And he said, I plead the blood of Jesus in Jesus name. Amen. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. I was crying.

balled my eyes out. And so he was looking at me like, girl, what did you cry for? My husband was laughing because he knew why I was crying. But that the fact that he associates, it's like, I'm scared. So scripture. Oh, you're hurt. Let me pray. These small things are way bigger accomplishments. So I say all that to say, prideful thoughts about what I've done work last. Oh, 10th.

It's not even close to being a temptation because my perspective is locked in to what the Lord has me doing in each individual season.

The accomplishment is just a result of all of that in the Lord's reward for whatever, but it's not the thing that moves me or matters to be quite frank because I have to be in order to truly do business God's way. I have to have a resolve that I'm going to do. He says regardless on if it amounts to an accomplishment or not. My obedience is the accomplishment.

Now, at the same time, let's be honest about the way that pride does creep in. I may not deal with pride in the sense of self-importance or self-exaltation, but I do deal with pride in the sense of self-sufficiency. That's still a point of pride. And so there have been many times where I've encountered a problem or I've tried to finesse my way out of a season of suffering by trying to be self-sufficient.

There was a time in my business where I was trying to make some moves. I was trying to do some things. And in order to do that, you need money, more money. And I was getting a lot of clients. But prior to this, I was very selective as far as like who I worked with. I will only in who I work with as it relates to our service that specifically the management and marketing production of podcast.

My process initially was I had my podcast retreat. After the retreat, which was a two day event, we would have our program that followed. So I would teach them a ton of information at the event. The program that followed was me helping them to apply that information. After that, then they became they were able to be clients of the management portion.

After a while because I'm trying to do some things in business instead of sticking to that process, which is a slower burn because that takes at least about six months to a year because I'm not having an event every week. I'm having an event one or two times a year.

So that pipeline was a lot slower. I was trying to make a little bit more quicker. So I said, you know what, I'm going to just take consultations for people who just want to do our consulting program because, excuse me, our management program, because I had a lot of people who are reaching out. And before I would tell them, no, because you have to go through this process in order to be a part of this. But I stopped doing that because I was trying to grow the business financially.

In doing that, I grew the business financially, but at the expense of so much stuff that I did not have to deal with had I just just stuck with the process that the Lord had already outlined.

So that is a self-sufficiency problem. That was an issue that I created for myself and I had to deal with all the repercussions of that decision based upon me trying to be self-sufficient as opposed to just waiting on the Lord or being open and neutral to how the Lord wanted to grow my business financially because he could have had other ways. But I saw the opportunity

based upon how things were going, and I just took it. And yes, it worked out as far as getting me the money and the growth financially that I wanted. But again, there was a lot of costs and repercussions to that. And I wonder, because I can only assume at this point, because I didn't do it the right way the first time, what would have happened had I just talked to the bare minimum asked the Lord about it.

That was pride. And I eventually shut it down and was like, I'm not taking any more clients at all, no matter what pipeline you come from. And I just have to seek the Lord on what I'm about to do next with this. Witness is what I should have did the first time because none of the money was worth the headaches that I had.

And so in that the Lord has given me great wisdom. And he's also sent me clients that I'm permitted to take that are people that I'm also comfortable working with in this capacity because I was dealing with people who didn't respect me, who didn't respect my team. I was dealing with people I had to hire to meet certain demands that didn't do the work that I needed them to do. It was just a lot. It was a lot.

that I did not have to deal with had I just not tried to be self-sufficient and trusted the Lord. So pride is also shows, it also shows up in the form of self-sufficiency and we have to recognize that too. Cause yeah, you can be a humble person who's not boastful and don't have your chest out and not thinking too highly of yourself, but are you trying to solve your own problems? Cause that's still pride.

Are you trying to solve everybody else's problem in calling it Christlike as opposed to just letting God be God versus you trying to be their God? That's pride as well.

So pride, have I dealt with it? Yes. In the way of that boasting though, but in the way of self-sufficiency, absolutely. And I believe that that is going to be the biggest temptation of those of us who have that resolve that whatever I do in his life is going to be about a grace of God. Still be sober and vigilant about how pride can creep in in other ways as well.

The next question says, hey, Tatum, I hope you and the family are well. You know, I've been a supporter for a while. Yes, that's my girl right here. That's sitting in this email. But I wanted to commend you on this year's podcast episodes. They have been so insightful, deep and full of wisdom.

Thank you. And I pray that you guys have been blessed by this year's episodes because they've been snatching my edges and they've been taking a lot of time and a lot of study in order to be able to communicate them. So this made me feel good that she committed me on that.

My question, how do you handle the overwhelm of transition and newness? I'm in a space where I'm looking for a new job within my field, but I'm also starting a personal styling business. I know God wants me to start my business, but I've also been trying to be diligent and looking for a new job, studying for certifications, et cetera. How does one deal with that? In addition to this, how do you manage your sanity while juggling full-time work with a business simultaneously?

My answer to this is actually super straightforward. My answer to how to handle the overwhelm of transition and newness and also how to maintain your sanity is through two things. Submission and structure. Submission meaning surrender this season to the Lord, meaning

It's very easy for us to, it's easier to be overwhelmed when we pile on everything in our head, where it'll always laugh when I hear people say things like, you know, how do I maintain this? I'm a wife, I'm a mom, I'm a daughter, I'm a cousin, I'm a sister, I'm a friend, I'm a dog mom, I'm an auntie, and I'll be like, well, why?

Of course, if you just name all of those things, you're going to feel overwhelmed. I'm like, did it take all of that? It just is making it feel heavier than it be to be. And with this, I believe when you pile it on like that, just a little perspective shift, when you pile it on like that, it can feel more overwhelming than it has to.

And so I believe that the mindset that could be helpful as far as your sanity and your peace of mind on a day to day is being able to understand like I'm in a season of transition and newness. Lord, I surrender this to you.

I am seeking you daily. I am spending time with you. I know that this is not overwhelming to you. I know that this isn't new to you. You knew that I would be here from the beginning of time. And so God, I surrender this season to you and I ask for your wisdom and I ask for your guidance as I navigate it and just be neutral to what that looks like. I believe when you free yourself from the anxiety that wants to creep in by understanding that you have a savior that is not stressed.

He's not sitting in heaven stressed about what you have going on, who has all of the answers for you and whose voice will lead you exactly to where you need to go. There's a level of peace that we can have. I love us Philippians 4.

six through eight, which says, don't worry about anything. Instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank Him for all He's done. Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Now, the second instruction comes in verse eight. And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing, fix your thoughts on what is true.

Honorable, right, pure, lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. There's your instructions right there as far as the surrender part.

So whatever you need to do, whenever that worry comes up, say, uh, no anxiety. I'm not doing that. No overwhelm. I'm not doing that. Let me pray about this. God, this is what I need. Lord, I thank you for all that you've done. When you worship and you have that gratitude and you remind yourself for all that God has done, it makes the, the, the perceived uncertainties of this season.

less. It makes the perceived danger or the fear or whatever emotion that is presented. So it makes it less able to shake you when you remind yourself of where God has taken you up into this point. And also it's a discipline thing for us to fix our thoughts, what it and what is true, pure, honorable, right, all of these different things that the text says.

So that's my first answer is focus on surrendering. Now the second thing will be structure because logistically you do have a bunch of things going on. And this is where you can bring in a tool like a chat GPT. So one of the things that I love because my life got a lot of logistics as well. I got two kids.

two businesses, one business, we have client needs and deliverables that I have to do. Another business is a brick and mortar that I have to physically go to. I clean the building, I meet customers, I handle requests from potential renters, so many different things that happen even in the responsibilities of those two things. One of my kids is in school, so I have things that happen at school.

events and functions and donations and fundraisers and all that stuff. And then I have my baby who's at home with me that I'm real focused on his development and teaching him and all these different things. So there's just a lot of logistics that are happening. And so something that I use personally is chat GPT. And the way that I use it is I have it set up as a personal assistant. So within chat GPT, you can create a GPT, which is essentially a profile.

And so you teach this profile, everything that's relevant to your life. So I have mine set up as, and I named it, Tatum's personal assistant. I have educated and trained it on my family, on my businesses, what we offer, who I serve, how many clients I got, what I'm doing for each of those clients. I've trained it on my home. I have a husband, I got two kids. I don't eat, like even our dietary restrictions, I'm like, hey,

I don't eat dairy or chicken. My kids and my husband eat all of that. Come up with meal plans that fit our needs. My kids like this. My husband likes that. I like this. I ain't trying to spend more than that. Like all of these different things, everything. I train it on all there is to know.

about me, about my life, about my values. I say, hey, my faith is the most important thing to me. I have to be studying my world. I have to be close to the Lord. I have to incorporate the Word in everything that I do. Disciples my children is a huge priority to me. I don't want to just make them churchy. I want them to be individuals who understand and internalize the Word. So if I'm teaching them something, help me to craft it to where it is, a developmentally appropriate for where they are and it's practical.

for their day to day life. So all of this stuff, all of the different nuances of who I am, what I believe, the logistics of what I have going on and how I want to go about it, I train this GPT on how to do that. And by train, it just simply means you give it all of this context.

And if you're practically implementing this, if you're listening, all you have to do is say, hey, I want to create a GPT, just go to chat GPT, go to the free one and say, hey, I want to create a GPT for as my personal assistant to help me be able to structure my life effectively.

give me some questions that I need to answer in order for it to have the most context to be affected. What it will do is then spit you out some questions and then that's what you use as your template to work to answer all those questions and you upload it into the GPT. Simple as that. And you can even ask it, hey, give me step-by-steps instructions on how to create this GPT and it'll tell you how to do that as well.

So that's what I did. So everything about me, even from the fact that, hey, I'm a morning person. I'm not an evening person. I like to be in a bed by nine o'clock. I can wake up early. I'm cool with that. Don't have me. Don't create me no schedule where I'm up late doing nothing. My brain don't work. So all of that is there.

So I believe for you, you can do the same thing and give it all of these parameters. I'm starting my business, my personal styling business. I am looking for a new job in my field. I want to get a new certification. Tell them what certification it is because it can then pull in what you need to do to study for the certifications and all of that. And so once you train this GPT, then have it create. I don't know when you're looking to do these things. So have some type of

deadline or timeframe as well. So you could tell it, hey, create me a plan for the next six months for the next year or four. However long that is going to allow me to accomplish these goals. And then you can say every week you can go to it and say create me a schedule for this week that is that coincides with this plan.

And so the system will give you that structure that is going to be very helpful for you in this season and that surrender is going to allow you to be sane, allow you to keep your peace and keep your pace with the Lord and be a lot more comfortable as you're going towards this. Because it's labor heavy. A lot of all the things that you're trying to do is going to be labor heavy. And so utilizing something like AI,

takes a lot of brain work off of you. And then you focusing on being connected to the Lord is going to allow your emotions to also be a check and also to make sure that you are moving in the timeline of God as well.

The next question is a podcast question. She says, I started my podcast a few years ago, but struggled to monetize it. So I became consistent in my post and until I haven't posted it all. Sometimes I feel like I don't have anything to say, but I know that I have a story. I'm a stage four cancer survivor who's outlived the so-called prognosis. How do I move forward and do it anyway when my mind has gone blank once the mic turns on?

Great question. One of the biggest mistake that I see podcasters make is you go straight from the, I have a story and I want to start a podcast to then launching the podcast without taking the time in between to develop the show. Show development is such a skip step and it is so necessary to the success

and the longevity of a platform. When I first wanted to start a podcast, I had the idea in 2016, the show launched in 2017. I took a little less than a year to really develop out the idea, to really flesh out what the show was going to be about, what we were going to talk about, how it was going to flow, doing research on my audience, surveying my target audience to see, what do y'all want to hear as it relates to this, what do you

Um, think it's missing in podcast. Do you listen to podcasts? Which ones do you listen to? How long do you prefer now? The question I would ask is do you prefer a video or audio? Just all of these different things. These questions I asked my audience was a part of the show development process doing research. What are the shows out there are similar to mine? What are the reviews say? What are the comments on our social media say? What is there? What feedback is their audience giving? If I search this podcast name on Twitter,

What are people talking about as it relates to the show? And how is that or isn't that useful to what I have going on? Do some research on what the podcast industry as a whole? What's consumer behavior? What kind of shows are most people listening to? How many shows are most people listening to? Do they prefer video or audio? What's the difference? What's that going to the labor going to be like for me? What type of content do people prefer?

How do people find podcasts? What are the top podcasts? What categories? All of these different things is a part of the show development process. All of these questions. None of these have anything to do with your particular story. And I'm not downplaying your story by any means or what God can do with it, but there's a difference between you creating a show that you're trying to set up to be something that's going to be great and something that's going to make impact and income and you just telling your story.

Because if you just want to tell your story, you could just go live posted on YouTube, leave it there, whoever find it, find it, or do the episodes that you did and leave it there, whoever finds it, listens to it, they get blessed. And that's it. But it seems like you really want to take this amazing story that you had and have it make maximum impact. And also have it be something that can be monetizable for you. And I don't think that there's anything wrong with that at all. But in order to do that, then we have to take the necessary steps

to build a show that's going to be able to get you to that point. And I believe that as you do all of that research, so all of those questions and things that I ask are questions that you have to go through as part of your show development process. But in addition to that, you also have to be clear on what the message is.

Like, what is the Lord using you to discuss? Like, how is he using your story? For me, with this show is the assignment is simple. Teach people how to make God the CEO of their business. That is what we do with every single episode and what we have been doing for the last almost eight years.

Every episode, the foundation is the exact same message. We talk about it in different ways. We address different things, but it's the exact same message. So what is the core message of your show? I know the elements of your story based upon what you said, but what is the core message of how the Lord is going to use you to help people. And as you investigate that and get that assignment, as you get to know your audience, because the Lord is going to give you the what the audience is going to give you the how.

So the audience is going to say, hey, I want to deal with the emotions behind having this diagnosis and then also in having my own feelings about it, but also having to manage the feelings of everybody around me, having to be strong for them when I got my own feelings about this diagnosis. Maybe it's the psychology behind this experience that people want to talk about.

Maybe it's the financial part behind this experience that people want to talk about. So allow your audience also to have some say, not all say, but have some say in how you communicate the message that the Lord has given you because that's going to make them truly connect with the message and it's going to allow you to speak to exactly what they want to hear versus guessing. And getting that feedback and all of that research also gives you

deeper insight into the type of subject, it gives you insight into the topics I mean, it gives you insights into how long the show is, what the show flow is going to be, what's the structure, if you want to have segments, if you're going to have guests, is it going to be a guest based show, is it going to be a round table type of show, where there are different people that come on,

and talk about different things. So again, that show development is so key. And it also allows you to be so prepared that your mind isn't going to turn blank when the mic comes on because the mic coming on is really just the last step in all the preparation. So if you already have your notes and your structure and your clear on what you have to say and how you're going to say it, the mic coming on is nothing at that point because you're already ready.

So how you move forward is I would say to start with show development, regroup, and truly develop this show from scratch. And if you have any follow up questions, let me know. Okay. So last question is, how do you know when God is training you or pushing you to step out to a new career? I've had a hard semester teaching this group of students. I've applied multiple places and no one is following up.

This one is tough because I believe that this can really only come from God making it clear to you. And I believe that there's a sense of urgency on really trying to decipher what in the world is going on. Should I stay or should I go because of the hard semester that you've had?

I believe that the Lord always has us in a season of training. And I believe that this is a good time to seek him on how best to navigate or even regroup from the heart semester. I believe that that's a great way to start because it sounds as if the heart semester is what's driving you to apply to new places. I don't know if that's true. I'm just assuming based off of what's in the question,

And because no one has followed up just yet, all you can do right now is seek the Lord on how to regroup from this hard semester and wait for him to reveal what the next move is. I'm not saying don't apply to any new places, but what I am saying is be patient and be flexible and open to what the Lord's answer is. And in the meantime, maybe heal from

the aftermath of what you may be dealing with from this tough season or tough semester. Um, I know for me, if I think back over the years, usually the Lord will reveal a transition to me when there's usually like something that's placed in my spirit that I just can't shape. So it's more than just an idea, but it's something that I keep thinking about that keeps coming up that other people randomly bring up. Like it's this thing where

It's like, why won't this go away? So let me pay attention to it. That's usually when I notice that the Lord is trying to alert me to some sort of transition. I've also experienced it where certain opportunities will come up like the same opportunity from different parties.

And I'm like, okay, why are all these companies reaching out? They generally do the same thing. God, what's up with that? And then I'll ask him, like, are you trying to show me something? And then that's when I'll get the answer. Usually if there's some type of emotional thing that happens that makes me want to transition because of how I feel about the situation, that's usually not when the Lord is truly trying to transition me. It's just simply a tough season.

But who's to say that the Lord won't allow you to transition? You know what I'm saying? Who's to say that, hey, you realize, Lord, this has been a tough semester and it's made me realize that I think I may want to make some changes, but I want to make sure that I'm moving in your will. So can you give me comfort?

help me to process my emotions and also give me wisdom on what's next. It may not be applied for a job right away. It may be the wisdom may be to make some different moves in the interim before the big transition comes. The details of it, I can't say because that's just going to come from the Lord. But what I can say

is that I believe that you should ask, which I'm sure you have, and be honest with the Lord about how you feel about the semester that you've had and your desire to make this transition, and then be patient and see how he's going to respond to that, even if it's not right away. So if you've done all that you can, if you've prayed, if you fasted, if you've sat with them about it, and right now you're just waiting for an answer, then just wait for that answer. But in the meantime, I would also process

How you feel about where you are right now and how you feel about how the semester has gone and allow him to give you peace and comfort and where you are right now, even if you don't have the answer to what you are ought to do next. Sorry, I didn't have like a more clear cut answer, but.

I can't tell you because the Lord knows how to communicate with us. I feel like the same way when you have multiple children, you parent your children differently. I feel like the Lord parents us all differently. There's some clear ways that he of course speaks and communicates to all of us, but I believe all of our processes are so different. The best thing that we can do is be flexible and neutral to how we are expecting the Lord to move, be patient and wait for when he wants to announce the move.

And then, but also seeking for that love and that comfort and that support while we're waiting to know the move.

So I believe I'm going to go ahead and end it there. I hope you guys have enjoyed this mail back episode. I've enjoyed it. I love being able to answer you guys's questions and to speak with you because this is I feel like this is the closest we get to one on one unless we meet in person. But thank you guys so much for listening to another episode of the Blessed and Busted podcast. I love you guys and I'll talk to you in the next episode.