How To Achieve Your Most Ambitious Goals | Ed Mylett

So hey, guys, listen, we're all trying to get more productive. And the question is, how do you find a way to get an edge? I'm a big believer that if you're getting mentoring or you're in an environment that causes growth, a growth-based environment, that you're much more likely to grow and you're going to grow faster. And that's why I love growth day.

Growth Day is an app that my friend Brendan Bouchard has created that I'm a big fan of. Write this down, growthday.com forward slash ed. So if you want to be more productive, by the way, he's asked me, I post videos in there every single Monday to get your day off to the right start. He's got about $5,000, $10,000 worth of courses that are in there that come with the app. Also, some of the top influencers in the world are all posting content in there on a regular basis, like having the Avengers of personal development and business in one app. And I'm honored that he asked me to be a part of it as well and contribute on a weekly basis, and I do.

So go over there and get signed up. You're going to get a free tuition-free voucher to go to an event with Brendan and myself and a bunch of other influencers as well. So you get a free event out of it also. So go to growthday.com forward slash ed. That's growthday.com forward slash ed.

Hey, everyone. Welcome to my weekend special. I hope you enjoy the show. Be sure to follow the Ed My Let Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Today, we're going to cut through all of the BS and get to two of the most fundamental things that I think you have to have in order to go achieve at the highest levels. You know, we talk oftentimes about strategies and tactics and mindset. And there's a million different things that, you know, we could talk about that contribute to winning in life. But at the highest levels,

You would have still it down to two very simple things that I would wish for you. That I see in the people I coach, like if I'm going to recruit somebody into my business, what are the things I look for in them? Is it background? Is it intellect? Is it people skills? Is it their ability to close? There's all these things, the things that I look for in people.

are hunger and focus. It's their ability to be super hungry for what they want, incredibly after it, and the ability to be laser focused. And I want you today to evaluate those two things in you. Let's start with hunger level.

I mean, how bad do you want your goal right now? I think there's a lot of people in the world today because it's a really niche thing to talk about. I want this. This is my outcome. This is my goal. Like, how bad do you want? Do you want as bad as breathing? Do you want it as bad as anything you've ever wanted in your life? And if you calibrate it at the highest enough levels, what I found is the people that are the hungriest, they find a way. When you know why you want something, when it's desperation, the power of being desperate is something that most people avoid. They think desperation is a weakness.

And I'm here to tell you desperation is one of the most powerful emotions you could possibly possess because when you're desperate, you find reserves and reservoirs of ideas, talents, and a strength that you don't know you have when you find yourself in a desperate situation. So ironically, the one thing most people avoid in their life, hunger, which is caused by being desperate. When you're starving, you become desperate. Think of somebody who's starving on the street. They've got to, how resourceful would you get?

if your children were literally starving and you had to feed them, right? So the number one thing we need more than anything to win is hunger, which comes from a state of desperation, yet we're constantly trying to comfort ourselves in the real world to avoid the state of being desperate.

And I'm telling you that I think you need to embrace desperation again in your life. Like, do you want it so bad that you're desperate for it? Let me give you an example. I can tell you that I think the times that you've achieved at the highest levels in your life, you might have been the most desperate. Let me give you an example. If you were sitting here and you're in a meeting right now and someone tapped you on the shoulder, God forbid this ever happened. They said,

Your child's been in an accident and they've been rushed to the hospital and it's grave. Instantly you'd be desperate to get to your child, wouldn't you? Those of you that don't have children, if it was your parents, you'd be instantly desperate to get to them. And think about what happens when that desperation kicks in.

All of the things we worry about, all of our fears, all of our concerns, all of the lack of resources we have immediately fade away because we must get to this child of ours, this loved one of ours. So if you were in the middle of a conference and they said, your child has been in a serious accident, it's great if you need to get to them. Would you sit there and think for a minute?

I don't want to get up right now in the middle of their speech because what will everybody think about me? I mean, I don't want to make waves here. That would go away. Wouldn't you get right the hell up and run out of the room? If when you got to the back of the room, there was a security guard that said, hold on a minute. Stop. Nobody leaves this room. A very important person's up there speaking right now. Would you go?

You're right. Sorry. I don't want to violate protocol. I don't want to go. I don't want to color outside the lines here. You're right. I'll go back to my seat. Would you do that? Of course not because you're desperate. Whatever is required of you to get to this child, this loved one of yours you would do. And when you went out to the parking lot and you got into your car and you realized, my gosh, I forgot my keys. I left them in the room. Would you go, well,

It's just a sign. I mean, maybe I just don't have what it takes to get to my child. That silly stupid story. You wouldn't do that at all, would you? You'd immediately respond. You'd get back up. You'd run in the room. You'd knock the security guard down. You'd go back and get your keys. You'd run back out. When you turn the car on, it didn't start. The battery was dead. Would you go, yeah.

That's just another sign. You know, maybe I'm just not cut out to get to my destination, to get to my child, to get to this loved one of mine. No, because you're desperate to get there, aren't you? So you'd throw the keys away and you'd run. If you had to go to the next stoplight and carjack, of course you'd say, listen, drive me to the hospital. I have to get to my child. And the person said, no, would you stop at the first objection? Would you say, well,

Yeah, I don't know exactly what word you say. No, you don't understand. You're taking me there. And if they hesitate, if you had to carjack the dad gum car, you'd carjack it, wouldn't you, when you got there? And when you got to the hospital, if they tried to stop you again and said, no, no, no, you got to sign in and fill out all this paperwork. You got to do it perfect. You say, no, that's my child. I've got to get to them.

Wouldn't you? Whatever it took, you'd get to that love one of yours. Nothing would stop you. All of the silly things that happen that we let slow us down is related to our lack of hunger and desperation. And so I'm here to ask you, how desperate are you for what you want? Like, here's what I think. I think most people would just like their goals. They'd like their outcome, but they're not hungry for them.

They're not starving for it. They're not desperate for it. But when you start to feel that desperation, it's one of the most powerful emotions in the world because you become so resourceful, you become so determined, and all the noise goes away. See, all of these objections, all of these fears, all of these old stories you tell yourself, all the excuses that you're making, and I love you, so I'm saying this to you.

are all going back to a lack of real hunger, real desire, real desperation, because real desperation is beautiful. The most alive you'll ever feel, ironically, is when you're the most desperate. You talk to people who are the closest to death in an accident, and they'll tell you, ironically, it was the most alive I've ever felt, because you're so desperate to survive. You're so desperate to get through it. Yet in life, we try to avoid this all the time. And I'm here to tell you, embrace the desperation, seek the desperation.

So if you ask me, what do I look for in someone I'm coaching in an athlete, in a business person, show me somebody hungry. I'll take hunger and desire over IQ, over knowledge, over skills every day of the week, because I can teach you skills. I can teach you the lessons. I can teach you the words, but I can't give you heart. I can't give you hunger. I can't give you desire. I can't give you the courage to be desperate, because desperate people look a little funny.

Desperate people don't fit in. Desperate people stand out. You see someone desperate, you're like, whoa, what's going on with them? Desperate people get criticism. And most people would rather not stand out. They'd rather not leave the crowd. They'd rather not take the criticism. They'd rather not take the heat.

So most people say, I'd love to be a millionaire. I'd love to win. I'd love my dream relationship. I'd love the best body I could have. I'd love to be happier, but I don't want to look bad doing it. I don't want to seem desperate. I don't want to seem different. I don't want to step out of the crowd.

And as long as you're one of those people who won't step out, who won't look a little bit funny, who worries more about what other people think about them than truly winning, you're always going to be held back. The number one thing I want is hunger and desperation, man, every single time. So evaluate that right now. Listen to this audio or watching this video.

What's your level of real hunger? What's your level of real desperation? How bad do you really want it? Or would you just like it? Do you need it like you need to breathe? Do you need it like you need to eat? Do you need it like you need to exist?

Or do you just kind of want it? Because you show me two people. You show me one person who's desperate and hungry. You show me another one who'd like it or wants it. You show me one person who's willing to look bad and get uncomfortable and color outside the lines and do whatever they got to do to get to their destination, to get to their child, to get to their dream. And you show me another one who won't, I'll take this person every day of the week. Maybe they don't come from the perfect background. Maybe they don't have all the perfect words.

Maybe they don't have all the right relationships, but they got the goodies, man. They got the one thing you got to have to win, which is hunger and desire and some heart. And I know you've heard these things before, but now I want you to be self-aware. Really how hungry are you? What are you doing to feed your hunger? What are you doing to feed the fact that you feel like you're starving? Because the more you want something, the lack of it makes you more and more hungry. For example,

If I were really hungry and I needed some food, there's one thing to want. It's another thing, when that food's right in front of me and I'm not allowed to eat it, I become hungrier. So the closer you bring what you want to you increases its hunger level. The more repetitious it is, the more you think about it.

the more you bring it into your thoughts over and over and over again, the hungrier you get. That's why repetitive thought about what you want is so critical. So evaluate that. Am I as hungry as I could be? Am I as starving as I could be? Do I want it so bad I'm desperate for it? Do I want it like that person who has to get to their child or their loved one? Or would I just like it? What I hope for it? Because as long as you're one of those people, see in a fight,

You show me two people. This is why it's so hard to repeat as a champion in the fighting game. Because you show me someone who's up and coming who's hungry for that title, who's never had it before, who can taste it, who knows if they win that belt, their whole life's going to change, they're going to be champion of the world, all the endorsements, all the money, all their family life, all their parents' lives are going to change. You show me somebody chasing that hungry for it against someone who's just trying to hold on to a title.

And that's why most of the time the challenger beats the champ. It's hard to repeat as a champion because the hunger goes down just a little bit. The greatest athletes, the Kobe's, the Brady's, the Jordans of sports have a way of feeding their hunger all the time and increasing it. What separates them isn't just their work ethic, isn't just their talent, although those things matter, isn't just they practice more. What separates them is their

They're just hungrier. They somehow find a way as they climb up the ranks and win championship to get even hungrier for more, where 99% of the athletes lose just a little bit of their edge once they get that first championship, that first pro contract, that first big amount of money, that first world championship. They just lose their hunger a little bit. And then there's the elite. They get hungrier. It feeds the beast.

For some of you, have you been hungrier in the past? Let's be honest. In the past, were you hungrier for that first promotion, hungrier for that first goal, hungrier for the first house, hungrier for the first relationship, hungrier for the first time you got fit. And have you lost a little of that hunger where you're just not quite as desperate as you used to be?

And so it's feeding your desperation. And the way we do that is we feed it to ourselves over and over again because it becomes something we must have. We have to have it like we got to eat, like we got to breathe. Feed the hunger, feed the desperation, embrace it. Don't try to look so pretty because this desperate state eliminates all the things that hold you back.

Your fears, your worries, what you don't know, what the obstacles are. Signs, haters, lack of information, lack of blah, blah, blah. It all goes away when you're hungry. The second thing is focus. Can you get laser focused? Human beings can get incredibly great at

anything they put their minds to. Total immersion at any topic. Most human beings can become great if they give themselves enough time. The truth is most people overestimate what they can do in a month or a year and they dramatically underestimate what they can do in five years or ten years.

If you get total immersion in a business, total immersion in your body, total immersion in your faith, you totally get laser obsessed, focused at something. It's incredible how great human beings are in adapting and becoming great at it. One example is cancer.

My dad, as many of you know, is fighting a particular type of cancer called liposarcoma. I didn't know how to spell liposarcoma three or four years ago. I didn't know what existed. I didn't know what it was or how it functioned. I'm not an oncologist. I'm not a doctor. I'd never read anything about it.

But all of a sudden, liposarcoma became pretty important to me. And I consider myself now. I've read hundreds of periodicals and articles and I've asked questions and talked to other doctors. And you know what? I know an awful lot about something I knew nothing about many years ago. And I've become kind of an expert on it. I've had my own conditions with my heart. I know a lot about the heart. I know a lot about the medications. I understand

inflammation in the body. I've become sort of a quasi expert on two things I knew nothing about. Many, many years ago, I knew nothing about communicating on camera or starting a podcast. I'll tell you a funny story. When my podcast started, I was encouraged to do it by Tony Robbins. And when my podcast started, he said, Hey, you got to order people say, I know you're listening to the number one business podcast in the world that didn't even exist two years ago.

I knew nothing about podcasting, nothing about how this worked. I did not even know what a podcast was. I want you to understand something. When I was first told to have a podcast, I did not know what one was. And so he says, you got to have one of these. I said, what are they? Where do you get the microphones? Where do you get the stuff you talk to before I had this stuff on camera? This is a true story. He goes, I don't know. Figure it out. My team did it all for me. I'm like, OK. So I Google.

How to start a podcast. This is how I began what you're listening to right now. Number one in the world right now. Fastest growing show on earth. I Google how to start a podcast. And Tim Ferriss, who had a successful podcast, had done a podcast on how to start a podcast.

And so I listened to his podcast. At the end of it, there was notes. And he said, if you click on this link, it takes you to Amazon. There's a kit there with the microphones on the recording device and all the stuff you do to start a podcast. I thought, OK. So this started by me googling how to start a podcast. Tim Ferriss at a kit. I listened to the show. I bought the kit. I got back and I said, Tony, I said, so now what do I do? He goes, I don't know. Set the mics up and just start talking about something.

And I'm like, all right. So I do like a 30 minute audio. I set the mics up. I got all the equipment Tim Ferris said you should have. And I'm done. And I call him back and I said, hey, brother, I did the podcast. How do I get what I said out of the machine? There he goes.

I don't know. Well, it's on the chip. Take the chip. Now, here's how stupid I am. I'm like, chips? There's no chips. Yeah, there's a chip you put in the machine. I go, no one said anything about chips, man. Are you eat these? No, dummy, there's a chip, like a micro something or other. He didn't know either. You put it in the machine.

And I go, shit, I don't think I have one of those. So I look and there's no chip. So I literally talk for 30 minutes into a microphone that never even recorded anything. So then I go, get the chip. I put the chip in the machine. I do the 30 minutes again. And then I call and I go, OK, it's on the chip.

How do you get the chip into the universe where people hear what you're saying? Like I didn't know this big because I don't know. I think you stick it in your computer. So I'm on the phone. I stick the chip in my computer. This is the number one show in the world now. I stick the chip in the computer. I go, OK, it's in the computer. What button do I hit so people in the world can hear it out of my computer?

I'm not kidding you. He goes, I have no idea, man. I don't know how this stuff works. So finally, I figure out, oh, you got to download the chip onto your computer. And then it goes to a thing called Libson. And I knew none of this stuff.

The first podcast I did never got recorded. I googled how to do it. The chips sat in my computer for two months because I couldn't figure out how to get it out of my computer into the internet, okay? That's how my podcast started. But I become laser focused about podcasting. I'm like, oh, then people said, you should record it and put it on YouTube as well. So I've learned, where do you get the cameras? How do they do it? How do they post it on YouTube? What do you type? I knew none of this stuff. My first Instagram video,

Literally true story. I do a 30 minute video. My son's kind of the guru. I do the one minute story rather. I post it. I got three views the next day and one like and I call up. This is what I hear. I call up Tony and I go, hey, no one listened to my Instagram video. He goes, well, you posted it at one o'clock, man. You need to post around breakfast time.

And this is what I hear him say. I don't know anything about this stuff. True story, swear to you. He goes, you've got to post around breakfast time. And dummy, you got no hash browns on your post. And I'm like, trying to not pretend I don't know anything. So I'm going, what are you? I got to post at breakfast time.

Why does there need to be hash browns? This makes no sense to me. So now I'm mad, but I pretend to know what he's saying, and I call my son and say, hey, you said you knew about this stuff. You're 15 years old, you're internet savvy. Don't you know all the videos have to be posted at breakfast times, and you got to have hash browns in the video.

My son's like, dad, why would it matter what food is in your video? I don't know, but he's telling me it has to be breakfast time with hash browns. We went the whole day, my first post lamenting the fact that I had no hash browns in my video. Turns out he was saying hash

tags. But I didn't even know what a hashtag was two years ago. And so finally we figured out the hashtags how to post how to do a podcast. And it leads us to where you and I are here today. That's because I've been focused and obsessed in this field now for the better part of a year and a half to two years.

So not only did I figure out how to get into the internet, not did I figure out it doesn't matter what breakfast foods are in my posts, that it was hashtags. Not only did I understand how what chips were, you don't even know what kind of chips I think he was talking after the hash browns. You don't even want to know. But suffice it to say I figured out what type of chips.

A year and a half later for my podcast now and I like him to do more downloads than Tim Ferriss does and he does a great podcast but after learning about his kit and googling how to do it, to think that it's come this far is mind-blowing because human beings that get obsessed and immersed in any topic can become great at it and so can you. So pick what you want and get laser focused. Begin to eliminate all the distractions. You are not hungry enough.

You are not starving enough and you are not focused enough. I say this to you as a friend. What are the things that are stealing your focus? Who are the people that are stealing your focus and begin to eliminate these distractions? Get laser focus and obsessed on what you want. Be starving and hungry to get it. Be desperate to get it. The combination of desperation and hunger with laser focus over an extended period of time is the formula to be great at something.

and you can apply this formula. Get laser focused, eliminate distractions, eliminate the things that steal your laser focused on it, your research on it, your obsession on it. Begin to do these things and you will begin to change your entire life. Yes, I want your mindset better. Yeah, I want your identity higher. No questions important to have great associations in your life, but dad got it. You've got to get hungry and you've got to get focused. And I know these sound like basic things,

But go to any area of your life you want something right now. Pick the number one thing you want to change. Body, money, business, relationship, faith. I don't care what it is. Pick it right now. One to 10, how hungry are you? How desperate are you? One to 10, the most desperate and hungry you could be.

rank yourself. Number two, how laser crazy, obsessed, focused are you on what it is you want. One to 10, 10 being hyper psycho crazy, obsessed, focused, nothing's in your way. And to the extent you can increase your desperation and hunger and your obsessive focus will be to the extent that you can force because when those things convene and converge,

All of a sudden the collaborations, the people, the circumstances, the breakthroughs, the insights necessary begin to reveal themselves to you and not only that reveal themselves to you with momentum and speed at which you cannot believe you can wake up a year and a half later be number one in the world at something that you didn't even know existed

before. I'm a testimony to that and you can be as well. Your success is going to be predicated more than anything on your hunger and desperation level and your ability to get laser focus and eliminate the distractions in your life. This is what makes us great. I think of athletes that I know, I've watched them get obsessed and hungry early in their careers and as they make a little bit of money, they start, you know, they're a rapper now, now they're an actor, now they're a producer, now they're

a business person and their basketball or football or baseball or boxing or UFC career begins to suffer as their focus gets diminished, as their obsession gets diminished, as their immersion gets diminished, the great ones never lose that. They never lose the hunger. They only increase it over time.

I always try to lay out for you what the solutions are and then I like to give you a plan. I want to give you a four-step plan to both increase your hunger and increase your focus at the same time. So the first step is always to evaluate where you are currently. So give yourself an evaluation as I've asked you, one to ten, how would you rank your hunger and desire level? Are you all the way desperate? Are you the most desperate you possibly could be? Because again,

I promise you, this is a healthy form of desperation. Okay, so one to 10 evaluate where you are and then also give yourself an evaluation of where you are in your laser obsessive focused, one being completely unfocused, distracted constantly, even forgetting what our goals are. Five is, we're on it from time to time, we keep some notes, we evaluate. 10 is just obsessed, crazy, nothing else matters, focused. If you're not at least at a level eight or nine, you're not optimizing your effectiveness level at both of those areas.

Number two, you must become more intentional to change those things. So it's just starting out, everything in life comes from intention. You must intend to increase these things. So I want you to become incredibly intentional at feeding your hunger level. Bringing the goal closer to you, repeating it over and over makes you starving for it. And the more you can increase that state, the more you stay focused.

Ironically, there's a connection between hunger and desperation and focus. They're related. So be intentional about them. The story I gave you about if God forbid a loved one or a child of yours within an accident, can you imagine how focused you immediately become when something becomes that important to you, that desperate to you? What happens is everything else, all the distractions of what other people think about us, any other circumstances, what we don't know, what we don't have, anything scares to us,

goes away because we're so desperate, it increases our focus. If you think about anything you've had that becomes desperate to you, if there was a burglar in your home, for example, and you were desperate, think about the millions of things you're no longer thinking about and how focused you are in on that one thing. We've all had that time when we're laying in bed at night and we think we hear a noise, right? You become so

focused. You hear every little creak in the ceiling, don't you? Every little movement of the floor. You hear your sheets move. Oh my gosh, there it is again. You become hyper aware and hyper focused when you increase desperation. So become intentional as step two. Third, what is your plan? What is your strategy to increase your hunger level and to increase your focus level?

So part of that plan might be I need to be around people more immediately who can hold me accountable and repeat back to me what I've told them my outcomes are. I need to put myself in situations where I'm accountable where I'm a part of a group where I have to report my results to them. Perhaps it's going public if it's your body and going public with this is my intention the next 30 days. This is what I'm going to do. Putting additional pressure on yourself. Perhaps it's shrinking the time frame down.

The sooner we must do something, the more desperate it becomes. In other words, if something has to be done within 10 years, how desperate is that? But if it has to become sooner and sooner and sooner, or even if it just has to be a real date put on it, gives us some desperation knowing that date is coming sometime soon. So what is your plan and strategy to increase your desperation? Increase your hunger level and then focus.

What's your plan to increase focus? Oftentimes that could be a plan to eliminate distractions. What's your strategy to eliminate distractions? It might be I watched too much television at night and it distracts me from my goal. Perhaps you should remove that television from the room. That's a plan

and a strategy to eliminate the distraction. Perhaps it's you're being on the internet too long or playing video games, maybe you need to eliminate them. Perhaps in your nutrition, you're trying to get fit the distraction or snacks that you have in your home or alcohol, maybe they need to be removed from your home. What is your strategy and plan to eliminate distractions and increase focus? Because without the evaluation, without the intention and without the plan and strategy, an actual plan to increase desperation, an actual plan

plan and strategy, get creative, get resourceful. It's only with a plan that you can begin to make changes and a strategy. Otherwise, it's just a thought. And then fourth, what immediate massive action are you going to take right now? I'm talking about right when this audio or video ends. What's the immediate first massive action you're going to take towards that plan?

The first step, the first, it's unplug the TV. It's remove the video game. It's throw out the junk food. It's remove a certain person from your life. I don't know what it is, but what is the immediate massive action? Because if we can evaluate where we are and get very clear, because we can't know where we're going if we're not very clear about where we are. In other words, if life is like a GPS,

And we want to get to a particular destination. The only way we can get clear on getting there is to understand and evaluate and be specific about where we currently are. That way we can build the directions. There's no sense of direction. Not just with where you're going. Where are you? You must know both places. Evaluate what you want and be very honest and evaluate where you are. Now the directions can be drawn out.

So we must evaluate number one. Number two, we must make it our intention to do so. We must get intentional, get specific. There's a power to intention. There's a power to pointing our mind, which is a weapon at these issues. Third is our strategy. What is the exact plan we're going to take? Without a strategy, you have no shot. You must have a strategy. The strategy doesn't have to be perfect. The strategy can evolve, but there must be a game plan. There must be something you're doing.

immediately to start towards this journey. It tells our mind we're making progress. It sends a message of, I'm serious about this. And then fourth, you must take immediate, massive action. Knowledge is not power unless it's applied. And you haven't really made a decision and changed anything until you've taken an action. And if we delay the action to later, we can have all the evaluation, all the intention, and a great game plan. No action, no momentum, no progress.

So what's the one step, the one action that you're going to take immediately towards increasing your focus and increasing your desperation level? What is the immediate action? Once you have those four things, we now have a recipe to change. And so today's message to you was to wake you up.

as a friend, as your brother, is to say, listen, if we're gonna get this done, if you're gonna make things great happen, you gotta get very clear on what you want, very clear. But we have got to get starving, we've got to get desperate, we've got to get hungry to perform at the elite level. And for some of you who are already performing pretty high, the reason these next goals are coming more and more slowly, the reason that progress is slower, the higher you climb, is because you're less hungry, you're less desperate, and you've got more distractions.

Some of you that are starting on the very beginning of your journey towards chasing goals. I'm giving you the recipe. You must increase the hunger level, the desperation level, and you must get more focused. But for some of you have already achieved that are listening to this, I'm telling you, I understand it. I relate to it. You're like that champion who's trying to repeat. And although you're not satisfied with where you are and you have big goals and ambitions, you must get honest. Am I as starving and as

desperate as I was in the very beginning of my career, in the very beginning of my business, in the very beginning of my journey and my faith, the very beginning and the journey of my fitness, whatever it is, because I can promise you, if we drew a line back to where you made the most progress, you were the most desperate. And the goals start coming slower, don't they?

as we become less and less desperate. You've got to feed that. And then the other thing is, there was a time in your life if you were achieving at a high level, whether it was getting your master's degree or graduating college or passing an exam for your business or getting to your first big promotion. I can promise you, if I went back and looked at you, you were laser focused and all the distractions went away. This is the same formula and the same recipe. Success leaves clues. I have a great audio sheet listened to called Unlocking Your Success Code. It's one of the original ones I've done.

If you're on YouTube watching this, go over to my audio platforms on iTunes or Spotify. Search for unlocking your success code. I talk about how the fact that you have a code to your success. If you can repeat that code and apply it to all your goals and dreams, you'll produce the same results in different areas. And so today, I want to challenge you to get very clear on what your recipe is. If you've already been achieving in your life, evaluate these two areas. This is a message from sponsor Intuit TurboTax. Here's the thing.

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That was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed My Let Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. I'm fired up about today's show because we're getting right into what it takes to win. And that is this, write this down. One more, one more. See, I accepted a long time ago, I wasn't the smartest, the best looking, the fast enough with the best background, the most connections. I didn't have any of those things.

What I could control was my work ethic. You've heard me speak many times about outworking everybody, but I think that just feels good when we hear it, but most people don't take it seriously. If you think that I have a little bit of success in my life, I can tell you what I attribute it to. Yes, self-confidence, yes mindset, visualization, goals, all the things I talk about all the time, listening skills, influence, energy transfer, how to be happier, all of that stuff applies. When you get to winning,

For me, it's come down to maxing out. And what maxing out means is you do one more at least than you think you're capable of. So when you're done, whatever you're doing, whether it's at the gym or phone calls or meetings or in sports, one more shot, one more throw, one more swing of the golf club or the baseball bat,

The separator is for the winners. They do one more. I'm addicted to one more. And so I want your mantra going forward to be one more. What does that look like if we're working out? That means when we're in the gym and we say, I'm going to do five sets of 10, I'm crazy. Like I'm a psycho because I want to win. I want to be somebody. I want to separate. I want to compete.

And the way I do that isn't with my giftedness, because I wasn't born with a bunch of gifts. And I think gifts are crap. I think for the most part, gifted people struggle in life because things come easy to them. I like that things haven't come easy for me in my life. I like they don't have natural talents in every area. And maybe you like that about you too. Maybe you've looked at yourself all your life and thought, man, I don't have that natural beauty or that natural talent or this gift for creativity or intellect or humor. I don't have any of those things.

But what I got is I will outwork you. And so at the gym, one of the things I focus on, they say it's five sets of 10. When I'm at 10, I go one more, bam, 11. If I'm running on the treadmill and it's a 45 minute run, I never finish at 45. I always go one more minute, 46.

If I'm at the office and I'm supposed to make 25 phone calls that day, when I'm at the end of the day, I always do one more. If I've got meetings, I always do one more. My mantra for three decades in business has been one more. Why?

Because we get out of life what we think we deserve. And I'm the kind of guy that I know when you do 45 minutes on the treadmill and I do 46, I deserve to be fitter. I know that when I'm lifting weights and I watch you do 5 sets of 10 in every single time, I do one more. When it's set of 5, I do 6. When it's a set of 8, I do 9. When it's 45 on the treadmill, I do 46. When it's supposed to be 20 phone calls, I make 21.

When it's supposed to be an eight hour work day, I work nine. Whatever it is, I always do one more. And what that does is it makes me eventually think, I'm doing things other people aren't willing to do. So I should get things other people aren't gonna get. And if you go to the root of the things I believe philosophically about winning, the people that win the great athletes that I coach, when I watch the really gifted golfer and the one who actually wins, the gifted golfer, they do what they're supposed to do.

You never know they weren't working on it. It's not like people don't work hard. Everybody works hard. That's a given now. But what's the separator to where you become the maxed out version of you? See the gifted golfer, they hit their 100 balls because they're supposed to.

But the not so gifted one that ends up winning, they hit 101 or 110 or 120. I watched them on the driving range and they can hear them say one more, one more. What's the difference between Kobe Bryant and other gifted NBA players when he played or Michael Jordan?

when they play or right now Kevin Durant people tell me or Steph Curry they're constantly when everyone else is done shooting in the gym they say one more Larry Bird was legendary for one more one more the people that would throw the passes to him the ball guys and practice it he always wants more he always wants more

The great hitters that I know, the Mike Troughts and MLB, they're gifted, but they just take a little more. They take that extra batting practice, that extra session. They're always doing extra. That's the separator. You can learn all this stuff. You can digest all the tactics and information that I give out, but if you're not willing to do one more, eventually there's a part of you that says, maybe, maybe I don't deserve it.

I'm just doing what everybody else is doing and that's not good enough. It's not even good enough to do more than everybody else. It's your maxed out level. It's one more of everything. And so whether that's a phone call, an email, a text, an appointment. One more time you tell your spouse you love them. One more time you go in and kiss your children good night. One more hug of somebody. One more phone call. One more everything.

I want your theme to be one more. Have I said that enough times for you today? So what's that really look like an application? Well, the second thing it does for you is you actually do more reps of whatever it is you're doing. And when we do more repetitions, we get better. And when we do more repetitions, we're more productive. So number one is the psychology part.

If you're someone who's always doing things other people aren't willing to do, you always max out. You always go to the next level. You convince yourself you deserve to win. You can take low self-esteem, low identity, low confidence, and change it over time by building this habitual addiction to doing one more, this obsession of one more. All the greats do one more and all the average don't. It's not that the average don't work hard. It's not that the average at your company, it's something they don't work hard. They probably work pretty hard.

But do they always do extra? Do they always do one more? Do they always do 10 more if they need to? Do they always get after it? The other part of it, number two, is you just get better because of the reps. You just doing more of something, you get better. You get stronger. You become a better phone caller when you make one more phone call every day. You become a better communicator when you do one more meeting every single day. You get better at coordination in your sport or at the gym by just doing more reps. Yes, you get better. So that's the second layer. But the third one is,

You stack the odds in your favor. See, for me, I want the odds that I'm going to win to increase. The larger numbers we play in life in every area, more is always better. People tell you, more isn't always better, and almost everything more is better, just so you know.

and almost everything. People who tell you more isn't better and most things are lazy. And they try to justify their own weakness. Don't let people who are justifying their own weakness convince you that you work in hard, you doing more isn't the pathway to your success. People say, well, you got to work smarter, not harder. That's a lie because everybody who wins works smarter. The separator is who works harder. And by the way, we become smarter through working harder.

all the new revelations, all the breakthroughs, all the new discoveries always come when you're doing one more. Always come through more repetitions. You find new ways, new strategies, new words, new keys by higher repetitions. So even if you believe working smarter is more important, you will become smarter by doing more. So if you work 300 days a year, let's just say 300 days a year,

That's 300 more phone calls every single year. Over five years, that's 1,500 more contacts. Just think about that just for a second. Over 30 years, that's 9,000 more contacts. What are the odds the person who makes 9,000 more contacts or even 300 more in here are going to win? You give me two average people that walk in a room. Same ability, same skills, same backgrounds, same product. One of them makes 300 more contacts here. The other one, who's going to win?

We know. How about over five years? One of them makes 1,500 more contacts over five years. Who's going to win? Over a lifetime, 30 years of work. One makes 9,000 more contacts. Who's going to win? You stack the odds in your favor. Never mind the person who made the 9,000 more contacts is better. They've got more reps. They've got more confidence. They believe they deserve to win. They just have 9,000 more opportunities. How about a golfer?

One of them makes 300 more swings a year, a year. And that's just one more swing a day, right? And over five years, 1,500 more, 9,000 over a lifetime. Who's more likely to win? So you pick anything you want, you begin to stack the odds in your favor. How about at the gym? If every day you win one more minute in your cardio. So it's supposed to be 45, you do 46. Do you know what that starts to do to you? You start knowing you're different.

You start knowing you obliterate standards. You start knowing you can break through. When you break through an artificial barrier like 45 minutes, you do one more. It sets a catalyst for your entire day. It sets a syntax. It sets a mindset for the rest of your life. Never mind the fact that if you do 300 more minutes, which is 9,000 more over your lifetime, who's going to be more fit? So you begin to stack these things and your entire life changes.

This is what I like to call compound pounding. Most people underestimate what time can do when backed up with massive activity. Right as I'm speaking to you, I'm looking out at the ocean right now and there's a massive rock formation and you can see the rivets and the rocks. And what caused those rivets and the rocks was compound pounding of the ocean hitting that rock over and over and over again.

over and over compound pounding against that rock. And over time, that ocean breaks the rock down over time, where you can see the breakdown in a rock that water does hitting it. Think about that over time. Not one time when the water hits it, not two times, not five times. When you add up years and years and years of that water hitting the rock, it breaks it down.

And that's like getting through to your dream. You have to be like that water hitting the rock I'm staring at right now that over time that compound pounding breaks down the barriers, breaks down the obstacles, breaks down anything in your way of getting to your dream. So I'm sold out on all the strategies and tactics that I teach you. But what I believe in completely is the power of compound pounding. And here's the crazy thing about most people. They will give up on their dream.

before the compounding has been allowed to kick in. So the work at it and the work at it and the work at it and they don't see the breakthrough. But what they don't understand is that rock was getting ready to break if you just keep pounding against it. But because most people don't see the evidence, see if you watch that water hit that rock over one day, you're going to see no difference.

Two days, no difference. Five days, no difference. Maybe even a year. There's no difference. Maybe even five years. But you have the compound pounding of every wave hitting that rock over and over again. There's an inevitability to the breakdown of the rock.

That's true of your goals and dreams as well. There's an inevitability to success. It's not a matter of if it's a matter of when when we adopt one more, when we adopt compound pounding. Do you know the kind of confidence you begin to have when you just accept in your life that I am going to be relentless? I'm always going to do extra and you accept the fact that all things break down over time. All the barriers will go away. All the obstacles will go away. Everything in your way

will go away if you keep after it over an extended period of time. Most people overestimate what they can do in a year. They do. They set up goals for a year and they overestimate where they're going to get to. And they dramatically underestimate what they can do in a decade. And the reason for that is most people don't understand the power of compound pounding. So I want you to accept today that you're going to be relentless, that you're going to keep coming, that you're like a dripping faucet.

You're like those waves hitting the rock. Other people are going to get slowed down. Other people are going to take a break. Other people are going to flinch. Other people are going to cool it. Other people are going to believe they've made it. Or maybe some people are going to believe they can't make it. But you're going to be relentless. You're going to be repetitious. You may not be the fastest. You may not be the smartest. You may not be the strongest. You may not be the most beautiful. You may not have the most articulate thoughts and ideas in the world. But what you got is compound pounding. What you got is one more. And when they get weak, you just keep pumping. When they flinch, you blow their doors off.

That's how you win in life is you keep getting after it and keep getting it after it until the job gets done. You show me somebody you can succeed. So a lot of people can be excited for a day. They can be excited for a month. Some people can be excited for a year or two or three years. But the winners, they stay excited as long as it takes to get the job done. They keep after it until the job gets done. They never stop. They're always after it. And that's where their strength comes from. That's where their confidence comes from.

is knowing their capacity to keep coming at you and that all your competition is going to get weak, they're going to get tired, they're going to surrender, they're going to give in, they're going to think they made it, they're going to take a break, they're going to cool it and you just keep coming. It's just nature, just like the nature of the

the ocean against that rock, it's just nature that you run down your dream, that you knock down your dream. I want you to implement all the things that I teach on max out, all the tactics, all the strategies, but more than anything, I want you to buy into the fact of an inevitability of you winning, that it's inevitable that it might not be a year or two years or three years, but you're gonna stay excited and you're gonna keep doing one more until the job gets done. Today's message is very simple. You can win.

You should win and you will win. I want you to feel this. You will win if you just keep coming. You keep getting after it. You keep doing one more. You can control this. You can't control all the exterior things in your life. People's attitudes, how they treat you. Who cancels on you? Who changes their mind? Who hates on you? Who lets you down? But you can control this. You can always go 46 instead of 45. You can always go 11 instead of 10.

You can always make the next phone call. Always do one more meeting. Always do one more. Always, always, always. And I promise you, you will knock down that rock that's in between you and your dream and make them come true. Today's really simple. You're going to knock down whatever that rock is that's in between you and your dream. You're going to keep after. You're going to be relentless. You're not going to give in.

You're going to be the person who stays excited until the entire job gets done, until that dream is real, and you know long-term all these other people, they're going to flinch, they're going to get weak, and you won't. You've adopted a max-out mindset, and I want to remind you today to stay connected with me. I want you to win. Hope you can feel it today. I want to break it down to its most simple form, which is that you use nature to your advantage.

You use the force of you, the force of effort, the force of sustained effort over an extended period of time to wear out the obstacles in front of you in your dream. I want you to feel the confidence that comes with that. I'm telling you, look at me. Listen to me. You're going to do this. You're going to win.

If, and it's a big if, if you'll just adopt it. It ought to be written everywhere. One more, one more max out everywhere you can put it. It's inevitable. It's not if anymore. It's just when. But let's talk first of all about getting laser focus. And I mean this is your friend. I mean it's talking to myself too. I always covered things that make me better, things that I struggle with. But I got to tell you, I think there's a different level for you.

I mean, I think there's a different level for you to get obsessed, crazy, laser focus. I say all the time, our obsessions become our possessions, but we won't possess them if we're not truly obsessed. I bet there's been a person in your life you've been obsessed with. If you're over 20 years old, listen to this, more than likely, you've had somebody you were pretty obsessed with, haven't you, that you wanted in your life, you wanted a date, you wanted as a girlfriend or a boyfriend or a significant other. How many times a day do you think about them?

How many times a day did they distract you from what you were doing with just the thought of them? In other words, this is what I want you to understand. When your laser obsessed focused, your obsession distracts you from what you're currently doing, not the other way around.

You're not really obsessed with it if you're easily distracted from it. This is so important. You right now can test whether it's your obsession with whether it distracts you constantly. The first thing you think of when you wake up. Last thing before you go to bed. When you have a big laugh, it comes up. When you cry, it comes up. When you're watching TV, it comes up. When you're doing your regular job, but it's your side hustle that comes up. You can't stop thinking about it. It distracts you from the rest of your life.

That's what an obsession does. When it's not really your obsession, the rest of your life distracts you from it. And so the it in your life is so important. But there's all these things that distract us today. I'm going to give you a recommendation. Turn your damn TV off. Turn the radio off. Most of the time. Turn your phone off a lot too.

So here's the deal. The TV is competing constantly to distract you with stuff that really doesn't matter. I'm not saying, by the way, don't be informed, don't know what's going on in the world because that makes you more interesting, right? You should know what's going on in the world. But let's be real. Does it really matter what's going on with the Kardashians right now?

Does it really matter? They live on my street in one of my neighborhoods, right? And they're very nice people, but I got to be honest with you. What happens in their life doesn't dramatically impact my, but how many people are more obsessed with the Kardashians? And I can say this is good friends. We have many good friends in reality television. They're even listening to this right now, and they would tell you this.

Don't be so obsessed with them. Be obsessed with your own reality TV program called your own life, right? How about the news? All the time of trying to distract us. Before it was Obama, now it's Trump. You better, Trump's going crazy today. Obama's nuts about this. Healthcare, Iraq, Iran, North Korea, right? Like all these things. And most of these things don't impact our own lives. I'm not saying don't know about them, but it's such a convenient escape from the work.

It's such a convenient escape from our obsessions. The left against the right, Republicans against Democrats. Who's going to be the next president? Who's going to get the Democratic nomination? Can they beat Trump, right? Who cares? Who cares right now? You got to win in your own life. It's like...

When I say this, people say, well, that's not, you know, a very professional evolved opinion. I'm just telling you what it takes to win. What it takes to win is not worrying about all that stuff. That should be the background noise, but talking about it, thinking about it, watching TV about it. Who cares what's going on in the real whatever is of anywhere? Who cares what the Kardashians do? Who cares who's running for office for? I say, well, wait a minute. Aren't you socially conscious? Here's all I know. I've been alive through many different presidents, Republican and Democrat. None of them changed my life.

None of them did, and none of them are going to change your life if we're being real. People ask me all the time, why don't you run for office? Because I think entrepreneurs change the world. I think grassroots movements of good people and communities change the world. I don't think politicians change the world. And I don't mean that negatively. I coach many of them. I coach several of them. I want them to be good ones. I want them to make good decisions.

but I don't obsess about it because it doesn't dramatically impact my own life. In fact, if you think about it, the majority of people obsessed with politics have, I mean, I'm just being this nicely. They don't have much going on in their own life. So it's a convenient distraction to be mad at a politician because you're losing. It's a convenient distraction to get caught up in some issue outside of yourself, so you have to focus on your own life. If you can spend enough time obsessing about what these politicians or reality stars do, no one will look at you.

But eventually in your life, you're faced with you. Eventually in your life, it's you. Eventually it's your life. Eventually they won't be on TV. Eventually it'll all be gone. Remember how obsessed you were with President Obama, whether you loved him or hated him? He's gone now. It's a new guy. And in either two more years or six more years, it'll be a new woman hopefully, right? So getting obsessed with these things doesn't matter. Men, so many of you, obsessed with sports.

Your fans of these teams, did it really change your life when the Patriots won the Super Bowl? Like, if you're a Patriot fan, on Saturday they hadn't yet won, on Sunday night they won. How different was your life? Tom Brady's life was different, yours wasn't. You Laker fans or basketball fans, does it really matter? Like if your team wins, does it really matter? I got news for you guys, you don't play for the team.

You don't. I know you think you do. I know you wear their jerseys. I think it's one of the funniest things in life. And I don't mean this critically, please. I mean, this is a brother, guys. But you're running around wearing a jersey with an other grown man's name on the back of it. Isn't that a little bit ridiculous? I mean, some of you ladies are non-random. My husband needs to hear this. Hey, dude, I don't mean this critically. But really, a grown-ass man, you're wearing the name of another man on the back of your jersey every single day.

Literally, your name isn't Bryant or James or Trout or Brady, but you wear their name on the back of you. Isn't that a little bit odd? We won Sunday. No, we didn't win. They won. You got to go back to work on Monday. You don't play for that team. And it's time you wake up and start getting focused on your own life. I'm not saying don't watch the game.

But being obsessed with it throughout the week, who's injured? Who's hurt? Are we going to win? We aren't doing anything because you don't play for them. In fact, players trade teams so much, which you really are rooting for is like laundry. You root for the team that has like this jersey that's your color, but the players change all the time. You keep rooting for these teams. What a catastrophic, and I mean this is love, because I'm a sports fan. I love the Red Sox, the Patriots. I'm a New England area sports fan.

But I don't really get real caught up in it. I go to enjoy the game once in a while and how great they are as athletes, but what a catastrophic waste of your own life to be worrying about what professional athletes do and pretending to be on their team. You're not on the team. You don't win or lose. They do.

Right? They do. So wake up and get focused on your own goals. You're, oh, I can hear all the women going, amen, tell and preach, right? Ladies, in your cases, it might be your sports team. It might be your politics. It might be the television star. It might be some author you love. It might be something like that for men or women. For women, some of you, it sports as well. But the fact of the matter is all of these things are a distraction from our own lives. You don't play for these teams. You're not on these shows and you don't know these people.

and whoever wins a Grammy or an Oscar doesn't change your life. You winning in your life is what changes it. So tune out the distractions. Will you please turn your TV off, get focused in your own life, invest those hours on podcasts like this that actually impact your life. Invest it on someone social media like mine who's actually putting out messages about your life. And by the way, I say this as somebody who has many of these people on my show.

Many of these people that you admire are friends of mine, as many of you know. There are things to learn from them. Absolutely. They're at the top of their craft. But I'm not deluded into thinking a top NBA player is any better a person than a top school teacher or a top nurse. I don't think a top politician is a superior human being over a top landscaper or a top banker or a top entrepreneur.

I think the people at the top of everything there's things to learn from and guess what the people at the top of everything have in common. They're obsessed on their own lives, not other peoples. Those athletes you admire didn't get there by worrying about your life, did they? And so tune out the distractions in our lives, turn the TV off, get some perspective, get obsessed because we do it because it's an escape because we don't have to look at ourselves.

I'm challenging you to look at yourself. Even on the podcast space, narrow it down to the three, four, five of us that make the biggest difference for you. And then when you're done listening to us, go to work and execute, right? You can get over-trained. You can listen to too many different shows. I have to think you should be listening to mine because I think it's the best content. But pick a few, right? Don't be listening to 40 of them because there's time that you could be executing in your life. If you listen to it in the car, at the gym, listen to as many as you want. But in and off of those times, pick three or four and the rest of the time be executing on your dream.

So what I'm telling you is CNN, ESPN, Fox News, right? The E channel. I have friends on all those channels. They're out to take you from your dreams. They're part of the enemy of stealing your dreams because they had just not consciously, but they take your time. They divert your focus. Can you get obsessed on one thing?

What other things divert our focus? The things in life that don't matter, our own negative thoughts, our own insecurities, our own weaknesses, these distract us, failure distracts us, gossiping of other people distracts us, talking about other people, worrying about haters, getting caught up in things that don't matter in our life, drugs and alcohol distract us. There's all these things when you start to pile them into life, what's your distraction? Just be honest, is it living vicariously through your children?

Is it living through them and their soccer team and their little league and their grades? Are you distracted by living through your children? Are you distracted by ESPN? Are you distracted by movies, Netflix, video games, gossip, haters, Fox News, CNN?

Right? Your problems. Are you distracted with things that don't matter in your life? There's all these things competing to get you to not be focused. How about your insecurities? How about your fears? How about your worries? Or your problems? Are you using all of these? Do you kind of? Your relationship issues? Does it distract you from your big goals? Do you let these things? Do you almost willingly do it? Here's what I think.

Most of us are willing participants in our own distraction. And we need to be willing participants in our own focus, in our own obsessions, and getting ourselves back on plan. Because remember what I told you. If you're really obsessed, the obsession will distract you from these things. But if you're not obsessed, these things will distract you from that thing.

And this requires self auditing on your part. And so that's the part one that I think steals more dreams than almost anything in life right now is this obsession with distraction. It's the obsession with other people think about us. It's all of these things competing except the one thing that matters, the one thing. But the best of the past, listen to me, the one thing dominates their life.

The reason some of the athletes I work with have a hard time when they retire. Can I be honest with you? Because they were so great at what they did because they were so obsessed on that one thing. When that one thing is gone, they don't know what to do with themselves with all these distractions now. Because the best in everything don't live with distraction. They live with obsession and focus.

I'm not saying don't be a complete person, but I'm saying for you to complete your journey towards maxing out for you to completely max out your life, you must eliminate all of these things that take you by the wayside. And so now the second part of the coin, if we're going to win, right, is the sacrifice.

I want you to write this down. I need to embrace the suffering. You know, there's something powerful that once you just sort of embrace the fact that in order to achieve something big, you've got to get rid of these distractions. And then the other layer of it is you're probably going to have to have some suffering to get there or some sacrifice to get there. And so once you've embraced and decided that this suffering, this sacrifice you're making is an indicator of progress. It's an indicator of obsession. Suffering and sacrifice and hard work

is an indication of progress towards our dreams. The lack of sacrifice, the lack of suffering in our lives, it's removal, it's non-existence also equates to a non-existence of a great life, a non-existence of a dream happening, a big one anyway. And so embrace the fact that you're gonna have to sacrifice and suffer to some extent. Once you've embraced that it's going to happen, it's almost not that bad. It's kind of like those of you that are fit,

We already know, and you already know, even if you're not, you've sort of accepted that before you go to the gym and get there, you're going to have to suffer. And we go anyway, it becomes a habit. No one goes into a gym thinking, I'm not going to have to sacrifice or suffer. There'll be no discomfort or no pain. But millions of people go anyway, don't they, to the gym. On some level, they're suffering in the gym, whether it's breathing heavy or sweating or aches or pains or stress. Everything in the gym is a sacrifice. And to some extent, you're suffering, going through some pain.

You know it before you go, don't you? Yet most of us go all the time. Yet in life, outside of that one area, most of us are worried about suffering. We're afraid of it. When we're suffering and sacrificing, we wonder whether it's worth it. We wonder whether we're supposed to. We wonder whether sacrifice or setbacks or suffering is a sign it's not our real dream, don't we?

See, at the gym, you'd never think, oh, I'm going through some pain and discomfort. This must be a sign I shouldn't be at the gym. You'd never think that. It goes with the territory. Everyone knows just build a bicep or a tricep or a chest or legs. You have to break it down, suffer and sacrifice for it to grow. So while it's happening, there's no part of you that says this isn't right. In fact, the indication of the pain and sacrifice and sweat, don't you feel better at the gym? You're like, wow, I really sacrificed today. I really suffered.

So in that area, we all know to the extent we suffer in sacrifices, to the extent we grow. And your body is a metaphor for the rest of your life. But the rest of our life, every time we sweat, every time we sacrifice, every time we suffer, we don't do what we do at the gym. We start saying, well, wait a minute. Maybe I'm not supposed to be doing this. Maybe I'm not cut out. Maybe it's not my destiny. Maybe I just can't do it. It's the most unbelievable, ridiculous conclusion we draw. But it's what everybody does, which is another form of distraction, is

doubt. The coins flip on each other all the time, don't they? Another form of distraction is just doubt and doubt comes from the suffer. It comes from a loss. It comes from fear. It comes from the sacrifice. And so just remember this, you're supposed to suffer and sacrifice. So let me ask you a question. What are you willing to risk in order to make your dream come true?

Nothing ventured. Nothing gained. You're going to take a risk. Maybe it's financial. Maybe it's a risk of time. Maybe it's a risk at your job. Maybe it's a risk of looking bad. Maybe it's a risk of failing, of falling on your face, of going broke, of going through pain, of going through anxiety. Maybe it's even a risk in a relationship that's just going to be difficult while you do this. What are you willing to risk?

order to win and you have to accept that because remember what I'm going to tell you the price you will pay for not making your dream come true is far greater than the one that you will pay to make it come true. I'm going to say it again the price you will pay the suffering you will go through to make your dream come true is incredibly small infinitely smaller than the price you will pay if you never do.

You'll pay that one the rest of your life. And so ask yourself what you're willing to risk. What's the price you're willing to pay? Because what most people do when they're trying to chase their dream or their big outcome, the whole time they're negotiating the price in their head, they're negotiating it. Should I continue to do it? Is it worth it?

I don't know if I can continue anymore. It's getting higher and that price is failure. That price is setback. That price is looking back. That price can be financial, literally a physical price. And what happens is if you don't negotiate that price in advance, it's going to steal your focus and energy and become another distraction. One of the great distractions of chasing our dreams is this thing that goes off in our head as we're negotiating the price we're paying.

Shit, I keep paying it. Is it getting too high? Is it too much? And you'll have people in your ear. It's too big a sacrifice. You're going through too much and you begin to negotiate it in your mind. It distracts all your focus. You can't be executing and negotiating simultaneously. If you're in your head negotiating and negotiating and negotiating, you can't execute. So negotiate it now.

Negotiate it with me now. What are you willing to pay for me? When I'm after something big, as long as it's legal, ethical, and moral, I'll sacrifice everything else. But I will not sacrifice anything legal, anything unethical, anything immoral. But beyond that, I'm going to get it. And I know that negotiation comes up front. I accept the suffering. I accept the sacrifice. I know the sacrifice is far smaller than the one I'll pay if I don't do it. And I eliminate distractions. And I go freaking get what I want in my life just like you can. And this needs to be your recipe as well.

If you're one of these people who's still negotiating whether it's worth it, maybe you got someone in your head making you question it. That is a poverty and scarcity mentality. Let me prove it to you. When I didn't have money and I spent most of my life with none, just like you, what do we do when we go into a store? We don't go get what we want. We go get what we think we can afford.

And so I spent the majority of my life flipping price tags over. I didn't buy the shirt I wanted. I buy the one that I could afford. I bought things based on price, not worth. And so I'm sure I didn't buy the car I wanted. I bought the car I could afford. So when I was broke and I had scarcity, what do you do when you're in that position? You negotiate price. You flip price tags. What's the cost? What's the cost? What's the cost? What's the cost? Not what do you want?

I was poor everywhere I went. Flip the price tag. What's your cost? What's your cost? What's your cost? I was constantly negotiating the price for everything in my life. You do that when you come from a place of scarcity, of being poor. Successful people and wealthy people have a subtle distinction. They don't look at price. They look at worth.

Is this worth it? If you're constantly looking at the price tag, you'll eventually relent. You'll eventually give in. Stop negotiating the price. It's a freeing experience to totally commit. When you totally commit to a relationship, to a business, to your fitness, to your faith, it's a freeing

powerful. It's almost like removing kryptonite from your life when you totally commit. Can you do that? The people around you are like, it's costing too much. It's costing too much. And you're going, maybe it's costing too much. You guys are going, no, it's worth it.

It's not the price, it's the worth. It's a subtle distinction in your life. That same scarcity mentality we do in going after our dreams. We want to acquire our dream. You can't be in price tag mode. What's it cost? What's it cost? What's it cost? You never get what you want. Decide in advance what it's going to cost. And then decide, here's the subtle distinction. Successful people don't negotiate the cost of something. They negotiate whether it's worth it.

That's subtle. It's very subtle. If you're a person who's always thinking about what it's costing you and the sacrifice towards your dream, you're always going to be negotiating it. But if you can decide in advance that the cost is worth it, the negotiation stops and you go execute. What I'm telling you is if you really want something bad enough, it's worth it.

It's worth it. So start to feed yourself the worth question over and over and over again, not the cost question. Cost is a distraction. Worth is a focus mechanism. This is so worth it. It's so worth it. It's so worth it. It focuses you. Cost distracts you. What I want to remind you of is on the other side of that suffering, on the other side of that sacrifice.

On the other side of that laser focus is your dream. It's one of the greatest places you'll ever be in your life. And here's what I know, by the way. The times where you've been the most laser focused in your life, listen to me on this. You've been the most happy. The times you've been the most distracted, you've been the most unhappy. Ladies, if you're listening to this, you think about the times where maybe when you were pregnant, for example, if you've been pregnant before, and the amount of focus that went in on that beautiful baby you were going to have, the preparation for it.

you're carrying that child right next to you. You can't get more focus on something than something you're carrying, right? And I'll guarantee you during labor, you weren't thinking about your, you weren't thinking about your electric bill or some email you had to return. You were damn focused in that moment and I'll bet that baby made you almost happier than you ever been in your life. For some of you that when you were cramming for finals in your life, right, that first time you were cramming and it was so laser focused on something and you were happy.

You know, the truth is that was a happy time in your life. For some of you that have built some businesses or maybe when you were in your courtship dating, who you're now married to, you were so focused, weren't you during that time with that person? I mean, there was some of the happiest times of your life. The most focused times in our life, the less distracted times in our life, also equals the happiest times in our life. So if you really want true bliss, you want true fulfillment, it comes from eliminating the distractions and becoming obsessed. There are healthy obsessions in life.

And the more obsessed we are about healthy things, the happier we are, whether we're obsessed with the happy times of carrying that baby and having that baby, the happy times of achieving a degree we've had. The obsession we've had when we were dating somebody and we were so in love with them, these times when we're in the healthiest of our obsessions is when we're the happiest. So I want to challenge you today to make that shift

of eliminating these distractions and elevating your level of focus in your life. And remember this, there's three things that I want you to be controlling. Your state, your story, and your strategy. State, story, strategy. What's your state? Are you in a state of focus? Are you pumped up? Are you breathing deeply? Are you lasered in on something? Are you completely in there?

Where's your stated, distracted, diverted state, hunched over, watching TV, looking at your phone, worrying about Iraq, worrying about North Korea, worrying about Trump, worrying about Obama, worrying about an election, worrying about who's in a fight on a reality show, right? All of that stuff distracts us. Are you in a state totally pumped up, totally focused on your dreams, lasered in. Number two,

What's the story you're telling yourself? Are you telling yourself the sacrifice is worth it, the suffering is worth it, that the price you're gonna pay is worth it, and that you're gonna get on the other side, and great things are gonna happen, and your obsessions become your possessions, and this is the happiest you've ever been before, and your life matters, and you're not some fan of some team, you're a fan of your own life, that when we win, we really win. When you win the game of your own life, you really win, not when the Patriots or Lakers win, but when I win, and you're telling yourself that story.

Are you telling yourself the other story? Hey, man, I hope we get our quarterback on Sunday. Man, I hope LeBron can drop 25, you know, and you tell this distracted story that's completely meaningless in your own life about some sports team, right? Which story are you telling yourself, the one of your own life or hiding in the story of other people's lives? Let me say that to you again.

Are you telling the story of your own life? Are you hiding in the story of other people's lives? We hide in the story of other people's lives through gossip of people that are around us, talking bad about them. We hide in reality TV, we hide in the news, we hide in politicians, and we hide pretending we play for these sports teams. Those are all stories about other people's lives. Are you in the story of your own life? And then lastly, what's your strategy?

You've got to execute on your strategy. You have a very detailed plan to make that story. You're telling a reality and everything transforms in your life.

Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Hey, have you ever thought about, like, running a marathon? Because I've thought about it. I'm like, there's an iron man in court of lane where I spent my summers. Just the marathon part of it. I was like, that's bananas, 26 miles, you know? And he ever thought about doing that, or he ever watched one of these iron man's and go, I'm gonna do that someday.

Then I want you to contemplate thinking about doing it 30 freaking days in a row. How about 50 days in a row? How about 100 days in a row? Guess what? I got the dude here today who did it 100 in a row in 100 days. His name is Iron Cowboy, James Lawrence. Welcome to the program, brother.

Hey, Ed, man. I got to tell you, huge, huge love, um, adoration and respect for you. So he's, by the way, the reason I started with 30 and 50 is he's done that. And then when you did the 50 and 50, I'm like, bro, I like you're out of your damn mind, right? And then to go do the conquer 100, but I'm reading about both, you know, both of those last two, it's inspiring, right? But this time, like day five, your shins start exploding, right? Like you're on day five talk, talk us through that. Did you think of quitting then?

So two really cool things happened that took me a little bit of time to realize. I went into it knowing that you can't train for 100 consecutive. You have to adapt and evolve along the way. And I knew, look, the first 15 and 20 of these are going to be hell.

because you've got to get to the point where you're broken physically, mentally, and then push through that. And that's where everybody quits. And if I can push through that, my body's going to adapt and evolve, and it's going to become the new normal. Everybody, I want to write this down. Pull over, adapt and evolve. That's in your business, that's in your family, that's in your fitness. That's the key. Go ahead, keep going.

Yeah, and so when I went into it with an ankle problem that I didn't tell anybody about, and it immediately exploded into my shin to where we developed a stress fracture in the bone. And super long story, but a miracle happened, we ended up getting a carbon plated shin brace that allowed us to offload the shin

and continue on to heal that stress fracture by doing the marathon portion every single day. It was a total miracle, but a complete testament to me that you give the body the tools and assets that it needs to recover, it can still do so under stress.

And that was amazing to me to watch the body heal like that. Now, the shin and the imbalance that created a hip problem became so painful. Some of my worst days, I don't remember them, but we have the video footage where I would be trying to move and the pain would get to a point that I could no longer manage it and I would black out.

And we called him the wingman. My wingman would catch me. I'd come back to and he would do a 10 second countdown and then say, here we go. And we would repeat that until I got to the emotional, but until I got to the finish line that night. And again, it's just a testament to how powerful the mind is. Now, I was angry because I wanted to showcase

how strong our team was mentally and physically. And I wanted to make the 100 look easy. I believed we could do that. And I was angry that I couldn't run. And then I was forced to walk. And it turned out to be the biggest blessing of the entire campaign.

My pain and discomfort forced me to walk. And every single day, we had people from around the country fly in and locals to support us. And without fail, they said, I'm so grateful you're walking because I wouldn't have been able to join you.

Wow, if you if you weren't walking and And I was hard on myself because I was like look I'm an athlete I want to destroy this and as as I

As I got deeper into it, I was like, I'm so grateful for this injury. I'm so grateful I'm walking and my pain has turned into a blessing that other people can join and have an experience and every single day somebody did

their first 10k with me or their first marathon or their first full distance or their first hundred mile bike ride and every single day I got to experience somebody else's first and it was humbling and it was

Yeah, humbling. Well, I mean, by the end of this, you guys, a couple hundred people riding the cyclists with them. And you, I actually, for you, am grateful that it didn't look easy because I think you connected, at least with me watching you struggle. I'm on Instagram every night watching these videos and it was happening and like,

There were literally times for me watching you like I'm in tears like not wondering the next day Just but the it's one of the most I don't even like to say one of the most because when I say that then I have to think of something that I think is more It's just insanely inspiring and I can't think of something mentally or physically I've ever seen close

to this because of the adversity, because of all the people that got caught up in it with you. Also, though, there's an other element of this that, you know, this idea of adapting, I'm so glad that you said that for everybody's sake, but I'm curious of all of them. The one time you did the 50 or this time, was there a moment

where you're like, I'm out. I'm going to tell like, you're literally blacking out, right? So that's insane to me. But was there a time when you just consciously went, I'm in too much pain. I'm in too much. Because guys, these are icy roads, snowy sometimes. You imagine shin issues on a snowy ice. Oh my gosh. Like, like, was there a point or are there lots of points where you're like, I'm out? Where's there one particular bro where you're like, no, no, no, like this time I'm really out. So, um,

My team is world class. And there's the core four of us. It's my wife, Sonny Joe, and then the two wingman, Casey and Aaron. And they were the four of us that can thin through the 50. And then I brought those boys back on for the 100. And they played massive roles. And Sonny is obviously the head of this entire thing. And we just know from experience that it's OK to feel.

It's not okay to quit. It's okay to problem solve. It's not okay to quit and it and

It's okay to process. And I think that's what a lot of people don't do, especially men, is they don't allow themselves to feel in process before they hunker down and keep going. At no point in time was ever any of us saying, you know, we're quit and we got to be talked back into it. But every single one of us had moments where we just needed to cry to feel be supported to where we said, okay,

I've had my two minutes. I'm not going to dwell on it. We're going to quickly turn this around and we're going to get back to work. And that's the reason the four of us are so strong together because all four of us have that mindset. And I will tell you this, the closest that I ever came.

to even considering it was somewhere between 15 and 20 where we were at the peak of that pain where I had a couple days where I was blacking out. I don't remember portions of it. And I remember standing in the shower.

And I kind of just shrugged my shoulders at Sunny and I said, I don't know how many more days I can manage the pain at that level. Because when you've got 85 more days to go, that is so daunting. And when you're broken, it's hard to conceptualize what it's like. And I'll never forget what she said. She said, you're done today. And you don't have to do anything else.

And all you have to do is now trust in the team.

Get out of the shower, go lay on the table and let them take care of you. And then we will face whatever comes tomorrow together. And I think that's what a lot of people don't do is you've got this today's mentality of the people that do decide to show up that it's like, I gotta go in all the time. I gotta go all in all the time. I gotta hurt more than he does. And they don't take two seconds to reset

mentally. And I can't tell you how important that was. And the valuable lesson that I learned was you've done enough today to take two seconds and reset. And as soon as I got into that rhythm, knowing, and again, it takes

it takes putting the right team together and then it takes letting go and trusting the team that you have put together to do their job, to do their part. And that's hard too as a man to let go of like control of every piece of that puzzle and to go, I surrender and I trust you to do your part. And it's hard to find good people nowadays that are willing to do their part. And I have that team. And so when Sunny said,

You've done enough today. Beautiful. And I think that's so important because we go through life and I think we're so hard on ourselves. We see ourselves differently. And how many times in our lives on our journeys, do we take a minute and say, you're enough? You've done enough. And I think it's so important, especially as men, to be vulnerable and just say, I've done enough today, I'm going to take on tomorrow when tomorrow comes.

Today's special. It's not every day you sit across from a three-time Super Bowl champion. But actually, as impressive as his football career was, I liked the fact that the dream didn't stop there, and he was able to post football, create an incredible brand, an incredible career, an incredible life post football. So I just want to pick the brain of the great Troy Aikman. Troy, good to have you. Yeah, great to be on. Great to meet you. I always wanted to ask somebody who's won a lot this.

I'll be honest with you, the things that have happened in my life where I've won in business or whatever, it was amazing. There were elements of it that were better than what I thought it was going to be. But there are also elements of it that surprised me. And I'm curious, you win this as much as you can go back and really be there. You win this first Super Bowl. Maybe you're still in the field, you're in the locker room, it's the next day.

Was it what you thought it would be? Like, did you feel what you thought you would feel? Because there's these new studies that actually say that you get more dopamine in the pursuit of something, but actually when you hit it, there's like a dopamine crash in your brain and it's like, is that all there is? There's a little bit of a letdown. Did you have that happen to you? What did it really feel like? Well, I'll take you back a little bit earlier than that. When I was about 14 years old, I couldn't wait to get my driver's license. I mean, I thought that

anyone who could drive. How could they ever have a bad day in your life? How could you ever be upset about anything? You could drive. Well, you turn 16, you get your driver's license and you learn to drive and all that and you've got a car. And then you realize that, hey, you still have bad days and that always stuck with me. So I've always known that

achievement isn't going to, it's not going to fulfill you anymore. I mean, you're proud and you're working towards that. And you know, you reach these goals, but it doesn't, it's not going to make you any happier. It's not, you know, that comes from a totally different place. Now I will tell you, I was, I was in my fifties before I really figured that part of it out. And so, but when I won my first Super Bowl,

I knew it was at least I knew that was in my back pocket and that's what I was drafted to do. So that's where the satisfaction came like. For the rest of my career, they can't say I can't win the big one. Was it satisfaction or relief?

Great question. I would say, in all honesty, it was more relief. Because I was never one of these athletes who, people would say, how come you don't smile more? You don't look like you're really enjoying playing.

I didn't smile or enjoy until it was over, until we won, until we won the game. That's when you were really able to enjoy the effort, but during it, no, it was a grind. But yeah, I think in all honesty, it was more relief. That's been my emotion too. It's interesting you say that. It wasn't what I thought it would be, although there's other benefits that come with it that you don't dream of or imagine as well, but it's almost like,

Okay, but the other thing that's unique about you brother is that you repeat. And I know it's a team sport, but we're going to get into broadcasting in a minute. Then you repeated. I mean, most of you know this, but if you don't, I mean, Troy has had this prolific career at Fox. Now he's a Monday night football at ABC. He's like, he's the number one towards broadcaster and football now. He's also become number one of that.

Guys that has to leave college to go to UCLA because the offense didn't work for him. Ends up becoming the number one pick in the draft, ends up being one of the greatest quarterbacks of all time, and then after that duplicates it with a career that's been dominant. And by the way, he could be a professional bodybuilder if he wasn't doing that too. So the guy is this finds this way to the top position. But a lot of people don't deal very well with rejection or failure.

but a lot, a lot. And you know this, whether it's been business people you've met in your life or people that are in a good relationship or an athlete, like we're talking about the UFC guys that I work with or the boxers, guys work really hard to win a championship. And then something happens to them after they win a championship, that hunger, the drive, whatever it is, they don't, most people deal very poorly with winning is the truth. It seems like that has not happened to you.

No, it hasn't. And I think in general, most people, well, my approach, whether it's in football or whether it was in broadcasting or it's in my personal life, is that most people aren't willing to do the work. I mean, that's what I believe. And I don't know where it came from for me. I don't know if it was the way I was raised by my father, but

That, to me, is what has driven me throughout my life and everything that I've done. Now, the Super Bowl, as far as that goes, I can't imagine winning a Super Bowl and then not being more hungry than you were. And the reason I say that is because it is such a great experience that how could you not want to go and do that again and again and again? But you played with the guys you didn't?

I've been with, and I've seen those, I've seen those teams and we all see, cause it is. It's a bit of human nature. Jimmy was great in our repeat, Jimmy Johnson. And he treated us harder. I mean, he worked us harder the second year. And it was a reason for that. Jimmy was a psychology major and he felt that, hey, now's when people get complacent, I'm not gonna allow it. And so he worked us even that much harder.

You know, Ed, I'm asked a lot about why I work out so much, why I do all this. And the reason really is simple that I feel like my success as a player was because I just refused to be outworked. And so I was going to do whatever was required. And when I got into broadcast, I'm not the greatest speaker in the world.

But I'm going to give myself at least a fight and chance and I'm going to put more time into this. And so I work hard at trying to be as prepared as I possibly can be to go into a broadcast. And then with the working out now and my personal life,

It's been about discipline and commitment. And if I let myself go, I feel like then I become a bit of a fraud and what I believe is the foundation of who I am and why I've been able to have some degree of success. And so I think when you talk about a through line, when you've been asking me those questions, that's the through line for me. It's discipline, it's consistency.

And it's commitment. Yeah, you're the product. This is an audio show, but we're on YouTube as well. But Troy's in better shape right now than when he played.

I have one of the great fitness icons of all time right here. Mike O'Hearn, so Mike, thanks for being here, man. Thanks for being here, man. It's so good to have you, man. Thank you. What do you mean you don't miss meals? I don't miss meals. Okay, do you do cheat meals? Do you like, do you eat, like, I saw something on your birthday. It looked like you were like, almost paying to eat some bad food. Like it was like a bite to eat or something you had. Like you do tell me at least you have some meals that are you're like, this one's not good for me. I get to eat this. Do you at least have some? I do want to make some.

He takes fruit. I do cheat. I wouldn't say cheat because now today everybody's like, well, I got my high-dye on Sundays. Yes. Because it's Sunday? Come on, that's what I'm talking about. I'm glad this is you because all my boys are that way. And there's a little give on things. I don't give it unless it's going with what my plan is at the time. I'm always getting ready.

always and have never not been getting ready and will they go well you don't compete anymore and I haven't competed right but I get paid to travel to shows and this is one thing I grew up with when I saw guest posters as a kid they would show up and they'd be these big fat guys on stage and

and I'd be like, wait a minute, he doesn't look like the magazine. What's going on? And then you do the sport and you understand there's non-season, there's non-season. And I got to a point where I started doing guest appearances and I like,

I'm going to give them me. I want to be me 24-7. And I was one of these guys, I'm old enough to be around before Photoshop was created. So the cover is the cover. The weights are the weights and no fake weights. It's one of those things that I'm too old school to cheat. By the way, even though you don't compete anymore, you're still getting covers still.

still getting covered stories do you get a couple quick things but what I mean I don't compete yeah I don't compete against other people in a sense yeah I compete every day I know you do I do I've seen your sessions I've talked about training with you I damn well know that you compete dude trust me do you get off fun

I know it's more fun, by the way. I totally agree with you. The reason I love fitness or I love bodybuilding is because I think UFC fighters I've had on here, it transcends whatever the business is. If you're going to win any business you're in, if you're going to win in your faith, you're going to compete that way. You have to compete to get there, right? So you've got to have that hunger and that desire to go, I can do this. I know I can do this. You get off on doing stuff. You get off on doing stuff other guys won't do. Do you think that's why you eat cleaner, why you transfer? Part of it's like I'm doing what they're not doing. It's got worse.

What do you mean? It's got worse, man. I want to give a shout out to my boy. And it's one of these things where when you're thinking you're giving it all, and then somebody goes, and I can do one more percent, and something triggers you, and something fires you up even more.

for my entire career. I won the universe, and I hate the guys that go, because when I was too young, it was like, well, you can't compete against the men. Yeah, I can. And then I was at the middle ages, and I was beating everybody, and I was still doing the covers, and I was still doing powerlifting, and going to body, and doing the martial arts, and doing the gladiators. And I was like, you guys keep saying you can't do things. Who is this that says you can't? You can't model for 40 years.

I'm still on the cover, so I don't get it. So now at this stage it's like I get too many people and I say don't change your mindset because when you come up to me and you go pretty good for 35, right? And I'm like, for 35, man, well, I've got achy knees. Why do you have achy knees at 35? What's going on?

So my mindset is it's not that I'm doing well for a 49, almost 50 year old guy. I'm still crushing 20 year old athletes. The elite athletes. In the point I'm trying

to not yell. And as you hear, I think both of us will go into, the world is becoming an echo. Yeah, you're right. And so I'd rather be the guy, I love this, that shuts his mouth and does it. Does it? Yeah. And I live my life with my dogs and my girl, and I train it for in the morning, and I don't talk about it so much in the sense of, look at me, I'm doing it. Yep, you are doing it. And then if that motivates you,

Awesome. My favorite part about you is your example like screams. You don't have to say anything It's just like so loud what like looking at you watching you train your example like it just it frickin screams man This is the end of the show