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    Believe in Yourself: The Key to Persuasion and Success w/ Robert Greene EP 1441

    enMay 20, 2023
    What themes does Robert Greene explore in his book?
    How does Greene view his own insecurities?
    What impact did Greene's stroke have on him?
    How can deep listening improve personal connections?
    What motivates Greene to write despite challenges?

    Podcast Summary

    • Robert Greene's pursuit of understanding human nature and overcoming insecuritiesDespite success, insecurity is a universal experience. Constant improvement and detachment from emotions can lead to better work.

      Robert Greene's latest book, Laws of Human Nature, is the culmination of over 20 years of research and consulting work, aiming to better understand people and what makes them tick. Despite his success as a writer, Greene is plagued with insecurities and strives to connect deeply with his readers instead of assuming superiority. He believes in constantly improving and not believing in one's own myth. Greene's desire to please people and impress them stems from early experiences but acknowledges the weakness in it. Compensating for insecurities can be a positive thing but detaching from emotions can also lead to better work.

    • Overcoming Insecurity: How It Can Destroy or Motivate YouInsecurity can be debilitating, but it can also drive you to reach your goals. Don't let fear of failure hold you back from achieving greatness, but also prioritize your health in the creative process.

      Insecurity can either destroy or motivate you. Some people have a negative attitude towards taking action, thinking that it's better to be a slacker than to fail. However, constantly doubting yourself can also push you to work harder and create something great. Robert Greene's stroke, which he believes was caused by the stress of writing his book, highlights the question of whether it's worth putting out a masterpiece at the potential detriment of one's health. Despite the challenges, Greene feels that the pride and satisfaction of expressing oneself through writing is worth it. He is already thinking about his next book, which will explore the idea of learning from negative experiences and handling adversity.

    • Evaluating People for Strong Character.Look beyond appearances and focus on someone's past actions to determine their character. Strong character includes adaptability, good work ethic, empathy, and understanding of human nature. Valuing character over superficial qualities leads to better decision-making.

      When evaluating people, it's important to look beyond appearances and focus on their character, which is deeply carved inside them and reveals patterns of behavior that they can't control. Strong character includes adaptability, good work ethic, empathy, and understanding of human nature. To determine someone's character, it's necessary to pay attention to their past actions and not be deceived by their charm or appearance. By valuing character over superficial qualities, we can make better decisions when choosing business partners, romantic partners, or colleagues to work with.

    • Understanding Negative Behavior PatternsIdentifying negative behavior patterns can help prevent future mistakes. Accepting these patterns and finding ways to use them positively can lead to growth and success. Recognizing toxic individuals and avoiding self-sabotage is crucial for personal development.

      People's patterns and their past can give you insight into their future behavior; humans have compulsive behavior that leads them to repeat mistakes. To break negative patterns, one must first be aware of them and be honest about their existence. It's important to not struggle against patterns but find ways to use them to our advantage. Toxic individuals may not be able to change, and it's best to recognize them and not attempt to change them. Self-sabotage can occur by attracting toxic people and having a negative attitude in life.

    • The Power of Attitude on Success and Self-SabotageYour attitude can shape your experiences and determine your success. A negative attitude can lead to self-sabotaging behaviors, while an expansive attitude can lead to more positive outcomes and greater freedom. Cultivate a positive self-image and mindset to shape your reality and achieve your goals.

      Our attitudes and beliefs about ourselves and the world play a significant role in shaping our experiences and determining our success in life. Negative attitudes that are closed off to new experiences and people can lead to self-sabotaging behaviors, such as blaming others and avoiding personal responsibility when faced with setbacks. On the other hand, an expansive attitude that embraces change, accepts others, and takes ownership of one’s actions can lead to more positive outcomes and greater freedom. Our attitudes can also influence how others perceive us and how they respond to us, making it important to cultivate a positive self-image and mindset. Ultimately, our attitude is a powerful tool that can help us shape our reality and achieve our goals.

    • How to Become a Master Persuader: The Importance of Listening and Enrolling Others in Your VisionDeepen your listening skills by focusing on understanding and empathizing with others' motivations. Flip the focus from yourself to others and view them as characters in a movie with their own unique story. This will help you become a master persuader and achieve success in all areas of life.

      Enrolling people in your vision is crucial for success in all areas of life, and it starts with deepening your listening skills. The quality of listening and the emotion involved is what sets apart a good listener from a bad one. To become a good listener, you must be motivated to get inside the other person's head and experience. People are more complicated and interesting than we assume, and understanding their motivations can help you enroll them in your vision. It's important to flip the focus from yourself to others, and view them as characters in a movie with their own unique story. By doing this, you can become a master persuader and get people to say 'yes' to your dreams, goals, or any other aspect of life.

    • Mastering the Art of Personal RelationshipsTo succeed in life, prioritize understanding and working with people by taking small steps to learn about their experiences, ask the right questions, and show genuine interest using both verbal and nonverbal communication.

      The key to success in life is people. To improve personal relationships, one must take baby steps to learn something new about people and genuinely be interested in their experiences. Asking the right questions and being vulnerable can help to make conversations more meaningful. People's eyes light up when a certain topic is mentioned, allowing for a deeper connection. Nonverbal communication is also important during conversations. By being the most interested person in the room, one becomes the most interesting. The book encourages readers to change their priorities and focus on becoming supremely skilled at understanding and working with people in order to succeed in life.

    • The importance of observing body language and facial expressions for effective persuasion.Being aware of others' emotions and learning to infect them with the right mood can be a valuable tool in communication.  However, it requires stepping out of our own self-focus and distractions to truly understand human nature.

      Observing others' body language and facial expressions is key to understanding their moods and attitudes, and ultimately influencing and persuading them. We are animals, vulnerable to the emotions of others, and can be infected by their moods. By understanding this, we can hone our own emotional intelligence and learn to infect others with the proper mood. However, our own self-focus and distractions can hinder our ability to observe people's signs and values. Robert Greene's work reminds us to step outside ourselves and find other people more interesting than ourselves in some ways, to uncover the richness of human nature.

    • The Power of Infecting Others with Your Mood.Our moods have a huge impact on those around us. To be persuasive, we must learn to control our energy and attitude and use them to influence others positively. Avoid judging people - it will not help you to enroll them.

      Our moods are extremely contagious. You can persuade people more through infecting them with your mood than through your words. Your energy and attitude have a significant impact on others. Robert Greene's research shows that the way you approach someone with your energy affects whether they enroll you or you enroll them. The language you need to master the art of seduction is how your moods infect other people. Experiment with approaching someone with a different mood, and you'll see that your thinking will change how they respond to you. The key throughout the book is not to judge people because you won't influence them.

    • The Importance of Acceptance and Humility in Effective Communication and PersuasionDon't judge others and be humble in your communication. Avoid challenging their self-opinions and instead, allow them to choose and feel like they are making their own decisions. Approach all communication with acceptance and understanding.

      The key message from the discussion is that accepting people as they are and avoiding judgmental behavior is crucial to effective communication and persuasion. Understanding that we all have flaws and being humble can change the dynamic of an interaction and allow us to control our energy and behavior in a positive way. Additionally, people have a self-opinion and challenging that opinion can create defensiveness and make persuasion more difficult. By giving people the freedom to choose and experience the perception that they are making the decision themselves, they are more likely to be receptive to our message. Overall, the key is to approach communication with a mindset of acceptance, understanding, and humility.

    • The Power of Validation in Influence and PersuasionFinding qualities others don't usually recognize and validating them can lead to genuine influence. Avoid telling people what to do when they're resistant and work within their mindset. Being a good listener and observer is key.

      The number one need for humans is to feel validated by other people, and this validation can be used as a tool for influence and persuasion. However, flattery and manipulation can be easily detected if it's not genuine, so it's important to find qualities that other people don't usually recognize and validate those instead. One should also avoid telling people what to do when they're resistant, as it just feeds into their rebellious nature. Instead, one should work within their mindset and use their resistance to persuade them. To do this successfully, one must be a good listener and observer, paying attention to others' insecurities and values.

    • The Power of Self-Awareness and Proving People RightTrue fulfillment and personal growth come from understanding oneself, admitting weaknesses, and lifting others up, rather than using external validation to prove oneself.

      Proving people wrong can be a powerful motivator, but self-awareness and honesty are necessary for true fulfillment. Lewis Howes shares his journey of using sports to prove himself and always defending his masculinity, until a realization five years ago that achieving success wasn't enough. He began focusing on proving people right and lifting others up, leading to greater fulfillment and impact. Robert Greene's book emphasizes the importance of knowing yourself, including weaknesses and motivations. It was Lewis's self-awareness that allowed him to see the flaws in his approach and make a necessary change. Ultimately, fulfillment comes from understanding oneself and working towards personal growth.

    • U MGC's Affordable Online Degrees with Career-Relevant ProgramsU MGC offers accessible online education with helpful resources and local career opportunities. Lewis Howes and Robert Greene suggest self-awareness to overcome negative patterns. Enroll by May 31st to save on application fee.

      U MGC is offering affordable online degrees and certificates that provide access to courses, success coaches, and career services. With over 125 programs in career-relevant fields, learners can gain skills local employers are looking for. Additionally, U MGC offers scholarships, interest-free payment plans, and no cost digital resources in place of most textbooks. Enrolling by May 31st will allow applicants to save on the application fee. Lewis Howes and Robert Greene discuss the importance of introspection and self-awareness in addressing negative patterns and triggers in life. They suggest that recognizing and understanding the stranger inside us can help us overcome and avoid destructive behaviors.

    • Finding Purpose through UniquenessTo find your purpose in life, listen to your inner voice and follow your primal inclinations based on your personal strengths and inclinations related to the five forms of intelligence. Your uniqueness is the source of your power and meaningful creations.

      In order to find purpose in life, we must find our own unique voice and follow our primal inclinations. This voice comes from within and cannot be given to us by external sources such as parents or teachers. We must listen to our inner voice, which draws us towards certain activities or pursuits that align with our personal strengths and inclinations. These inclinations are related to the five forms of intelligence: mathematics patterns, kinetic, social, words, and a fifth form. Our uniqueness is the source of our power, and we must follow it in order to create something great and meaningful. When we deviate from our uniqueness, we become weaker and lose connection to who we truly are.

    • Creating a Unique Identity through Discipline and PassionKnowing who you are, developing pertinent skills, and cultivating discipline is crucial to achieve success. Embrace failures and obsessions, find your passion, and become an expert in one area to influence others organically. Understand human nature, and inspire people to join your team on their own accord.

      In life, it's important to know who you are, gather skills, and be disciplined to create something unique by the age of 30. It's okay to have failure and obsessions as they work to your advantage. Finding your passion is essential, and mastering one area will lead to becoming more influential among people. People don't want to be forced, coerced, or manipulated; they want to feel that they're coming to something on their own. Understanding human nature is crucial, and as a leader, you should aim to make people want to join your force on their own volition. You cannot compel everyone in the same way.

    • Motivating through Purpose and Understanding Shadow SidesAppeal to purpose over material gain, acknowledge and use your shadow side, and be empathetic of others' shadows. Robert Greene's stroke revealed his need for independence and self-reliance.

      Motivating people requires appealing to their sense of purpose and cause, rather than just material gain. This is because people want to feel fulfilled and see how their actions can impact the world. Our childhood experiences and societal pressures can create a repression of certain qualities, which later become our shadow side and can lead to sudden bursts of behavior. Understanding our shadow side and using its qualities can be beneficial, but it requires awareness and acknowledgement. Additionally, being aware of others' shadow sides can make us more empathetic and understanding. Robert Greene shares how his stroke brought out his shadow side of needing to be independent and self-reliant.

    • Robert Greene on Embracing His Shadow Side, Finding Purpose, and Being a Nice PersonRobert Greene reveals his struggles with vulnerability and perfectionism, the sacrifices he made for his work, the importance of finding greater purpose, and the value of thought-provoking questions. Despite his reputation, he takes pride in being a nice person like his father.

      In this conversation, Robert Greene talks about the shadow side of his personality, including feeling dependent and vulnerable while also being a hyper-perfectionist. He also discusses the sacrifices he made to create something he was proud of and the importance of having a greater purpose. Despite his reputation for being a manipulative strategist, he reveals that he takes pride in being a nice person, like his father. Finally, he wishes people would ask him more thought-provoking questions that challenge him to think about things he normally wouldn't consider.

    • Embracing Uniqueness: Robert Greene's Path to SuccessDon't be afraid to embrace your individuality and follow your own path to achieve greatness, even if it means going against conventional norms.

      Robert Greene emphasizes the importance of leaning into one's uniqueness and being true to oneself in order to achieve greatness. Despite facing resistance from publishers and others who wanted him to conform to the norm, he chose to stick to his guns and remain true to his unique style of writing. He believes that people should not be afraid to embrace their weirdness and challenge themselves by following their own path. Ultimately, this mindset is what led him to success and recognition. Greene's message is a reminder to all of us to not be afraid to stand out and embrace our own individuality, even if it means going against the grain.

    • Three Guiding Truths for Life from Robert GreeneGive back to the world what you want to receive, beware of toxic people and relationships, and confront fears for personal growth. These truths can help improve relationships and lead to success in all areas of life.

      Robert Greene shares three truths that have guided him in life: the law of reciprocity, the importance of standing up for oneself and recognizing bad people, and confronting fears. He believes that what you give to the world is what you get, and that we are more responsible for what happens to us than we think. He also emphasizes the need to be aware of bad people, as one toxic person or relationship can ruin a life. Lastly, he stresses the importance of confronting fears and overcoming them to achieve personal growth. These truths are powerful guides for understanding people and improving relationships in all aspects of life.

    • Expanding Your Limits and Realizing Your PotentialGreatness means pushing past your limits and becoming something more. Use the laws of human nature to explore your potential and become the best possible version of yourself.

      Greatness means expanding your own limits and realizing your potential, whatever that may be, and going a little bit beyond what you have already created. It could be in being the best possible parent, using your hands to create art or craftsmanship, writing a book, or creating a great podcast. It is something larger than what you were 10 years ago. By knowing the laws of human nature, you can explore a little bit further and become something a little bit more, pushing past your own limits and expanding like a balloon just a little further. Greatness is not accepting your limits, but moving past them to realize your true potential.

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    For more information go to www.lewishowes.com/1660

    For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960

    More SOG episodes we think you’ll love:

    Eckhart Tolle – https://link.chtbl.com/1463-pod

    Rhonda Byrne – https://link.chtbl.com/1525-pod

    John Maxwell – https://link.chtbl.com/1501-pod

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    • Why giving your partner the same grace you extend to others is crucial for relationship success

    For more information go to www.lewishowes.com/1659

    For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960

    More SOG episodes we think you’ll love:

    Eckhart Tolle – https://link.chtbl.com/1463-pod

    Rhonda Byrne – https://link.chtbl.com/1525-pod

    John Maxwell – https://link.chtbl.com/1501-pod

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