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    95. Make People Never Want To Leave You (Manipulation Tactic)

    en-usSeptember 24, 2023

    Podcast Summary

    • Prioritize your own happinessSet clear expectations, be firm about plans, and respect your own time to encourage enjoyable experiences for yourself and others.

      To become the type of person that others don't want to leave, prioritize your own happiness and experiences. Don't let people find you where they left you. This means being prepared to do things alone if necessary and not tolerating flakiness. In the example given, the speaker wanted to go to 6 Flags and grew frustrated when friends couldn't commit to joining her. Instead of waiting for them, she decided to prioritize her own enjoyment and went with her sister. By setting clear expectations and being firm about her plans, she was able to ensure a fun experience for herself. This tactic not only helps you respect your own time but also encourages others to do the same.

    • Experiencing things alone is enjoyableDon't let others' punctuality or communication affect your happiness, enjoy experiences alone if needed, and communicate clearly to set expectations for friendships.

      Prioritizing your own happiness and ensuring you get to experience things you enjoy is crucial. The speaker shares an experience where her sister and she went to an event without their friends due to their friends' lack of punctuality and communication. The speaker emphasizes that one should not let their experience be dependent on others, and that having fun and doing things alone is perfectly fine. The speaker encourages not to speak negatively over oneself and to go have experiences even if others don't join. This experience set a tone for the speaker's friendships, where clear communication and punctuality are expected.

    • Reliability is key when making plansFind reliable friends for plans, make alternatives if needed, and avoid disappointment by sticking with a solid group.

      When making plans for going out, it's important to have reliable friends who commit to the plan. If some friends are being flaky, don't hesitate to make alternative plans with others to ensure a good time. This gives a sense of security and peace of mind. Going out alone may not be preferred, and it's essential not to let unreliable friends ruin your night. Instead, switch plans and find a solid group of people to spend the night with. It's better to have a plan in place than to be left feeling disappointed and ready for no reason. This approach helps ensure that the night is enjoyable and worth the effort.

    • Embrace independence for greater respect and excitementIndependence leads to self-confidence, new experiences, and alleviates pressure in relationships

      Prioritizing self-reliance and independence in social relationships can lead to greater respect and excitement from others. By maintaining backup plans and not relying solely on others for entertainment or validation, individuals can position themselves as independent and self-sufficient. This can lead to increased self-confidence and the discovery of new experiences and connections. Furthermore, being independent can help alleviate pressure and obligation in relationships, allowing both parties to enjoy their time together without feeling the need to constantly cater to each other's needs. Overall, embracing independence in social situations can lead to a more fulfilling and enjoyable social life.

    • Taking control of your time and communicationCommunicate clearly to make experiences seem valuable, reduce flaking and increase respect

      Taking control of your time and being accountable for your own experiences can reposition you in others' minds and make them respect you more. By not tolerating people playing with your time and clearly communicating your desire for their presence without creating pressure, you create a sense of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) and make your experiences seem more valuable. However, it's important to avoid giving the impression that you don't care if they attend or not. Invite those you want, but make it clear that you'll still have fun without them. This approach can help reduce the number of people who flake on plans and make your time more valuable.

    • Addressing disrespect and maintaining respectful communicationEffective communication and mutual respect are vital for healthy relationships. Address disrespect directly, while being understanding of others' time and commitments.

      Effective communication and respect are crucial in maintaining healthy relationships. If someone disrespects you or makes you feel unwanted, it's essential to address the issue directly. At the same time, it's important to be understanding and respectful of their time and commitments. A small example from a personal experience is that in a romantic relationship, both parties being busy can create a sense of respect and prioritization. However, when one person fails to wait for a decision or dismisses your feelings, it can lead to hurt and a need for clarification. Effective communication and mutual respect are key to navigating these situations and maintaining a strong bond. Additionally, the podcast sponsor, HelloFresh, was discussed as a convenient and affordable meal kit service that saves time and effort in meal preparation. The use of code "50aware" offers a discount for listeners.

    • Respecting each other's time is attractiveValuing your own time and not being dependent on your partner's availability can lead to a stronger and more respectful connection.

      Respecting each other's time in relationships is crucial and attractive. The speaker shares an experience where her partner didn't wait around for her response and had already eaten when she was late. This unexpected behavior left her feeling humbled and attracted to him, as it showed that he valued his own time and wasn't dependent on her. This dynamic not only breeds safety and respect in the relationship but also encourages both partners to be considerate and nice to each other. It's essential to understand that being dependent on each other's availability all the time can lead to frustration and disappointment. By setting clear plans and sticking to them, partners can create a stronger and more respectful connection.

    • Turn lemons into lemonadeInstead of getting upset over cancelled plans, make the best of the situation and potentially gain new experiences or meet new people.

      Instead of getting upset or crying over people who disrespect your time or cancel plans, take control of the situation and go have fun. Don't let someone else ruin your experience. The nights where things don't go as planned can lead to meeting new people, having life-changing realizations, or simply having a good night. Going alone or with just one person is still better than not going at all. The person who bailed on you might be impressed by your resilience and change their behavior towards you. Prioritizing yourself and doing what you want to do can actually attract more friends. So, keep moving and living your life to the fullest, regardless of who's with you or not.

    • Seizing OpportunitiesDon't wait for opportunities, they can slip away. Prepare and make the most of experiences to maximize impact.

      Seizing opportunities is crucial. The speaker emphasizes not to wait around for things to happen, as opportunities may slip away. This is illustrated by the quick selling out of tickets to the speaker's live show, which left them excited and appreciative of their audience. The speaker's enthusiasm for their upcoming event also underscores the potential impact it could have on attendees, encouraging them to prepare and make the most of the experience. Additionally, the speaker expresses gratitude to their audience for their support and encourages listeners to engage with their content through various platforms.

    • O'Reilly's team of professional parts peopleO'Reilly sets itself apart with knowledgeable, trustworthy parts people, providing accurate answers and expert advice for DIYers and pros alike.

      O'Reilly Auto Parts sets itself apart from the competition with its team of professional parts people. Their deep automotive knowledge and expertise enable them to provide accurate answers and trustworthy advice to customers. Whether you're a DIY enthusiast or a professional mechanic, O'Reilly's commitment to helping you do things right is unmatched. Their focus on professionalism and knowledge ensures that you can trust their guidance every time you visit their store or website. So, when you need auto parts, remember that O'Reilly is not just a store, but a partner in ensuring your vehicle's optimal performance.

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