Hello, and welcome to the New Mindset Who Does Podcast. My name is Casey Kenney at Case.Kenney.i. Instagram, and this is my weekly podcast where I create short, no BS episodes dedicated to helping you become the person you're meant to be. Leave your comfort zone and live a purposeful and fulfilling life. Let's go.
All right. Welcome to Episode 651. Hello, my friend. Welcome to a fresh new episode of New Mindset, who just as always, thank you so much for listening. Thank you for supporting me in today. I want to talk about the idea of missing someone from afar. Maybe you've heard this phrase before. Miss them from afar. It means in the ruins of a relationship, a friendship ending, something where you didn't necessarily want it to end, but the reality of the situation
necessitated that it needed to end. You walked away in those instances where you did what was right for you, but it hurt, but you still feel the weight of the loss. You still missed them. You missed the moments you had together. You missed the potential you shared in those instances. The most empowering mindset I think you can have is missed them from afar. That is, acknowledge the moments, but move on.
And I just want to talk about what wisdom from afar means and how we can use it to appreciate life's soft, vulnerable moments, shared moments, but also appreciate the fact that we've moved on, we've leveled up, we've reinvented, missed them from afar.
This means allowing yourself to feel the loss, but without letting it consume you. This is about honoring the love, honoring the connection, honoring the friendship you had with someone, but from a distance that keeps you safe in a sense. This isn't about being savage and saying, I forget it meant nothing to me. It was meaningless. I wish it never happened.
No, we are mature and aware and aligned. We're acknowledging the memories. We're appreciating that it was good, what you had when someone was good. This is acknowledging the beauty of what you had, because regardless of how it ended, it was beautiful at one point, but it's acknowledging that that beauty is great, but it's not about reopening old wounds, missing someone.
Missing someone doesn't have to mean running back to them, doesn't have to mean losing yourself and spiraling. It is a quiet, peaceful, centered recognition that that person mattered, but so do you. And now you're moving forward. Miss them from afar.
This means giving yourself permission to let go without any bitterness. You don't need to erase the good memories or pretend they didn't happen in order to move on. I see so many people adopt that mindset. Screw it. Because it ended poorly, that means it was meaningless.
No, appreciate what you had. But instead of doing that with bitterness, you hold on to them as reminders of the love that you are capable of giving, the love you're capable of receiving, and the joy that you can, of course, find again.
missed them from afar. This is a way of saying, I'll cherish the good, but I won't compromise my peace to relive it. This is a boundary. If anything, this is a boundary missed them from afar. It's a boundary that allows you to heal while still being human and appreciating what you want to add. I think most importantly, this idea of missed them from afar. This is this is all about self respect. It is a stand on your feet declaration that
You're human. You feel emotions. Your heart aches for what was. But amidst that, you refuse to shrink yourself to fit back into that space. That's a space that no longer serves you. You'll see more about that in a second. This is about you choosing to focus on your growth, on moving forward, on your happiness, on possibility. Missing them is a chapter and it's valid, but it's not the whole book. So that's the idea of this phrase. Miss them from afar. And I hope we can find a way to do this.
Right? Miss them from afar until we've gotten to a point in our lives where, you know, our arms are full of love so much so in the present that those memories hold very little weight. But until we get to that point, the idea here is miss them from afar. And I think an essential part of making this your mindset is giving yourself credit.
Truly, I talk about this a lot. I think a lot of optimism, hope, faith, whatever you call it, the foundation of those things is giving yourself credit. Specifically, that's credit for your strength, how strong you are. And it's not easy to do this because very often we feel weak. We feel drained. We feel less. We feel lost.
So on Instagram, the other day, I wrote five quotes that I think should remind you very specifically of the things you've done, the decisions you've made that are clear indicators of how strong you truly are. And the context I've missed them from afar, I think these reminders will hopefully really cement the idea of honoring what you had, but affirming your next level.
So, I want to review each of the five here, and just real quick, and I hope they'll make you feel uplifted and reminded of your strength. So, the first one I wrote was, you walk the way from the love you wanted, because it was destroying the love you had for yourself. That's strength. That's what I wrote. Walking away from love is never, ever, ever weak.
I mean, think about it though. Think about how that happened. You walked away from someone. You looked at the thing that you 100% wanted. You wanted love. You wanted connection. You wanted validation. And you said, in the face of that, I want this, but not at the expense of me.
That is never giving up. That is always stepping up, if anything. You chose to protect your respect and your peace, even when your heart begged you to stay, because you realize the love you deserve will not require you to betray yourself. That's a moment that a lot of people never reach. They never act on it.
That is strength. That is strength. Walking away is never a loss. It's self-evolution. You chose to value your worth over the potential illusion of happiness with someone who could never meet you where you were. It's not that you necessarily stopped loving them. It's more so that you started to love yourself more. You found that respect for yourself again. You saw that staying would mean continually losing pieces of yourself and you refused to let that happen.
That choice, though painful, that is a declaration that you will not compromise your identity, your joy, your respect for anyone. And that is strength. Next up, I wrote, you stopped chasing closure from people who never gave you clarity in the first place. That is strength.
This is a strong topic, right? Closure. I think ultimately the idea of closure is a bit of a scam or at least the word closure is a scam or it's misleading at minimum, especially when it's coming from people who couldn't even be honest with you while they had you. And in the sense of not waiting for an explanation from someone that would never come and deciding to give you the peace that you want and you deserve, that is strength.
You learned that you realized, at least, that endings don't always come with answers, and you made peace with that fact, and that allowed you to stand up and move on. It's not weakness to let go, right? We just reviewed that. It's also not weakness to let go without a final word. That is strength, because you recognize that clarity will never be found in their excuses.
Clarity is yours and yours alone, and that is the sole foundation of closure. It's found in your decision to move forward without them. Closure. Again, we all agree, right? Closure is something you won't get from them. It's something you give yourself. But in reality, it's not easy. We want one more conversation. We want to be on the same page. We want this. We want that. But when you stop chasing their explanation, you give yourself the power to heal yourself.
Right? Because you're looking at yourself, you're looking at them, you see the pattern, you see their inability to provide clarity, and you realize it's not about you, it's about them. By stepping away from that, by stepping away from needing their words, you prove that you are capable of giving yourself peace. That is real strength.
What a strong attribute I can give myself peace. I don't need to ask for permission." So that's the second one I wrote. Next up, I wrote, you stopped watering one-sided relationships and started pouring into yourself. That's strength. This one's simple, right? At some point in your relationship in your life, you stopped begging for reciprocity from people who only knew how to take and take and take and never intended to give.
You realize in doing that that your time, your energy, your effort, your love, those things are worth more than empty words and half-hearted effort. And when you start pouring back into yourself, you stop running on the little fumes and little crumbs that someone might have given you.
You become your own source of fuel, of energy. And by redirecting that energy inward, you stop settling for the little things, the scraps, the bare minimum. What better sign of strength is there than that? You stop trying to fix what wasn't yours to fix in the first place, and you started building yourself up instead. You became your own priority. You realize that
The love you give yourself is the foundation for every relationship that follows. That shift is strength because it teaches you that the right people will match your effort. They'll meet you where you are. They won't leave you drained. What a strong sign of strength that you do that. Next up, I wrote, you said this is the last time I'll let someone treat me this way and never looked back. That's strength.
Right? If you ever said that to yourself, this is the last time I'll ever let someone treat me this way. And if you ever acted on it, doing that, drawing a line like that isn't easy. It's easy to say it. It's not always easy to live it. But you've done this at some point. You said, this is my new standard. This is my new boundary. And it's, it's such a powerful thing to draw that line, especially when you've let that line blur for so long.
But you've done this. At some point, in some way, you've done this. You hit your limit. You made a promise to yourself. And unlike times before, you kept it. You became the protector of your own boundaries. You refused to tolerate, disrespect disguised as love, or ambiguity disguised as love, or half-hearted effort disguised as love. You didn't just say, enough is a meant, enough is enough. You meant it. And that's real strength. A lot of people don't have that. A lot of people refuse to stand firm
because it's easier to fall back into old patterns. By saying this and acting on it, you rewrote the narrative. That is the strongest sign that you are in control of your life. You took back of a, back control of a story that had, you know, for a lot of time been dictated by someone else, had been dictated by what you put up in someone else.
By saying never again, you set a new standard for yourself, not just for how other people treat you, but for how you treat yourself. And that's not about them. It's about you finally. It's about you finally deserving better, refusing to settle for less. And that is strength. That is the strongest sign that you are in control of your life. Last one I wrote. I wrote, you chose to break your own heart once rather than let people break it over and over again. That's strength.
I think this is such a tangible, potentially triggering one, right? To face pain head on in a partner, knowing that ripping off the Band-Aid is going to hurt, but it's not going to hurt forever, so you're willing to do it. That is, you're willing to choose the road of healing over the endless cycle of being broken down little by little, little by little of what you tolerate.
A decision like that to break your own heart. This isn't about them. It's about you. It's about you reclaiming your power. You realize that some acts of heartbreak are acts of self-love and disguise. And you survived that pain, absolutely. And as a result, you became stronger. Someone who knows they deserve better. Someone who keeps that promise to themselves.
What better sign of strength is there than that? Choosing to walk away. Again, it's not giving up as we've reviewed. It's choosing freedom. You're not waiting for them to decide your worth. You're deciding it for yourself. And you knew that the pain of that was going to hurt.
But you decided it was better than the slow erosion of your spirit and your joy. That is strength. And I hope this reminds you of the strength that you possess, that you've demonstrated in some form, whether you relate to all of those or just one, but you've demonstrated it in your life. And I hope this empowers you to miss them from afar. And ultimately, I think the idea of miss them from afar or just in general, a mindset of turning the page in life.
It isn't just about letting go, it's about rewriting the way that you see endings, right? Endings. Life is beginning and end, beginning, middle, and end. This is about transforming loss into a moment of clarity where you recognize that growth, joy, fulfillment, it requires space.
And you're moving up, you're not just moving on, you're moving up, upgrade, reinvention. Every heartbreak, whether it's one that you initiated or they, every unanswered question, every moment where you choose yourself over staying in place, this is all fuel for that, fuel for reinvention. And missing them doesn't have to be a weight you carry. It can be a reminder of how far you've come and the strength you've built along the way.
I really think this is a powerful mindset, missed them from afar. It allows you to shift the focus back to you. You stop giving energy to what was you appreciated, but now you're invested in what is. You start asking yourself better questions like, what can I build this time? How can I become someone I'm proud of this time? I think that's the beauty of distance and of space. It creates room.
for new beginnings. Missing someone, right? You can miss someone. It's fine, but you're not tethered to the past. It's a space you're giving yourself now to step into a brighter future. I think maybe the most empowering part of Miss Them from afar is realizing that you are never defined by who left or what ended. You are defined by the choices you make moving forward. You've proven to yourself the strength you have.
that you're capable of walking away, breaking your own heart if you need to, starting over, building something stronger. That's not just strength, that is alignment. And isn't that the goal of life to live in alignment with yourself? To appreciate the good, to release the pain, to focus on what's ahead?
That is alignment. You're reclaiming your story. You're stepping into the life and the worth and the respect you deserve alignment. So that's it. I'll end right here. I hope this was helpful in some way. It gave you something to think about. If it was, I'd be so grateful if you share the podcast with a friend, just send them the link to Apple Podcast or the Spotify. Thank you so much for doing that. And as always, thank you so much for listening. Thank you for supporting me. And until next episode, I'm out.
