128. When it's time to walk away from a relationship

It's important to recognize when a relationship is not working and have the courage to walk away. Whether it's due to lack of fulfillment, unhappiness, growing apart, or even more serious issues like abuse, staying in a relationship that isn't right for you can be detrimental to your overall well-being. It's not necessary for the relationship to be toxic or for your partner to be a bad person in order to make the decision to leave. Your own happiness and satisfaction should be prioritized, even if it means letting go of someone you still love. Remember that you have the power to shape your own life and make choices that align with your needs and desires.

It is crucial to prioritize your own well-being and not waste valuable time on a relationship that isn't right for you. It may be tempting to stay with someone out of fear of upsetting others or being alone, but in the long run, you will only regret sacrificing the best years of your life. While it's normal to have doubts and feel conflicted, listen to your intuition. There is scientific evidence that suggests we have an innate ability to make emotionally intuitive decisions. Trust your gut when it comes to relationships. Your twenties are not the time to be in a fulfilling or strained relationship that hinders your well-being or other relationships. If you have doubts, it's a clear sign that it's time to walk away.

When you no longer love your partner and feel disconnected, it may be a sign that it's time to walk away. Love can be a fickle emotion, and it's natural for the intensity to wane over time. However, if you find yourself no longer excited or passionate about your partner, it's a significant indicator that something is not right. It's also important to consider if you're willing to put in the work to fall back in love with your partner or if the conditions of the relationship are just not what you want. Additionally, sometimes the qualities that initially attracted us to our partner can be the reasons for falling out of love. It's natural for our perception of desired traits to change as we grow and mature. Ultimately, if you no longer have a desire to spend time with your partner and share common interests, it may be time to reevaluate the relationship.

If you find yourself no longer wanting to spend time with your partner or constantly avoiding spending time together, it may be a sign that the relationship has run its course. Additionally, if you no longer care about the arguments or conflicts you have with your partner, it could indicate that you are no longer invested in the future of the relationship. While disagreements are normal and healthy, apathy and lack of effort to resolve issues may suggest it's time to walk away. Furthermore, if being with your partner prevents you from pursuing your own dreams and goals, it's important to prioritize your own happiness and independence. Your golden years shouldn't be spent regretting opportunities missed for someone who may not be in your life long-term.

A healthy partner is someone who wants the best for you, even if it means taking risks and following your dreams that might not align with their own. They are equally invested in your future and support your growth. While it's possible for people to come back together after breaking up, it shouldn't require excessive self-sacrifice. Compatibility goes beyond physical chemistry and includes shared values and open communication about the future, both as individuals and as a couple. You can't change someone through love; acceptance is important. If you have different life goals that could lead to resentment, it's important to have a difficult conversation and consider if you should be with someone who wants the same things or to fulfill your own dreams alone. Relationships require effort, but it should be balanced and reciprocal, with both partners giving back. If you feel unappreciated and exhausted, it may be a sign of an unbalanced foundation.

When it comes to a relationship, it is important to have equitable distribution of labor and investment. If one partner is shouldering the majority of the emotional and mental load, it can lead to resentment and relationship breakdown. Feeling unappreciated and constantly taking care of someone else can hinder personal growth and happiness. It is crucial to be in an adult relationship where both partners feel cared for and their needs are equally important. However, if there is disrespect or mistreatment, it is time to walk away. Belittling, controlling behavior, and coercive control do not come from a place of love, but from selfishness and control. Such relationships can create deep trauma bonds and may be dangerous to leave.

Ending a relationship, even when you still love the person, can be a difficult decision but delaying it only prolongs the pain and healing. It's important to recognize that both parties in a breakup experience grief and heartbreak. The fear of losing what you've invested in the relationship, known as the sunk cost fallacy, can prevent you from making the necessary choice to leave. However, it's crucial to prioritize your own happiness and not remain stuck in an unhappy situation. While it may be challenging to imagine a future without your partner, time is a powerful healer, and there are better things awaiting you. Remember, you deserve the absolute best and there is a beautiful world out there filled with surprises and richness.

Staying in a relationship out of comfort or fear of the unknown is not the best choice. We often convince ourselves that things will change or that our partner will change, but the reality is that people are who they are at their core. Reflect on whether you will be truly happy if things don't change. It's also important to remember that settling for someone who is just "good enough" is not what we should aim for in life. Don't let instinctual fears, such as the fear of the unknown, change, or loneliness, hold you back. Breakups may be scary and uncomfortable, but they can also lead to personal growth. Your future self will thank you for making the difficult decision to let go.

It's important to prioritize your own happiness and growth in relationships. Loneliness may be a natural part of the process when a personal bond disintegrates, but it is just an emotion that comes and goes. It's crucial to ask yourself if the person you're with is truly adding to your life and making you the best version of yourself. You deserve someone who does. Don't stay out of fear or obligation. It's okay to go through trial and error to find the right person, even if it takes time and you feel lost or alone in the meantime. Remember, the end of a relationship doesn't determine your self-worth. You are so much more than your current relationship, and it's essential to show yourself self-love and compassion when making life decisions. Best of luck, and know that you are brilliant.