I don't want to be a first adopter. Let's fucking think he's gonna fall apart.
boom joke do you have zenwood live oh shit oh shit did you really go out by one of those iPhones last night did you order no red band called me and he goes you're gonna get because i asked him a few weeks ago call everybody i want to get the you know i don't know anything about computers so i call red man he's my computer guy so i want to get the iPad the big one the nine-inch one and i asked lady because my phone's fucking up already just because it's way for the eight so i called red man about a month ago he goes wait
And last night he called out of the blue and goes, you got to get online at midnight. And I did it. I did it like an asshole. I just forgot my code. I got through. I got through the second click. You're not going to get through the second click. Click, boom, order. I ordered the silver, black, bam, bam, bam. And then at the end, I had to get the fucking code for iTunes or Apple. I woke my wife up in the middle of the night and said, get the fuck out of here.
So I didn't have the color. She really didn't tell me to get the fuck out of here. So are you fucking crazy waking me up in 12, 15? There's some stupid fucking phone. There's going to be lines around the block at those Apple stores. It's crazy. It's like those sneaker lines. When you see those people out to buy sneakers. Well, that's the Supreme lines now. Supreme has got a whole thing with lines. They wait in line for three or four days now. For what? Almost weekly. For what? I'll show you this. You're probably going to freak out when I show you what they're waiting for. Please do.
shovels bricks with just the word supreme written on it shovels and bricks t-shirts are the main thing what is supreme exactly it's a brand it's a streetwear brand and people wait in line for bricks I'll show you
Fucking kids today. This is what happens when kids don't go outside. They don't play They don't play sports and they stay at home. They just play video games. Nancy Reagan's fault with it. Just say no. These kids smoke dope. They see life for what it is. You understand? I'm gonna wait a line for an hour for a fucking break. Look at this supreme crowbar. They sell a crowbar. Yeah, so the crowbar would just have like the name supreme on it. Okay, who's using that?
Uh, no one uses it. It's like, uh, that's it's real. We have to look into the brand a little bit to understand it, but it's sort of part of the joke almost. They're making parody of the craziness of it all by just throwing their brand name on stuff and people are buying into it. Go back to the other page. So supreme with the top 10 non wearable Supreme products. Jesus Christ. They have fire extinguishers. Yeah.
But some of the clothes are cool. They have none chucks. It's just, I mean, you got to be really into it. And some people are really into it. Like I said, they wait in line for days. A lot of them know are making money off of it because they can buy it for 40 or 50 bucks and flip it for 200. I don't understand. Like, why is everybody buying this? Limited, limited quantities of whatnot.
But what is the big deal about Supreme? You have to look into the history. There's some YouTube videos you can look up. You sound like Eddie Bravo. Got to look into it. Hey, you have to look. It's really hard to explain. And I like can't even take me a half an hour to get into it. I don't want to hijack the show about Supreme right now. Well, I just never I wasn't aware of this. I thought it was just like a t-shirt.
It's where it starts. You're so Josh Martin wears them. He spends a lot of money. He's a fool. Well, he wears those goddamn Yeezys that you wear too. I don't spend that much money. I'm gonna get him for retail. I wouldn't buy him otherwise. Yeah, Josh Martin is like into every trendy thing. Everything that comes out. He's like way ahead of the crowd. That's the supreme. Talk about it. Exactly. Jesus Christ, Joey. I don't give a fuck. I didn't know about this. You buy a hammer. So Supreme on it. The fact they sell Nunchucks is hilarious. Supreme Nunchucks.
Did we wait online when we were camping? No, not for anything. Like last night I was watching something, the real story about the godfather. And they showed when they released the godfather at New York. And there were lines. Yeah, for the movies. For the movies. Yeah, I'm sure I waited in line to go see Star Wars. But not three fucking days. I think we camped out the night before. No, not for a hammer. What did they camp out for back then? They camped out for something. Really?
I feel like the first I ever saw it was iPhones. When the first iPhones were out, I remember going to the mall and going, what in the fuck am I seeing? And there was a giant line outside the Apple store. And this was like when one of the first iPhones was coming out. And I was like, why are they waiting for a phone? You don't have a phone already? Is this the only way to get the phone? It was all so confusing. But it was a thing where people would wait in line and then they would look at each other. And I remember when
I remember when they were waiting in line for Harry Potter, when Harry Potter was coming out and people would drive him by and they were yelling out, Dumbledore dies at the end. They were yelling out all these different spoilers. All I typed in was waiting in line four in Google and the only things that come up are iPhone Supreme and iPhone 8 or gas.
Yeah, gas. We waited in life. That's right. In the 70s with the flag. Yeah. Red, green, or yellow flag. What was that? There was, like in the mid 70s, there was a gas shortage. So green meant that you got gas if you had an odd numbered, like if your license played under an odd, yellow was even, and then red was shut down, bitch.
Oh yeah, that's right. You remember that? They had the flag 73 to 75. Maybe something like that. I don't know the exact dates. Then they had a weird line. Studio 54 had a huge line, but you got picked. Studio 54, the dance club. Yeah, like when Studio 54 was on fire, you showed up and you didn't guarantee to get in. You got picked.
Right. The way they do now in Hollywood, like they pick hot chicks. Right. So they pick hot chicks. What was the thing we were talking about when they, they won't let a guy in without a chick or something. Yeah. There's some formula to go out in clubs and. Yeah, they would. They never would let guys in without chicks. So if you walk into a club with three guys that don't want you, they want the chicks in there first. Yeah. Well, the last thing you want is a sausage fest. Look at all those dudes trying to get in. Look at this dude. Look at this.
That was inside, but outside the deal line of people. Oh, that could be it. No, that's outside. That's outside. That's outside. God, what a zoo. Just to try to get in. Just to try to get in. What was the big deal about Studio 54? You could snore Coke, dance, get your dick sucked and get your shoe shined. They'll have the same place and be home by six. It was a, you know what I mean? Everybody went there. Like this. Who is that? Andy Warhol? That's Andy Warhol. Who's the girl?
Look at her. She's got a beer bottle in her mouth. Champagne? Champagne, yeah. Pretty hot. A fucking black Sabbath that's 454. Wow. Look at Mick Jagger's wife dancing with... Andy Warhol. Look at Liza Minnelli behind him. Wow. So it was just like the place to be. It was the place to be. You could go crazy. Strange. Strange times, huh?
But here's the beauty of it. They have a station on Sirius and it's called Studio 54.
You could just put it on on Sunday nights. They do a podcast. And what they do is they interview people that actually used to go there or work there. And I got to tell you something, Joe, they had a dentist on about a year ago and his wife that it was crazy listening to this interview about what their life was. They were professional dentists making money in New York. They stayed out until five, six every night.
Went home, took the kids to school, went back home, took a nap till one, got up, went to the dental office, worked till five, went home, took another nap, fed the kids, and at nine o'clock they'd fuck him, bring the kids downstairs to their moms, and they'd do it all over again. Five nights a week, over and over, and the lady was saying, not till a year's later, Liza Millie thought I was a publicist.
She goes, she didn't know I was a dentist. They just saw you in there. It was all trust funders. That's all the people who can do that type of shit. Do blow to low hours in the night. You can put it out. They even had an interview about when Bob Hope went to Studio 54. Bob Hope, Bob Hope walked into the studio that knowing what the fuck he was going to, what layer he was going to walk into. He went out to the middle of the floor and started dancing and these chicks got together and started tying Bob Hope up.
Just tying them around like an Indian. He's just there laughing Bob Ope style. Then he's like, it's just a fucking joke. They just left them there. And then just tying them up and left them there. Tons of stories out there like that. But then it moved on. But you got picked to go in there. How did it move on? Like imagine how weird it must have been when it finally the door shut and that was it. The people where it was their whole life for years.
People move on, you know clubs get hot different clubs. I went there one time in 1983 maybe 84. It was done. My friend was already done. Yeah, it was done. It was just a bunch of assholes trying to be cool. Wow. And I found the $100 bill. I was out of money with a bag of blow, no cash. Not a dime in my pocket. And I looked down at four in the morning, it was a $100 bill. And that's how I got to say it. That's how I got home. Wow. And that was it. That's my studio 54 star.
It is weird, the nightclub scene. The nightclub scene's a very strange scene. You know, one club gets hot and then it dies off and the people that are in that business, like try to figure out what makes something hot and what doesn't. You gotta rename places and redo them and reopening and grand reopening and get people to show up. Like I remember hearing that they were paying Paris Hilton like shit piles of money to just show up at clubs. That's it.
The Kardashians, any of those people, they pay a shitload of money. You're there. They take pictures. Your club gets hot. Now, after about a year, you start taking partners.
Yeah. Sure, because you know what's on the way down to against you. So after a year, some guy comes in, I love your plays. And I'll take half. Give me half. And that's how you get out of it. Or you do a lot of people, then they just light the place on fire and stuff from scratch. A little Jewish lightning, and the place starts from scratch. You know, I knew the guy that owned the gay clubs in Houston, like in the 70s. And he was telling me one time, because once we got our use out of them,
You light them on fire. Collect the insurance and then open up another club. That's it, Jewish lightning. Jesus Christ. It's a weird scene, you know? I mean, people that just look forward to just going out and just drinking and dancing and snorting coke every night, just looking for like experience, just something different in a while that takes them out of their everyday grind and just do it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and
The rooftop you paid, like 24 bucks to go in at 11 o'clock and you drank all night till seven in the morning. 24 bucks, all you could drink. It's shit booze. I mean, you're not drinking kovasi, ain't shit. When you're doing blow, you're just burning that shit anyway. You come out to give you some sunglasses and that's it. If you went in after three, it was
It was like 20 something after 11 and then like 17 bucks or you could drink after three. So seven in the fucking morning and people were packed. That's what New York was about back then. It was just people staying out till seven, six. New York is what, a four a.m. last call? When's last call in New York? I have no idea. Florida, I think it's even later than New York. Florida closes for one hour.
Five o'clock in the morning. So let's say you're at the news cafe. Right. And we're bullshitting, we're having a good time. At five o'clock they'll come over to you and say, hey, do me a favor. By five o'clock, the bars on the clothes. So you can't order beer till six, so we just order 25 beers. Anyway, till the ball opens at six, and now you're fucking ready to drink again. I know it's for one hour. One hour.
This was back, you know, 20 years ago, 15 years ago, I'm coming to Grove. What a weird rule. One hour. Remember that place we used to go to? Right down the street from that improv? Yeah, the loose cafe, right? That was a great place. Great place. Great breakfast, great fucking bar. The club went downhill hard, though. Yeah, that club. And that place, well, the whole coconut grove area.
The only thing that's still open to the dueling pianos, the pizza joint, that mall. The dueling piano places still open. Yeah, it's in that little mall there with the movie theater. They always have those right next to improv. It's like they have one in Addison too, right? Addison, they have one up next to John Lovitz up in Universal. They do? Yeah, they used to. If there's a fucking... We're pulling up there. Miami has a 24-hour drinking now. Really? Oh, just Miami? Just in the Miami Entertainment District, it says. Oh, well, that makes sense. It's 4 a.m. Broward County and Key West.
Yeah, a little different everywhere else than Orlando. West Palm is where we always worked. We either worked in Miami at the improv, which is close enough Grove, or we did West Palm after Joel opened up that new place, the big giant place. That's a nice one. That's a great place. Yeah, the new place, though, is like a theater. It's like 600 seats. It's fucking huge. I mean, that's a huge club. It's a great place. That and even for a lot of that was a great club inside the casino, which they're redoing over.
Oh, yeah. That shut down. Oh, it did shut down till next year. Yeah, we have no action down there.
No kidding. That was a fun little club. That's a fun little club. That's a good size. That one in the hard rock is a good size. Last time I was there, there was a couple next to me that was fucking in the bedroom next to me and like animals. I mean like fucking animals. I mean like porno film animals. Like I was lying in bed and I heard and it was in the afternoon I was trying to take a nap and these people were
hammer in it just bang bang bang oh this guy's just fucking hitting it. I was like Jesus Christ. That's that fucking Florida Oxycontin dick. One of those pay relief centers you take two of those things you hit your hammer with a dick ten times and she won't go dead.
Basarutin told the story the other day that I read online on one of Marshall Art's websites about his addictions to art. Right, yeah, that's a great article. Ooh, scary, scary shit. Scary shit. Or he was talking about trying to get off of it and how difficult it was. And you're talking about a guy with like an iron will, you know, and Basarutin. Like imagine the average person who just has a hard time getting out of bed in the morning. It doesn't have a lot of discipline. And they get hooked, like that's it. That's it. You're gone.
It's fucking amazing that stuff's legal. Did you watch 60 minutes three weeks ago? No. That was the whole, that was the motherfucker's motherfucker. What was it? Just about the opioid epidemic and the DEA stopped prosecuting. The word came from, you know, it's just a nightmare. They're fucking terrible things. Listen, those things are terrible.
Yeah, there was a whole article recently about the company that that sells most of the opiates and the family that's behind that company and how many billions of dollars that they've made off the opiate crisis opioid opioid or be it how we say opioid. I always say it wrong. Once that should grips you. That's synthetic heroin.
That's what that, right, isn't it? Yeah, essentially, yeah. It's a bad grip. Like I said, I took a 16th one night in my living room and I had to lay down. And that's my whole resume with Oxycontin's. And I'm a fucking mule. I could eat 2,000 milligrams of THC and live a 16th at one of those pills. I popped, it was just a little piece, nothing. My blood pressure dropped so fucking much.
I just laid down, went to sleep, and I knew my pill career had come to an end. And never even let it start. Really? Never even let it start. Can you believe, brother?
And two weeks is gonna be 10 years since I've done that wipe out. I want you to think about that. Wow. I want you to really think about it. I still remember being at Cobb's with you that January and like going, it's been two months. I don't know if I could really do this shit. Like, I don't know if I control this feeling and I controlled it. So you like when you quit, what was like the first week like? Hell. Hell. First two weeks were hell.
Did you think about going back just like you can't do this? Or did you know that you had had to make a change? I had to make a change. I knew that my spine was starting to hurt. I knew the spine was starting to hurt. Yeah, I was trying to get jokes. Yeah. And just by four in the morning, you know, after you do Coke. Oh, right at the tip over here. A lot of people have done Coke get like Parkinson's. Yeah, fuck that. No, no, no, no. You think that's related?
a lot of old timers that did a lot of coke in the 70s and then they wound up like some serious neuromuscular disease. That's absolute. That shit shocks the essential nervous system. There was times I did cocaine that was like electric. It was like when you put that thing in your head or you get electrocuted, you could feel the electric in your body the next day like that.
Like in your brain, like you can actually see the neural transmit is a fucking non-fire. You could feel that. You know, I could tell when I would go onstage after doing two or three nights a blow that week. I had no control. I really had no control over my material. I had no control over my delivery. That's what I wanted to tell you.
Like you're just the way you came off. Your mind is off? Yeah. Your mind can't grip it. You can't sell the joke. The facial doesn't connect with the hand movement or the breathing. So like I knew that that was always going to be a danger in the future. Now, you know, I take all that for like a year. I drank those. What's your buddy's name that makes the neurosurgeon milkshakes?
the football player that fucking beat the guy up. I took all his stuff for like a year, just to... Did you? Yeah, the orange drink and stuff. Mm-hmm, neuro one, that stuff. Did that help you? Yeah, it felt good. It felt a lot better, you know. I like it. Give your brain some nutrients. Give me some control. Yeah, but 10 years, I mean, that... I had to do a benefit in Hoboken.
And I had gotten high. Like that whole summer I tried to get off coke. I was doing the heroin. I was trying to get off the coke and shit. And then that's September I ran out of heroin. So I was doing it like maybe once a week. And the whole thing went down with Marilyn. I knew I had to stop. And then I had this thing in Hoboken. I went. The whole thing went down with Marilyn Martinez when she died? Yeah, when she was dying. I went back east that week. And she was dying. I don't know what happened. It was like, you know what? I was trying to get coke on Friday night. I couldn't get it. And I just took it for what it was.
I was trying to get coconut salad. I couldn't get it. So fuck it. I took the plane back Sunday. I couldn't get it here. Something happened. I couldn't get it. And then that Monday I had a meeting to do a movie. And at the end of the meeting, the guy said, listen, man, we know about your drug problem.
So before you say yes, we want you to think about this because you can't miss a day on this movie. You cannot be late. If you're late, the whole movie can't shoot because it was a cast. We all shot in one room. It was an amen.
So I thought about it, I'd do it. And that was the roughest fucking month ever. Because I was just going home, and before eight o'clock would start, I would just go to bed. Because eight o'clock was my cocaine time. That's when my body would start to ache. That's when I couldn't even... You could be telling me the most important thing in your life, and I'd be watching you, but I couldn't hear. All my mind was focusing on getting that blow at eight o'clock.
And then I would figure out how to get the 60 bucks, you know, I'm going to go to the ATM machine. I would shoot over the rock and roll routes. There's an ATM machine in front of rock and roll routes right there. Yeah. And I would take 60 bucks out that dog. I would run every red light to get to the ATM machine. We got to give a fuck. We got to give a fuck. And then from there, I would just make the U-turn go to my dealer's house and go home and leave the coke there. And now it's ready for the night.
I was in peace just knowing that the coke was at the house. I didn't have to do it. You know, I've never been physically addicted to something in a way where I had a hard time kicking it, but I've had some psychological addictions for sure. And I think that one of the things that I've gotten out of this month of the sober October thing that Tom Burt and Ari and I are doing,
is that a lot of it is psychological. A lot of it is psychological. Because just knowing that we can't smoke pot or can't drink all month, you start thinking about, oh, we're at the home stretch, November 1st, around the corner, like, I don't really feel like I need to get high. It's not like I need to drink tomorrow. But it's knowing that I can't do it for the month where it hangs over your head. So that's what's even more impressive that you could kick it, because it's not just the fact that you have a physical problem.
But you also have this psychological problem. Like the psychological part of it is like it's a pattern that you're comfortable with. You got used to that pattern of eight o'clock, you're looking for the coke, you go and do it, and then you're off. It's like you're off, even though you're in chaos, your life's in disarray, and you're in the grips of addiction, you're comfortable with that feeling you've been there for. And for whatever reason, when people get used to fucking up and they go, why do I keep fucking up? One of the reasons you keep fucking up is because you're used to fucking up.
And it's not an uncomfortable feeling in the sense that it's even you know it it might suck But you know it's the devil you know You know that was nice. I didn't want to do it. I still did it
I didn't want to do it. Like I didn't need to do it. Like I didn't feel. I just want to do it. But it was just something to do. Like it was just something to do. It was just something to do. But you know, what I tell people all the time is you want to have to quit. It just doesn't happen. Like I quit at 44. I'm no fucking genius. But it took me two years. Like it was a two year struggle. Like a personal little struggle. When did you know that you were free?
Because you didn't go to AA or narcotics and on. I went to one meeting and AA meeting and I went in Hollywood, which everything is good until you go to an Hollywood. Because in Hollywood, you act, you add to dramatic and the actor image to it. You know, if you go to an AA meeting in Jersey, they're in their smoking camel reds fucking talking from the heart. You go to an AA meeting in Hollywood, you got people with AA tattoos on their arms.
Hugging each other, you know, it's a fucking Jamboree. They're just happy to be in AA. That's a new clan that they're in. And then what happens is after about two months in this area for some reason, I know this because I have a lot of friends in AA, somebody approaches you and says, hi, you know, what's going on? You're like, I'm struggling. They're like, why have you seen Dr. Bob?
Like Dr. Bob. Of course, I'm just making this name. Right. Then I talk to Bob. Oh, my God. To tell them about Dr. Bob, tell Joe about Dr. Bob is changing her life. So basically, you'll see Dr. Bob, he gives you bullshit, referendum, whatever, uh, prescription what you have, you know, Oh, you're by your list. Now they start shooting at her all at you. Oh, the other shit at you. So you're really not sober.
You're really not sober. You see now after I got clean I discovered I had a problem I discovered I was bipolar or Johnny Gubots or this or that or this now that medication they give you you know on top of the Opiate epidemic. How bad a fucking Adderall is so fucked up as Adderall We have someone every month that's on Adderall when they're doing the podcast and you can tell me it
Yes, they can't shut the fuck up. They're talking very fast pace. They're really excited. They've got like just a little bit too much energy. There's something about them that you just know. And you just, like, you could tell, like, you're like, whoa, whoa, slow down. Sometimes I'll offer them a drink. I mean, I've had people on the podcast where I tried to figure out what the fuck was going on. And then later on, in the podcast, they told me they did Adderall. And I was like, OK. All right, now I get it. Now I know where all this tension is going on. That's crazy. We knew that used to take two Adderalls and fucking the chicken West Palm or something used to drink.
Oh, dude, everybody does. Do you know how many people do it? No. I'm getting stunned. All my, like, the families that I know, like with my kids or friends with their kids, and I get to know these people, fucking, all these, like, successful suburban people are doing Adderall all the time. That's how they get through work.
That's how they become successful. They're always hustling. They're always getting things done. And these motherfuckers, they always want the newest shit. They want the newest watch. Oh, is that the newest Hubull? Is that the newest this? Is that the newest dad? Oh, he's got the Mercedes AMG. Oh, look, he's got this. And she's there. She bought a house in the Oaks. Oh, you know, look at this. And she's got a that. And look at that person. Where'd you get that? I heard that's a Hermes. Oh, you can't get those. All they're doing is like,
chasing after these things so they can go places and other people will look at this new thing that they have it's very strange it's like there's one thing like if you know someone who like collects a certain thing like they're you know so we're really into fucking whatever it is old samurai swords or something like that they love the history of it that's not what these people are doing they're buying things so they could bring places and other people would go oh so they get a feeling like a feeling of
I guess a successful feeling. You know, they get a feeling from other people recognizing that they have the latest thing. Like, oh, where'd you get that jacket? Oh, look at that purse. Oh, look at that. Look at that chain. How many carats is that ring? Let me see your ring. Oh, girlfriend, let me see your ring. Amazing. It's so cute. Those shoes are so cute. Oh, my God, so cute. And they're just like, weird fucking just...
Pilled up people, weirdo, speed it up, people that are chasing after the next object. It's a very, it's a very strange, and they don't talk about shit. I get together with these people, you know, because we'll have dinners together, or our families will get together, the kids will play, we'll go to a party together, and, you know, a good 20% of these people do not talk about shit. All they talk about is objects.
They talk about this object and that object and how much this is worth and how much real estate's going for here and that's the whole focus of conversation. It's like an anti-human conversation because they're not talking about anything human. They're not talking about the community, what they love about life and their experiences as a parent and none of that, man. A lot of them don't even pay attention to their kids. They go
and drink and leave the kids outside. And the kids are just fucking hitting other kids with sticks and shit and going nutty. And then when they come out, oh, no, my kid's a good kid. He doesn't do that. And then go back inside and drink more. And it's like crazy. It's really interesting to see. It's like the things that fuel success in a lot of people are in a lot of these folks. It's like this need for material possessions and then pills. And this is what's going on.
You didn't come, you and I didn't come from the best home conditions available to us. You didn't have the fucking Brady bunch in your house. I'm not insulting you. I'm just saying that you had to deliver papers and your mother had to work and Lou and the whole fucking thing. You ever sit there sometimes at one of these fucking parties with these people who have everything? Everything we didn't have. And you're like, my parents were 20 times better than these fucking people as a parent.
Yeah. Like I'm sitting there every day now, and I'm a parent. I go to pools, I go to gymnastics, and I got a fucking recital. I mean, I have to do this. It's the who to fuck apart, and I am. But I see these people that do this shit, and I'm like, my mother was a fucking bookie.
I'm not on the bar and she was a drunk. And she was way better than these fucking guys. Because she was there. Is that what it is? Is that what it is? I think what we're talking about with this pill thing, there's a lot of people that are on antidepressants. There's a lot of people that are on Adderall. There's a lot of people that are on Xanax. There's a lot of people that are on a lot of weird disassociatives. And these disassociative pills, you see it in how they interact with their children.
They just zone out. They're not there. Even if you're stressed out about your kid, and you're interacting with your kid, at least the kid knows you're communicating with them. The kid's probably not happy that you're stressed out, but at least you're there. When you're zoned out on pills and staring at the fucking clouds,
It's just, it's just not, it's not a good way for human beings to interact with each other. Well, you're hopped up on some weird shit. And I think, I mean, I don't know what the actual numbers are, but in the communities that I associate with, I would say a good solid half of these fucking people are peeled up.
a good solid half. They're either peeled up on Xanax. What's really hilarious is I've talked to some of these people and they're like, I don't know how you smoke pot every day. I'm like, bitch, you take a Xanax every morning. Every morning you take a Xanax. I know a lady who takes a Xanax every time she gets in her car.
She's like, this is too much traffic. Pops of Xanax. For traffic, they pop of Xanax to go to sleep. They pop of Xanax because they have to fly. Oh, I have to fly. I need a Xanax. I need an edible. Yeah. For those flyable flights, I just can't sit there no more. Well, those animals make you think about the universe.
I mean, people say, oh, that's an excuse. And I'm not trying to be a hypocrite here. It's a different thing. It's a different thing, though. When I have mercy in the morning, I don't fucking get high. Like, I don't get high. Like, I have her in the morning before school, and I drive her. I try to, because I got to walk into school, so I want to reek like it. They already warned me one time. They warned me to smell like grief. I went to pick her up, and one of the teachers came home. She goes, well, last Friday, you were kicking.
You were pudging last Friday, so I can't embarrass my daughter, so I tracked her. That was it. That was it once they said it. That's funny. Then the afternoons, you know, I take my chances. I get high, go to the gymnast class or the swimming or the ballet or whatever the fuck we have to do. And then after that, you know, I'm out with my friends or doing the podcast or doing comedy. So, but Adderall, I don't have beer in my house, Joe. You don't really drink. I don't want alcohol in my house. I don't want alcohol in my house.
Now that I have a child known, I want alcohol in my house. Well, I'll tell you what, if there's one thing that I could kick that, you know, like this sober October shit, like if I could, uh, if I had to choose, like for the rest of my life, no booze or no pot, I would say no booze in a heartbeat. Yeah, but I like a cold, high-income, I do too. Cold, cold, high-income. I do, I do, I do too. But I get something out of pot.
I get like sensitivity. I get community. I get compassion. I get introspective thinking. I start, I examine myself more. I become more humble. I get something out of it. I get like real benefits out of pot. Like a lot of the benefits of benefits that some people would call paranoia or you know that people they freak out because you know they think the walls are closing in. I love that. It's good for you. I love that. I live in that world. I fucking love it.
I love somebody telling me I'm a loser, get it together. You haven't done dick today, get out of fucking you watch TV.
Uh, I'll tell you what I'm proud of. I'm very proud of Bert Kreischer. For cooking the booze this month? And listen, this will keep me going. I hope he stays off of it. Well, at least... What do you think a rehab is? You put these guys on rehab this month. Pretty much, right? What do you think a rehab is? A rehab is just to let you know where you stand. Sixty days, if you're not doing a certain something, makes you know where you stand.
And sometimes you go, you know what, Joe Relian? I'm not going to smoke pot, but I'm going to have my drink twice a week. That's cool too. You know, Bert has a prom flying, you know, he likes to fucking get twisted, you know. But Bert's what you call a social drink. Yeah, some fucking Florida.
You know, they wake up, they have the little fucking cocktail, whatever, they take a nap, they go to the beach. You and I don't know that life. I've never lived that life of drinking all day and then taking a nap. Burt's a real soldier, you know. Burt's not fucking around. Burt's not an amateur show. Burt's the real deal. I saw him running a couple days. I'd say I saw him running through my car at him when he was running at me and his shit with his little thing. I just took the car and just started going at him. And he's like, and also he looked at me and was like,
Because he's in my neighborhood. So I watched him a lot. I went over there. I tried to get him high. He wouldn't fault. So I'm worried. He was going to bring drug tests the other day. When I was on number 13, I think, and they were on number 14. And Ari was going to stop at CVS and pick up those marijuana tests.
He just didn't have the time. No, I'm very proud of Bert. And all this is going to let you do, look, even you with the reefer now, it's going to let you know that he didn't have to smell. It's like when I went to prison, the hardest thing about prison wasn't going to prison, you know. It was, how am I going to live without my marijuana? Really? How am I going to fucking sleep? I wasn't worried about nothing else in prison except marijuana. Did you get any in prison? No, you could. Fifty bucks for two joints out of a brown weed. I wasn't doing that.
But after the first week, you learn about yourself. You learn that you could go with that, which is one of the strongest things that could happen to somebody. It's like when you're in love with that girl, and you're destroying your life, you quit your job, and you drink, and you act like an asshole. And then she goes away to her wife for two weeks. After 10 days, you're like, fuck that bitch.
When you think people get divorced, when their wives leave for 10 days, their wife goes back to see the mother and you're sitting there going, why am I doing them? Why am I doing them? I'm much happier in this house. I can put her in the back somewhere and not say, you know, that's what happens. When you realize you could do it out, that's one of the biggest things in your world that could happen to you.
You have no idea. Well, you don't think you can do without in the beginning because you think maybe you could possibly get her back. If you can get her back, everything's going to go... You got this bad feeling because she's thinking about leaving and you're like, oh no. She's going to leave me. Maybe I could talk her back in. Maybe I could buy her something. Maybe I could do something. Maybe I could change my ways. And I'll bring her back. And I'll bring her back and everything's going to be fine. But everything is fine. And if she leaves, you'll just meet somebody else. That's it. Just come on. Relax. It's like when I gave up sodas, I never thought I could give up a coke.
Are you fucking crazy? Do you like those Zevias? Do you like those things? What's Zevia? Jamie, go get them some. What's a Zevia? Zevia. It's a... They're sodas that are flavored with stevia. People think I'm doing a fucking commercial for these things. They haven't paid me a nickel. I'm not taking any of their money. They're soda, but they're flavored with stevia.
and you don't know sugar at all they have like um... raspberries they have um... root beers they have like one that's like a seven-up they have one that's like a grapefruit soda they have a bunch of different ones man they're fucking great i love them i'm soaked on water now i don't give a water is great too i don't give a fuck anymore i drink a shit out of these stupid things though i do have a cola one right yeah give him that cream soda that one's a shit that right there and i call uh... uh... die coke sucks
About a month ago I was on a plane and I was a little, you know, loopy and I just said let me try a Coke. Let me have a Coke. I couldn't even finish the little fucking eight ounce glass. It was too sweet. Oh, I had some other day accidentally. It was a late night drive-through, a starving coming home from the store and I got a burger and I asked for a Diet Coke and they gave me a regular Coke and I went, oh, this is so good.
It was so delicious. Yeah, once a month, I'm gonna give myself a Coke or actual Coca-Cola once a month. Once you and I get the Mexican ones with the room. Yeah, the Mexico like a taco joint. Yeah, cactus got a cactus on where you guys usually go right there. They fucking good. But once you realize like, you know, we got to I grew up in Jersey. I got the sandwich. I got a bag of chips.
It's not the sandwich that kills. It's a bag of chips. If I have a turkey with Swiss and avocado, I'm not gonna fucking die. It's the fucking 22 ounce bag of chips. All those things, once you give them up, like I had to give them up with weight watches, they were tough. Potatoes were breakfast. That was tough? That was tough. That fills you up. For me, when switching over to like in and out and getting a double double with the lettuce,
with lettuce wrapping on the top of it. It's called protein style. That's the way to go. Because you still enjoy the shit out of it. It tastes amazing, but you're not getting all that bread. It's still fantastic. And it's really not bad for you. I mean, it's just ground beef, cheese, lettuce. It's not, I mean, there's nothing terrible for you there.
I just think that when you spend too much time eating shitty food, your body is going to just feel terrible. But if you can just limit that shitty food to occasionally, then you'll appreciate and enjoy just for fun. Have a meatball sub. Yeah, every now and then.
You know what, Cavarettas? You ever go to Cavarettas? Yeah. Yeah. That fucking place is so good. I get a sausage and pepper sub there every now and then. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. It was real Italian bread. I mean, it's a fucking thick outer crust Italian bread where you clamp it down and it's hard on the outside, but soft on the inside and you bite into that and you feel that real juicy Italian sausage and that marinara sauce. I got two weeks. I got two weeks. Two weeks. I go home in two weeks.
Oh, you're going home to it. Yeah, I save everything for when I go home. I don't fuck around no more. I don't eat Chinese food out here no more. I don't do none of that shit. You don't fuck around? No more. What about pizza? Do you fuck around pizza? Why? Why? I gotta stop the saying. I gotta place it on my house. I gotta taste them. If I walk in there with you, you'll drive down. Really? Yeah, it's that good? It's that good? Don't take the pie to go. No? You gotta eat it there? You gotta eat it there. You gotta eat it crazy. Just slice. You gotta get the slices that are rotating. You bring that pie home. It's like a fucking falafel.
Like you got to bring it home and put it in your oven all over again. That's the secret. You have to put it in your oven all over again. You know what no one does right here? White pizza.
No, because nobody's Catholic. There was a fucking, there's a pizza place in White Plains, New York down the street from executive billiards. I think it was Nicky's, Nicky's pizzeria. And they had this fucking white cheese slice, this white pizza slice with, and it had like, you could see the olive oil and butter and the pizza and the garlic, and you would bite into it and you'd be like, holy Christ. And the crust of the pizza underneath is just like, just the right amount of cooked,
where there was like a little bit of a slight burn to the crust, and you're biting into it, and you're just feeling the cheese and the dough and all the sauces and the... Whoa! Oh, what's in fucking Durin' Lent? When you grow up back then, you go to your friend's house on Friday, and they get like, muscles and red sauce. And white stuff. Nikki, that's the place. And white fucking pizza. We'd walk to that place, right from Executive Billions, right down the street. Fucking phenomenal place. Saw a good street fight there once.
And that's what, and here's the other thing that bothers me the most. You know what a slice is? Do you know what a fucking slice is? Yeah. Here's a move. A slice is a thing of a move, okay? What's a slice of a move? A slice of a move is you mean you're on the fucking move. When I come in to see Joe's pizza and I go, oh, let me get two cheese to go. And you give him to me the thing and I fold them up. I eat one there. Can you take one with me? And one to go. Go get a slice in Hollywood somewhere. What happens?
They take it, they write a receipt, they hang it up, and some other guy comes, takes the slice up, puts it in. You have to wait for 10 minutes, then they come with a number and they give you the fucking slice. Listen, do it all one shot. Use your dirty hands. They ain't gonna kill me.
And they're gonna kill me. I don't give a fuck if you scratch jazz. Throw the fuck the heat from the oven or kill the germs. You know what I'm saying? Just throw the slice in. Everything's a process. A slice, that's the whole thing of a slice. Well everything's corporate. Yeah, it's a move. I don't like that shit. I know what you mean. Everything has become corporate.
And these places that you're never going to get that old small restaurant feel from a place like this that you'll get from a place like Nikki's pizzeria, you know? You know, the flavors are different. We've talked about this before. I don't know what it is and I've heard people say it's the water, but whatever it is. The place down the block from Gotham.
That's what I can do, God. I'll show you the slice right here. I even took a picture. They got a fucking, they got a sausage trombone in there. Gotta make your ass all fall out in this thing. I just took a bite of it. I won't need a whole strumboli. That's a heart attack at night. That's a delicious meal. What a strumboli? That's a heart attack. That's a, you know what? It's got a good trombone here. Vegas. Vegas? I heard there's a place in Vegas that you got a strumboli and they put, they have couches in the back.
Well, they must have left over, if we take a nap. Yes, you can take a nap. They must have left over guineas from when the mob ran Vegas, right? You used to go to a place that, uh, epily used to take you to the Italian pool place that you said that place went under, unfortunately. Did it? Yeah, it did. That place was fantastic. That was some of the best Italian food in Vegas and you would get it at a pool hall. It was so weird. Okay. Beautiful. That slices. It looks good. Look at the fucking sauces from Bali, my niece got
That's like a florist. Yeah, this is a beautiful flowers. Oh, no, no. This is Dosa Manos Cuban restaurant. They've been serving Cuban stinks sandwiches since 1960. Wow. That's all they do. That's all they do. Can you mistake sandwiches in a place? West New York, New Jersey. Wow. That's the place. You took pictures of pizza. Bro, that's beauty. That's Mona Lisa in my world.
Look at the Stromboli. Look at the fucking Stromboli. Look at the counter. His phone is filled with pictures of his food. Look at his lots of tales. Lots of tales. The one from Jersey with the cream in them. Oh, nice. This place here. You can't all those Italian fucking cookie. Look at that. Look at that fucking. Look at that. What is that? What do you call those? Cannolis, right? Yeah. Look at that fucking cannoli. Oh my God.
I'll take pictures of my kids. I'll take pictures of food. Fuck the kid. Give me pictures of food. It's all food. No, every time I go to New York, I just take pictures so I can show people here what they're missing. Like, this is what I know.
this, uh, doing this yoga thing where I did nine, 10 yoga classes in a row, whatever it was. I think it was 10. You, you're, I'm hungry all the time. Cause I'm doing 90 minutes of yoga every day, every single day, not a day off for nine days or whatever it was. Let's say it was nine, but even if it was nine,
I took a day off before that, and I did two days in a row. So, it's like over the last couple of days, or the last couple of weeks, it was 11 classes, and mostly in a row. And just always hungry, just constantly hungry. Like your body's just craving it. And so I've been eating all sorts of shit that I never allowed myself to eat. Like late night, like grabbing a burger, and then like I had Wendy's burger last night coming home from the store. Not good for you, but felt good.
Will you burn right through that? I do work out a lot, but still not the smartest thing to do. I feel so much better when I don't do that. When I just limit myself to that once a week, I feel so much better. But I don't necessarily think it's good to do anything nine days in a row. I just feel like your body's just like, I've got a weird hamstring pull that's going on right now. Everything feels like a little worn out. You didn't run this month?
I didn't run, but one day the first week of the month. I'd lifted weights a couple times here and there, but almost the entire month has been yoga.
So far, I went to a jujitsu's. Eight. You know, when I go on the road, I do a metrical in the weights, and then I do this little fucking kettlebell crawl, little steel back, my backyard, just to get that hip thing going. So I laid this little thing. Is that Alberto Galazzi stuff? No, I'd decide, like, somebody told me to crawl, and I started crawling like you're in the army, like you're in the backyard, and I started crawling. I fucking love it. Just crawl around your yard? Yeah, just crawl around, pull yourself on your hips and shit, do all this shit. Pulling your elbows.
I like it, so I've been doing that. Well, when the gyms install, the gyms going to be installed here in two weeks, you got to come by and we'll do a workout. No, I want you to teach me the darce and all that stuff, the half guard and all that stuff. That'll be great. Sure. That's great that you got this place. This is a fucking big place. Crazy place.
Right, but it's this place. We're gonna do all kinds of stuff here We're gonna have it set up where people could follow along workouts I'm gonna get someone to to like guide us through a workout and like I'll say hey everybody grab a 35 pound kettlebell We're gonna go through this like that Keith Weber guy that I've had on before Keith Weber I'll get him to come up here and teach that extreme kettlebell extreme cardio workout It's a fucking phenomenal workout that you can do with 135 pound kettlebell and you'll pick up a 35 pound kettlebell you're like what a fucking workout I'm gonna get with this little boat weight that does it
Five minutes in, you'll be dying. Guaranteed, 100%. Even if you're in good shape, it's hard. If you're not used to that workout, it is fucking hard. And by the time the thing's over, my legs are on fire. Just 35 pounds? 35 pounds. And what kind of shit are you doing? Oh, clean presses over and over again, hot potatoes back and forth, renegade rows. You're doing like one push up with one hand on the kettlebell, switch to the other side, push up with the other one.
doing them passing in between your legs, and you're going one after the other, one after the other, windmills, over and over, clean press, nashes, and you're doing these in succession over and over again. Switch to the other side, switch to the other side, 10 on this side, 10 on that side, you know, and it's, we're talking about like a 45 minute workout. We have them, you can, you could buy them all over the place, but we have them on it.
He's got three of them out, three different workouts. They're fucking crazy DVDs. I mean, this guy is, he's a trainer up in Canada. He's just in tremendous shape, but the videos are so good. Because it's one of the few videos where a lot of these kettlebell workout videos, like people are teaching you proper form, which is all important. You know, it's real important to like learn proper form, learn where to keep the weight balanced, keep your weight and your heels and keep your feet flat on the ground, all the different things that they want you to stress about various individual movements.
But Keith Weber's like you better know all that shit cuz we're just gonna take you through a radical workout like ready Here we go boom and he does he's doing it all with you. He's doing it on the beach. It's awesome crazy shit. Yeah, the guy's good, too From Alberto. He's good, too. He's got a nice little work on the morning. Oh, yeah, that's kettled jitsu guys that guy's yeah
5.30 a.m. I watch it online. 5.30. 5.30 a.m. He's got like fucking a stack of people in there. And they go right to jujitsu at 6.30. How great will it be to show up? I gotta get up at 3 a.m. Yeah, that's hard. To be ready at 5.30 for that type of shit. Have coffee. I gotta have coffee, smoke pot, have a protein shake, ride a little bit, just so not to think. Get your brain fired up. Yeah, I can't. I have a heart attack. I just can't get up and go over that.
The good thing about doing a workout like that before Jiu Jitsu is that you'll approach Jiu Jitsu like light. Is this him Kettle Jitsu? Yeah, he's got a good program. Like he's doing hip escapes. He's calling it snake moves while he's holding onto a kettlebell at the same time. That's phenomenal for your core. He's a rocking chair get ups. You know what I really like, man? I do these sit ups with kettlebells where I put a 255 pound kettlebells.
or 50 pound kettlebells over my feet, I put my feet through the handles, and then I put two in my hands, and I lay back on my back, and I press them up, and then I sit up with them pressed up, and I do my sit ups that way, and it just makes your core, your ab muscles just so goddamn strong. I get the 25, you give me, I don't tie my feet, and what I do is I go back, and then when I go this way, I do like a fucking burpee to get my legs going. Oh, that's great. That went too rough on my back, but I do that
That's fun. And then stand back up all the way up? No. No. I just, boom, boom, and then go back and then boom, boom, at least. It's like I'm getting onto a table. That's what we're going to get into a table. I wanted a strength and all that shit, and it helped me strengthen my back doing all that stuff. Those are great workouts because they're not, it's not like a glamorous thing where it pumps you up, it gives you a big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big
Oh, yeah? So to warm up, I open up with the bag. Very lonely, five minutes close distance, then spread out, punches, blah, blah, blah. Just get everything moving. Then push up, stretch. Once you do 20 minutes, then I start doing my stretches to really get the muscle warm. Then I go back, now I start throwing kicks. That kills Uncle Joey.
Once I start throwing the kicks, kicks, kicks, kicks, then I crawl, then I do my cleans. I do all the Abrodo Galazzi stuff with a 15-pounder now. Instead of using the kettlebells for swings, they were in the middle of my back. I use two 15s. I turn my arms and I go up, boom. Oh, so you're raising the clubs? Yeah, I got them from on it, man. They hooked me up. Oh, that's great. So they're fucking great. Do you ever do Turkish get-ups?
I do up to a degree, so I take the 10, whatever it is, boom, boom, boom, and then I do like a table instead of getting all the way up. Oh, that's good. Yeah, no, no, no, but I got parts with my knees. It's all, yeah, no, no, I do it, I like all that stuff.
Any of that stuff, like when you're lying down on your back, and you're pressing something up, and even just getting up to your knee, it's all just about strengthening your core. Do you do anything for your legs? Do you do bodyweight squats for your legs? Squats, the goblets? You don't have to do it with weight even. Okay, I do it. I start with nothing, and then I work myself up to a 35 goblet.
Oh. And then I do. You know what, man? My knees are kind of... Yeah, you've always had some knee issues, right? The left one. The right one now is a little funky, so I stop with the swings. I love cleans with kettlebells. That's my shit. So I like the combination clean, put my hand out and squat. Oh, those are great. And then I do another clean squat. I do five on each side. Now, does anybody run you through a program or do you just come up with this on your own?
Whoever I've worked with I'll say take the best of what they got and then just decide to do whatever you want Yeah, Alberto is there my wife got me a bag for Christmas
I got two calibals from you. Do you want to join us if we do some sort of a challenge, some next level challenge, some next thing? You want to join in? Which do you like? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I'm just thinking. This is one of the things that I've realized from this doing the 15 yoga classes. I would fucking never do nine yoga classes in a row like that. I would never do nine days in a row unless I said I was going to do it.
But once you say you're going to do something and you do it, it's not that hard. You just wind up doing it. You have to do it. My alarm goes off at seven. I'm out the door. I get to the class. I do the fucking 90 minute class. And then I'm done. And then I go do my shit. And then I know the next day, it doesn't matter if I get home from the store at one o'clock in the morning. My alarm's going off at seven. I'm getting up. I'm having a cup of coffee. I go there fasted. I just have coffee. You work out early? Yeah. So I won't like getting up and working out.
I'm good about 11 to 12 I have 11 o'clock podcast a lot of times like today's 11 o'clock podcast So I'm up, you know, I already got a 90-minute workout in I come here You know stop it like a whole foods or something like that get a coconut milk
Eat something good. I got the coconut milk now and I mix it with the acai vanilla. Jesus Christ, it's delicious. A couple of ice cubes. Yeah, I never liked the acai vanilla, but they run out of the chocolate. Yeah, they start to send it to me and I'm like, beggars can't be choosy. Good googly boogly. It's very good. It's very good. You know, then the good thing about that hemp-force protein is it's very little sugar. That's why I use the water. Two scoops, water ice. A couple grams of sugar per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per per
No, I like it. I like that one. I don't mind doing a challenge. Here's the problem Joe Rogan. Here's the problem What happens that a lot of people don't realize I got the jiu-jitsu, right? Let's say I go to Alberto's, right? Alberto's has some fucking killers in there
So I'll do the break the guard, pass the guard, right? A couple of those, and then we start rolling. Well, a guy like me, an older guy, starts rolling, and after the second five minute roll, he's opened up. He's, oh, I'm open. Like I called Dolce on my Dolce. What's my problem, bro? How come I'm not breathing? He goes, you know how many guys go into the octagon? And I got to work them out in the back for 45 minutes before, because they can't breathe either. It's just, just go with it. So if I do more than those two roles, it's the law of diminishing returns.
I really can't walk the next day. It's hard. But you got to build up to it. You got to build up to it. So that's why I like this other guy in a way. Because you work one day you drill, one day you work. I could do a weight shit. Like I like weight shit. I was thinking of joining your buddy's gym for a really good workout, Terry Norris. Terry? If that's the one in Studio City. Terry Norris and Terry Claymon.
There's a Terry Clay Bond is the guy I used to train with who's in Hollywood. No, Terry Norris is the former boxer. Yeah, he's but he's in he's in he's in Burbank. Is he really? Fuck yeah, he has a group on for like 30 visits for 22 hours like teaching people out of box. Yeah, Terry Norris was a mother fucker little corner store. It's up the corner from
It's up the corner from a famous bodybuilding gem, but it's right there, up the corner from, there's a fucking great restaurant, that breakfast restaurant, and he's right there. How is he like talking and everything, is he alright? Because they had a thing on him on television, he's having some issues. I think his wife is there, and he has somebody else there, but he's there cause.
Yeah, she said that it's interesting because like he's got all these issues, but then once he starts hitting the bat, he comes back and he looks like Terry Norris of old. He's just talking and struggling. You know, he just I remember seeing him once. I was at a boxing match. I was actually with Dom Ira and Terry Norris, they're talking to people and this is before he had had retired like officially. And he was talking to somebody and you could hear the slur and I was like, whoa, like I had no idea. No idea. It was this bad.
You know, all those guys, those guys that are in wars, you will run into them one day and you will see it all. You'll see the war in their voice. You'll see it in the slurring and the weird ticks and the movements and you're like, oh, you're looking at a frazzled person. They're shattered.
Did Jamie show you the hit from last night? The what? Can you watch the hit from football last night? Oh, no. What happened? Somebody get smashed? We're rough. Yeah. But you know what's crazy? This was football thing years ago. Now they're fucking done like... Did I hit this hard anymore? No, you can't.
Well, how'd this guy get hit so hard? Watch this. Yeah, so the main issue on it is like it's a quarterback play. They do the thing where they, I guess they're called, it's giving up their body. They slide with their legs first. They're not supposed to get hit like in almost anywhere. Maybe you're supposed to tap them just to like let them know they're down. So this guy gives up his legs. Let me see if I can find the video too.
I'm trying to tell while I'm talking, but he gets hit really, really hard. And then when you see it in slow-mo, it kind of makes a little worse. Because the dude lead with his arm hits him right in the helmet. Oh, he goes like this, Joe. Oh, you see him. You're like, damn. I'm surprised they didn't throw him out. Like, I didn't watch the game. When I got up this morning, it was all over the place. And laid it, laid it. I wonder if one day they're going to be able to figure, is this it right here? Yeah. Here he goes. Running. Oh, Jesus.
Well, why is that guy mad? Because it's a lead hit. They got furious at him. Let me see it again. They'll see. We'll go to show from other angles and you'll see. Protecting quarterbacks is a big deal. That's the guy that hit him. 47. Kiki Alonzo, I think it's his name. Kiko. That's the guy who got hit. Joe Flacco for the Raven. All right, here we go. He's running. He's running. This is the angle that's a little rougher.
But he was already coming. How's he going to stop? That's the point. That's the point. That's the point. That's the point. Let's see, that's the point. You're supposed to stop. It's like kicking a fighter when their arms are down kind of thing. It's a rough time. I know that they changed the rule recently, but sort of the same kind of thing. So he hit that dude even though the dude was already down. The guy went down on his own accord.
Him sliding feet first means he's not supposed to be hitting him like that. He should know better. It's what thought. That's why everyone was mad. That's why his coach is yelling at him. So he just took a cheap shot at him. Yeah, exactly. And he hit him really hard, knocked him right out of the game. So what happens to that guy? 47? He gets a fine. Yeah, that dude. He gets to spend it for three or four games. He got his bell wrong. Yeah, that's a fucked up thing, right?
In college football, they're taking them out of the game right away. He would have been probably thrown directly out of the game, potentially missed more, maybe half the next game. So they give a penalty to the other team? Yeah, so in NFL right now, it's just a penalty. How many of these football referees are on the take?
How many of these guys get busted? That's a big thing about NBA players. I was reading this whole thing about how little NBA players make, and how they're constantly watching all these NBA, or not NBA players, NBA referees make, and how they're watching all these players pull up in Bentley's and Rolls Royces, and shining with diamonds and gold and jewelry, and that these guys just start taking bribes, and that there is at one point in time where there's just a shit load of referees in the NFL and the NBA that are just on the take.
Really? Yeah. And they'll get bribed by bookies, they'll get bribed by people that are big-time gamblers. And you've got to think, if this guy's only making, how much does a referee make? So some here between, anywhere between 150 and 500,000. Oh yeah, they make money. That's a good living. They make money. But if someone comes to you, if you make 150 and someone comes to you, he goes, Joey, I just want you to make this game a little bit more easy for the Dolphins. Here's 100.
Here's how much they make per year and some players that make that per game. Now pull up bribery in NBA referees or corruption in NBA referees. There's been a bunch of guys that have been busted, right?
I don't know about a bunch. I think it's really just the one guy. Just one? He tried to call out a bunch of other people, but he didn't do it by name. Who? Donny. Yeah, I talked to him that guy. Did you? He's on my podcast. No shit. What'd he say? He's at the General Gammon. Good guy. He's just a fucking... Listen, you've fallen to that trap, man.
Right they have so many scams like he was telling me they got like the first-class ticket shit Mm-hmm, you know when they give you your first class ticket to travel to the games. It's just so much just a little bit of this a little bit of that You know well, there's always a lot of that with boxing as well, you know
And college basketball just, uh, this is a huge, uh, this is tremendous coaches and some different programs. And I think it was Adidas might have been. So they were playing families were getting paid through the shoe companies to direct players to certain schools. Oh, and then they were getting signed by those companies when they made it to the NBA. And in some cases, I think Rick Petino, who's the coach for Louisville is taking something like 98% or 95% of the money that was due to the school from Adidas.
He was just keeping it all. What? Yeah. What? No. Yeah. Is that legal?
Yeah, I don't know. Legal's a weird word on that. I mean, it's in the contract and it was like cash and how it's all getting dispersed. So Adidas is paying him. Basically, yes. And if you go back to the movie, Blue Chips, which came out a long time ago, it's all being, it was like fictional then, but it's been going on for the last 25 years. So why would they pay him? Like, what are they, what are they, if Adidas wants to, like, what does Adidas get out of it? He's bringing in the most popular players that are going to be like most popular recruits from high school and AAU.
And so that maybe he could bring them to Adidas and then Adidas who have all over the final four the NCAA tournament. They're going to be on Saturday basketball. They're getting advertised just like NBA players, but they're not getting the money. They're getting names. That's crazy. You know, they're all over Sports Center.
So they essentially would, Adidas would pay him to be an influencer. 100%. Yeah. Wow. That's weird. That's a weird role. So he would be the father figure or the coach figure to these young men. They look up to him. He's a mentor in some ways. And he weasels them into the Adidas fold. And they would, they're also one, they want that. They want to wear Adidas cloth stuff.
Yeah, they want that the cool jerseys they're making Ohio State right now the team I'm paying pay attention to for football have some awesome crazy jerseys that nobody's ever gonna get that like the LeBron James Brand of Nike is giving them that are gonna be showcased all over TV Saturday. I was reading about Under Armour is banking on Steph Curry's new Under Armour shoe. Good luck. Oh, wow Jamie so so much
They were saying that Steph Curry, who's like one of the best players in the league apparently, you know that more than I do. I don't know shit about basketball. They were saying that his new Under Armour shoe, they're putting a lot of money into this idea that his shoe is going to rebound the stock. So people are making recommendations to buy Under Armour stock now so that when the shoe comes out, everybody gets crazy and buys his shoe and then Under Armour will bounce back.
You know the problem is, once something has a stink about it, it's kind of it, you know? Is that bad looking? In my opinion, and from knowing what I know about sneakers, that's not the shoe that's going to bring them back.
What's wrong with that shoe? Unless a bunch of kids are into it, which I don't know that they would be. It's more about marketing. So you have to get a whole bunch of kids into buying that. And then there's got to be a couple influencers in the NBA video game world and like the YouTube blogging world that are going to have to make this seem cool to them. What does it say? Does it say Steph Curry on it? Is that an SC? 30, his number. Oh, it looks like an SC, doesn't it?
I mean, I guess I wouldn't wear these shoes as all. It's so much fucking money in the sneaker business. You wouldn't wear those shoes. I mean, you wear those goofy looking Yeezys. I also like, I wouldn't wear these casually. I'm not playing basketball. Do you need a tissue? I'm good. So if some people might be wearing these for basketball, there are a lot of kids still playing basketball. If they can get a team into buying them, then you get 15 pairs sold right to a team.
You're talking about two totally different worlds, right? You're talking about there's people that buy shoes to where to play in casual or and then there's people that why buy shoes just to hang out in, correct? Yeah, but they're doing them. They're buying athletic shoes for hang out purposes and these the marketing of it is a real weird place because Jordans are where it all started. Michael Jordan got everybody wearing shoes, you know.
Yeah, and Jordan's people don't play basketball in Jordan's correct. Or a lot of people don't. They're doing it now. Because you look cool when you're wearing those fucking cool Jordan's, yeah. Oh, so if you wear Jordan's playing basketball like this guy's so fucking crazy, he's playing basketball in Jordan's. Or even, yeah, like he's playing basketball in the $1,000 retro Jordan's. Wait a minute, they cost $1,000? Some of them do. No.
Oh, wait. Yes. Really? I mean, brand new retail. They're costing about $100 to $200. They're not $100 retail, but the rarity of them, especially depending on the year they came out, if they came out five years ago, some of them cost $1,000, $2,000, not $2,000.
Really? When I get like a cheap ghee, they got the shoulder roll. What do you call those? The shoulder roll, yeah. People went online for those. Yeah? They even made a Michael Jordan one. They made a guy that don't do jujitsu. They put a ghee out of Michael Jordan ghee that they sold in Chicago. I know a guy that buys all those ghee's. Like they do the same thing. Like lucky. Limited time only. Midnight. And they have hundreds of ghee's. They do not wear them.
Really because the shoulder rolls to show you rolls. I don't know exactly what they came back. I don't fucking know
I like Datsusaras. Datsusaras got great stuff, yeah. Those are great. That gear is correct. You still wear it, you still wear the Datsusaras. The Datsusaras is nice. It's real durable too because the hemp is just so much more durable than cotton. It's just those things. I mean, geese are pretty goddamn durable as it is. It usually takes a long time for when it starts to break unless you have a single weave, you know, one of those thin, light ones in the summer. I love my food, you do. I love my food. Would you do it all the mats?
I got the white one, the black one, then you could pull them. I'm a gorilla in that thing. But they're like, this is why I knew I wouldn't do well in high yoga. First of all, I'm not a heat guy. You could tell I even humidity. I don't respond well to.
When I first started jujitsu, I was the biggest problem I had, that I didn't know anything about geez. So I went and bought a judo gi. When I hit that heat, that heat level went all the way up, that took me to a different place. Yeah, those double weave geez. Those are very heavy. But some people like that. They like the double weave. They like the feeling of security of having that very thick cloth around them.
Some people like that golden weave. I like the single weave the summer the food. Yeah, yeah, I wanted to feel light I don't want a fucking geek. You don't look at the size of me if I put a gear That's 20 pounds. Well also for me I have a staff a couple times So I always put a rash guard on anyway, even if I wear a geek I just don't just people get scratched from fingernails all the time and I also carry those defense soap I got the white spray
The soap I got the soap in the shower. Yeah, but I'm on my fucking feet when that's like do you drink kombucha? Yeah, that's so good again probiotics. Do you ever have kimchi every kimchi? No, that's what I said. You can't hear that shit smells fucking disgusting. I love that stuff even though I'm Asian. It says I'm Asian the fucking pain
I buy a fucking jar of that shit like a 32 ounce jar and I'll eat most of the jar. What is kimchi like a fucking cabbage? It's pickled cabbage. It's fermented cabbage from Korea and your farts smell worse than taste They'll clean the paint off your fucking car
I don't do the Greek yogurt either. I like the regular yogurt. Greek yogurt tastes like ass. I like regular fuck that. I tried the vanilla on the plane.
I don't like Greek yogurt. No, I like the Dan. I like all the other ones, you know? Well, over the last few months, I've been shying away from dairy. I've been, I'll eat a little cheese every now and then because I like cheese, but I've been trying to like eliminate dairy from my diet a little bit, just to see. Because I've heard from several people that they've eliminated dairy and they've had good reactions, their body, they've had like less inflammation and it makes them feel better. I'm that shit. They said it on that report. I'm lactose, whatever. Intolerant? Yeah.
I don't drink milk. I drink a milkshake once a month. If I'm out, I don't drink a milkshake. I make a banana shake at home or something like that. I like my shakes thin, so.
I think that's what I'm going to do for November. I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do for November, but I think for November, I'm going to go the entire month without eating any bullshit. A hundred percent. The entire month, just all straight, healthy food, no added sugar, no nothing, no sodas, no crap. I'm just going to see what that feels like. We're going to come up with some new challenge because after this month doing this, I feel like this was a very beneficial month for me.
beneficial in that first of all my back has never felt better like doing yoga all these times like it makes your back feel bulletproof like you just feel like my posture and everything like everything is just it feels so sturdy because
Yoga especially beak rooms like that 90-minute hot yoga shit so much of it is about your back and your core and like supporting your spine and I think you know sitting down a lot doing podcast even though these chairs are phenomenal these capisco ergo depot chairs these things are phenomenal they keep you you know sitting in the right posture and they support you well it's not real good to sit down all the time like that and a lot of times your back is like compressed and
If you don't have good structure and if you don't have good strength around the spine, like good muscle strength around the spine, you're going to develop all sorts of weird problems and weird issues with your back.
I think I've learned a lot in this month about what kind of exercises you need to do to keep your back strong. This yoga shit, doing it as many times as we did it this month. I'm not going to do it this many times, but I'm definitely going to do it two times a week from now on. Definitely.
You know, and if you mix it with the weights a little running you can go dog. Yeah, you're good to go You don't need much if you know we're not getting the Olympics, right? We're not fucking playing just trying to maintain just trying to maintain Keep your fucking whatever going. That's all it's not a lot. Have you ever done the cryotherapy?
The who? Crowd therapy. The cold shit. Yeah. I worked myself up. It's right down the corner from my house. Have you done it? No. I just always forget to go down. It's phenomenal. I think I had a lot of problems. You know, I wrote the fucking...
Whatever, the first four chapters for the book. For your book? Yeah, that's what I did August and September. What are you writing a book about? What got me into comedy? Why got into comedy? Just the biography. Yeah? I hate to see you. And I finally started August first. I got the iPod, whatever the iPad.
You write it on an iPad? Fuck yeah, and I write it and I hire the kid and he edits everything from me. Oh yeah? So I had to have four chapters done and I gotta tell you something. Do you have a book deal? No, I'm gonna try again. Yeah, I wanted to write it, bro. I wanted to write it. I didn't want to say every time I had somebody else write it. Joey Diaz is like a Floyd
Story. You see this in the last guy. A Floyd story? A Floyd story and whatever the fuck those people say. I have no fucking Tory in story. Who's Floyd? I had no fucking idea. You know these people. You know, you know, you know, writing has gone like when you read Silence of the Lambs, right? It's just plain writing. But sometimes you read these books or the writers go a little too far with that bullshit.
You know what I'm saying? It was a magnificent, whatever. It's just too much. It's like you were saying, you ever go to people's houses and they talk and then they say shift for 20 minutes? It's like by studio city where I live. Go to that coffee shop in time to time. You know what they were saying in there? That they after the Vegas shooter, the Vegas shooter was Sunday night. Do you know what these idiots were saying in there on Monday? But that this had to do with women's rights and the abortions. And they just talk. There's no breathing gentiles? They just talk.
That's all they do is talk with big words to impress you. But they don't say shit. They don't say shit. Three or four big words to let you know they're smart and then they didn't say nothing.
There's a lot of repeating narratives. Oh, yeah every time the show the new show I'm gonna do I'm buying one of those little tape recorders And I'm putting them under these six fucking morons every day then at night I'm gonna do a show about what they discussed because this is 60% of America with these fucking people talking about this is the idiots the shit that comes out of their mouth is Amazing and you sit there and go no wonder fucking
ISIS wants to shoot us. Listen to these fucking dummies. Listen to what's coming out of their mouth. Women's rights? That's what they're talking about.
Well, what was their argument? They were saying that the guy- Bro, they argued with this on everybody. They argued with this. Everybody is trying to be smart on everybody. It's just six people trying out with each other. It's like when you go to those fucking dinner parties you talk about. And by the time they serve the salad, you want to put a gun in your fucking pot. Why am I even fucking here with these people? I could have stopped at Burger King and had a better fucking time. That's why I don't go to those dinner parties because there's eight people talking. And once politics comes up, you lose me, Joe Rogan.
I don't want to hear about it no more. You lose me. You lose me. These new political people talking nonsense. You lose me. Move forward. Either impeach them, get a new one, or shut the fuck up. I can't, you don't put the news on anymore?
But it's definitely... First 20 minutes! He didn't send the check. He called her a... What the fuck, man? Who gives a fuck? Who gives a fuck? There's got to be something more... There's got to be a seal stuck on a beach somewhere in this fucking country. Something more important than this shit every fucking day. So the politics is over in my world. Religion... I don't want to... Yeah, it's supposed to talk about politics or religion and those fucking things. But this new breed of Gentile, they just talk.
for the sense of talking to see who's the smartest person in the room. And at the end of the day, they're all a bunch of dumb fucks anyway.
There's definitely a lot of people talking to just impress other people. Yeah, that's it. And there's a lot of people saying a bunch of things that they've read on blogs or read on websites. Everybody wants to have an intelligent conversation and everybody witty. Get the fuck out of here. Get the fuck out of here, man. Leave me the fuck alone. 2007. Would you rather them talk about?
It's life, something that makes sense, something simple, that you're not trying to impress me. Talk to me about your kids and what you want from your kids. But don't you think there's a lot more that Hollywood, because people are trying, I think one of the things about Hollywood is that people are always trying out for auditions. They're always going in on auditions. And they always have to be picked and chosen. And they're always trying to position themselves like someone that you would want to hire.
And so they manufacture these attitudes based on what they think. They lick their finger, they hold it up, they find out which way the wind's blowing, and that's the way they go. And they start to sort of construct their personality based on what they think
with all the casting agents all of them a hundred percent of them are liberal they're all liberal everyone's liberal everyone across the board is a democrat or the of the radical ones are very standard supporters and everyone has like very clear left wing views what you like it or not
not a judgment on it. But these people that go in for auditions and actors, which is most of what you're running into, either actors or screenwriters or someone who's trying to do something in Hollywood, they all want people to know that they're on the right team. And they all want to say,
all the things that they think need to be said. Where you saw a lot of the hypocrites was in the first few days of this Harvey Weinstein show. Oh, please. Yeah, please. Nobody wanted to say shit. And you know what, man? At the end of the week, they're all fucking disgust those because they all fucking knew about it. Oh, they all knew about it for years. And now they all want to raise their fucking head. But you know what, bro? When Harvey was giving them movies, nobody was complaining.
Yeah, well, I've heard that I was complaining. I heard that I was complaining from a girl. She was saying that Harvey Weinstein gave them all careers. I was like, wow, that's a crazy, crazy argument. The one, two of the chicks thanked them in the Oscars. Now you're gonna listen, leave me the fuck alone. The ones that really need to smack out the mouth of the guys that came out.
And said, I got molested once. I got my dick got touched on a party one time. We live for that shit. We live for somebody to touch our fucking dick. You know what I'm saying? We're not going to go to therapy. We don't say nothing. Somebody grabs your dick. You just fucking smile and go.
But everybody needs a break from time to time. You know what I'm saying? You never let a gay guy suck your dick with ice cubes in their mouth? No, it's a party. You know what I'm saying? I don't know. I don't know but I had a friend one time that he'd let anybody suck his dick. Anybody? Anybody want to suck his dick that suck his yum yum stick. Really? And one day he was telling me about fucking getting his dick sucked by a gay guy with ice cubes in his mouth. I nearly fucking died.
He just let the guy do it. Yeah, he goes fuck it was the conversation. He was telling me I was mouth was cold and all this shit and I was fucking dying. I couldn't believe it. Did you look at the guy while he was sucking his dick? I didn't ask him. Listen, I don't want to know about that shit. I would want to know. But you wanted to know about the guy getting his dick sucked by a dude with ice cubes in his mouth. I mean, why not? Well, he told me that he was watching it. Well, first of all, when he told me the story, I was young. I had never heard that story before. I was like 18. He goes, I let a fucking guy suck my dick.
one time but if it was so good why not keep going yeah it's tough to find somebody will suck your dick with ice cubes in the mouth unless you give them the small 50 I think once you put it out there you put that flag up
People come. That was the funniest thing when that crazy bitch from Superman, because she popped up like eight days later. Harvey took his dick out one time, and I told him, put that back in your pants. Crazy chick from Superman, which one? Yeah, what's that chick that's crazy? Oh, the one that was hiding in the bushes, when they found her, she had no teeth. That one? What the hell's her name? What's her name? Superman with Christopher Reeve, right? No, the other one. Was it Superman with Christopher Reeve? The early Superman, right? Yeah, it was the one with Dean Kane. Who was the crazy? Oh, Dean Kane. Who was the one in there?
Margot Kidder is crazy, right? Yeah. No, this was the other one. The other one. But you're talking about the one who was in Superman with Dean Kane, the TV show. Yeah, maybe. Was a really pretty girl's name. Terry Hatcher. Terry Hatcher. Is that her name? She's on the TV show. You got to talk in the mic, but she was on the TV show. She was in desperate housewives too, right? Yeah. No, it wasn't her.
I had an ex-girlfriend of mine get so mad when I was talking about how pretty she was. Missing Superman actress found frightened in the bushes. Yeah, that was a 96. Margot Kidder, yeah, she went crazy. 47 year old Canadian born actress, best known. You know what, that's the thing. Once you hit like late 40s and you're one of those actresses and they stopped calling you are already crazy and the pressure builds up. She'd cut off her own hair with a razor blade and attempt to alter her appearance. A Glendale police sergeant Rick Young said.
Oh boy, she's taken to all of you medical center for a 72 hour psychiatric evaluation. They could have spared 71 hours and 50 minutes by just bringing it to me. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that bitch is crazy. No, what happened here? Yeah, they were Cory filming though. I don't know. He apparently got arrested. Oh, that thing. Yeah, I just made a joke and people get mad.
be there they got mad but it wasn't them getting matters me getting mad at myself what was the job uh... he was wearing a really small jacket always doing this performance at like a minor league baseball game and he was doing like this michael jackson thing and the but the jacket was so small i goes is that a jacket he was wearing when he was getting diddled when he was a little kid okay
And I was like, why did I joke around that? I was just trying to make Greg laugh. I just, I said something that I was, and then afterwards when I saw it, especially out of context, I was very disappointed in myself. He wants 10 million? The fucking exposed pedophilia? I saw that. He's out of his mind. I think, um, I don't think he, first of all, he never said that Michael Jackson did anything to him. He was, he said Michael Jackson didn't, but he said that there's a lot of pedophilia in Hollywood and he wants to make some sort of a movie on it.
Which I'm sure there's a lot of pedophilia in Hollywood. But like this idea that people are trying to kill him. He was saying people are trying to run him over. And isn't that what he was saying? Yeah, I watched the video for like 10 seconds. I felt bad. If they wanted to kill him, he'd be dead. Yeah, two trucks tried to hit him.
That's not real. See, this is like weird paranoia shit. Let me tell you something. If they want to kill you, you're dead. And it's not going to be trucks trying to run you over. It's going to be a guy out of nowhere, shoots you in the head and gets in his car and no one's going to know who he is and no one's going to catch him because they're going to hire a professional. Like this idea that someone's going to like miss him with a car and then they're chasing and running him down.
I find that very hard. I mean, it's possible, but I find it very hard, I believe. I always think that, like, if someone is a very powerful man, like, I don't know if the Clintons ever whacked anybody, but if they did, they whacked those fucking people. Like that one guy that was the big conspiracy theory about the guy who released all the stuff to WikiLeaks, the DNC guy, Seth Rich, yeah.
They killed that motherfucker. Whoever did it, whether he was killed because some random person decided to shoot him in the back in the middle of the night and not steal his watch or his phone or his wallet, whether it's that or whether it's what Julian Assange from WikiLeaks said is that there's consequences to leaking information to WikiLeaks because that's what they were saying. And people were saying, look, this is another one of the Clinton body count people.
You know, giant conspiracy theories about how many people the Clintons have had killed. I don't know if that's true or not. I have zero information. But I do know when people want you dead, you're dead. When they're real people, like that are real killers and evil fucks.
There's a lot of people that have been killed, like Putin. If Putin wants you dead, you get shot on TV in front of everybody and nothing happens. No one goes to jail, no one gets caught, you're just dead. That's the type of people we're talking about. So this, you know, I just, I have a hard time believing that like someone's getting like barely missed by a car. That's like some movie shit. Like they were coming after me, but I'd drive to the bushes at the last minute and now I'm hiding in a motel somewhere and I can't tell you where, but if you give me $10 million, I want to make a movie.
You know, I feel bad for Corey from when you see that, when you see that performance. I mean, that buddy's a nice kid and stuff, but you can see how he was just fucking made a mockery. Like, they just beat him up, though. Well, he grew up on TV in the movies. They beat him up. Yeah, they beat him up. If you grow up in the movies, you don't have a childhood. Who the fuck do you know? Who? I named one that made it through that meat grinder of growing up famous. That's not completely fucking crazy.
Name one. Name one. Look, Miley Cyrus might have got out of it better than any of them. She's, like her new albums are really good. Look, she's a musician. She's great, bro. Don't have, you ever see those ones that she's up on the hill in Tennessee with a little band and they're singing outside in the mountains? Is she singing? Is she a cover of Jolene? Yeah, Jolene. Jolene, that whole thing on her. She's great. I've always liked it. She got a little crazy. If we play some of that, we get in trouble? Yeah, we play some of it before.
She fucking, once she started talking about no reefer, fuck her, I used to see it at the weed store all the time, but a brother, with a brother at the weed store, she was smoking more than anybody, now she quit, whatever, fuck her. Yeah, she's 23, she's talking shit. Whatever she is, she's a kid. She's fucking got more money than God. I watched the show, I would watch the show on the road, and I'll please you. My kids like it. I love that fucking show, I love her on that show. She's tremendous. Yeah, play some of that, give me some of that.
What are in there? Really? Well, that's good. It's not like we paid a shitload of money for it. Have you seen John Wick too? It was on the end. Right? We just watched that. Like, it's entertainment. It's not going to win an Academy Award. No, I loved it. But if you think about how many hit men, like that scene in the train station, the chick with the violin, also, she puts the thing away and she takes the silencer out. Did you see Egan in that?
Are you going to try to? Yeah, I watched it twice. I haven't seen Egan. No. Egan's this part two. He plays a cab driver. So the only thing I could think about is the fight he had in the garage with the cab drivers when he was fucking shooting at him and all that shit. How nasty fucked mighty mouse's armbar. How about John Wick's armbar? And then for the shot to the head.
It ends with a bullet to the head of his armbar. We thought that he clamps you, he drops back and he goes, but he lifts you head with his foot. That's the armbar. Fucking mighty mouse picking up a guy. Fucking Ray Berg. That fucking armbar that he does is Ray Borg. Ray Borg, Ray Berg. Hey, you know what? I realize in your computer is having problems with the internet. Mine is not.
My computer has not had one. I just switched other routers. Routers. It's the Wi-Fi router.
Oh, you were on so that was on Wi-Fi and then you went to ethernet. Is that what you did? Switching back and forth between another router. Oh, I see. So who trains him? For reals, Joe Rogan. Well, he's obviously got a Machado jacket on. So they must have been doing some. But I'll tell you what, like all the jiu-jitsu moves and the judo was 100% legit. Like there was no like shenanigans. Like you see him throw somebody around and you don't believe it.
Like even his front kick. That's a legit front kick. Look, he's doing real shit. You know what else he did that was real. He did a lot. Look at he's doing all this fucking strength and conditioning footwork moving. He's doing all these roles. Another thing that he did that was super real was he did a lot of tactical firearms drills like a lot of close range handgun.
shit, where he's, you know, shooting at steel targets that pop up and hiding behind things and turning corners and shooting at targets real quick. Like legitimately looks like he knows what he's doing. Have you ever had a chat with him? Have you ever met him? No, never met him. Tremendous. A bet. He eats breakfast at Duke's. Why is it in Hollywood? Yeah, on the way out, you just go, what's up, dog? When you go, what's happening, man? Have a great day.
Yeah, this is the shit that he did. Yeah, no, he's real. There's a whole video of him going through these tactical courses and you're like, whoa, that's legit. Like he's putting in the time, man. It's 53. Fucking looks great for 53. 53. That's crazy. Looks great. Looks fucking great. That's a good Kamura. Yeah, see, like he's rolling. What is he? That's not a black belt, is he? No, he's white belt.
He, uh, what they do is they have a facility. You see this facility? Where? They just redid this in Culver City. The metronos do? No. That's Hegan? The company. The 187, whatever the name of that company is. His company? Production company. So they have everything there. Like most companies you go to have a couch and screens this shit. No. This is what, and I don't think this is the place.
They have like a real fucking place where they do all stunts. And I was, is that John over there? Yeah, John Jacques is to the right. Why? John Jacques and John. Yeah, there's Eagan, John's there, all the michatos. But all this stuff that he's doing is like super legit. There's Eagan. I mean, he's really, he really wanted to learn jujitsu. Like he learned real jujitsu as opposed to just making up some fake moves and shit.
No, his on bar with the bullet at the end is fucking beautiful. They're fun movies. They're fun, ridiculous, sort of cartoonish, violent movies. It's really good times. When he goes to Italy, the chick kills herself. I mean, it's fucking crazy. Well, who's the girl, too, that is that sort of androgynous lesbian character who's in a lot of stuff? Orange is the new black. Is that who she is? She's very pretty. She's got short hair. She's the hit woman in the movie. Oh, yeah, yeah. She plays the deaf girl.
death girl. Yeah, did you play the death girl? And what? John Wick to? No, she's the hit person. And she's the killer that wanted to kill him. The Fox her name. Did she kills herself? Is that the chick that kills herself? No, she doesn't kill herself. Just show me the fucking IMDB. No, that's not it. Who's in the Ruby Rose? That one. Yeah, that chick. You know, she's real famous lesbian type character.
Oh, yeah, she's that she plays a death. That's it. She's a death in the movie. I don't remember. Remember, she was like this and she's telling them that she want to make cap and shit, but she's always speaking. Yeah, she speaks sign language in the movie. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's right. Why did I? How did I forget that?
Stop smoking weed not go but that's why I got sucker cuz I'm just busy with sober I'm just watching people get shot. I'm not paying attention to the actual plot. It's just a fun stupid No, I love him both. That's a weird I love him. I like all his fucking movies, man There's just some people he wants their movies don't need to think yeah Well, he's he's got some classics. I mean think about the John Wick series. He's in the Matrix and
I mean, this dude has been in some fucking classics and Bill and Ted's excellent adventure. That's right. You go back to that. I mean, imagine that that guy started with like a really silly comedy and then went from that to be a giant action hero and somehow or another still looks good at 53. What's that movie he made with the bank robbers?
that they fucking predict. That's a good movie. Patrick Swayze, fucking good movie too. Yeah, I want to know what Keanu Reeves does to reduce stress because he looks fucking fantastic. Yeah, look at him. Look, he's never in trouble. You never hear from him in the bar or drinking or drinking wine or hanging out with nobody or abuse. He don't do dick.
He grows his beard out, he walks around looking dirty. When you see him in the daytime, he's just a regular guy. Like, what is he doing? How does he look so good? He's just a regular guy. There's no trouble. I know, but I wonder what he eats. Because someone told me that he actually smokes cigarettes. Like, he's not particularly
like disciplined about his health. That's incredible. 94 to 2014. How's that even possible? Imagine if he ran into one of his ex-girlfriends. He looks exactly the same. She looks like an old hag. She's like, what the fuck? I mean, that's 20 years of difference and he looks the same. Well, he looks like shit in the 2013, no. 2012, 2013 was a rough turn. Fell off the road.
Well, that's when he met Hegan and everything changed. He started doing jiu-jitsu and his life fucking change. He's starting a podcast. He called me up to go down there and do it. On what? On some network down there. Should he maybe learn English first or no? Yeah, no, he doesn't matter. They love him anyway. They love him. Is that him smoking cigarettes? Yeah. So he does smoke cigarettes. Yeah. Yeah. See, that's even crazier. Like, how is he not old as fuck?
Like when people smoke cigarettes, that shit wears you out. Like the people that I see that smoke cigarettes, they look far older. There he is. Maybe he's one of... I don't know. You're seeing that meme that people think there's like pictures they find where he's like, oh, can I read from the 1750, whatever, yeah. People are retarded.
They photoshopped the shit out of that anyway, right? I watched some crazy shit last night, Joe Ron. I didn't feel good. I couldn't move much. I lost the remote. And I started watching this thing about the story of the reels. Fucking tremendous. The reels? It's called Real News or something. It's 239 on cable. And they had this whole thing out about the Godfather. Fucking interesting. It's fuck Jack. What was interesting about it?
What's his name didn't want to do the movie? The director. He was a hippie in San Francisco. Really? Had a studio up there. What's his name? Francis Fort Coppola is a hippie guinea. He ain't regular guinea. He's hippie. Long hair. He owns a vineyard. Yeah, hippie dude. Had the studio and they wanted him to do the godfather. And he was like, ah, but he had an assistant called. What's his assistant's name?
Uh, George Lucas was a young assistant. Really? Yeah, it was his young assistant at the time. That's crazy. And he talked them into it because he goes at the building. Man, it was running out of money. They had no money to pay the rent. Wow. So they were going to run out of the rent. So he talked them into doing it because he had to pay the rent.
Look at that. Look at George Lucas and Francis Ford Coppola with R2D2. That's incredible. George Lucas, he was like 24 years old. Young kids, bro. Young kids. I'll tell you what, was a good move that a lot of people were critical of when they sold Star Wars to Disney.
Because Disney is taking that shit and run with it. They run with it. I mean, they're making so many more Star Wars movies. They're good fucking movies. They're fun. They're doing Star Wars World at Disneyland, which looks insane. They released a preview video of it the other day. Have you taken your girl to Disneyland yet?
No, she hasn't asked you. I'm dead. I'll please. I'm just wait. I'm dead. She hasn't she asked about a month ago. Well, tell me when you want to go and we'll go together. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, she she asked about a month ago. We'll go together. It's just stop getting sick, bro. Oh, really? We just got over it. Yeah, that's why I'm not doing new years with you know that shit because we're gonna wait.
Does she look out the window? How does she not get car sick? Well, keeps her from getting. We leave early and I don't feed her. We take her out of the house fucking soldier style. Oh, that's good. And we only go one hour. So that's why we went to Huntington Beach. We go to Santa Barbara. Right. So that's what I'm going to do on those little holidays now. That's good. Just get in the fuck out of here. I'm sick and tired of sitting here for Thanksgiving.
Yeah, take it down to Hellington Beach. I got the nice hotel for kids. You drop more for eight days surf. You could have the walk to the fucking beach for them to walk on the on the street and then I'll go up to Montecito with them for new years. I love it up there. Yeah, yeah, that's it, bro. Go on. Come back from Portland.
That Friday, I get back that Thursday, that Friday I'm doing the two shows after Christmas. Get back and I'm taking them up the month to see though to the second. There's nothing to do down here. Nothing to do. Nothing to do. Have you thought about moving out of here? Just waiting. Just waiting for another year. Another year? What are you thinking of going? I don't know. It's Colorado or Lexington, Kentucky.
Huh. Yeah. There's a lot of people here, Joey Diaz. Seems like it's getting worse, too. The thing that freaks me out is the eminent doom. That one day, for sure, the Earth's going to move. The fucking water pipes are going to break. Fire is going to break out. It's going to, for sure, we're going to have a disaster. And when we have a disaster, then we're going to realize the real consequences of jamming 20 million people into a small area.
That bothers me. When all this was going on this summer, and for two or three weeks, you'd watch the news. When you think of that, like, we got to be next. We're sitting here in our cozy, fucking warm, living room was watching Florida underwater, Texas underwater, you know, what's going to come to us? Well, the fires of Northern California were fucking insane. Hardly anybody talked about them.
It's not a ton of people living up there. So people didn't get the amount of press that it deserved because there was so much going on in Texas, so much going on in Florida, so much going on in Puerto Rico. But the fucking fires in Northern California were insane and they couldn't do anything about them. They didn't have fire hydrants in a lot of these places. They didn't have access to water and they were just burning through towns. I think they said hundreds of people are missing and thousands of buildings were burnt to the ground and it barely made the news.
Puerto Rico is still without my oh yeah they're fucked they're fucked and they're not getting any funding and you know how come they're not getting funding they got some I mean it's not that they're not getting funny but then they're not getting enough to rebuild to do what they need to do to get their infrastructure people don't understand about Puerto Rico is that you have someone and be a wholesome one and after that what surrounds these cities is what you see on TV is these fucking
Villages. Yeah. You know, did you read the New York Times article about Cuba? No. About the hurricane? How good they are with hurricanes? No. You had to read that article. What they do? They've been practicing these shits as 1915. Well, they have to. They're a fucking I. When I called my system, my system was like, it was three days.
We got killed. They got killed and come our way. Where my dad's from, they got fucking killed. That's still underwater. But they don't fuck around. They have this complete. If you could look it up, a New York Times article, it was fucking huge about how they handle hurricanes. How did they handle it? Community, they fucking, what's that when they pull you out? They pull you out right away. I mean, they just, like, you didn't hear about you, but I have any problems.
No, they got killed, but they are so used to it. They have such a great system to deal with it. They only have there you go hurricane tips. Yeah, there you go. Unbelievable. How is that right there? The water hitting? Yeah, that's a molecule.
Look at that, they got a 1950s car and the water is like fucking 80 feet in the air smashing waves against the side of the building or the side of the road rather. How cool is that car? It's pretty bad. Look at that fucking car. How cool is that car? They take those cars and they put like four cylinder beagles in them too. They do all kinds of crazy shit with those cars. Did you watch that show? When they do the 13 episodes of the human cars? No.
But I've seen a lot of things on there. Pretty interesting. How they fucking paint them and how they make all that shit. They get like tar and they put the car together. Pretty interesting shit. There was a guy who bought an island outside of Cuba.
I forget what island it was, but it got hit so bad by the hurricane that it completely wiped off everything on the island. This guy, some billionaire character bought the entire island. And for the first time in over 300 years, it's unpopulated. There's literally no one living on this island. It went from being this green lush island to being just a big flat patch of dirt, like flattened. It just got hit by the full brunt of the storm right after this dude bought it.
I mean, I don't know how much he spent on it. Is that Richard Branson's island? I don't think so. No. No, I think it was the guy who owns John Paul Mitchell.
Nectar Island completely. Oh, no, we noticed. Use ad blocking. So Richard Branson says Nectar Island completely and utterly devastated by Hurricane Irma. Yeah, I'm sure that island got jacked, too. But there was an island that is completely unpopulated for the first time in 300 years. Forget what the island was. But these are just going to get worse. The crazy thing about these hurricanes is they're building up steam out in the ocean versus in the Gulf. Usually, they would get to the Gulf
And they would build up because the Gulf has warmer water. But the water in the ocean is getting so warm. Yeah. The island of Barbuda, I don't think. Yeah, that's it. I don't think somebody owns that one. No, someone just bought it. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah, some guy just bought the island of Barbuda. Let me ask you something, Barbuda. I think. So you've been thinking about leaving? Yes. You're thinking about staying. No, I think about leaving all the time.
Well, when it was getting 109 degrees in fucking October, we were like, what is this going to be like in five years? Like, is this going to keep getting worse? Like, if climate change is real, it seems to be. If we're getting record temperatures every year, which seems to be happening, at least around here.
You got to wonder like when that's not sustainable anymore. When you do you want to live in Phoenix in August? I don't you know that that Phoenix weather. We've been there before. It's 120 degrees. That's not that's not dealable to me. You know, we got to we got to assume that Robert De Niro vows to rebuild the island of Barbuda after Hurricane Irma strikes. Why is it filled with black chicks? He owns the year before I guess he bought a resort.
Jamie's taking it all later on. No, no, no, that's not why. Oh my God. Did you ever see when they did the fucking benefit for him? They did the tribute to Robert De Niro? No. And Beyonce got up there with a fucking mini skirt and started dancing. Poor Robert De Niro. Did he go crazy? Oh my God. You can see him just melting like salut. Look at that dog skin.
He loves he loves the sisters. He does can't be mad for that. It's kind of interesting like is there another famous guy that's known for love and black chicks as much as De Niro is No, no, no, he's like known for it
where you crack jokes about it and everybody knows the joke, right? It's known for it, but nobody really says that, because it's an era. Right. You know what I'm saying? Well, I mean, it's not a problem. It's just got a thing. Yeah, that's just flavor. That's what you like. What the fuck are you going to do? But it's an obvious flavor. It's like, I mean, I can't even think of a single celebrity that's like known for having a predilection for Asian chicks. Name one. OK, name another celebrity that's got a thing for black chicks.
It's De Niro. It's like De Niro is the running joke. Well, at least life's. He's got a thing for Asian chicks. Didn't he? I think. Maybe. Yeah, maybe. Maybe he's married to one or something. Something, something. Yeah, but not enough where you could tell a joke about it. Like De Niro is one of those guys where, like, a piece of information has to be so far distributed, so widely distributed they can crack jokes about it.
and everybody knows what you're talking about. Like that's like the De Niro thing. It's gotten to the point where anybody could crack a joke about it. Did you prefer any particular woman type when you were dating? No, not really. I like white chicks. Yeah. Yeah, I love white chicks. Dirty white chicks, love them, love them, love them, love them. Chinese, I like, you know. Why dirty white chicks? Yeah, I love white dirty white. I don't know. Just something about, as a kid, I like the Irish chicks. I grew up in a place where they'll, I was surrounded with chicks with freckles and
Red hair and sweaty tits. I love all that shit. I don't like dirty feet, but I like white chicks. I like dirty feet. I like white chicks.
They say when you're a kid, like the things you're surrounded by and the things that like you first come in contact with when you become sexually active, that sort of like cements in your brain and a lot of people. But I know those Marines and all those Genas, I can't deal with that either. Marines and Genas? I love Italian towns. I love Italian towns, but there's a lot of fight. They get leases, Genas. Yeah, they want to fight and shit. They want to scream at you and throw shit. Yeah, I didn't. There was something about that. I liked them. They were hotter than fucked. I love Italian women, you know?
But I really like white chicks. Irish chicks is my shit. I don't know what it is. I love them. I fucking love them. But to just, like, I have a friend that's Jewish and that's all he dates is black chicks, you know, really, heth from the sopranos. Yes. What was the old man when, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
I have a buddy, same thing, Jewish guy. Love black chick. That's all married to second black chick. Yeah, they do. Oh, that's right. That's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know that guy. Yeah, no, man. That's coming. And it's funny because you think of like a black, like De Niro, he's an older guy, you know, he was around. I could just imagine the first time De Niro went home. Oh, yeah. I've brought a black chick home. This dad's like, what the fuck is going on there, you know?
Well, maybe not his dad, but how about all those fucking people that loved him in those movies? All those ginsos? They were probably racist. And then loved him and all these, and expected him to be with some fucking mafia looking lady. And he shows up with some super soul sister. That's why fucking Bronx Tale was so good. He really put that part of his life in there.
like that part with the black chicken and that kid that went to jail. That's what Bronx Tale was about, really. It was about... I don't even remember that movie. Yeah, it was about Bronx Tale. It was a good fucking movie. And we just... I hated it in the movie theater. When I went to see it, I didn't like it. And it wasn't for me. But now it was on a couple weeks ago, that scene with the bikers. That's a great fucking scene. And that's a true story.
That's a true fucking story. It's this old school, Sammy the Bull story. A bunch of bikers went into his bar, Sammy came back, told him to be cool, no. Clocked the door and said, no, you can't leave. And they just be, you ever seen that? They just meet the fuck out of all those bikers and they get out of there. But that movie was about the kid that was on the Sopranos that ended up going to prison for murder. What's his collage at all? Yeah.
Oh, this is hilarious. But the guy with bad luck, his name was Mush. So they put him in the closet. They wouldn't even. I don't want his money touching my money. He's so bad luck. But that whole thing is about him dating the blackjack. And then they go to the Bronx. Remember that street in the Bronx where I used to get Nickel bags, it's whatever avenue. All that shit up there. So it ends in a black neighborhood. So he would have to walk home.
And then when the walk home, his four friends went into the black neighborhood with the car and they got blown up. There you go, watch this movie again. That's right. It's a good movie, man. That jazz palmentary guy, he did a lot of shit and then he kind of vanished. But he's still around. He's doing this shit in Broadway now. What's he doing? The Bronx Tale on Broadway. He just took it out to see. He took it out to the new musical.
Got him with the gay community. Look at there De Niro and who's the guy on the left? That's the gay guy We tell a Bronx town. Yeah, this is a good movie man bizarre bizarre remember this guy lived at your boys And they said to go home at night and tell stories every night
so those guys are pissed because they said supposedly took some of the stories frankie rinsoli and then karen zulis most of his stories from he's boston actually wound up in this movie so he did uh... they they kinda have friend julie was the kind of sopranos right he was a pranos he's written for a lot of things that world that world of guineas and mob movies and mob stuff it's just like it becomes
It's like an identity in a weird business. It's like an identity that they put on. The connected Italian character identity. And from the Sopranos on, that became a big selling point in Hollywood. It was a niche.
you know the people got excited about like the Italian gangster movie became a big thing the Italian gangster films became a big thing and so there was like a whole bunch of guys like I'm sure you went out for auditions and you were around those guys that were in that loop
It's a dumb lube. It's a dumb lube. It's hilarious. It really is a lot. Well, we're never talking about last night. Like, look, the Sopranos killed the mafia TV show. That's it. You won't see another mob movie again for 10 years. Because it's so good. Yeah, it just covered too many in the Bay. You've never seen it again. Every once in a while, I get a script for a mob movie. And they want you to read for this. I open it up and if I see Gino,
Vinny or Tony or Angelo I closed the script Because you're living in a fucking fools paradise. It's not gonna get made or it's not gonna do nothing You got to come and that's why they haven't been able to figure out the post soprano world, right? It was too much. They got into the Columbus. Yeah, I mean they even got into Columbus day That's how brilliant the fucking sopranos were They did an episode about Columbus day when they sent people down there nicked Apollo played the cop and
Oh, yeah. Do you remember that Soprano started off as a comedy? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Soprano started off the first episode was over the top comedy, where what's her name? Edie Falco was outside with an AK-47 because her daughter was trying to sneak out. Yeah, yeah. I mean, she was a cartoon character. I mean, it was ridiculous. And then slowly but surely, it became this really intense, complicated drama. And it wasn't funny at all.
Well the mother died and that changed everything. It was the first show that somebody died and changed the cause of it.
because it would have been completely different. It would have ended with her being the boss. It would have been the first time her. But they went back to this last night with the Godfather, how they had failed twice to make a mob movie. Kirk Douglas had done a movie in 67 that didn't do well. So when this Mario Puzo was fucking, the book was tremendous. They sent it to what's his name. They did not want Marlon Brando.
Really? No, they did not. Marlon Brando had been a dud. He had just done fucking that movie on the percent, that movie where he bought the island. Oh, island of Dr. Moreau? No, no, the one, the big one when he first bought the island in seventy sixty eight or something. He bought his own island. Right, but he shot the movie, uh, bounty. What is it, the treasure? I forget what the name of the movie is. Monte Cristo or something. No, they gave him a bunch of money and go down there and shoot the movie. He found love one of the natives.
So he got like the first guy. Hey, Jamie, come here. Direct the movie. And he started fucking her every day. So Paramount wanted the footage. When Paramount saw the footage, they saw birds and people running. They go, what happened to our movie? So they kind of like fucking fired a brand-off from directing it. Mute me. Mute me on the bounty.
So he was done. He was, he came back to the States like he was persona non grata. They didn't want to talk to him no more. You fucked our money. You left your wife for this hot chicken and island. Yeah. She's hot. Yeah. Once he met her, he told his wife to go fuck the cell. Paramount to go fuck themselves. And he just started hanging out. Go full, go full screen with her. God damn. I get it. Holy shit. That's legit, huh?
Boy, what the fuck am I? Oh, man. She's fucking hot. That's some serious Polynesian jeans right there, baby. So when he came back, they didn't want, you know, they didn't want Michael either. What? They wanted, they wanted. Didn't want to help, but you know what you mean? For Michael Corioline? They wanted, uh, Robert Redford. Whoa, what?
Or a Ryan O'Neill. Oh, that's hilarious. That's who they want. That's what they want if a Rocky. That's hilarious. Ryan O'Neill. That's what they want. And that answer, from 73 to 75, we need a black actor. How about Ryan O'Neill? We need a boxer. How about Ryan O'Neill? They love Ryan O'Neill's look, so they were going to put him in Rocky. You don't even hear about him anymore. Well, he's 90,000 fucking years old. What is this? His original cast list, like people he had written down for the cover. For what movie? For the Godfather.
Wow. Jimmy Khan. Jimmy. So who is, who wrote this list? This is Coppola's list. Coppola's list. Wow. Corleone, Marlon Brando, underlined.
He wanted, he wanted Appuccino badly. He just did that movie about the heroin or something. And they didn't want him. The studio didn't want him? No, the studio didn't want him. He wanted him, but the studio didn't want him. Wow. So fucking, John Saxon was going to play Sonny Corleone. That would have been terrible. John Saxon from the editor Dragon, yeah.
That guy was a good actor. Yeah, Robert Duvall for Tony. Look at that list. Wow. That's amazing. Yeah, there's some movies that just, even today, if you try to watch them, they're phenomenal. That's one of them. This one's one of them. This one's one of them. Don't watch the one with the brought back footage though. Which one's that? The one that HBO released. I don't like Sonny. You could tell how bad James Connors is an actor then.
Oh, it's brutal. It's brutal. Have you seen the eight hour one? No HBO where they put them all together? No. They put them all together and they put all the pieces back in. Really? But you got a lot to have a lot of time. Eight hours? Yeah, it's like six hours. It was a good time for that.
You break it up into two-hour segments. But it's pretty interesting. It shows you what really happened with the father and him. Like the father would just torture Michael. How you doing? How's that little white girlfriend doing? All right, hysterical. There's a scene in the hospital where he pulls him over and goes, that's that little white piece that has no other shit. Did you tell her? And then he, like, how is those metals? One of those shooting people, he's shooting strangers and shit.
And then they go into, it opens up with them at the wedding, and they go from the wedding to the hospital to see the guy, the originally comes to the Eddie, and you gotta see that scene. The dude is sitting there, and our brand-go walks in, and he's like, Godfather, hold my hand. The reaper's gonna come, but if he sees you, he'll be scared. Like, that's how fucking much they love the Godfather. And then he goes, listen, I'm here with my four sons. He ain't gonna bother you.
I'm here with your sons. I'm here with my sons to pay the respects to you. He ain't going to bother. He shows all that shit. They got that blew up his wife in Sicily. It shows them getting him in Buffalo now.
Oh, really? They put that back in? Yeah, he owns a pizza pile and he gets in the car and they blow them up. They show all that shit. So who cut that stuff out? The studio or the director? The studio, I think. It was too long? Yeah, you know, don't quote me on that. Maybe the studio, maybe the director. But James Kahn's scenes are just not too bueno. No. You can see he doesn't. But Michael's fucking tough. Michael's a lot to all those dudes. That's when directing was directed. If you've ever done anything bad in your life, if you haven't done anything bad,
When you do something bad, you know, your ears ring. Your ears ring? Oh, when your adrenaline's off the charts, when you're hiding in a bush, and somebody's coming towards you, and you got to hit them with that stick, you have no idea what happens to you. You have no idea, Joe Rogan. That's why I've always loved the Godfather, all those type of movies, because when he comes out of the bathroom, you hear the train screeching? Gee. Right. But that's what you hear when your heart's pumping, bro.
When your heart's pumping, I'm just talking about hitting somebody in the head with a stick, right? Never mind having to come out of a restaurant with a gun and shooting two people. I can't imagine where your heart goes, the way that you just get up and shoot people. Your heart beats, the adrenaline's going. You fucking, you don't hear nothing. Like when I wish to rob houses or rob drug dealers, I can't hear nothing.
You just go on the bro. You just go on the your heart takes fucking over. You know I had this I forgot about this I had this when I was 19 I was an electrician did you know that an Aspen? Yeah, there was a there was a dude that used to break my balls all the time Like say stupid things for me. We'll always go there's two things about you I don't like you Cuban and you're from these coasts So I always knew me and this guy were gonna have a little fucking problem. I was 19. He was a little older than me
I always knew me and this motherfucker would have a problem. And he'd always say little things to me. Go get my tools out of the bag. And I'd always tell him, go get them yourself, bitch. And I was kind of scared of the guy, but I knew me and him were gonna battle one day. And one day he said something, I told him to go fuck himself. And when I came back from lunch, he put a box cutter to my throat.